STAFF HIRING, TRAINING AND MANAGEMENT
The Behavior Management Strategy
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Understanding behavior & choices Helping kids develop positive behavior Staff Communication & Teamwork – clarity & consistency New philosophy on negative behavior – roles, responsibility, & role modeling Logical consequences vs. Punishment Age based discipline strategies Written by Scott Arizala
[email protected] www.TheCampCounselor.com © 2013 All Rights Reserved
Understanding behavior and choices: Why do kids make the choices they make?
Kids make choices based on a set of underlying principles or ideas
1. How do I fit in with the rest of the group?
2. What do my friends think is cool and/or not cool?
3. What can I do to be more (or sometimes less) socially central?
Simply put, they ask, “Am I cool?”
 They are looking to figure out how they currently relate to everyone else
Kids have insecurities “the Freak Out”
 Known
o Clothes, friends, abilities, race, gender, etc.
 Unknown
o Family history, recent trauma, associations, etc.
Kids create coping strategies based on wanting to fit in and connect, then having an insecurity about
those connections
 Healthy
o Make new friends, actively participate, seek out adult reassurance, etc.
 Unhealthy
o Withdrawal, bullying, acting out, etc.
This in turn creates a web of connections to the immediate peer group and the camp community at
large. They create a social space where they exist based on the expectations of others learned from
the choices they have made.
Which feeds the cycle as each kid continually reassess how they fit and are connected to everyone
else (back to “Am I cool?”).
If we know that they make choices based on this reliable cycle, then we can help them manage their
choices by manipulating the cycle.
Am I cool?
 Get to know everyone in the group 
 Games, activities, distraction 
 One-on-one time 
 Create strong group identity 
 Group responsibility, jobs, and duties 
The freak out
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Different leaders / pairs for games
Written by Scott Arizala
[email protected] www.TheCampCounselor.com
© 2013 All Rights Reserved
• Non-competitive choices
 Diverse choices and variations of activities 
 Process & procedures = culture (Were you explicit about your expectations? Do they know
HOW to do things?) 
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Coping strategies
 Teach to the undeveloped skill (more on this in Problem Solving and Conflict Management) 
 Praise good choices 
 Offer them choices they can actually make 
o Will I let them do this?
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o Appropriate choices
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o Choices that boost responsibility 
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Connection 
1) Variety of small group experiences (small groups within cabin or core unit group) 
2) Diverse choices and variations of activities 
3) Creating cabin/unit rules or expectations (as a group) 

Training Suggestions: 
 Introduce them to this cycle and the concepts in each stage. Then have them brainstorm
different ways to manipulate the cycle. Use the ideas of prevention and intervention to have
them come up with ways that this can be useful. Even if there are ideas that they already do
(i.e. like playing name games on the first day) have them frame it or explain it using these
new ideas. 
2. Have them identify and discuss how they themselves are going through this process. What
are their insecurities, how do they cope, etc. 3. Constantly review and connect this cycle to other sessions or ideas you are presenting during
training.
a. How does this topic/idea relate to one of the stages in the cycle?
b. b. What may cause campers to feel insecure during this procedure/time/activity?
c. c. Why do you think a camper would make that choice? Examples:
Bullying
 Using this framework actually makes Bullying & Teasing behavior normative (albeit still
unhealthy and damaging). It is a coping strategy that some kids use to create connections. I
prefer to talk about bullying in this framework because it takes some of the “overwhelming”
out of the concept of it. When we frame it like this, staff understand it better and can even
identify with it, then it seems more doable to prevent it or intervene when it is happening. 
 Instead of seeing bullying as a lack of social skills, this framework assumes that bullies
are actually fairly socially adept. The whole point is to help counselors identify with
bullying as a strategy for creating connections and relationships, that way they are more
apt to actually see it when it happens. 
Written by Scott Arizala [email protected] www.TheCampCounselor.com © 2013 All Rights Reserved

