Saturday Nation
Date: 21.05.2016
Page 10
Article size: 236 cm2
ColumnCM: 52.44
AVE: 107511.11
Police always win
in stupidity contest
with protesters
Disguises
mocracy, refuse to dress up in nice shirt and tie to go to work
in a 12th floor government office. Instead, they show up stark
naked and begin raiding clothing stores so that by the time
they reach the venue of their protest, they are fully dressed,
their newly stolen green hooded jackets bulging with flat­
employed
by violent
political
hooligans are
legion: they
pose as peaceful
screen television sets, and their stomachs surprised by the
presence of hastily swallowed jewelry.
Worshippers of the Lord of Poverty, Raila, choose not to
be employed. They elect not to eat lunch at high­end restau­
rants in the capital even when the hour beckons, and instead
set about destroying property, which is greater in value than
their entire lives. It is — property they will never own in their
painters in
coveralls,
complete with
red brushes,
short, miserable lives.
Disguises employed by violent political hooligans are le­
gion: they pose as peaceful painters in coveralls, complete
with red brushes, or as women waving white handkerchiefs.
or as women
waving white
handkerchiefs"
seuse versus political
hooligans in a contest of
public stupidity can only produce
one obvious victor, as protests
against the Independent Electoral
Police detection of criminals is advanced enough to cut
through the deception.
Even when they fall on the ground in a pretended dead
faint to draw police officers close so that they can steal their
cool new boots, the law sees them. Six kicks in the backside
and 10 landings of the truncheon for that. These are the peo­
ple whose genes must not be allowed to remain in the next
and Boundaries Commission have
generation.
proven.
Police do not graduate from
training school with govern­
ment­issue massage oil, powder
and a feather. They get boots,
and shields, and guns and bul­
lets. Deep tissue African massage
using truncheons, aromatic tear­
gas and a whiff of gunpowder is
their specialty.
Protesters invariably show up at
Nothing is as disrespectful to the police uniform as lying
on the ground when an officer approaches.
Other protestors flail their arms in the air in a threaten­
ing manner — calling on the lightning to strike a uniformed
police officer. The protestors' fingers are primed to rob
entrepreneurs applying for government tenders of their e­
paperwork.
Police are merciful not to shoot them on sight for sus­
pected violent robbery, which by law attracts the death
penalty. Despite the death­wish of many protestors, they are
all still alive, thanks to proportionate punishment meted out
demonstrations with stones hid­
to them.
A match­up of police mas­
den in their cheeks, turning them
over their tongues to wet them
before the deathly throw. Others
are stone and machete mules who
swallow the weapons whole in the
hope of ejecting them in time to
confront law enforcement officers.
In police lingo, they are armed
and dangerous.
Poor people who are infected
with the stupidity of following
Raila Odinga, the leader of the
Looking at the boiling bloody corpuscles streaming down
the demonstrators' faces, it is clear that they even their
plasma was anti­government. Police work for the govern­
ment. There is not a single day the pay­slip of an officer has
arrived with the Cord logo on it.
Anyone who attacks the government picks the police as an
enemy. The IEBC is government. Unless people use peace­
ful, constitutional and legal means — like writing letters to
the IEBC commissioners, or holding prayer meetings — they
have only themselves to blame when the police defend the
government.
All right­thinking people around the world have no sympa­
Coalition for Reforms and De­
Ipsos Kenya ­ Acorn House,97 James Gichuru Road ­ Lavington ­ Nairobi ­ Kenya
Saturday Nation
Date: 21.05.2016
Page 10
Article size: 236 cm2
ColumnCM: 52.44
AVE: 107511.11
thy for anarchists who use unconstitutional and illegal means
to take over government. Injuries suffered by protestors in
such environments are self­inflicted and deserve to be pun­
ished through further charges of self­endangerment.
Ipsos Kenya ­ Acorn House,97 James Gichuru Road ­ Lavington ­ Nairobi ­ Kenya