This Christmas I got my nephew Sam a board game called
“Concept.” It wasn’t on his list, but I think he will like it because he
enjoys board games. It runs in the family. I remembering playing Life,
Candyland, Risk, etc. as a kid. One of our favorites was Monopoly. And I
want to use the playing of Monopoly today on this Feast of the Holy
Family as analogy to remind us how to think about our families.
This past month I read a new book by Marcus Grodi entitled, Life
from our Land: The Search for a Simpler Life in a Complex World. The
book tells of how Grodi and his family inherited 25 acres of farmland in
Ohio and moved out there to live on the land as amateur farmers.
Among the lessons and graces he gained from that experience is proper
perspective in this life.
Grodi lays out one of his points by what he calls, “The Parable of
the Game,” Imagine, he says, that you sit down with friends or family to
play a game of, say, Monopoly. As the evening goes on you experience
the usual ups and downs of the game. You buy properties, build houses
and hotels, make money, lose money. You spend some time in jail, etc.
And among all this activity you and the other players bicker and barter,
eat snacks, get angry, laugh out loud. Maybe in the end there’s a good
sized pile of that colorful money sitting in front of you – or not. But
then the game is over and you all pick up the game, putting the little
hat, race car, and shoe, back in their places, sort out the money, and
gather the cards. And then you all go home to your real lives.
Grodi asks us, “To what extent do the successes and failures you
had in the game that evening affect the rest of your life?” This Feast of
the Holy Family is a good time to ask ourselves if we are living in such a
way that recognizes what counts in life and what doesn’t. How much of
our worries are about the equivalent of Monopoly money? What part
of our energy is spent on the game and how much on what will remain
after the game is over? For Grodi, the simpler life in his farm reinforced
what he already knew intellectually, that other than God, and family –
and other human beings, everything else – money, jobs, success, his
farm -- gets picked up and put away in the end.
On the other hand, there is some carry over! For instance, Grodi
writes that even the playing of a seemingly silly game can impact one’s
lasting, larger life relationships. Being a jerk or cheat while playing a
game does have some impact on one’s relationships with the players
afterwards. How many of us suffer because we couldn’t play well with
others as children -- and still can’t as adults.
Did we enjoy playing the game? A game is meant to be enjoyed
after all. Can we have fun? Can we get joy out of this earthly life – even
if it is passing away? That will also have an impact on how we live life.
Were we grateful to the host? It may just be a game, but the host
invited us in, gave us snacks. Welcomed us. Did we say, “Thank you?”
Did we clean up after ourselves? Good lessons for all of life.
So there is a balance that has to be maintained in life between
playing a game, and the majority of life that lies outside it. In other
words, the things of this world aren’t the main thing, but they can
influence the real deal – our eternal life.
Most of us have just spent good parts of this past weekend with
our families. If they are like mine they are still works in progress as far
as becoming holy families is concerned. If we were to examine what has
happened these past days where have we looked for, and experienced,
joy? Where have we experienced conflict or sin? How much of the
conflict was rooted in the events of what Grodi called the “game,” thisworldly concerns that don’t really matter? How much of our joy and
satisfaction sprang from the events of the game? How much from our
real relationships with God and with our family members who are
meant to be our brothers and sisters in Christ in eternity?
Holy families are achieved by a balance. We have to play the
game of this world well – enjoy it, be thankful in it, use its obstacles and
challenges to test us and help us grow in virtue and show love. But we
can’t get caught up in the game to the point we lose track of what will
last.
And our families will last forever. They’re supposed to come
before the world’s game. Do they? The people we spent this Christmas
weekend with – despite their sins and weaknesses, God loves them,
wants us to love them, put us in the world precisely to learn to love
them. If we play the world’s game with that as our goal, not according
to the world’s rules of winning, then when the game is over, and all is
picked up and put away, we’ll find we’ve won everything in the game
that counts forever.