Guiding Children
How do we effectively manage behavior of children.
Guidance
 Using firmness and understanding to help children
learn how to behave.
 Children learn self-discipline when effective guidance is
employed.
 Guidance promotes security and positive self-esteem
 When effective guidance is used, children develop a
conscience
How?
 Be a role model
 Give effective directions
 Set limits
 Provide positive reinforcement
Effective Directions
 Be sure to have child’s attention
 Be polite
 Use positive statements
 Use specific words the child can understand
 Begin with an action verb
 Give a limited number of directions at a time
 Be clear
 Give praise and love
Set Limits
 Does the limit allow the child to learn explore, and
grow?
 Is the limit fair and appropriate for the child’s age?
 Does the limit benefit the child, or ist it just for the
adult’s convenience?
Positive Reinforcement
a response that encourages a
particular behavior
 Be specific
 Comment on the behavior as soon as possible
 Recognize small steps
 Help child take pride in their actions
 Tailor the encouragement to the needs of the child
 Use positive reinforcement wisely
Dealing with inappropriate
behavior
Questions to ask when dealing with inappropriate
behavior
 Is the expected behavior appropriate for the
developmental age of the child?
 Does the child understand the behavior was wrong?
 Did the child do the behavior knowingly and
deliberately, or was it beyond the child’s control?
Unintentional behavior
 The child had no way of knowing the behavior was
wrong
 Did the child have no control over the action
 Was the action an accident?
Effective Punishment
 Reminds children that correct behavior is important
 Teaches there are consequences for poor choices
 Avoids blame and criticism
 If a rule is broken, young children should be reminded
of the rule
 Punishment should be in proportion to the misbehavior
Negative Reinforcement
a response aimed at
strengthining a desired
behavior by removing an
unpleasant trigger
 Natural consequences
 Logical consequences
 Loss of priveledge
Natural Consequences
Children suffer from the actual result of their action
 Child breaks toy, parents don’t replace it
 Don’t lecture
 Don’t remedy the situation for the child (defeats the
purpose of a consequence)
Logical Consequences
The consequence has a connection to the misbehavior
 Often used when natural consequences would be
inappropriate (damaged property, the natural
consequence doesn’t bother child)
 Be prepared to follow through
 Lack of follow through shows children that they don’t
need to take their parents seriously
Loss of Privileges
 Both natural and logical consequences are not
appropriate (dangerous consequences)
 Most effective in children 5 and over
 If possible, make privilege connect to misbehavior
Time out
A short period of time in which a child sits away from other
people and the center of activity
 A chance to calm down and regain self-control
 One minute for each year of the child’s age
 Child needs to acknowledge action that resulted in time
out.
Poor disciplinary measures
 Bribing
 Promise to behave
 Shouting/yelling
 Shaming or belittling
 Threating to withhold love
 Exaggerating consequences.
Bottom line
Be consistent
 Clear rules
 Helps children know what is expected
 Helps children learn trust and confidence
 All caregivers should be on the same page