If that is what we know they are trying to do when they pick on another camper, then the
most effective and logical consequences are to take away the power of the group, thus
breaking the cycle of social centrality.
Kids are not listening
 Thinking about listening using these ideas gives the adult a completely different agenda for
what they are saying.
o How can you foster connections, limit insecurities, teaching coping skills, etc. by
giving better directions, instructions, expectations, or guidance?
o How can you include the kids in more of the discussion?
o How can you make them the expert?
Campers are being disrespectful
 What does the camper have to gain by being disrespectful? How does it elevate them in the
eyes of their peers? Who are they being disrespectful to? 
 If it is a new counselor to camp, then the solution may be for that counselor to become
more familiar and a part of camp culture. The camper that “picks on” the new counselor is
seen as someone that is carrying the torch for camp and that respects the history and
culture. It is more than “I know more about camp than you” although it may come out that
way. Kids are deeply connected to the culture at camp and someone that cares about the
culture and traditions, seems knowledgeable about the HOW of camp, and is clearly liked
and included by other staff will have more respect to begin with. 
 Remember that being disrespectful is a coping strategy for feeling some sort of insecurity.
How can you turn that around by making it desirable and “cool” to do the opposite or to be
respectful? 
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Written by Scott Arizala
[email protected] www.TheCampCounselor.com
© 2013 All Rights Reserved
Helping kids develop positive behavior
In order for any Behavior Management technique, strategy or idea to work there are 4 big ideas or
principles that we have to train to the staff, teach constantly, role model ourselves and really
believe in.
1. Selective Negative Focus
2. This is how they learn
3. How you feel about it won’t help
4. Kids are in control of their own choices
Selective Negative Focus
Most kids (in fact most people) do the right things most of the time, as adults in their lives (or as
anyone with power over someone else) we take a passive approach to managing 99% of the
behavior we see. It is only when they screw up that we feel we need to “do something” about it or
take a more active approach. There is actually a psychological term/condition that refers to this, it is
called Selective Negative Focus, which is the tendency to not only dwell on the negative but to
actually screen out what ever contradicts it (in this case all the positive stuff kids do).
Lets instead decide that we are going to actively and consciously ENCOURAGE AND SUPPORT all the
positive behaviors that we see constantly that are a part of everyday life. For this to work however,
you have to do the hard work of seeing and recognizing all of this behavior as conscious choices (see
What am I looking for?)
This is how they learn
Kids have a natural ability to figure out what they can get away with depending on who is around.
How do they do this? They are constantly testing the limits and pushing on the boundaries. They are
learning how to navigate through life by doing this. When they get away with something one time
and not the next, it teaches them that adults (or at least that adult) is inconsistent and may not be
trustworthy.
How you feel about it won’t help
Too often adult’s emotions cloud their thinking about a particular behavior from a camper. No
matter how mad, upset, angry, disappointed, frustrated, or whatever the adult is, that won’t
necessarily help the camper learn from their mistake. When our emotions and feelings are at the
forefront of our discussions or leading our thinking on consequences it is harder to be fair,
consistent, and clear with our expectations and any particular consequences. However, there is
some camper behavior that upsets us, therefore we need to get help and support during any or all
of our behavior situations.
Kids are in control of their own choices
This is the one that seems obvious, but is usually not how we actually handle behavior, especially
when we train counselors and frontline staff in how to talk to and handle specific situations. It is not
our job to control their choices, it is not our job nor is it possible to control the decisions that kids
make, we can only be there to help support and encourage good choices and to deliver
consequences for bad choices. WE ARE NOT DISCIPLINARIANS, they are. They should be the
active player in any discipline strategy.
Written by Scott Arizala [email protected] www.TheCampCounselor.com © 2013 All Rights Reserved
What am I looking for?
Getting what we want = knowing what to look for
Teach your staff (and your selves) to always ask themselves that essential question whenever they
are with kids, “What am I looking for?” The answers that they need to come up with are the life
skills, values, characters, etc. that are important and integral to your camp.
According to your website Your Camp’s Difference is: (some examples may be)
 Fun, friendship & memories 
 Tools to be confident 
 Develop skills to last a lifetime 
 Self-confidence & pride through challenge 
 Encourage discovery 
 Strong sense of family 
 Healthy & active lifestyles 
 Encourage new experiences 
 Nurture individual interests 
 Improved social skills 

So, if that is the difference between Your Camp and every other camp out there, then you have to
be really good at helping campers develop those skills. If that is what we are looking for then what
do we do when we see it and how do we actively engage in role modeling and teaching it? 

