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Series: For The Win
SUMMARY
(paste the following into your channel “Summary” section. This only needs to be updated once per
series)
For The Win – Series Overview
Winning is fun, isn’t it? No one ever starts a basketball game hoping to lose. We don’t go to band practice
because we want to take last place in our competition. We don’t start a video game wanting our character to be
elliminated first. No way. We play to win. Why? Because winning is awesome. It feels great. In fact, sports and
video games probably aren’t the only place you want to be a winner. Do you want to be successful when it comes
to school? Sure! How about money? Your future? Dating? You probably answered “all of the above”. Basically we
all want to win at life. And while there’s no way to guarantee you will win in every area, there are some things you
can do to help you get there. In fact, there’s an entire book in the Bible, the book of Proverbs, dedicated to giving
solid advice that can help us win at life. During this series, we’ll take a look at five verses from Proverbs that can
set you up for the win in the areas you care about the most.
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WEEK 1
GUIDE
(paste the following into your channel “Guide” section, to be updated weekly)
For The Win – Week 1 Small Group Questions
GOAL OF SMALL GROUP
To help students understand the power of responding to “friend drama” in a gentle way.
Create meaningful conversation. Adjust questions as needed, and don’t feel like you need to answer all of them.
1. What’s one area where you felt like a “winner” this week?
2. Name one thing that can stir up drama in friendships.
3. When you have drama or conflict with your friends, how do you typically respond:
 Sarcasm?
 Brutal honesty?
 Social media?
 Isolate yourself?
4. Why does a gentle answer turn away wrath?
5. Give an example of a time when someone else’s response in conflict helped you appreciate them more.
6. Which of the following do you need to work on when you encounter conflict or drama in your friendships:
 Refuse to participate in the drama?
 Refuse to use negative body language?
 Change your tone when you talk?
7. What’s the #1 thing that will keep you from doing this?
NEXT STEP:
Leaders, at some point this week, remind your students of this big idea: when it comes to drama with your
friends, a gentle response > a harsh response.
DEVO
(paste the following into your channel “Devo” section, to be updated weekly)
Devotional for Small Group Leaders
Have you ever heard the phrase, “For the Win?” A Game Show host will say it before the contestant answers the
winning answer; A Sports Announcer will say it after an exciting finish; Sometimes we will say it when we play a
game of pick-up basketball in the driveway. But it’s not just about winning a game, we all want to win at life, too.
But how can we set ourselves up for the win in the everyday areas of our lives? And what does the Bible have to
say about that?
Take friendships for example. It’s inevitable that, in our interactions with others, we will find ourselves in a
disagreement of some sort. And if we were to be honest with ourselves, sometimes our responses are sarcastic,
harsh, embarrassing, or just plain mean. Unfortunately, those responses only end up making the situation worse.
But is there an alternative?
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King Solomon, known to be the wisest man to ever live, says in Proverbs, A gentle answer turns away wrath, but
a harsh word stirs up anger (Proverbs 15:1). When we find ourselves in a disagreement with someone, and we
want to respond harshly, Solomon reminds us that our harshness will only make things worse. Gentleness is
greater than harshness.
So the next time you find yourself in an argument with someone, choose to be gentle and kind, and just see if that
doesn’t help diffuse the situation.
Overview
(paste the following into your channel “Overview” section, to be updated each week)
For The Win – Week 1
Session Title: Whitewater Rafting
Bottom Line: Gentle > Harsh.
SUMMARY
Have you ever been whitewater rafting? It’s a blast. You jump in a boat with your friends and make your way
down a river, laughing and splashing along the way. But there’s also something terrifying that can happen—
rapids. There are places in every river where something stirs up the water and if you aren’t careful, you and your
friends can be headed for disaster. You don’t have to be in a boat to feel that way with your friends. Maybe this
sounds familiar. Things are going fine. Everyone is happy. Then your friendship hits some rapids. There’s drama.
And if we aren’t careful, sometimes our responses create more problems than before. But what else can we do?
King Solomon, the author of Proverbs, tells us we have another option when it comes to conflict with those closest
to us. And while his words don’t guarantee we’ll never see rapids in our friendships, they do help us steer around
them and find our way to calmer waters.
