Taking Responsibility
Creating a Life That Works
Workbook
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How Do You Create Your Story?
Above or Below the Line
Choosing to take ownership, to be responsible and
accountable can be difficult. When you choose to live
above the line, life is much easier, free and fun.
Responsibility is a choice, not aburden. In every moment
of every day, you can choose how you respond to
situations. You can choose the values andideals to
which you hold yourself accountable to.
When you and others go below the line, we fall into
the trap of blame, excuses, justification and denial
and give upcontrol or choice. We say things like, “I
have no choice,” “That’s the way it is,” “The problem is my
partner and I can’t change them.”
Becoming angry and resentful and feeling powerless is common when
weblame others for our problems.
You are a victim when you are below the line. Stuff just “happens” to you. Victims
keep the badthing that happened alive by talking about it at every opportunity and
getting sympathy and “Oh poor little you that was really very unfair.”
If you or someone you know lives their lives below the line, this statement will likely
upset them and they will argue and give examples of how this not true.
“You're only a victim once. Every other time you are a willing participant.”
Jim Edwards
On the other hand, if you live above the line this statement will make perfect sense
and you will agree with it.
In this box below write down the most common stories you hear from those
around you. (Here’s a hint: The excuses or stories that upset you the most)
Below The Line B.E.D.
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Blame
You are blaming when:
• When asked why you didn’t do something the
first word out of your mouth is 'You...'
• Problemsare someone else's fault and not yours.
Example: How come the lights were left on all
night? Well you didn’t turn them off last week.
Excuses / Justifications
You make excuses or justify when:
• “But.....(insert your story here)”
word BUT negates everything that is said before it.
Example: I agree with you BUT… This means you don’t agree with me.
The
• “.....BECAUSE ......(insert the story here)” When BECAUSE is used you are in for a
story about why and often its excuses and justifications.
Example: I was late this morning BECAUSE…
• You embellish and tell your story to find people to listen and agree with you.
What are your “poor me” stories? How do you embellish and maintain them?
Denial
You are in denial when:
• You are unwilling to see WHAT IS REALLY HAPPENING
• You refuse to face reality
• You pretend something is not happening
What do you pretend? What is it costing you!
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Living Above “The Line”
When you choose to live your life above the line – no matter how hard that may be –
you will be freed up to reinvent yourself, create a vision and then go for it.
Powerful questions you can ask yourself when things are not working:
• Who or what am I looking to blame here?
• What excuses am I making?
• What justifications and stories am I making up to let me off the hook?
• What am I in denial about and what is really happening here?
These questions are not easy because they will automatically expose your Below
The Line Behaviour
Below The Line
What three areas of your life are below the line?
Above the Line O.R.A.
Ownership
Ownership is the ability to own your part.
You see how you could have been part
or caused asituation.
Responsibility
Responsibility is the ability to respond what is happening.
It means that you have the choiceto respond in a different way to your
circumstances. Our inaction keeps us stuck andconfused.
Accountability
This is the ability to account for or be held accountable. Holding people to
agreements is oneof the most important areas of development for leaders. To
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change the
language of
anorganisation, it's important to give people the capability of holding others to
account. Can youlet your people hold you to account? Can you hold others to
account?
Assertive Behaviour Comes From Living
Above The Line
Many people confuse being assertive
with the below the line behaviours of
Passive/Aggressive and Aggressive
Being truly assertive keeps you above
the line. Being passive, aggressive, or
passive/aggressivekeeps you in B.E.D.
with blame, excuses, justifications and
denial!
Inaction and procrastination keeps us stuck
and confused. When we take responsibility and
move into action,we gain insight and clarity.
Taking responsibility allows you tolearn from your
mistakes and experiences.
Staying Above the Line
• Moment by moment, you will move above and below the line.
• As you consistently choose to be responsible, it’s easier to stay above the line.
• It's not a problem that we go below the line because we all do it. The big question is
how fast can you recognise it and choose to move above “The Line” and stay
there.Only byowning your actions can you change your world.
No one can make you do it and the choice is yours.
How To Improve Your Responsibility Accountability.
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Listen to what others are saying before you add your bit
Don’t gossip about other people
Do your tasks in a timely manner and if you need more time ask before the
deadline
Turn up on time to every meeting and appointment
Refuse to co-operate with people who throw tantrums
Stop telling wonderful stories about why you didn’t do something
Be your word. Only make agreements you willing to keep..
If you are late, apologise and “Shut Up.” The only person interested in your
below “The Line” story is you. If they want to know where you where or what
happened they will ask.
Turn up for work bright and fresh every day
Responsible people don’t quit, they find a way to get the job done
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If you have a question then provide a solution or a number of alternatives
When things go wrong, reflect on what you have learned rather than who to
blame and why it happened.
Own Who You Are
When you're above the line:
• You discover who you are and what you are made of
• You take responsibility and demonstrate it in all your actions.
• You live in the present moment rather than the past and will clearly see your
impact on what is going on around you.
When we own who we are, we free ourselves and everyone around us. When
you're living below “The Line” it impacts every relationship and everything you
do.
Choose responsibility or chooseblame, it's your choice!
Remember!
Taking ownership of your response gives you the power to change yourlife!
Congratulations!
Thank you for taking the time to learn about taking responsibility and living a life that
worksabove the line.
As Mahatma Ghandi said, “You must be the change you want to see in the world”.
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