PATH to LOVE
Dating Agency
Mentoring for Success
getting the most from yourself & others
what is mentoring?
“Mentoring is to support and encourage people to manage
their own learning in order that they may maximise their
potential, develop their skills, improve their performance and
become the person they want to be” (Eric Parsloe)
It’s all about trust
•High degree of trust and mutual regard
•Mentee is helped to realise his or her potential
•The mentor learns and develops through the process
Mentoring for Success
getting the most from yourself & others
mentor v manager
•Managers are concerned with the objectives of both
team and organisation
•Mentors help your mentee to learn within the context of
a supportive relationship
Mentoring for Success
getting the most from yourself & others
find your perfect partner
•What skills or characteristics would you look for in a mentor?
•When finding mentors for placement students – what do you advise
your employers?
•Opportunities for developing staff
•Previous placement students and graduates
•Don’t just think manager!
Mentoring for Success
getting the most from yourself & others
toxic mentor (Clutterbuck)
•You know better than the mentee what's in his or her interest
• Be determined to share your wisdom with them • Decide what you and the mentee will talk about and when; change dates and
themes frequently to stop complacency
• Do most of the talking
• Highlight how trivial their concerns are compared to the weighty issues you
have to deal with
• Remind the mentee how fortunate s/he is to have your undivided attention
• Never show nor admit any personal weaknesses
• Never ask them what they should expect of you
•Never, never admit that this could be a learning experience for you, too
Mentoring for Success
getting the most from yourself & others
find your perfect partner
•What would you expect the mentee to contribute to the
relationship?
Mentoring for Success
getting the most from yourself & others
toxic mentee (Clutterbuck)
• Bring a long shopping list of things you want the mentor to do for you
• Expect the mentor to be available for you, whenever you want them
• Regard the mentor as your prime source of gossip to pass on
• Expect the mentor always to have the answer
• Expect the mentor to decide when to meet and what to talk about
• Boast about the relationship to your colleagues at every opportunity
• Never challenge what the mentor says - s/he is paid to know best
• Blame the mentor whenever advice doesn't work out
• Enjoy the opportunity to have a good moan or whinge
Mentoring for Success
getting the most from yourself & others
why use a mentee / mentor matching service?
• Where might you find your perfect
partner?
•Managed structure – bringing people together
•Face to face but maybe something else to help build
rapport
•Build rapport - very important – need to be ready to
share some of yourself
Mentoring for Success
getting the most from yourself & others
preparing for your first date
• Have a clear idea of what they are looking for
-evaluate own skills, aspirations, likes and dislikes
• Know what to say about themselves
-Strengths and weaknesses
• SMART Goals
Mentoring for Success
getting the most from yourself & others
THE first date
• Communicate – etiquette
• Positive attitude
• Active listening
• Questions, questions
Mentoring for Success
getting the most from yourself & others
dating skills
NON-DIRECTIVE
Listening to understand
Reflecting
Paraphrasing
Summarising
Asking Questions to raise awareness
Making Suggestions
Giving Feedback
Offering Guidance
Giving Advice
Instructing
Telling
DIRECTIVE
(Myles Downey)
Mentoring for Success
getting the most from yourself & others
THE first date
• Communicate – etiquette
• Positive attitude
• Active listening
• Questions, questions
Mentoring for Success
getting the most from yourself & others
Keeping the ‘fire’ burning!
time in learning about the mentor’s organization
and their professional roles
• Invest
• Honour commitments made to the mentor and respect
the basic privacy and confidentiality inherent in the
communication that occurs within the relationship.
• Express your appreciation for you mentor’s time,
information, counsel, and sharing of opportunities with
you
Mentoring for Success
getting the most from yourself & others
Keeping the ‘fire’ burning!
• Actively request information and counsel from the
mentor on a periodic basis
• Accept that the relationship maybe temporary
• Invite your mentor to a campus event or activity
• Dress professionally and appropriately for all meetings
with your mentor
Mentoring for Success
getting the most from yourself & others
why we looove mentoring
Mentee Gains
Career advancement –
sponsorship, exposure,
visibility, coaching,
protection and challenge,
more promotions, higher
salaries, more job
satisfaction, reduced
turnover
Psychosocial support –
friendship, confirmation,
acceptance, confidence
building and counseling
(Allen et al., 2004; Clutterbuck, 2004;
Klasen & Clutterbuck, 2002; Kram,
1985; Wang et al., 2008).…
Mentoring for Success
getting the most from yourself & others
why we looove mentoring
Mentor Gains
•
•
•
•
•
Career revitalisation,
Ability to reflect,
Intellectual challenge,
Increased interpersonal skills,
Social recognition from peers and
managers, and
• Personal satisfaction
(Clutterbuck, 2004; Young & Perrewe, 2000)
Mentoring for Success
getting the most from yourself & others
why we looove mentoring
Can you afford not to get involved in
mentoring?
• Mentoring for your students
• Mentoring for your graduates/alumni
• Mentoring for yourself and your
colleagues – colleges, universities,
companies,
Mentoring for Success
getting the most from yourself & others
PATH to LOVE
Dating Agency
Mentoring for Success
getting the most from yourself & others