Image
(please find the higher res instagram bottom line image in the “Graphic Support” section, to be updated
each week)
News
(paste the following into your channel “News” section, to be updated each week)
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Hi Leaders – We’re starting a new series this week called For The Win. This week, we’ll look at some advice from
King Solomon on how to handle turbulence in our relationships. If you’ve ever been on white water, get your
stories ready for small group this week. See you soon!
Series Preview for For The Win:
http://vimeo.com/xp3students/forthewin
This Guy…For The Win
https://youtu.be/zYnA9s4dsZM
Stories:
Anytime you have a win with your small group, not only would we love to hear it, but you can also share it with an
online community of small group leaders – leaders who do what you do every week – at leadsmall.org. Just click
here: http://leadsmall.org/submit/?age_group=56
WEEK 2
GUIDE
(paste the following into your channel “Guide” section, to be updated weekly)
For The Win – Week 2 Small Group Questions
GOAL OF SMALL GROUP
To help students understand that God and work are connected; and to encourage them to make a work
plan in one area of their lives.
Create meaningful conversation. Adjust questions as needed, and don’t feel like you need to answer all of them.
Name something you need to do right now, but instead you’re procrastinating.
What distracts you from following through on things you say you’re going to do?
What are some benefits of hard work?
What’s the difference between viewing work as a source of guilt or a gift from God?
What would you do differently if you decided that anything you work on is done “in the name of the Lord
Jesus”?
6. What is one thing you want to accomplish that would require hard work for you to do it?
7. If you were to make a plan to accomplish this goal, what would be the first practical step?
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
NEXT STEP:
Leaders, at some point this week, connect with your students and help them work through the practical step they
mentioned in response to question #7.
DEVO
(paste the following into your channel “Devo” section, to be updated weekly)
Devotional for Small Group Leaders
What was your last New Year’s resolution? Did you keep it all year? If you are like the majority of people, your
answer is “not even close”. Why is it so hard for us to follow through with what we say we will do—even when our
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intentions are good? Why are we so easily distracted, forgetful, and content with “just doing it later”?
In the book of Proverbs, King Solomon says, All hard work brings profit, but mere talk leads only to poverty
(Proverbs 14:23). What Solomon is saying is that a simple declaration that we will do something is not enough.
Just making the resolution is not enough. We actually have to create a plan, and then choose to do it. Doing gets
us where talking won’t.
Paul takes it one step further, reminding us whatever you do, whether in word or in deed, do it all in the name of
the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him (Colossians 3:17). As believers, when we do
anything, we are called to do it with Jesus in mind. Make Jesus look good. Be a person of your word, and a
person whose reputation about their work precedes them. This isn’t just to make us look better, but because we
are representatives of Jesus and have a responsibility to represent Him well.
So today, think through the things you want to accomplish, imagine the end you want, and make a plan to make it
happen. After all, doing gets us where talking won’t.
Overview
(paste the following into your channel “Overview” section, to be updated each week)
For The Win – Week 2
Session Title: “I’m Gonna”
Bottom Line: Doing takes you where talking won’t.
SUMMARY
We all love to talk about what we’re going to do. Maybe you plan to get your grades up or make varsity this year.
Maybe you’re going to finally clean out your room or finish the history paper that’s still sitting on your desk. The
problem is that when it comes to our future, there’s a big difference between wanting to do something and actually
doing it. We can all think of one or two things we have been wanting to accomplish but can’t quite seem to get to
the finish line. It’s not that we’re lazy or bad people. We just have a lot going on, and it’s easy to get distracted.
Add a few of those unfinished projects together and it starts to feel overwhelming. We’re even less motivated to
get started. It’s a cycle. Maybe that’s why the book of Proverbs gives us some good advice making sure the
things we want to do actually happen. Through the wise words of King Solomon, we find that, though it won’t be
easy, the key to reaching our goals may be as simple as taking one step at a time.
Image
(please find the higher res instagram bottom line image in the “Graphic Support” section, to be updated
each week)
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News
(paste the following into your channel “News” section, to be updated each week)
Hello Amazing Leaders – In the second week of For The Win, we’re exploring more of the wisdom of Solomon
shares in his Proverbs. This time, we’re talking about…not just talking about…but finishing the things we want to
accomplish. Have a great week!
