Getting Rid Of Old Friends
• How do you feel when you have to say good
bye to an old friend? Maybe your best friend?
Maybe one who has been such a part of you
that they are family?
• Sad? Angry?
• Overwhelmed?
• Depressed?
• Anxious?
• Lonely?
• Forsaken?
Spiritual Application
• When we become Christians we are to say good-bye to our
old friends. The ones that have become a part of us and have
made us what we are.
• This can be overwhelming to some and the Lord verified this
in the parable of the sower
• Matt 13:3-9- Then He spoke many things to them in
parables, saying: "Behold, a sower went out to sow. And as
he sowed, some seed fell by the wayside; and the birds came
and devoured them. Some fell on stony places, where they
did not have much earth; and they immediately sprang up
because they had no depth of earth. But when the sun was
up they were scorched, and because they had no root they
withered away. And some fell among thorns, and the thorns
sprang up and choked them. But others fell on good ground
and yielded a crop: some a hundredfold, some sixty, some
thirty. He who has ears to hear, let him hear!"
The Parable Of The Sower Explained
Matt 13:18-23- "Therefore hear the parable of the sower: When
anyone hears the word of the kingdom, and does not understand
it, then the wicked one comes and snatches away what was sown
in his heart. This is he who received seed by the wayside. But he
who received the seed on stony places, this is he who hears the
word and immediately receives it with joy; yet he has no root in
himself, but endures only for a while. For when tribulation or
persecution arises because of the word, immediately he stumbles.
Now he who received seed among the thorns is he who hears the
word, and the cares of this world and the deceitfulness of riches
choke the word, and he becomes unfruitful. But he who received
seed on the good ground is he who hears the word and
understands it, who indeed bears fruit and produces: some a
hundredfold, some sixty, some thirty."
All who are Christians are in this parable . What kind of soil
am I? Why am I this kind of soil?
How Easy Is It To Give Up A Harmful Friend?
• Have to realize the toxic nature of such a
friendship in order for it to be easier.
• Have to realize that if they are affecting you in
a sinful way they are not your friends.
• Have to see the hurt they are causing.
• Have to face the reality that such a friendship
will only lead to more and more pain and
emptiness.
• Have to realize that there is no way to reconcile
that friendship with your new life.
Putting Off- Putting On
Eph 4:17-24- This I say, therefore, and testify in the Lord,
that you should no longer walk as the rest of the
Gentiles walk, in the futility of their mind, having their
understanding darkened, being alienated from the life
of God, because of the ignorance that is in them,
because of the blindness of their heart; who, being past
feeling, have given themselves over to lewdness, to
work all uncleanness with greediness.
• But you have not so learned Christ, if indeed you have
heard Him and have been taught by Him, as the truth is
in Jesus: that you put off, concerning your former
conduct, the old man which grows corrupt according to
the deceitful lusts, and be renewed in the spirit of your
mind, and that you put on the new man which was
created according to God, in true righteousness and
holiness.
Changing Friends?
Requires that we transform our thinking to harmonize with God’s will
• Prov. 23:7,12-For as he thinks in his heart, so is he."Eat and drink!" he says to
you, But his heart is not with you. Apply your heart to instruction, And your
ears to words of knowledge.
• Rom .12:1,2- …offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God
this is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the pattern
of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will
be able to test and approve what God's will is — his good, pleasing and perfect
will.
• Col. 3:1-3- If then you were raised with Christ, seek those things which are
above, where Christ is, sitting at the right hand of God. Set your mind on things
above, not on things on the earth. For you died, and your life is hidden with
Christ in God. When Christ who is our life appears, then you also will appear
with Him in glory. Therefore put to death your members which are on the
earth: fornication, uncleanness, passion, evil desire, and covetousness, which
is idolatry. 6 Because of these things the wrath of God is coming upon the sons
of disobedience, 7 in which you yourselves once walked when you lived in them.
But now you yourselves are to put off all these: anger, wrath, malice,
blasphemy, filthy language out of your mouth. Do not lie to one another, since
you have put off the old man with his deeds, and have put on the new man
who is renewed in knowledge according to the image of Him who created him,
Not Just Giving Up Things- But Replacing That Emptiness
With New Things- Satan Loves An Empty House
Requires that we feed upon God’s word
✦ Psalm 1:1,2- In that law we meditate day & night
✦ 1 Pet. 2:2-desire milk of word so we can grow
✦ 2 Tim. 2:15-Study and rightly divide Word.