Praise Teach counselors how to specifically praise the behavior they want to see.
 Be specific 
 Say something you saw or observed 
 Praise the process, not the product
Practice
Teach counselors how to practice not only seeing the behavior, but actively setting up
opportunities for kids to practice each skill (just like having patience at Archery or persistence at
the climbing wall)
Present
Teach counselors how to present or teach a skill when they see the opposite. Instead of just
telling a kid to stop name calling (disrespectful), we should be talking to them about how to be
respectful.
Training Suggestions:
1. Develop 20-30 typical scenes or scenarios that happen every day at camp. Make
them purposefully vague and not necessarily noteworthy (i.e. There is a group of
Written by Scott Arizala

[email protected] www.TheCampCounselor.com
© 2013 All Rights Reserved
2.
3.
4.
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kids playing basketball and one of the campers fouls another one pretty hard. He
immediately says he’s sorry and shakes the other camper’s hand.). Then have the staff in
small groups try to come up with as many life skills as possible that they might be looking for
in this moment.
Make a list of all of the activities that campers do at camp. In small groups have the staff
develop lists of life skills that campers could learn and/or be presenting during each activity.
Do a life skills brainstorm, just like rainy day activities. Decide on themes for each week of camp. Keep the list to only 3 or 4 skills. Those are the
specifics that the staff will be on the lookout for. ROLE MODEL – make sure that every member of the leadership team is doing this everyday
with their staff. Examples:
Bullying
 Bullying and teasing do not happen as isolated incidents or inside a vacuum of behavior.
They are tools in a range of social choices and strategies. Just that framework alone will help
counselors and staff see more of the positive behavior and praise it. 
 Bullying mostly happens under the radar of the counselors. They just don’t know it is
happening. When we work really hard at identifying and encouraging positive behavior (i.e.
self-confidence, strong sense of family, improved social skills, etc.) campers will be better
able to handle bullying situations when adults are not around. The will also be able to relate
to and trust counselors more and hopefully let them know when something is happening
behind their backs. 
 Most bullying behavior happens in conjunction with more pro-social behaviors (remember it
is just one tool). Identifying, encouraging and supporting those behaviors will go a long way
to helping. However, combining that idea with the concepts in the first section, those prosocial behaviors need to be seen by the camper/bully as effective strategies for creating
connections. So, when counselors see someone being nice or inclusive they need to do more
than praise the behavior. They need to point out and reinforce how that behavior helped
achieve their goals of connection. 
o Getting the rest of the group or the bystanders to walk away when someone is being
mean or picking on someone else does this effectively.

Kids are not listening 
 What are you saying and how are you saying it? There could be any number of reasons why
kids aren’t listening. What can you control? 
 Make listening part of the game: attention getting tricks, make up nonsense rules, have
them decide what the rules/expectations are for an activity, etc. 

