The gift of life is an amazing journey. What all
people have in common is their desire that life
works for them. That is, that they able to reach
their goals, make sense out of their journey, be
satisfied, and of course be happy.
The things that life throws at us often becomes
obstacles to the above desires. This study
focuses in how people face the problems of life.
Part 1
Victimization
The epidemic
of our culture
Victimization is a perspective of life that
one’s world is a result of what happens to
you. Furthermore, that one’s pain or good
fortune is controlled by forces beyond
one’s self. It is anti-personal responsibility
and pro-blaming everyone or everything
else for one’s current situation.
I turn on the tube and what do I see
A whole lotta people cryin' "Don't blame me"
They point their crooked little fingers at everybody
else
Spend all their time feelin' sorry for themselves
Victim of this, victim of that
Your momma's too thin; your daddy's too fat
Get over it
Get over it
All this whinin' and cryin' and pitchin' a fit
Get over it, get over it
A word picture of
this mental outlook
of life is that of a
person’s world being
equated to a car
with them being in
the passenger seat
and no one behind
the steering wheel.
The millennial generation
have been conditioned
into living life passively.
They believe their lives
are beyond their control
and believe that they are
owed the good life rather
than making the good
life.
Me – me – me
 Frustration
 Blame game
 I am owed (self-entitlement)
 My problems in life are caused by others
 I want it right now!
 Life isn’t fair
 Won’t forgive

The Enabler
An enabler is one who runs to
the rescue removing the
consequences of one’s actions
from those he or she loves.
These consequences are
meant to teach responsibility
but the enabler prolongs the
maturation process.
Oh by the way, God the
Father is not an enabler.
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Parents doing homework for their children
rather than giving direction
Calling the spouse’s work saying he or she is
sick when the truth is they are intoxicated
Bailing adult children out financially over and
over
Making excuses for dysfunctional behavior of
loved ones
Not exercising boundaries for bad behavior of
others
Part 2
Personal
Responsibility
Acting like a
grown up
Dr. Phil and others like
him have made
careers out of the
simplicity of teaching
personal responsibility
on national television.
It is as though it is
some new
revolutionary idea.
Personal responsibility understands that there are
events and circumstances beyond one’s control.
Yet the individual still has a tremendous impact by
their actions or lack of action as to how their life
unfolds. So if victimization can be defined as
passivity one exercises toward ones life
circumstances, then PR on the other hand, sees
life not so much as the hand one is dealt but rather
as the way one plays his or her hand.
Life isn’t that what happens to you, but rather
what you do to the life that comes to you.
So if victimization
refuses to get behind
the steering wheel of
one’s life, then
personal responsibility
is just the opposite. It
jumps into the driver’s
seat and controls the
direction of one’s life.
Hi, my name is Joe
and I am an
alcoholic.
This understanding
is not just for
alcoholics but is a
Biblical principle for
all our shortcomings.
I John 1.9
Part 3
My life is the
world I have
created
Hi my name is Pat
and my life
circumstances are
those I have created
My life is the world I
have created. The
decisions I have
made, my choice of
friends, my work
ethic, my worldview,
my passion for living
the life I want, all play
into who I am today.

Is it possible that a mature man or women
who is very personal responsibility based in
many areas of their lives, such as providing
for themselves and their family and taking
action when difficult events occur in their
lives, are victims when it comes to personal
relationships?
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Answer: Yes
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Often those in bad marriages blame their
spouse forgetting that they chose their mate
and their contribution to the mess.
Those who hate their job were not forced to
take that position.
Many who have poor health refuse to
exercise and change their diet and life style.
Many with broken relationships sit passively
by and watch the relationship sink rather
than actively trying to resolve issues.
Is to get the one who
feels that they are the
innocent party
(victimization) to see
their role in the marital
conflict.
Oh by the way, 99% of
the time both parties
see themselves as the
good guy in the
marriage.
On the subject of taking control and
responsibility of one’s life, Joel Osteen wrote
the book, Your Best Life Now in 2004 and it
ended up on the New York Times Bestselling
list.
Joel Osteen is the high profile senior pastor of
Lakewood Church, Houston, TX, the largest
church in America with 43,500 weekly
attenders.
1. Forget the barriers of the past, and dream
big. Enlarge your vision.
2. Remember to keep a can-do, positive
mindset. When faced with a challenge this
week, focus on the solution rather than the
problem.
3. Be choosy about the thoughts you focus on.
4. Your past doesn’t determine your future.
What one action will you take today to move
you toward the life you want?
5. Don’t let anything make you give up.
Post pictures and journal about your goals
to keep them at the forefront of your
mind.
6. Take time to be kind and give to others.
Whose life can you improve today?
7. Choose to be happy.
There is nothing wrong with the seven points
he makes. But it is not what he says that should
concern us, but rather what he doesn’t say.
2. Most anyone of any religious or philosophical
persuasion could agree with him, hence there is
nothing in his book which is uniquely Christian.
3. As pastor of the largest church in America and
hence a major voice for God, Osteen should
quit his job and become a motivational speaker
and leave God out of it.
1.
Part 4
God’s Gift of a
Victorious Life
Taking personal
responsibility to a
supernatural level
You are a Super
Conqueror!
But in all these
things we
overwhelmingly
conquer through
Him who loved us.
Romans 8
37
The two words, overwhelmingly conquer, is one
word in Greek with a prefix. It is hupernikáō
(ὑπερνικάω).
“Nike” means to be victorious, to be a
conqueror, to overcome, and to overpower and
prevail.
The prefix “huper” does to a word what “2” does
when you square a number. It makes the word
more intense, hence we get super-conqueror!
1.
2.
3.
4.
He has blessed us with every spiritual
blessing including forgiveness and
righteousness (which are just two of the
Fifty Blessings) – Ephesians 1.3
Indwelt us with His Spirit who empowers us
to live the Christian life – Romans 8.9
Given us the Bible which is both a map and
instruction manual on how to live life –
Hebrews 4.12
Works all the events of our lives for good –
Romans 8.28
5.
6.
7.
8.
Provided help and access to God’s throne
room through prayer – Hebrews 4.16
Given us the family of God to encourage us
and help us on our life’s journey – Hebrews
10.24-25
Given us a spirit of courage, power, love and
discipline – II Timothy 1.7
Provided the full armor of God to fight life’s
battles – Ephesians 6
So if victimization is
no one behind the
steering wheel, and
PR is you behind the
wheel, then what is
the Biblical picture
for the Christian?
Answer: Pilot and Copilot relationship
So then, my beloved, just as you
have always obeyed, not as in my
presence only, but now much more
in my absence, work out your
salvation with fear and trembling;
Philippians 2
12
for it is God who is at work in
you, both to will and to work for
His good pleasure. Philippians 2
13
It is both God and you behind
the steering wheels of your life
So if we establish that God and the
believer are both pilots over your life,
which is the true Biblical picture?
God is the pilot and you are the co-pilot
-OrYou are the pilot and God is co-pilot
We see that God has given us tremendous
control over the direction of our lives while
simultaneously working His will in our lives.
I believe the best picture is that of the believer
being the pilot while God is the master
instructor being in the co-pilot’s seat. He is
able at any moment to take over control. But it
is our lives to live and our choices.