Copyright Please Do Not Use or Reproduce the contents of Toolbox without the consent of Joel Shimoji. [email protected] Welcome to The Restitution Toolbox Ingrid Pedersen Joel Shimoji March 5, 2004 What’s in the Toolbox? 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. Introduction Basic Needs T-Charts and Y-Charts 30 Second Interventions Weaving Collapsing Conflict Recommended Reading The Hardest Job There Is William Glasser contends that effective teaching is not only the hardest job in the school, it is the hardest job there is. Job Types Things People Compliant Resistant The September 10, 1997 issue of the Journal of the American Medical Association includes an article entitled "Protecting Adolescents from Harm" (JAMA. 1997;278:823-832). The most significant finding of this article was: "Parent-family connectedness and perceived school connectedness were protective of every health risk behavior measure except history of pregnancy." Academic Achievement Traced Technical 6% Factors beyond the school’s control 18% Quality of human interaction 76% The Big Picture M A N A G E R M O N I T O R Behavior Prosocial behavior “Grey Area” behavior Toolbox Social contract Restitution lessons: • T-charts • Needs • Y-charts • Behavior car • 30 sec. interventions • Weaving • Collapsing conflict • Bottom line behavior: Prevents learning, compromises safety Violence/ harassment Drugs Weapons Defiance • R e m o & v e P r o a c t i v e R e s t o r a t i v e R e s t i t u t e The Five Basic Needs Connection Success Survival Fun Freedom Control Theory in the Class The characteristics of the 5 basic needs: • are universal • are genetic and in-born. • can evolve over time. • are our internal motivation. ALL behavior is purposeful. (To meet a need) Each of us is responsible for meeting our own needs. Helping to create an environment where others can responsibly meet their needs will make a stronger group. Basic Needs Connection Survival Success Freedom Fun Food Clothing Shelter Sex Security Safety Health Love Belonging Caring Cooperation Accepting Nurturing Roles Achievement Choice Joy Competence Expression Excitement Power Significance Spontaneity Competition Synergy Learning Defining Exploring Playing Commanding Flexing Games Ideas Dreams How & What How & What How & What How & What How and What Work Projects Hobbies Strength Education Imagining Independence Language Synthesis Merging Family Friends Teams Networking Joining Here and now Hands-on Action Challenge Creativity Working Earning Saving Protecting Sexuality Success Who Are You? Connection Joel Ingrid Connection Connection Success Freedom Fun Fun Freedom Success Fun Personal Needs Analysis Scale 4- Totally met Need Person (+) Dena Person (-) Mr. X Activity (+) Flea Market Activity (-) Shovel Driveway Success 4 2 3 2 3- Mostly met Fun 4 1 4 1 2- Met a little Freedom 4 1 4 1 4 1 4 1 Connection 1- Not met Adapted from Bruce Innes and Perry Goode What’s It Getting You? The Needs Behind Misbehavior 1) “What were you trying to get by (name the behavior) Tapping pencil, hitting, swearing Alternative: “What were you avoiding by _________” 2) Find the need. Listen for statement for the need. a) If you hear a need ask tray. b) If you get a “I don’t know” pass the needs Behavior Hitting Disruptive Tripping Kicked What it was getting Stand up for self “Off my case” “Have some fun.” “Be my friend” Need Power Freedom Enjoyment Belonging 3) STATE: “Should I tell you not to ( __Meet your need__)? “ Child answers: NO 4) STATE; “I agree with you.” 5) ASK: “Is there a way that you can (meet your need) without getting into trouble?” Y Charts and T Charts In 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Covey outlines habit 2 as “begin with the end in mind.” Just as contractors draw up blueprints prior to construction, teachers should help students to build a sensory snapshot of the ideal class. These charts help give you and your students a clear understanding of your destination. The Y chart is the destination/mission statement, the T chart is the map. Writing these sensory indicators (looks like, sounds like, feels like.) clarifies thought and helps break the whole into parts. My Job, Your Job As an opening exercise, a great way to set the climate of your class is to do a t-chart: My Job Your Job 1) To teach the curriculum 2) To manage a safe class. 3) To mark assignments and tests promptly. 4) To provide tutorials when needed. 5) Respect: Treat people fairly. My job is not to: 1) To learn/ study for tests 2) To bring all materials to class. 3) To respect the right of others to learn. 4) To complete assignments on time. 5) Be on task: Own your own behavior. Your job is not to: 1) To give or take abuse 2) To read your mind 3) To “make” you work/behave 1) To give or take abuse 2) To manage this class The Best Class Another way to set the climate is to get the students to brainstorm “If this was the best class you ever had, what would it look like? Sound like? What would we be doing? Looks Like The Power of a Question Managing behavior with a questions is powerful because: 1) It puts you and your students in a cooperative rather than confrontational situation. 