Series Preview for For The Win:
http://vimeo.com/xp3students/forthewin
Ralph… For The Win
Without ambition one starts nothing. Without work one finishes nothing. The prize will not be sent to you. You
have to win it. ― Ralph Waldo Emerson
Stories:
Anytime you have a win with your small group, not only would we love to hear it, but you can also share it with an
online community of small group leaders – leaders who do what you do every week – at leadsmall.org. Just click
here: http://leadsmall.org/submit/?age_group=56
WEEK 3
GUIDE
(paste the following into your channel “Guide” section, to be updated weekly)
For The Win – Week 3 Small Group Questions
GOAL OF SMALL GROUP
To help students understand what it means to guard their own heart; and to encourage them to guard the
heart of people they are dating (or will date in the future).
Create meaningful conversation. Adjust questions as needed, and don’t feel like you need to answer all of them.
What’s the best piece of dating advice you ever got?
How do you think some of the people around you would define “winning” when it comes to dating?
Dating is tough for everybody. Name one way it can be challenging.
Proverbs 4:23 says, Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it. When Solomon
says “your heart,” what are some things he’s referring to?
5. Define what it means to “guard your heart” (whether you’re dating someone or not).
6. In which area do you need to improve most when it comes to guarding your heart:
 Keeping control of your mind and body?
 Remembering your worth and your value?
 Pacing yourself and slowing down the relationship?
7. What does it look like to guard someone else’s heart?
1.
2.
3.
4.
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NEXT STEP:
Leaders, regardless of whether or not your students are dating, they need to be reminded of how valuable they
are. At some point this week, text them: You are made in the image of God. He values you. This week, treat
yourself (and others) that way.
DEVO
(paste the following into your channel “Devo” section, to be updated weekly)
Devotional for Small Group Leaders
We all want to win at life. We want to win in business, friendships, finances etc. And maybe one of the
most important areas we want to win in, is in our relationships. If we are married, we want our
marriages to succeed, and if we are single, we want our relationships and future relationships to
succeed. Either way, King Solomon gives some great advice as to how we can win in the area of
relationships.
He says, Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it (Proverbs 4:23 NIV). The
word Solomon uses for heart refers to the inner part of us, our conscience, the part of us responsible
for our emotions and desires. And Solomon says this part of us is the source of our lives. This part of us
steers us and directs us. Our heart is responsible for the decisions we make and the ways we
behave—which means that guarding our heart must be a priority.
Guarding your heart can look differently based on what season of life we are in and what’s going on
around us relationally. If we are married, guarding our heart means not letting ourselves become too
emotionally attached to someone other than our spouse. If we are single, it can mean guarding our
heart from becoming involved in a relationship that we know is not healthy for us.
Our heart is our well-spring of life, and since it affects everything about us, we need to choose to guard
it. After all, everything gets its start from our heart.
Overview
(paste the following into your channel “Overview” section, to be updated each week)
For The Win – Week 3
Session Title: Bad Date
Bottom Line: Everything gets its start from your heart.
SUMMARY
Nobody wants to be bad at dating. In fact, most of us would say we want to be good at it. You want to be
successful when it comes to hanging out with people you’re romantically interested in. You want to be impressive
to the people you have a crush on. Basically, you want to win. But it isn’t exactly easy, is it? Dating can be
confusing, intimidating, and even painful at times. Nobody is sure they’re handling it the right way. The book of
Proverbs offers advice to help you live well in every area—and that includes your relationships. And while it can’t
tell you whether you’ll run into your crush this weekend, it can help you figure out how to go for the win in your
dating life now and in the future.
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Image
(please find the higher res instagram bottom line image in the “Graphic Support” section, to be updated
each week)
News
(paste the following into your channel “News” section, to be updated each week)
Hey Everyone – Solomon is back with another Proverb in the third week of For The Win. This week, we want to
help our students live well in their dating lives. Whether they admit it or not, students are interested in
dating…hopefully this means good discussion. Enjoy your week!
