Uncovered Week 1 - Solitude
Introduction: Stress
Video: Stress
Cold opening with a 30-45 second video montage of stressful clips from movies.
Isn’t that what life feels like sometimes?
The pace and the stress of our lives has a hugely negative effect on us.
Stress makes me talk to myself. I had a day recently where it felt like all I did was talk to myself. And you
know what I said? “Hurry up.” Hurry up. Over and over I said, hurry up, Brian; you’re late Brian. They are
waiting for you Brian. Hurry up. I just wanted to tell myself to Shut up… but I couldn’t.
It all started because my wife was out of town. So I had to take care of our two elderly dogs. Yeah. Their
names are high and maintenance. Not really, but that’s what I call them. I had to walk them, beg them to
eat, clean up after one of them… that would be the dog named maintenance if you are wondering.
So I was late to the first thing on my calendar and subsequently to everything on my calendar.
Hurry up. Hurry up.
Stressful.
You know what I am talking about.
I bet we could go around the room and every one of us could describe a day just like that…a day full of
stress and hurry. For some of us it is a way of life.
Series Intro
Now you might be wondering why I’m trying to stress you out, and, well, I’m really not. I just want us to
think about how most of us don’t just have a day that is filled with stress, we live lives that are filled with
stress. And the thing is…I don’t think we have to. I don’t think we have to live stress-filled lives. You see, I
believe God has given us spiritual practices that can bring peace, calm, and clarity into our otherwise
hectic existence.
Today we’re starting a 3-week series called “Uncovered.” This series is all about “training yourself to be
godly.” That phrase comes from a letter the Apostle Paul wrote to his young apprentice, Timothy, in
which he says:
“…train yourself to be godly. For physical training is of some value, but godliness has value for
all things, holding promise for both the present life and the life to come.” (1 Timothy 4:7b-8)
Now I want to draw our attention to what might seem like a small detail but is critically important. Notice
Paul uses a very specific word… he says we should (underline word) “train” for godliness.
How many times have you thought to yourself:
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“I’ll try to be good.”
“I’ll try not to give in to that temptation.”
“I’ll try to do what God would have me do.”
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But here, Paul says that’s it’s not about trying harder; instead, it’s about training.
It’s like the great theologian, Yoda, says: “Do or do not. There is no try.” 
The truth is, we all have areas of our lives where we struggle to be like Jesus. And if we’re honest, just
gritting our teeth and trying harder isn’t working. This is where spiritual practices are invaluable.
Spiritual practices are things we can do right now that help us “train” to do things we can’t do right now.
Think about it this way. If you asked me to run a marathon right now, I’d laugh in your face. I couldn’t do
it. No amount of “trying” would make me able to do it. But, if I took the next 6-9 months (or maybe a year)
and followed a plan designed to train my body to run a marathon, I would physically be transformed and
have a much better shot at completing 26.2 miles.
In his book, The Life You’ve Always Wanted, author John Ortberg says:
“Spiritual transformation is not a matter of trying harder, but of training wisely.” –John Ortberg
And so during this series, we want to help one another train wisely. Over the next 3 weeks we’re going to
“uncover” three spiritual practices that most of us have forgotten. Like an exercise bike that’s covered in
clothes or a treadmill that’s stacked with boxes, we want to clear the dust off these spiritual practices and
put them to use so that we can train ourselves to be godly.
And as we do… as we persist in these spiritual practices…in some mysterious and profound way, God
works in us to spiritually transform our heart and character.
The Practice of Solitude
The practice we want to uncover today is the forgotten practice of solitude. Now, as soon as I say the
word “solitude,” most of us probably have a thought or a mental image come into our heads.
Maybe you think, “Solitude? Yeah right, have you met my children?!” Or “Do you know how loud my
roommate is?!” If you’re an extrovert, maybe you have a mental image of a scary monk who hasn’t seen
another person in years or a strange hermit living off the grid out in the desert.
But here’s the thing…that’s not what the spiritual practice of solitude is all about. I’m not telling you to
throw out your cell phone and live in the woods. Instead, I’m talking about making an intentional decision
to spend time alone with God.
Solitude, at its core, is simply refraining from interacting with other people in order to be alone
with God and be found by him. It’s choosing to step away from human relationships for a
predetermined period of time, in isolation or anonymity, to make room for God to occupy our
lives. (Adapted from Dallas Willard)
See this isn’t some practice that crazy people do. It’s not some practice reserved for the most committed
or the most spiritual. It’s not just for clergy or monks or hermits. Solitude is a spiritual practice for all of
us. It’s a practice we all need to uncover.
