The Basketball
Case
The Daniel Barclay Celtics
(uncreativerAIM)
vs.
The Michael Barclay Lakers
(mbarclay623)
AIM Exchange of 03-20-2006
1
 mbarclay623:
And good luck
at Yale this weekend
 uncreativerAIM: thanks,
although the problem there is
they make you talk about
serious things
 uncreativerAIM: you've got to
hear this one case I ran
2
 uncreativerAIM:
It's a basketball
court in Harlem, and ten individuals
have assembled for a pickup game
 uncreativerAIM: These individuals,
who are all alive and in their prime,
are: Michael Jordan, Franklin D.
Roosevelt, Darth Vader, Mary
Poppins, Harry Potter, Tigger,
Dumbo the flying elephant, SpiderMan, Mother Teresa, and Jesus
3
uncreativerAIM:
you
draft one, then I draft
one, and so on until
we're up to 5 each
uncreativerAIM: then we
each argue for why our
team will win
4
mbarclay623:
Hey, you
forgot George W. Bush, a
lawyer, and a duck
uncreativerAIM: that's
true, a duck could fly,
that'd be useful
5
The Teams
mbarclay623 Lakers
1. I'll start with Jesus.
Miracles are useful
2. Spider-Man
uncreativerAIM Celtics
1. I pick Michael
Jordan, your turn
2. Darth Vader
(oddly enough, this is
going exactly like it did
in the actual round)
3. Mary Poppins
3. Harry Potter
4. Dumbo
4. Tigger
5. FDR
5. Mother Teresa
6
The Teams
mbarclay623 Lakers
uncreativerAIM Celtics
7
 uncreativerAIM:
alright, so I
think my team is pretty strong
 uncreativerAIM: first, I station
Mother Teresa under my basket,
no one would dare shove such a
saintly old woman out of the way
 mbarclay623: I put FDR on
Mother Teresa, right.
8
 uncreativerAIM:
Darth Vader can
just use his telekinesis to make the
ball fly through the air
 uncreativerAIM: hard to see how
you'd counter that
 mbarclay623: Yeah, but Jesus will
make a miracle occur -- Darth
becomes Annakin again, MJ
becomes a cartoon character, and
Harry Potter becomes a Muggle
9
 mbarclay623:
Spidey puts a
web on the ball, passes to Mary
Poppins, SLAM DUNK!
 uncreativerAIM: nice try
 uncreativerAIM: but, Jesus is
such a nice person that would
he really be able to take sides?
 mbarclay623: John 3:16
10
 uncreativerAIM:
and in terms of the
levitating English people, Potter has
much more maneuverability than
Poppins
 mbarclay623: I told you, Jesus
made him a Muggle again.
 uncreativerAIM: there's always the
"Michael Jordan is Jesus" argument
 mbarclay623: Oh yeah huh
11




mbarclay623: So where did you use this
basketball case? And how did (1) the other
team, (2) the judge like it?
uncreativerAIM: everyone liked it, it's now
almost as legendary as my "blow up the
moon with nuclear weapons" case
uncreativerAIM: although, the judges are
obligated to give silly cases the loss with
low scores
uncreativerAIM: even though they liked it
too
12
 mbarclay623:
Say, what do
Tigger and Dumbo do? (I
picked Dumbo, since he's a
huge power forward who can
fly too)
 uncreativerAIM: tigger's good
for rebounds with his mad
jumping skillz
13
The Basketball
Case
The Daniel Barclay Celtics
(uncreativerAIM)
vs.
The Michael Barclay Lakers
(mbarclay623)
AIM Exchange of 03-20-2006
14