Books for Children
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Carlstrom, Nancy White; Blow Me a
Kiss, Miss Lilly
About the death of an elderly friend.
Clifton, Lucille; Everett Anderson’s
Goodbye
A young child struggle through the
stages of grief after his father’s
death.
Cohn, Janice; I Had a Friend Named
Peter
A young child’s best friend is killed
in an accident.
Fassler, John; My Grandpa Died
Today
The death of a grandfather.
Gould, Deborah; Grandpa’s Slide
Show
Family memories are important
after the death of a grandfather.
Powell, E. Sandy; Geranium Morning
A young child deals the death of his
father.
Sanford, Doris; It Must Hurt A lot
A child’s pet dies.
Stiles, Norman; I’ll Miss You Mr.
Hooper
The death of a very special Sesame
Street friend.
Wilhelm, Hans; I’ll Always Love You
A litte boy’s pet dog dies.
Varley, Susan; Badger’s Parting Gifts
Badgers friends deal with his death
Schwiebert, Pat and DeKlyen,
Chuck; Tear Soup: A Recipe for
Healing After Loss
Books for Adults
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Alderman, Linda; Why Did Daddy
Die?
helping children cope with the loss
of a parent.
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Gaffney, Donna A; The Seasons of
Grief
helping children work through loss.
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Lombardo, Victor S. and Lombardo,
Edith Foran; Kids Grieve Too
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Rofes, Eric; The Kids Book About
Death and Dying; by and for Kids
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Wass, Hannelore & Corr, Charles A;
Helping Children Cope with Death:
Guidelines and Resources
“There are no books that will do it for
us and there are no magic ‘right’
words to say. It’s the trying, the
sharing and the caring-the wanting
to help and the willingness to listenthat says, ‘I care about you.’ When
we know that we do care about each
other, then, together, we can talk
about even the most difficult times.”
~Hedda Bluestone Sharapan
Blair Primary Schools
Blair, NE
wwww.blairschools.org
Helping
Children
with Grief
Blair Community Schools
School Counseling
Children should be told what has happened
quietly, simply, and directly. Unnecessary
details should not be offered, but all
questions should be answered.
Children and
Grief
Grief is a normal and healing response
to death. Everyone experiences grief in
his or her own unique way. Young
people grieve losses as intensely as
adults. They can experience a variety of
emotions that may vary from day to
day. Children’s reactions will differ
depending on their level of emotional
development, their relationship to the
deceased, their belief system about
death, and their past experiences with
death.
Helpful Hints for
Parents of
Grieving Children
and other supportive adults play a
key role in helping their children
move through the grieving process.
to
the
right
are
some
suggestions and information that
may be helpful to you as you support
your child:
Listen to your child. If your child remains
silent, it’s okay to remind them that
expressing their feelings is okay; example,
“I’m sad.” Or “I’m scared.” Remember there is
no one correct response.
Reassure your child that his or her feelings
are normal and keep in mind he or she may
not be experiencing the same feelings as you
regarding the loss.
The grief can be a difficult process but also is
a healing process, so try not to minimize the
loss or attempt to take away the pain of the
child.
When a tragedy happens, parents
Listed
Parents should not be afraid to speak about
feelings and emotions. If this is difficult try
this, “I know what has happened and I know
it might be hard for you. It is important that
we talk so I know you are going to be okay.”
Use clear language such as, “Died, death,
dead.” Children can become confused by
terms such as “went to sleep forever” or
“passed away.”
If children wish to merely sit, their wishes
should be respected.
Children usually grieve in small time
segments. They take breaks to play or do
other typical childhood activities.
Keeping a consistent schedule and routine as
close to normal as possible helps reassure
children of safety and security as they work
through grief. Also providing structure and
setting reasonable limits helps provide
feelings of security.
Look for trouble signs: “Will someone else
die?”, poor sleeping or eating habits, etc.
Listen for safety concerns.
Touching and holding a child can do more
than words to relay a parent’s message.
Talk with children about safety rules and
how to keep safe.
If your child will be attending some sort of
memorial service, discuss the service before
the child attends to help them understand
what the service might be like. Plan for a
caring adult to attend the service with the
child.
Remember, if you need additional help, talk
with someone. You may choose to contact a
relative, counselor, teacher, principal,
pastor, or someone you trust.
The single most
important message to
relay to children is that
they are not alone and
you are with them.