Series Preview for For The Win:
http://vimeo.com/xp3students/forthewin
One Liner… For The Win
It’s not you, it's me...
Stories:
Anytime you have a win with your small group, not only would we love to hear it, but you can also share it with an
online community of small group leaders – leaders who do what you do every week – at leadsmall.org. Just click
here: http://leadsmall.org/submit/?age_group=56
WEEK 4
GUIDE
(paste the following into your channel “Guide” section, to be updated weekly)
For The Win – Week 4 Small Group Questions
GOAL OF SMALL GROUP
To help students understand that a generous life is much happier (and much more attractive) than a
selfish life.
Create meaningful conversation. Adjust questions as needed, and don’t feel like you need to answer all of them.
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1. What is something you wanted for a long time and eventually got? How did it make you feel? How long
did that feeling last?
2. Do you agree that the more we get, the more we want? Why or why not?
3. In what ways does being generous make you nervous or uncomfortable?
4. How have you seen being generous with money, stuff, and time make life better?
5. What are some of the qualities you like about generous people?
6. Where do you have EXTRA:
a. Stuff?
b. Time?
c. Money?
d. Talent?
7. Based on your answer to question #6, name a person or place where you could donate generously this
week.
NEXT STEP:
Leaders, at some point this week, check in with your students and remind them to follow through on their
generosity.
DEVO
(paste the following into your channel “Devo” section, to be updated weekly)
Devotional for Small Group Leaders
Have you ever felt incredibly hungry, like starving? Maybe you hiked a trail all day, and when you finished, you
thought you could eat anything and everything you see. However, after you ate your fill, did you ever get hungry
again? Of course you did. Hunger is an appetite, and appetites can never be fully satisfied.
Likewise, our desire for more “stuff” is an appetite—one that never gets fully filled. The more we get, the more we
want… which leads us to feel dissatisfied and often times ungrateful for what we have. So what do we do to make
sure that we don’t find ourselves miserable from always wanting more?
In the book of Proverbs, King Solomon tells us that there is a way for us to prosper. There’s a way for us to go for
the win when it comes to our desire for more: A generous man will prosper; he who refreshes others will himself
be refreshed (Proverbs 11:25 NIV). Sounds backwards, doesn’t it? There’s a way for us to prosper (or be “full”)
that happens not by getting more, but by giving more. Why? Because a generous person is someone who looks
at what they have not as a means to make them happy, but as a means to make other people happy. Also, the
side effect for generosity is refreshment. When we take our desire for more and point it toward others, we get
refreshed.
So, the next time you find yourself wanting more, consider giving more instead. Bottom line is, generosity gets
you what selfishness never will.
Overview
(paste the following into your channel “Overview” section, to be updated each week)
For The Win – Week 4
Session Title: Give Me More
Bottom Line: Generosity gets you what selfishness never will.
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SUMMARY
Would you like to upgrade your phone? Of course you would! What about your wardrobe? How about a better car
or a bigger house? Chances are you said yes to all the above. We all love to get more and better stuff. And, after
the first upgrade, we usually want another. One dose of “more” always leads us to want another. It’s normal. But
sometimes our normal way of doing things has unintended side effects. In this case, our quest for more can keep
us dissatisfied and make us miserable. Maybe that’s why King Solomon, who had more riches and more
upgrades than we can imagine, gives us such clear advice when it comes to this area of our lives. Through his
words we discover that giving, not getting, is how we go for the win when in our endless desire for more.
Image
(please find the higher res instagram bottom line image in the “Graphic Support” section, to be updated
each week)
News
(paste the following into your channel “News” section, to be updated each week)
Hey Leaders – It’s week four of For The Win. We have a great opportunity to discuss generosity this week. The
bottom line this week says it all: Generosity gets you what selfishness never will. As you approach this week,
think of a time you extended generosity – and remember how it made you feel. Looking forward to seeing you
this week!
Series Preview for For The Win:
http://vimeo.com/xp3students/forthewin
‘Nuff said
For it is in giving that we receive.