✦ Requires that we understand & follow God’s word
✦ Mt. 7:21- Not just proclaim but do His will.
✦ Mt.13:23- Be good soil and bring forth increasing fruits.
• James 1:21-25-Therefore lay aside all filthiness and overflow of
wickedness, and receive with meekness the implanted word, which is
able to save your souls. But be doers of the word, and not hearers only,
deceiving yourselves. For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a
doer, he is like a man observing his natural face in a mirror; for he
observes himself, goes away, and immediately forgets what kind of man
he was. But he who looks into the perfect law of liberty and continues
in it, and is not a forgetful hearer but a doer of the work, this one will be
blessed in what he does.
✦
Philippians 3:12-16 (NKJV)
12 Not
that I have already attained, or am already perfected; but
I press on, that I may lay hold of that for which Christ Jesus
has also laid hold of me. 13 Brethren, I do not count myself to
have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things
which are behind and reaching forward to those things which
are ahead, 14 I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward
call of God in Christ Jesus. 15 Therefore let us, as many as are
mature, have this mind; and if in anything you think otherwise,
God will reveal even this to you. 16 Nevertheless, to the degree
that we have already attained, let us walk by the same rule, let
us be of the same mind.
Galatians 6:14-16 (NKJV)
14 But
God forbid that I should boast except in
the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ, by whom the
world has been crucified to me, and I to the
world. 15 For in Christ Jesus neither circumcision
nor uncircumcision avails anything, but a new
creation. 16 And as many as walk according to
this rule, peace and mercy be upon them, and
upon the Israel of God.
Romans 13:11-14 (NKJV)
11 And
do this, knowing the time, that now it is high
time to awake out of sleep; for now our salvation is
nearer than when we first believed. 12 The night is far
spent, the day is at hand. Therefore let us cast off the
works of darkness, and let us put on the armor of
light. 13 Let us walk properly, as in the day, not in
revelry and drunkenness, not in lewdness and lust,
not in strife and envy. 14 But put on the Lord Jesus
Christ, and make no provision for the flesh, to fulfill
its lusts.
What The Old Man-That Old Friend Offered
• Eph. 4:17-22- Attitude (state of mind)- futile
mind---darkened understanding---alienated
from life---ignorant & blind---past feeling--lewd, unclean, greedy---growing corrupt
because of deceitful lusts.
• Actions and Behaviors- Eph. 4:21-24-lying,
angry (vindictive), giving place to the devil,
stealing, corrupt speech, bitter, wrathful,
angry, malicious, unhappy, grieving the Spirit.
• This friendship was toxic and destructive.
Old Friendship vs. New Friendship
• OLD- Fornication- uncleanness- passion- evil
desire- covetousness- anger – wrath- maliceblasphemy- filthy language- lying (Col. 3:5-9).
• NEW- mercy, kindness, meekness, humility,
longsuffering, forbearance, forgiveness, LOVE,
peace of God, thankfulness, worshipful,
admonishing brethren, submitting to Christs’
authority in everything (Col. 3:12-17).
Putting On The New Man Requires
• We repent and seek God’s forgiveness in obedient faith
(whether a wayward child or one who never obey).
• Seek forgiveness from those who have hurt you or that
you have hurt and as far as it lies within you “live at
peace with all men”
• Forgive yourself and move on from the past and believe
that you new best friend JESUS is the best thing that has
eve happened to you. Get to know Him.
• Forgive whatever grievance you may harbor with others.
• Commit to making Jesus and His people your best
friends. To do that you have to cherish HIM above all
things and value those who are just like you (flawed
sinners washed in the same blood you are).
LOVE AS CHRIST COMMANDED
• Love Him and His kingdom above all else (Mt. 6:33) be active
and engaged in serving Him and be urgent to grow and reach
out to Him and your brethren.
• 1 Cor 13:4-7-Love suffers long and is kind; love does not
envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; does not
behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked,
thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the
truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things,
endures all things.
• Everything about godly love (agape) is selfless, not selfishbut self (our best friend away) and crown a new ruler and
best friend in our life (JESUS).
• Gal 2:20-I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet
not I, but Christ lives in me: and the life which I now live in
the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me,
and gave himself for me.