2) As it is a request, it doesn’t make the student defensive. 3) If a student chooses not to comply, it doesn’t reflect poorly on you. 4) If told something, the strong things to do is to rebel. 5) It gets them thinking (cerebrum) instead of survival mode. (medulla) 30 Second Interventions RULES OF ENGAGEMENT NON-CONFRONTATIONAL, "HIT AND RUN" ASK A QUESTION, or GIVE THE ANSWER “YOU CAN HANDLE IT” “THANKS” 30 Second Interventions These interventions help students get back on track in a non-confrontational way: Is what you’re doing okay now? When will you be ready to start? It looks like you have a problem. How can I help you solve it? What’s the Rule? What are you supposed to be doing? What’s your Job now? What can I do to help you so you can _____? Can I help you get started? How You Say It is More Important Than What You Say Words 10% Tone 35% Face and Body 55% Face and Body Tone Words Control Me If You Can Method Avoid pain Seeking reward Selfrespect Teachers typically use one of five modes to “control” behavior. Avoid Pain Punisher Teacher does Teacher says Legacy Student says Student outcome Yells and points “If you don’t I’ll..” Guilter Preaches and shoulds “You should have known better.” Reward from others Self-respect Buddy Manager Monitor Makes excuses Counts and measures “Do it for me.” “What’s the rule?” Asks questions “What do we believe?” Rebel, blame I don’t care. Hide, lie, deny Dependency Conformity Strengthen I’m sorry I thought you were my friend. What can I do to fix it? Repeat offense Low self-esteem Consequence Weakness oriented How high? How far? Extrinsic Motivation Selfrestitution Intrinsic motivation Collapsing Conflict Jenna Go to friend’s party with sprained ankle Love and belonging Joel Wants Needs Manage the injury properly Safety 1. Go for a max. of 2 hours 3. Foot up 2. No dancing 4. You’ll drive Diane Gossen Interested in Learning More? Text references: 1)Restitution: Restructuring School Discipline Diane Gossen By William Glasser 2) Control Theory 3) Control Theory in the Classroom 4) Schools Without Failure 5) The Quality School 6) Choice Theory By Alfie Cohen 7) Punished by Rewards 8) Beyond Discipline: From Compliance to Community By Steven Covey 9) The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People Website: www.realrestitution.com Dakota Library: Professional Development Section Restitution Committee: Kelly Alexander, Mike Heilmann, Lori Miller, Lyle Morris, Ingrid Pedersen, Andrea Sharpe, Joel Shimoji, Eliza Wright. Don’t Go Toe to Toe. Stand Shoulder to Shoulder Any system that uses coercion not only undermines your relationship with others (Us vs. them mentality) it also perpetuates the very behaviors you’re attempting to extinguish or It is reinforcing or creating a failure identity. The restitution triangle is a model that uses three powerful control theory concepts: 1. We’re doing the best we can 2. All behavior is purposeful. 3. We are internally motivated. Triangle Guidelines 1. Ask in a calm tone. 2. If the student don’t answer the question or self-evalute, then weave to monitor. It’s important to state our choice is to strengthen them. 3. The main objective is to move the student to a success identity. 4. Reality therapy teaches us not to dwell on the behaviors but to help the person to meet their need in a non-harmful way. The Restitution Triangle The triangle provides a model for us to deal with people. It helps us to work with students. Side 1: Stabilize the Identity This side is designed to move the focus from conflict (medulla) to cooperation. (cortex) or from emotion to thought. We know a person needs to be stabilized when we hear blaming (acting out) or denial. (withdrawal) You may need to stabilize more than once during an interview. If a person lapses into defensiveness, guilt, or aggression, you need to return to side 1. Stabilizing Phrases 1.0 1.1 1.2 1.3 2.0 2.1 2.2 2.3 Human Frailty It’s okay to make a mistake I did the same thing when I was your age. Nobody’s perfect. Resist Placing Blame I’m not interested in fault. I’m not out to blame/punish anyone. I’m not interested in why it wasn’t done. I’m interested in when it will be done. 3.0 3.1 3.2 3.3 Perspective Sometimes a plan works the second or third time that doesn’t work the first time. Rome wasn’t built in a day. The sun will rise tomorrow. When we stabilize, we see people as being redeemable and acknowledge the potential for change. Side 2- Validate the Behavior Control Theory states that all behavior is purposeful. It’s important to ask the student what the need is and resist telling them what their need is. Success and Failure Identities Failure Identity Needs not met MAD Tatooing Tantrum Body piercing Fight Sexuality Throw Speeding Bad words SAD Crying Run to room Pout Hide Get sick Depression Drugs/alcohol Sleeping Compulsive Behavior. Needs Connection P A I N Unconditional Conditional Deep (within) Success Cheap (over others) Up and clean Fun Down and dirty Freedom To create From responsibility Survival Diane Gossen
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