Collaborate with children about their
interests
Consult children using a range of
communication forms
Positive communication
Interaction is a two-way process which values the input, feelings and intentions of both
parties. As a person involved in the development of young children, your responsibility is to
ensure each child and family is effectively included and valued in every possible way.
Modelling good communication skills and empowering children with the ability to make
decisions and resolve conflicts will help children form positive relationships and manage their
own behaviour.
To communicate successfully, children need to have the opportunity to explore their thoughts,
opinions and feelings, in a shared interaction with another person.
If communication is positive, children will feel valued by others and this will impact on the way
the children think about themselves. These opportunities will help develop positive selfconcept and self-esteem. Another important outcome of positive communication is that
children will begin to model their behaviour on the behaviour displayed by those around them.
The importance of the way carers communicate with children cannot be under-estimated. It is
a vital part in ensuring that:
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children have positive care experiences
their daily needs are met
the atmosphere within the service remains pleasant and relaxed for everyone.
Accreditation standards
You should refer to the NCAC accreditation principles to see how these relate to interactions
with children at http://www.ncac.gov.au/
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Communication
Children use communication skills (both verbal and non-verbal) to:
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access the ideas and guidance of others
refine and test their own ideas and to form social relationships.
Children’s communication and language skills relate directly to how much adults:
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treat them as partners in conversation
listen actively and respond
initiate interactions where necessary
maintain conversations and communicate courteously.
Good communication is based on respect and trust.
One of the most important things we can do for children is to help them develop a positive
sense of worth or self-esteem. We can do this through modelling behaviour that is accepting
and caring towards them. As a carer of children, it is important that we show children that we
are interested in them, we enjoy their company and that we respect and value the
contributions they make.
The way in which we communicate with children is a very powerful way to do this.
In your actions towards children, convey positive messages such as the ones below:
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I’m special. I’m quite unique.
Sometimes I am different from other people. At other times, I’m the same. It’s OK
to be different.
It’s alright not to be able to do certain things well. I try my best—and that’s
important.
I am respected. I will learn how to respect other people.
I have ideas, thoughts and feelings that are important. Other people’s ideas,
thoughts and feelings are important too.
I am a likeable and loveable person. I feel good about myself.
I need to be honest about myself.
I am not perfect—but that’s OK.
I always try my best to do what I think is right.
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Activity 1
Ways to communicate with children
What do you need to consider when communicating with children?
You should:
Listen carefully to what children are saying.
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Check that you understand what the child means.
Use words and sentences that the child can understand.
Be interested in what children are saying, by accepting their ideas, interests and
feelings.
Model the behaviours you want to encourage.
Think about both verbal and non-verbal communication.
Consider will the communication be enjoyable?
Make sure the communication is honest.
Activity 2
Using appropriate non-verbal communication
Compare these two situations:
1. You arrive home to find your housemate sitting at the kitchen table, shoulders hunched and
head down. On hearing you arrive, he quickly looks up, glares at you and says, ‘Thank you for
doing the washing up’.
2. You arrive home find your housemate lying on the lounge with his eyes closed. On hearing
you arrive, he slowly looks up and says, ‘Thank you for doing the washing up’.
Which scenario gives you the idea that you have actually done the washing up? What is the
difference between the two settings?
Did you think the second one gave you the idea that the washing up had been done? The
sarcasm in the first one indicates that the washing up had not been done. Your flatmate was
actually feeling upset in this case. The conversation is the same and yet the meaning is quite
different.
Now compare these two situations:
1. Tran has spilt the milk on the floor. He has gotten some paper towel and is mopping it up.
You walk over to him, crouch down to his level, smiling, and say, ‘Have you had a little
accident?’
2. Tran has spilt the milk on the floor. He has gotten some paper towel and is mopping it up.
You walk over to him, stand with your arms folded and look down at him, frowning. ‘Have you
had a little accident?’
The conversation is the same and yet the meaning through body language and tone is quite
different.
