Parenting Article No. 57
CHRISTMAS MEMORIES LAST A
LIFETIME
Christmas holidays can be a
testing time for families for many
reasons. With the end of the year
approaching fast and an apparent
increase of demand for our time
we would love to magically pull
another couple of hours a day out
of the air. What tends to suffer is either our sleep or
the time we usually spend as a family.
Children seem to look forward to Christmas each
year because of the gifts and the holidays. We as
parents often look forward to Christmas because
we see it as a chance to spend so called quality time
with our children. But does this always happen?
Most of the time, the ideas that we have about how
we would spend the holidays don’t come to
fruition.
The grand plans we have about family outings and
fun get togethers are not necessarily what other
members of our family have in mind. Whilst we
may want to go for quiet picnics or have dates at
the movies, our children are thinking about
sleepovers and shopping adventures with their
friends, going down to the skate park or playing
video games all day. The conflicting ideas about
what is a good way to spend our time over the
holidays can cause tension. Any wonder by the end
of the holidays, many parents are saying ‘Thank
goodness, they’re back to school next week’
So how do we deal with these conflicting ideas?
What plan of action can we put in place to reduce
the amount of stress experienced by our family?
The key word here is ‘Plan’. Most families have
house rules, many of which are negotiated with the
whole family present. Sit down and talk with your
children about how they would like to spend their
holidays and communicate to them how you would
like to spend it also.
Draw up a holiday calendar and allocate two or
three days to each person. Each member of the
family can do with this day what they choose –
within reason. Set aside time on the calendar for
family events and decide what these are going to
be.
Make holiday agreement about how long children
can spend watching TV or playing video games.
How many sleepovers they can have or outings
with friends? Once this is negotiated, you are
passing the responsibility of this to your children.
If your child asks to watch a video or stay over at a
friend’s house you can refer them back to the
agreements and remind them of what the
expectations are. It may mean that a “trade-off” is
required.
Discuss as a family what it is that you would all
like to do together. Make these times just for your
immediate family – no ‘tag alongs’. Spend this
time reflecting about the year and talking about
what it is your children hope for in the coming
year. These times do not have to be filled with
expensive outings – they can just be down at the
park or going for a long drive together.
Give your children ( and yourself) the opportunity
to just rest. Every day of their holidays does not
have to be filled with an activity. Let them stay in
their pyjamas until lunch time, encourage them to
just spend time in their rooms reading or
reorganising. Encourage them to bring their friends
over to your house so that you can get to know
them.
Whichever way you and your family choose to
spend the holidays, take the opportunity to
make it last a lifetime – memories of happy
family get togethers are gifts that we can take
with us wherever we go and be models for our
children when they have their own families.
For a complete list of Regional Parenting Service articles go to the City of Greater Geelong website
www.geelongaustralia.com.au/community/family/services/article/8cbc84b53070368.aspx