Your wedding at Sts. Martha & Mary
Congratulations! What a time for you! There are so many decisions to make, so many things to do…
It is our hope that our meetings will be a break from the chaos around you!
When you call
You may have a date in mind and very anxious to be sure the date is available, but we need to sit down
with both you to begin the process. Please don’t have Mom call or just check on dates- we take this stuff as
seriously as you do. Before we begin to set dates or times, you both need to chat with a priest or deacon
and get some paperwork done.
Our first meeting…
This is the getting to know you part of our journey, as we fill out what are called the Preliminary
Interrogatory form, what we like to call the Green Sheets. The questions we ask will help us figure out
what additional paperwork we need to accomplish the task of preparing you for marriage and all that.
Some answers will lead us to what we call impediments; but don’t be put off by the word; they are simply
issues that we need to address right off the bat and take care of. Some impediments refer to cases such as
the bride or groom not being Catholic or such. A brief form with an affirmation of faith- agreed to by the
Catholic member only- sent to the Archdiocese for approval is all that will probably be needed here. We
will meet with you later on, as we head toward the date, to help plan your mass or ceremony!
Pre-Cana classes…
This is essential for your preparation. Don’t worry about this being some boring session with some old
priest going on and on for hours about blah, blah, blah. This is an opportunity to talk about issues of
marriage and life together led by married couples who will speak about their relationship and how they
find God in it. There are classes all over the area, just call the contact person (very early- lots of people
want to get married every year!) and they’ll set you up. For the classes, log on to rcab.org and scroll down
under “Catholic Life” to Marriage Preparation classes. Call the contact listed under the time and place
convenient for you.
Another parish?
Perhaps you grew up in a parish that has closed. You are welcome here at Sts. Martha & Mary- let us
help prepare you as best we can- we are sure that you will find a great community. Perhaps you belong to
another parish and wish to be married here. You may find us asking a few questions about why you’re
here- it’s not that we don’t want you to be married here- it’s key for us (and you guys) that we clarify the
correct reasons, and follow protocol. It’s very important, if it’s at all possible, that you marry in the church
you call your own or plan to make your own.
We may ask for a letter of permission from the pastor of your parish. Perhaps you have a priest or
deacon you would prefer to do the honors- we’re delighted to accommodate, as long as we are clear on
who is doing the preparation. If you are out of state, we still can find a way; a priest or deacon in the
parish where you reside can prepare you for your wedding and send us the information (do him a favor
and send him in a thank you note, if you know what I mean). Keep us updated on when you’ll be in townwe’ll need to meet with you before the big day and make sure our stuff is in order.
The hills are alive….
We are blessed with very talented musicians in our parish, led by our director, Henry Rondelli. He can
be reached at (774) 766-1477. He’s a very nice and talented person. Keeping this in mind, regardless of
your decision to utilize their talents or bring in your own folks, he is to be paid by you guys, for this is his
work. Please contact him ASAP to meet to discuss music. The fee is $300 for both singer and organist.
Some people have a favorite song that they’d like to use at their wedding- well, some music is… well,
hmm… inappropriate for a sacred ceremony such as this. Let Henry guide you through the music selection
process. You may be surprised at the options!
Now, a word from our sponsor….
The offering for Sts. Martha & Mary parishioners is $200; for non-parishioners, $300. If you’d also like
to make a donation to the priest and/or deacon who is officiating, he won’t be offended- he may even
appreciate it!
You ought to be in pictures….
Still and video photographers are welcome, but it is VERY important that they speak to the priest or
deacon BEFORE the ceremony. It helps A LOT if the photographer is familiar with the Catholic
wedding, knowing when, how, where and why to keep a respectful distance, not blocking the view of the
groom, please. Please encourage your guests not to take their own pictures; it can be VERY distracting.
Flower folks would be wise to contact the church before their arrival, to get our signals straight.
Bring these to the rehearsal: Marriage License, offering for the church, and the unity candle
(optional). After the ceremony, get someone to take the candle and help clean up - every church has a few
candles, boxes, bows, etc. left behind.
Make sure to get family & friends in on this- as readers (make sure they get the readings nice and early),
gift bearers, servers, Eucharistic ministers, even musicians- with Henry’s help, of course. Every family has
its share of hams- the more involved, the more memories, the happier for everyone! Please get children
involved- they’re not only fun to watch, they make everything all the more memorable.
Altar Servers, though not necessary, can add a touch of grace to a wedding and help the priest or
deacon, especially if he is a guest. We have several very capable servers- we can arrange to have them serveplease don’t forget to give them a donation in thanks for their service.
If you have a favorite text that isn’t from the Bible that you’d like to have read, or a symbol you’d like to
use, please tell the priest or deacon early on. We’re good guys, but we do have rules to follow.
If you would like to remember the names of deceased loved ones at the wedding, please don’t be shy.
Bringing their names into the celebration won’t make everyone sad; it will give great comfort that those we
remember are thought of with love, gratitude and joy!
Every wedding party has a party animal or two. As much as we all enjoy a good time, we have a simple
request; to encourage those who tend to be well, over-enthusiastic, to remember that we are in a church
and we need to keep an atmosphere of reverence. Thank you.
The rehearsal is an important preparation for the wedding; please make sure everyone is on time for it;
it’s the way to make sure that everyone knows how to get to the church and where to go in it. Having the
readers at the rehearsal is helpful; it gives them a chance to be comfortable. It takes about 45 minutes to
run a rehearsal. Confessions after are always a good option.
The groom and his party should arrive 30 minutes before the ceremony - the bride won’t be late- will
she???
Sts. Martha & Mary Parish Family
Cranberry Catholic Collaborative
Offices: 340 Centre St
Middleboro, MA 02346
(508) 947-0444
Rev. John Sheridan, Pastor
Deacon George Gabriel
Deacon Charles Bower
Holly Clark, Pastoral Associate