It has been suggested by research that as much as 65% of the meaning of any conversation is
conveyed through the body language of those involved. As adults, we may not be conscious
that we ‘read’ body language but many of us have had conversations where things didn’t feel
right, where we felt uncomfortable and were not able to trust the person we were talking
with. There will have been times when we have chosen to say one thing when our feelings and
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body language were saying another. Children are also able to use and understand body
language, even if they are not able to explain it.
Monitoring non-verbal communication
It is important to remember that children learn so much about their world by watching
everything around them, including the interactions between carers and other children. Carers
must insure that they demonstrate a consistent interest in all children in their care, to
reinforce a child’s feeling of trust and respect.
It is important to show acceptance of all children.
Activity 3
People have their own ‘comfort zone’. If other people get too close, some people may feel
uneasy, wanting to move away. For others there does not appear to be this concern. Children
can often experience the same feelings. Perhaps depending on their mood, they may enjoy
close contact with an adult and then there will be times when they would prefer to have their
own space away from everyone.
It is important to monitor children’s reactions to both verbal and non-verbal communication
strategies, such as hugging, physical contact or making eye contact with an adult. It is
important that we talk with parents to find out what strategies are used in the child’s home
and which reflect the child’s background and culture.
Activity 4
Interact and collaborate with all
children in the service on a regular
basis
Working collaboratively applies to all children—all children can be consulted. However, the
type, style and amount of consultation will vary depending on a number of factors—eg, the
age of the child, the child’s special needs and ability and the family’s culture. Workers’
responsiveness to babies’ cues prepares them for choice and decision making as they grow and
develop.
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What does it mean to collaborate with
children?
The Australian Early Childhood Code of Ethics (1990) states that staff should acknowledge the
uniqueness and potential of every child and enhance the strengths, competence and selfesteem of each child in their care.
Essential to the success of working collaboratively are:
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the basic understanding and acceptance that there is equality amongst those
involved
a respect of the uniqueness and the diversity of each individual.
The positive outcome of the collaboration depends upon the ability of each person to focus
objectively on the process and the task to be completed.
Collaboration with a toddler (18 months–three years) can take place through a play experience
in which they want to be involved or where they would like to play. It may include the plates
and utensils they eat with and the clothes they choose to wear. Respecting their choice of
sleeping preferences, comforters and preferred carers enhances their interest in co-operating.
Accreditation standards
Refer to the NCAC accreditation principles. The following are examples of high quality care.
Giving children access to a variety of resources and experiences allows them to choose the
ones that interest them and match their competence levels. In both the indoor and outdoor
environments, children need opportunities to self select equipment.
Children gain a greater understanding of their own competence if they are consulted on the
equipment and materials available and where these are placed. Talking with toddlers and pre
schoolers about the play space can be part of the daily, small-group experience and can
include what happened there that day and what could be planned for the next day.
Indicators (or what you will do on the workplace) of high quality care for all children are:
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You will take an active but sensitive role in extending self-initiated play so that
children feel competent in solving problems that require new skills.
You will be creative in challenging children and the challenges are tailored to the
competence levels and interests of individual children and small groups.
Children’s suggestions and ideas about materials and experiences are consistently
incorporated into the program.
Small groups of children are encouraged to work together on their own projects.
You will be sensitive to the varying levels of competence and confidence of all
children and know when to offer challenge/choice/help and when not to.
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You will appreciate children’s efforts and encourage them to appreciate each
other’s efforts as well.
Collaboration with children can take place at any time and includes all daily routines such as
meal times, dressing and toileting.
Why collaborate with children?
This may seem a strange question to you, but history has shown that prior to the 1960’s
children were not consulted. The indication was that little was known about the way children
learn and develop skills in constructing their own knowledge through problem solving and
consultation.
Grandfather: ‘In my day, no one asked me what I thought. I just had to learn everything off by
heart. If I asked questions, I was interrupting or being rude.’
Mother: ‘I was talking to a woman who recently arrived in Australia who said that children in
her culture were not encouraged to have opinions or to even be included in adults’
conversations.’
Young teenage daughter: ‘Sometimes we get to give ideas and opinions when we do projects
at school but often we are told what to do. I think that you have to learn how to really
collaborate with other people.’