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Problem: Busyness & Noise
But why? Why do I need this practice? What good will it bring to my every day life?” Well, I think most of
us would say that we’d like peace more than anxiety. We’d like calm more than stress. We’d like clarity
more than confusion.
But then think about how our lives are structured:
 We sit in traffic.
 We rush from one appointment to the next…
o …from meeting to meeting.
o …from email to email.
 We take on more responsibilities at work.
 We see deadlines quickly approaching.
 We take kids to this practice and that rehearsal.
 We spend evenings trying to help them learn “new math.” (as if we know it)
 We try to throw together a healthy dinner.
 We make plans with friends for the weekend.
 We run in and out of a house that is a mess and glance at the laundry that needs to be done.
 There’s groceries, bills, and car repairs.
Wow! It can get overwhelming!
But let’s just hit the pause button on all that busyness and be honest for a moment. Sometimes we do this
to ourselves, don’t we? Sometimes we allow our schedules to get packed full of commitments without
even stopping to think about why we’re doing it.
And it’s not just busyness; some of us are addicted to noise. Even when we are alone, we’re not alone.
When we are at home, the TV is blaring, the radio is on. When we go for a walk or ride the train our ear
buds are in. One author I came across says we are the most “noise-polluted generation ever”. We are
rarely alone with our thoughts.
A question I want us to consider today is this: What’s the result of all of this busyness and noise?
How is it affecting us?
Our relationships?
Our spiritual development?
If you recognize your life in what I’m describing, you know the result.
 Anxiety.
 Tiredness.
 A lack of clarity.
Can anyone relate?
You see, we can try to live a different way. We can try to be at peace. My guess is many of us have given it
a shot. But it’s the spiritual practice of solitude that can actually train us to experience life in a different
way.
Jesus’ Practice of Solitude
But then there’s Jesus. When we look at Jesus’ life, we see the exact opposite of stress, tiredness, and a
lack of clarity. His life was characterized by peace, focus, and a deep sense of purpose. Don’t
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misunderstand; Jesus had a demanding public life. He was constantly traveling from place to place.
People always wanted a piece of him. Yet, he still managed to be at peace.
How?
Jesus “trained” himself. He regularly engaged in the spiritual practice of solitude.
Let’s see how this practice played out in his life…
First, Jesus Started His Days with Solitude. Mark tells us in the first chapter of his gospel that…
Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a
solitary place, where he prayed. (Mark 1:35)
Jesus began his day with a time of solitude. This wasn’t a religious activity; it was a relational one. It
provided time for him to connect with his Father.
How do you start your day?
About 3 months ago, I realized that when I get up in the morning, the first thing I do (after I get coffee) is
open up my computer. Emails, ESPN, even the news immediately occupy my brain. I found that my
thoughts and emotions start to coil up and get tight before I even take a shower. My mind is racing in lots
of different areas and the pace of my life seems to become an issue for me…all before breakfast.
Thankfully, I remembered a time in my life where the order of my day was more intentional. So I have
started to make an adjustment. First things first. Before anything else, I stop and practice solitude. Alone.
With God. It’s a difference maker.
A second thing we see in Jesus’ life is that Jesus Managed Busyness in Solitude. As I mentioned, Jesus’
days were busy. He was in demand. Luke says this about Jesus:
“…the news about him spread all the more, so that crowds of people came to hear him and to
be healed of their sicknesses.” (Luke 5:15)
What did Jesus do as the crowds grew and the opportunities multiplied? The very next verse tells us: (add
to previous slide)
“But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed.” (Luke 5:16)
It seems the busier he got, the more committed to solitude he became. Solitude kept him focused. Solitude
gave him perspective. Solitude kept him in step with the purpose of his life. Jesus knew he needed this
practice, so he made it a priority.
Jesus also Made Decisions in Solitude. In Luke chapter 6, Jesus is getting ready to make a major
decision…he’s about to choose the 12 people who would become his apprentices, his 12 disciples. This
decision would change the trajectory of history. These would be people he would invest in and send out
to help people find their way back to God. It was a really big deal! So what does he do? Luke tells us:
“One of those days Jesus went out to a mountainside to pray, and spent the night praying to
God. When morning came, he called his disciples to him and chose twelve of them, whom he
also designated apostles.” (Luke 6: 12-13)
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Every day we face any number of decisions…some big, some small. Jesus found clarity when he spent
time alone with his Father, and we can too! The decisions we make shape our lives…don’t you want to
receive wisdom from God when making them? Solitude creates the space for us to hear from him.
Notice how sometimes Jesus takes a few minutes to be alone, and other times, like this particular time, he
takes extended times. It doesn’t mean that we have to stay up all night in order to train ourselves to be
godly. Sometimes we just need a few minutes of solitude, but other times we might face a weightier
decision and carve out a longer period of time. Either way, we see Jesus practice solitude when making
important decisions.
