Or not?
Marriage Unit
 Describe a life event that
happened during your
“marriage” or
“roommate” scenario.
How did it impact your
budget?
 Target- Cohabitation and
divorce statistics.
What happens after the wedding?
 Oprah clip on
“after the
wedding blues”.
Discussion
 What do you think about these brides?
Cohabitation
 Cohabitation is defined
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as living together
without being married.
Serial cohabitation is
becoming more
common.
It used to be illegal….
50% break up in the
first year
90% break up within 5
years.
Divorce Statistics.
 The divorce rate in America for first
marriage is 41%
 The divorce rate in America for second
marriage is 60%
 The divorce rate in America for third
marriage is 73%
Age at marriage for those who
divorce in America
Age
Women
Men
Under 20 years old
27.6%
11.7%
20 to 24 years old
36.6%
38.8%
25 to 29 years old
16.4%
22.3%
30 to 34 years old
8.5%
11.6%
35 to 39 years old
5.1%
6.5%
Kids reduce divorces.
 According to discovery channel,
couples with children have a
slightly lower rate of divorce
than childless couples.
Sociologists also believe that
childlessness is also a common
cause of divorce. The absence of
children leads to loneliness and
weariness and even in the
United States, at least 66 per
cent of all divorced couples are
childless.
Financial effects of divorce on
women & children. .
 5 out of 6 children of divorced parents live with their
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mothers.
Divorced individuals would need a 30% increase in income
in order to stay at the same standard of living.
1 in 5 women fall into poverty after a divorce.
3 out of 4 mothers do not receive full payments of child
support.
About 1 in 3 women who own a home and have children
living at home lose their homes.
Men & Divorce
 Some people seem to believe that men are financially better off
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after a divorce than they were during their marriage.
Research shows that this is a myth.
Men also have a reduced standard of living by 10-40%
depending on the circumstance.
Why- Two factors contribute to this financial loss. First, if his
ex-wife contributed a substantial income to the family, he will
struggle to make up for this lost second income. Second, he is
likely to be required to make child-support and other
payments.
He also must pay for a separate home or apartment. In
addition, if a father has custody or shares custody of his
children, there will be additional expenses.
Divorce effects on Kids 
 Most divorcing parents are very concerned about their
children’s reactions to their separation and divorce.
They want to know, “Will my child grow up to be
healthy and happy?”
 Sociologists and psychologists are just beginning to
provide reliable information about the effects of
divorce on children.
 Age, gender, personality and the amount of conflict in
the home contribute to the outcome.
Infants
 Infants may not understand
conflict, but may react to
changes in parent’s energy
level and mood.
 Infants may loose their
appetite or have an upset
stomach and spit up more.
Pre- School Aged Children
 Children from three to five years of age frequently believe
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they have caused their parents’ divorce.
They might think that if they had eaten their dinner or done
their chores when told to do so, Daddy wouldn’t have gone
away.
Preschoolers may fear being left alone or abandoned
altogether.
They may show baby-like behavior, such as wanting their
security blanket or old toys, or they begin wetting the bed.
They may become uncooperative, sad, or angry.
Although they want the security of being near an adult, they
may act disobedient and aggressive.
 Some psychologists believe the adjustment to parental divorce is more difficult
for elementary school children
 than for younger or older children. School-age children are old enough to
understand that they are in pain
 because of their parents’ separation. They are too young, however, to
understand or to control their reactions to
 this pain.
 They may experience grief, embarrassment, resentment, divided loyalty and
intense anger. Their ability to
 become actively involved in play and activities with other children may help
them cope with their family life
 situation.
 Children this age may hope parents will get back together. Elementary
 aged children may feel rejected by the parent who left. They may complain
 of headaches or stomachaches.
Adolescents
 Teens also experience anger, fear, loneliness, depression and guilt.
 Some feel pushed into adulthood if they must take responsibility for
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many new chores or care of siblings.
Teens may respond to parents’ low energy level and high stress level
by trying to take control over the family.
Others feel a loss of parental support in handling emerging sexual
feelings.
Teens also may doubt their own ability to get married or to stay
married.
Teens may understand the causes leading to their parents’ separation.
Their ability to remember the conflict and stress of the divorce may
interfere with their ability to cope with the changes in their family.
They may also feel pressure to “choose” one of their parents over the
other, or to fault one parent over the other for the “cause” of the
divorce.
Gender
 Researchers are now finding that boys raised by fathers and girls
raised by mothers may do better than children raised by the
parent of the opposite sex.
 Boys
 School age boys living with their fathers or in joint living
arrangements seem to be less aggressive.
 They also have fewer emotional problems than those boys who live
with their mothers and have little or no contact with their fathers.
 Girls
 Girls raised with mothers tend to be more responsible and mature
than girls raised by their fathers.
 However, the children’s adjustment following a divorce has more
to do with the quality of the parent-child relationship than with
the gender and age of the child.
What do you think?
 Based on the information presented in the dating,
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marriage unit, write a one page reflection on how this
information has influenced your thoughts and ideas
about marriage.
Did it change your mind?
Did it solidify your beliefs?
Do you want kids?
Do you think you should have jobs prior to marriage
(unemployment for some of you was rough!)
Do you have more respect for your parents now?