Think about a time when you have collaborated with others (eg, planning a party, designing a
holiday, involvement in a work project, etc.) How did you go about it? What processes did you
use?
Did you think of any of the following?
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How were the ideas shared?
How were points of view shared between the people involved?
How readily were people able to compromise and accept changes in suggestions?
How were conflicting opinions handled?
How did each person show respect to the other/s in the group?
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Encourage children to consider new
ideas and interests that haven’t
previously been catered for in the
service
Following the child’s lead
As carers we sometimes think it is our role to direct children’s activity and conversations so
that they have an ‘educational’ purpose. Sometimes we tend to ask questions that do not have
any significance or interest for children. Unfortunately neither of these approaches encourage
children to continue conversations or explore new ideas themselves.
Children need to see that we are genuinely interested in their thoughts and ideas. We can do
this by listening attentively and asking specific questions about what the child has said. If you
engage children in conversation that interests them and follow their lead, you will find that it
will be easy to encourage continued conversation. Using open-ended questions that require
more than a ‘yes’ or ‘no’ answer are the most appropriate here. For example; “What if ….,
When could ….., Why ……, or How…….?”
Activity 5
When you plan for experiences, it is normally with the individual needs of the children being
observed and assessed in mind. You need to be aware that even the best-laid plans can go
astray through no fault of anyone, but simply because the children did not feel like being a part
of the experience.
Consider this example:
You have set up a very intricate corner of blocks and cars next to the home corner. Your
intention is to provide activities that will enhance children’s cognitive skills. However, one of
the children talks about how you could take the whole set-up outside into the sandpit. How
would you react? Do you get disappointed?
It is important that you encompass a totally flexible approach to the situation. Rather than
react negatively, comment about the great idea and ask the child how we could get it all
outside.
In the situation above, another child might say ‘Oh that’s a dumb idea.’ Once again, it’s how
you react that will influence the behaviours of the children. It is important that you:
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support the ideas of all the children
challenge those who might criticise the ideas of others.
Communicating ideas 1
Communicating ideas 2
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Considering children’s interests
The benefits of creating an environment where children are encouraged to develop and speak
about their own ideas are a powerful tool in developing self-esteem.
Some people say that children are born with 100% self-esteem. By the time they reach their
teenage years, however, they speculate that this would have gone done considerably.
As an educator and supporter of young children, you have the opportunity to increase
children’s self-esteem significantly. Your role is to ensure you are facilitating their ideas and
interests rather than manipulating conversations to fulfil your ideas of what might be
appropriate. How do you know that something won’t work?
When you are encouraging children to think creatively, you might benefit from planning.
Below is an ‘action planning’ model that you could implement.
An action planning model to implement
Plan
Action
Set a goal with them.
Determine what they want and define its
importance.
Generate ideas
Generate ideas, gather information and explore
details and outcomes.
Develop solutions
Develop options, alternatives, possible solutions,
the resources/support needed, etc
Select the best solution(s)
Help them select the best way to reach their goal
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or successfully achieve their ideas.
Develop action planning
Support the development of an action plan.
Allocate resources. Set deadlines.
Summarise and finish positively
Regardless of the outcomes, always encourage the
creative ideas.
Activity 6
Introducing new ideas
New ideas and interests can be introduced at any time. While observations of the children’s
interests are of first importance, other children’s or carers’ interests can be shared as well. This
gives the child opportunities to explore new materials and concepts.
What interesting places have you visited recently? You may have visited a farm or a city or an
exhibition. What could you share with the children?
Sharing photographs or items you may have purchased while travelling can stimulate
conversation and lead to creative activities where children can work together to solve
problems or collaborate to create an expression of the experience.
Parents should also be invited to share their interests with the children. These might include:
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playing a musical instrument
sharing about what job they have
or explaining a particular festival they celebrate—eg, Girls’ Day/Boys’ Day
(Japanese) or New Year (Chinese or Greek).
Another way to explore children’s ideas and interests is to use ‘What-if?’ questions. An
example of this could include using this type of questioning when planting a variety of seeds.