― Francis of Assisi
Stories:
Anytime you have a win with your small group, not only would we love to hear it, but you can also share it with an
online community of small group leaders – leaders who do what you do every week – at leadsmall.org. Just click
here: http://leadsmall.org/submit/?age_group=56
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WEEK 5
GUIDE
(paste the following into your channel “Guide” section, to be updated weekly)
For The Win – Week 5 Small Group Questions
GOAL OF SMALL GROUP
To help students understand that patience can make their lives richer and their family relationships
better.
Create meaningful conversation. Adjust questions as needed, and don’t feel like you need to answer all of them.
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
Why is it so challenging to be patient with members of your family?
What do you typically do when you feel impatient?
How does knowing someone else’s side of the story help you stay patient with them?
List two reasons why it’s nice to be around a patient person.
How does impatience make your life harder? How does patience make your life better?
Who is one person in your family that you need to be more patient with?
To develop more patience with that person, which of the following will you commit to practicing:
 Asking for wisdom?
 Watching your tongue?
 Asking yourself if it will be a big deal two hours from now?
 Remembering all the ways God has been patient with you?
NEXT STEP:
Leaders, as a follow up to the entire series, encourage your group to read Proverbs over the next month (even if
it’s just one verse every couple of days). Close group time by praying that your students will have a lot of wisdom
in their lives.
DEVO
(paste the following into your channel “Devo” section, to be updated weekly)
Devotional for Small Group Leaders
Patience. Now there is a word that can bring tension to any conversation. “Be patient while you wait.” “Be patient
when you drive.” “Be patient with your brother.” But why is it so hard for us to be patient—especially when dealing
with our family? There’s just something about our family that seems to take what little patience we have and pours
it down the drain. Our interactions could be categorized more as impatient rather than patient. However, King
Solomon has some wise advice that can help us be more patient with those we love the most.
A person’s wisdom yields patience; it is to one’s glory to overlook an offense (Proverbs 19:11 NIV).
In this Proverb, Solomon is reminding us that a person’s wisdom leads to patience. It takes wisdom to seek to
understand a situation and see beyond the immediate circumstances. Looking beyond the current situation allows
for a calmer attitude and ultimately to be a more patient person. Solomon concludes the Proverb by telling us it is
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to our benefit to overlook an offense. We can choose to not focus on the other person’s wrong-doing but to move
past it.
So what can we do today to become more patient with those we love? We can ask for wisdom, and we can watch
what we say. We can choose to seek to understand the situation fully, and we can give that person the benefit of
the doubt when they offend us.
Overview
(paste the following into your channel “Overview” section, to be updated each week)
For The Win – Week 5
Session Title: It’s A Small World
Bottom Line: Where impatience makes you world smaller, patience makes it bigger.
SUMMARY
Some people just get on your nerves more than others, don’t they? Whether they’re constantly late, always
talking, totally irresponsible or just plain annoying, we all have someone in our lives who drives us crazy. And
most often—that person is in our family. So what do you do when the person who frustrates you the most lives in
your own house? How do you cope when everything they do makes you lose your patience with them? Patience
is something King Solomon talked about often in the book of Proverbs. And thankfully he doesn’t say, “just try
harder” when it comes to those who get on your nerves. Instead, he gives us a clue into one surprising thing that
can grow our patience in any situation. And if we’re willing to give it a try, we may just find it easier to go for the
win with our families.
Image
(please find the higher res instagram bottom line image in the “Graphic Support” section, to be updated
each week)
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News
(paste the following into your channel “News” section, to be updated each week)
Here we go! Hi fantastic leaders – this week we’re finishing our Proverbs series, For The Win. This week we’ll
see what Solomon has to say about patience…something few teenagers have. In his book, The Power of Habit,
Charles Duhigg suggests the ability to exercise patience is the greatest determining factor of later life success for
adolescents. True or not, patience is powerful. Enjoy the last week of For The Win!
Series Preview for For The Win:
http://vimeo.com/xp3students/forthewin
Simple truth
Patience is bitter, but its fruit is sweet. ― Aristotle
Stories:
Anytime you have a win with your small group, not only would we love to hear it, but you can also share it with an
online community of small group leaders – leaders who do what you do every week – at leadsmall.org. Just click
here: http://leadsmall.org/submit/?age_group=56
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