Lastly, Jesus Processed Pain in Solitude. In one of the hardest moments of his life, Jesus receives news
that John the Baptist has been murdered. John was the prophet who paved the way for Jesus. John was
the one who baptized Jesus. He was family, literally; he was Jesus’ cousin. When the news reaches him of
John’s death, in his grief, what does Jesus do? Matthew tells us:
“When Jesus heard what had happened, he withdrew by boat privately to a solitary place.”
(Matthew 14:13)
How do you deal with pain? My tendency is to either avoid it by distracting myself or to try and solve it by
explaining it away. Jesus? Jesus chose solitude in order to process it. Being alone, sharing the pain we feel
with God, is tremendously healing. Remember, we said that solitude is simply refraining from interacting
with other people in order to be alone with God and be found by him.
The hardest times in my life, when everything seems to have fallen apart, have been the greatest
opportunities for intimacy with God. I found healing NOT by things magically getting better, but by God’s
presence with me when I was alone. Some of you know exactly what I’m talking about. God’s healing
touch coming in moments of solitude, bringing peace into our brokenness. But we need to withdraw, as
Jesus did.
Solitude is not the only action we take when we are in pain. Hopefully, we reach out to others and we
allow our friends and families, our small groups, to care for us; but there is a peace that I think can only
be found in solitude. Alone. With God.
I want to be like Jesus. I want to live with the peace and clarity and focus he had. But in order to be like
Jesus, I need to train like Jesus. I need to train like Jesus in how I…
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Start my day
Manage my busyness
Make decisions
Process pain
The spiritual practice of solitude can help me train to be godly, can help transform me to be more like
Jesus.
Challenge: Uncover the Practice of Solitude
So how do we dust this practice off? How do we uncover it?
Let me give you three practical steps you can take to begin to train yourself.
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Start by having Minute Retreats. Maybe solitude feels so foreign and almost “monk-like” to you. It’s ok.
Let’s begin our training by taking a minute to just be quiet and connect with God. Literally 60 seconds to
pray. To thank God. To be still. To ask God to be in charge.
This can be a minute during your morning coffee, a minute in an elevator, a minute in line at the drive
thru. Any minute of your day can become a “Minute Retreat” where you intentionally refrain from
interacting with the world around you and fix your thoughts and attention on God. Even if you only have
a few seconds, even if it’s not absolutely quiet or a completely solitary place, you can still begin your
training by being alone with God in a minute of solitude.
But we will really begin to experience the benefits of solitude when we practice Daily Retreats.
Start your day alone with God on a regular, daily basis. Or, perhaps, end your day with him in quiet
reflection. For me, before I open my computer, before I even look at my phone; I want to take a moment
to just quiet myself. I want to ask God to be present in my life and to help me hear and respond to him
throughout the coming day. Sometimes that is a few minutes, sometimes longer. I end up reading the
Bible during this time, but my focus is not on me and my day. It is on God and his greatness. If you train
yourself to focus on God at the start of each day, you will be amazed at the peace and the perspective you
have throughout the day.
As solitude becomes a part of training yourself you to be godly, you might want to try an Extended
Retreat. I know people who seasonally take an entire day to just be quiet and alone with God. I have a
friend that loves to go into nature and spend extended times alone, withdrawing from the bustle of life,
focused on being with God. In fact, the staff here at COMMUNITY challenges one another to do this on a
quarterly basis. (Handout) We have a guide that the staff use that gives some ideas for an extended time
of solitude. If you’re interested in giving this a try, you can download this guide at
http://www.communitychristian.org/uncovered
Conclusion
Here’s the thing, friends. God is with you. Psalm 46:10 says: “Be still and know that I am God.” God
longs for us to be still. To be alone where we can refrain from interacting with other people in order to be
with him and be found by him.
Some of us have been so busy, surrounded by so much noise, that we don’t even recognize that our soul is
crying out for the presence of God.
Can we be still? Can we practice being alone with God?
Train yourself to be godly. Train yourself by uncovering the discipline of solitude.
Possible paragraph leading into response moment…
Even though you aren’t alone right now, even though this may not be a quiet place, we still want to take
some time this morning to train…to train ourselves to be godly. We’re going to do something a little
different this morning. We’re going to take the next 10-12 minutes and I want to ask you to imagine
yourself here, alone with God. Forget everyone else around you. Think only of him. And in these moments
of virtual solitude, hear him say, “Be still and know that I am God.” Listen for him. Open your heart to him.
Let his nearness come over you…
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