This could be followed up by observation of different types of seeds, plants and gardens.
Especially for the five to 12 year age group, you could explore further with activities such as
the ones below:
Put on a pair of socks and walking in an area to pick up seeds and then planting them to see
what grows. Documentation of this adds to the experience.
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Create a flower or vegetable garden.
Involve the children in re-designing garden areas in the playground.
‘Plant’ refuse materials and then digging them up to discover how and if they
break down and discussing the effect on the environment.
Children should be given every opportunity to make choices throughout the activities. They
should also be given the opportunity to change the direction of the activity if that is where
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their interests lie. Sometimes new interests for children just happen due to unexpected events
or situations.
Activity 7
Allow sufficient time for children to
express their ideas in a variety of
contexts
Giving children enough time to express their own ideas is always a challenge!
Children take longer to work through and express their ideas than adults. Did you know that
it’s a good idea to allow children at least 10 seconds to respond when you are talking to them?
Stop now and stay silent for 10 seconds. Most adults are very surprised at how long this really
is.
On a day-to-day basis, it is important not to allow ‘household’ tasks to ‘take over’ from the real
purpose of the service.
Allowing time to choose
Here is how Scott in the Wallaby Room (Out Of School Hours Service) implemented a way of
allowing children time to choose:
I sat down with all the children in a circle on the floor and I asked them what they would
like for afternoon tea the next day.
I took all of the children’s ideas and suggestions and I wrote them all down on a piece of
paper and then cut the paper into squares and with the children’s help I put them in a box.
I chose a child to pick out one of the squares of paper from the box. This was to be the
choice of afternoon tea for the next day.
I then asked the children to pair up with another child. Once they had done this, we set up
a roster system so that all the children would get a chance to pick a square from the box
and have a turn to help prepare the afternoon tea.
I didn’t rush them at all. I allowed them to take their time and make up their own minds.
Once they had made a decision we went on to the next step. I told them that all their ideas
were great and that we would be enjoying some good eating!’
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In order to check whether sufficient time is being allowed for children to express their ideas, a
review and monitoring of routine practices can be useful.
Positively acknowledge and act
upon suggestions whenever
possible
Extending children’s ideas
Read the following scenario about how Carla, the teacher in the 3–5s room, assisted the
children to follow through with their ideas.
‘I was outside in the play area when Jesse (five years) came over to me. He said that he and
Matthew (five years and six months) wanted to make an ‘over-under climbing thing’. It
was nearly time to go inside for bathroom and lunch, so the timing was not appropriate,
but the idea was definitely possible at a later time.
I said to Jesse, ‘That sounds interesting and fun, but the bell is just about to ring. How
about doing this when it’s afternoon play? I could help you get what you need out of the
shed. You and Matt might like to decide what you need to use and where you’d like to put
it.’ Jesse looked a little disappointed. Just then the bell rang and his face changed and he
said, ‘OK, you won’t forget will you?!’ I said, ‘I sure won’t.’ He smiled at me and ran to
Matthew. They spoke and then went inside.
Lunch was served and then it was rest time. Jesse and Matthew were non-sleepers. I sat
with them in the book corner. I took some paper and pencils and asked, ‘Would you like to
draw what you are going to use and where you might like to put it?’
‘Yeah!’ was the reply. There was silence. I then asked, ‘Do you think it needs to be soft
or…?’
‘Yeah! Those big mats and the blocks,’ said Matt.
Jesse added quickly, ‘Yeah, cool and the tunnel too.’
They looked to me. I said, ‘Great idea, this is sounding really exciting. You’ve got something
to go over—.’
‘Go in,’ said Matt.
‘Mmm, what else was there?’ I said.
‘Mmm, under’ said Jesse. There was silence.
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‘I wonder what you could use that you could go under?’ I said.
No one could think of anything so I suggested that they might see something when we
went to the shed to get other things, and they nodded.
‘Where do you think would be the best place for this?’ I asked.
‘Near the slide’ said Jesse. ‘Yeah’ said Matthew. ‘Okay when we go outside we’ll have a
look to see will we?’ ‘Yeah you can help but no one else.’ said Matthew.
