Catholic Bishops’ Conference of England and Wales
HOME MISSION SUNDAY: 21 SEPTEMBER 2014
TESTIMONY – DR MATT DOYLE
Supporting ministry and outreach to non churchgoing (lapsed) Catholics
Up until getting married in 2003 (age 21) I was a perfect example of a ‘lapsed Catholic’. Although I
received Baptism as a child, and was technically a Christian, I strongly believe that it was the graces
flowing from the Sacrament of Marriage which brought me into Christ's Church. That, with a little bit of
direct influence from my wife, Wendy!
Wendy always had Faith. She was brought up an Anglican, and was well-grounded in her beliefs,
having worked through inevitable doubts as a teenager. It must have helped her being surrounded by
a warm, supportive church community - who welcomed us into their grand gothic building for our
wedding day a few years later. Perhaps it seems strange then, that within 12 months, we were both
firmly in the bosom of our local Catholic Church; and during the last 10 wonderful years, have never
looked back. Not that it's all been plain sailing - but as St Peter said to Christ: "Lord, to whom shall
we go? Thou hast the words of eternal life!" (St John's Gospel 6:69)
Going back a little, my background was from a large extended (originally Irish) Catholic family. My
parents’ generation were typical, of trying their best to follow the teachings of the Church, but
struggling to find any social context amongst the rapidly changing world. So I went to Catechism
classes, had my first Holy Communion, but failed to be Confirmed. I ended up going to a Private
Catholic Boarding School for four years, but the lack of solid Catholic teaching left me somewhat
indifferent towards Catholicism compared with any other religion. But at least I followed my friends in
serving Mass instead of serving Satan! And I received the Sacrament of Confirmation (although not
having been to Confession since my first aged 7)!
I saw it all only as a comfort during difficult times, amongst a plethora of other methods of Spirituality.
In the end I settled upon Zen Philosophy as my method of choice, and imagined I could reinvent the
wheel through my own 'enlightened' point of view. It was certainly a comfort, being able to justify
anything I felt like doing, but less profitable dealing with the consequences of my many sins and
omissions.
The best thing that ever happened to me was meeting Wendy, my future spouse: Love being my first
realisation of the Grace of God! Not something I planned, but something that hit me over the head
and changed my life forever!
Despite our happiness, in the first two years of our relationship, it was always a source of contention
that Wendy believed the Bible, and I believed only myself! This definitely explains her contribution
towards my tremendous growth as a person during University (she never backed down to my flippant
remarks), and the positive effect she had on my self-destructive behaviour. At the time of our
wedding, I was perfectly happy being in a church building, and conversing with religious people. I lost
something of the atheistic repulsion that I harboured in my late teens.
As I mentioned, Marriage was a turning point. My mother brought to my attention that I could get a
dispensation from the local Bishop, to marry in Wendy's Anglican Church Sacramentally. I had no
idea why, but I did so. Maybe God held me to my signed promise of "raising the children Catholic"!
We even had my old chaplain from school assisting the Vicar! I guess I thought racking up the
sacraments would be a good idea. Once married, we felt comfortable enough to both visit some of
my extended (Catholic) family in Norfolk, near the Medieval Marian shrine of Walsingham. In 1061
the Lady of the Manor, was instructed by the Blessed Virgin, to build a replica Holy House of
Nazareth: "Whoever seeks my help there, will not go away empty-handed!" A tall story, I thought, but
everyone needs a little help, right? What had I to lose? Wendy was overwhelmed by the experience;
when led in the Rosary by my mum's cousin Janie and it seemed things really took off for both of us.
Janie's simple act of seeing the best in us, and not being too scared to spontaneously lead us in
prayer, was both brave and inspired.
So it was, after that summer, Wendy began yearning so much to receive Communion, the Blessed
Sacrament of Sacraments, that she joined an adult Catechism group (RCIA) which led to her
reception into the Catholic Faith a few months later. Seeing Wendy study and grapple in such a
rational adult way, inspired me to follow in her footsteps, in a parallel journey. All I had to do was go
to Confession, and the doors of mercy were immediately open to me. These parallel journeys were
obviously intertwined, providing a deeper marital unity than ever before. Three years later it was our
prayers to Our Lady, again in Walsingham, that preceded the conception of our first child.
"Then you will know the Truth, and the Truth shall set you free" - St John's Gospel 8:31
My advice to any ‘lapsed Catholics’ reading this? Test the waters, in an Agnostic fashion: As an adult,
use your rationality (help is there in abundance in the history of the Church, with many great Saints
having worked through the same problems and doubts as us). Christ does not ask us for ‘blind Faith,’
but maybe just to open our hearts a little, stop talking and be attentive to what He wants to say, not
trusting in all the prejudîces of our mind.
I used to think there was a whole world out there shackled to the confines of institutionalised rules
and religion. In actual fact, it was I who was not free, but swept along in whatever currents and
ideologies surrounded and influenced me in the rapidly changing world. I realised I was a slave to
post-modernism: a casualty of the 18th century 'enlightenment' which promised a full life without God.
He has given us free-will to choose to
love Him in this life, and spend eternity
with Him in the next. He will preserve
that free-will to the extent that His
answers will be soft, and maybe difficult
to hear - ever to remain OUR choice.
Sadly a so-called Catholic upbringing
may not have opened up all the riches
of the faith to us ‘Cradle Catholics’! So
let us learn, expand our horizons,
and ensure we make it a good, informed
choice; rather than being a slave to
popularity. If we give God a small
chance, surely by definition He will show
Himself, and shower us with His
abundant Grace.
Dr Matthew Doyle, June 2014
Home Mission Sunday is resourced by the Bishops’ Conference Home Mission Desk in service of the
Department for Evangelisation and Catechesis. Email: [email protected] www.catholicnews.org.uk
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