I left the boys to their plans as I had to write the Day journal. We went outside at long last.
The boys picked their equipment—it was safe and appropriate.
I said, ‘I can see that you have done a good job of picking things that are safe for your idea.
Well done.’ The boys smiled. ‘It’s important to be safe isn’t it?’ I said.
‘Yep, we want to have fun. You can play too.’ said Jesse. ‘I’ll have a try,’ I said.
Their next challenge was the right area for this adventure. The boys had chosen to do this
near the slide, which I had thought wasn’t safe or appropriate but I felt they could make
this decision when they were able to see the problems. We walked to the area and I
listened as the boys planned where they were going to put everything. I asked if they
thought there were going to be any problems with having it here and they said ‘no’.
I said, ‘What might happen if someone uses the slide?’
‘They can’t because we’re here,’ said Matthew.
‘Do you think that is fair to everyone else?’ I asked.
‘I know, what about over there?’ Matthew was pointing to the empty garden area, which
was no longer in use.
‘That looks like it might be a good place. What do you think Jesse?’ I asked.
Jesse said, ‘Okay, we won’t be near anyone else.’
The boys worked together to move their equipment to the location. We checked to see that
it was clear of any sticks or other objects.
Two other children had joined the construction team. I stepped back and watched as they
made their ‘over and under climbing thing’. The children seemed satisfied with their
creation. I was called on for a turn, which I took.
The structure changed shape over the period of the play. It grew and so did the number of
children participating. The children organised themselves into turns and continued safely.
At one point, someone added a piece that wasn’t safe.
Just as I approached, Matthew yelled, ‘Stop!’ and fixed the structure.
This was the theme for the rest of the week. Things were built and rebuilt it was
fascinating to watch. Posters were put up and discussions were had. Even a parent who
was a bricklayer came and talked with the children.’
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In this last scenario, did you notice the communication methods used by the carer?
There were examples of active listening skills and feedback used for checking what the children
wanted to do and assisting them to explore their options.
It is important to use best practice communication skills, active listening, appropriate body
language and feedback—both verbal and non-verbal.
Creating a calm and relaxed environment that invites interaction and places importance on
collaboration, not on tasks to be completed, ensures that the child/children feel respected.
This is most useful when Toddlers (18 months—three years) are developing self-help skills.
Dressing, bathing and mealtimes are times of extended learning and extra time is necessary to
allow this important activity to take place.
Flexibility allows for the children to direct activities and to maximise their creativity. The use of
these techniques demonstrates that sufficient time is being allowed for children to express
their ideas.
Acting upon suggestions in a positive manner
So here you are. You have completed the majority of this topic and know why it is important to
collaborate with children but now you’ll need to put the plans into action. You may well have
significant doubts about the success of some of the ideas and suggestions but as a
‘collaborator’, you will need to set aside these doubts and support the children as they
implement plans. It is important that you appear 100% behind the ideas of children to
reinforce the value of their input.
Following is a checklist for you to complete as you help action ideas. We might call these the
LEASE principles of communication—ie, Listen, Empathise, Assert and Support.
Listen
You will need to demonstrate active listening skills through maintaining eye contact, asking
questions, seeking confirmation of her ideas, writing down her suggestions and plans.
Empathise
Using words such as ‘ I can see that you are feeling very excited by that big smile on your face!’
and ‘If you are feeling worried about that part of the plan…’
Assert
You will need to be assertive in encouraging her thoughts even if she appears to clam up.
‘That’s it Sarah-Jane. What else do you think? You are thinking of so many great ideas.’ You will
also need to ensure the tasks are allocated fairly.
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Support
As this plan goes through the various stages of implementation, you will need to offer support
when things are going well but particularly if the are some obstacles or if things go astray.
Sarah-Jane needs to feel you are backing her and her ideas all the way, regardless of outcome.
Further, have you encouraged esteem?
Esteem
At the completion of this implementation, every child must feel that they have been successful
because their idea was good. Their self-esteem must be intact and, hopefully, enhanced
through this process.
Activity 8
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