Written by Scott Arizala
[email protected] www.TheCampCounselor.com © 2013 All Rights Reserved 
Campers are being disrespectful 
 Most of the time when kids are being disrespectful to adults or to other kids it is a misguided
attempt to create a connection with others, show how confident they are, push limits and
boundaries, etc. 
 Work to recognize these same skills in more positive moments to validate the HOW of the
skill instead of criticizing the WHAT every time they are being disrespectful
 Practicing “present” or replacement is key here. You have to talk to kids about what they
should be doing instead of just telling them to stop what they are doing.
Written by Scott Arizala
[email protected] www.TheCampCounselor.com
© 2013 All Rights Reserved
Staff Communication & Teamwork – clarity & consistency
Ultimately, none of this will work if the staff aren’t working together as a team and delivering clear
and consistent messages about kids’ behavior and the consequences to bad choices. The staff need
to be trained and managed based on three areas:
1) Attitude
2) Knowledge
3) Behavior
If they don’t believe in what you are doing (attitude) then no matter how much they know they
won’t do the right things (behavior). You have to convey the message to them that this is vitally
important to the mission of the camp AND it will make their jobs easier as counselors and frontline
staff. You have to get the emotional buy in or the belief in these principles for them to be effective.
It is hard work to take this approach, it will be easy for them to slip back into their old habits if they
don’t have the right attitude.
Knowledge is what you teach or train them on during orientation.
Behavior is what you see them do, how you respond to it, and how you support and encourage their
efforts.
All of it has to be consistent from the beginning for this to really be effective. It starts with the
leadership team. You have to actively train these skills and this new way of thinking, you have to
role model these skills both with the staff you supervise and whenever you are interacting with kids,
and you have to be there to support and encourage the counselors every step of the way. When
they get frustrated you have to be there to talk them through it and send them back with more
resources or a willingness to keep trying.
Training suggestions:
1. Do several team building exercises and other training activities that emphasize team building
and communication. Use those moments during training to reflect on the importance of
presenting a united front to campers. Debrief miscommunication and what if feels like,
sounds like, and looks like. Discuss how the best teams function, how people treat and
support each other, and what it means to role model behavior (and of course how their role
modeling helps others with camper behavior). 2. Develop a consistent communication system between the counselors and each other, their
supervisors, and other leadership team members about camper behavior, unit/group/cabin
issues, and anything else. STICK TO IT! Remember you are helping to role model being clear
and consistent. 3. Develop and practice ways of creating very clear expectations for the procedures of camp.
The HOW of camp. Role model how to make sure people are listening and
effectively expressing expectations.
Written by Scott Arizala
[email protected] www.TheCampCounselor.com
© 2013 All Rights Reserved
4. Based on this document and/or other ideas, develop both a basic philosophical approach
and practical strategies for dealing with challenging behavior. Role model these things by
talking about it and practicing it all the time. Tell them WHY we are doing it this way, help
them believe in what we are doing. Give the counselors specific ideas about what they can
and can’t do. Give them the power to act within these guidelines and then reinforce and
support their decisions. Name it.
5. Discuss favorites and how this is so damaging. Relate that to how people give different
consequences to different kids and how it is the same thing. Role model this all the time.
6. Develop a system where every bad choice is talked about. In order to be consistent with the
rules and consequences they must be respected. 7. As a leadership team, break down your training sessions and identify how you are affecting:
attitude, knowledge, and behavior. If you can’t make a clear connection between the
content and one of these categories, rework it, add to it, or otherwise change things up so
you do.
Examples:
Bullying
 Bullying and teasing are unacceptable. In every iteration. That means that staff cannot tease
each other, that even some teasing or play fighting is not ok, and that every time something
like this comes up it is handled the same way by every counselor.
Kids are not listening

Often times when kids are not listening to one counselor it is because the other staff
members aren’t either. Everyone needs to support each other. You can’t expect kids to listen
when there are a bunch of counselors in the back talking.
Campers are being disrespectful

Like bullying and teasing, being respectful has to be role modeled by the staff all the time.
When kids are disrespectful to either an adult or another kid they have to be talked to every
time and every counselor (not that every counselor in the group or at the activity, but that
some can’t let it slide while others do the hard work). They can’t let it slide sometime and
talk about it others.
Written by Scott Arizala
[email protected] www.TheCampCounselor.com
© 2013 All Rights Reserved
New philosophy on negative behavior – roles, responsibility, & role modeling
It is your job/role to deal with bad choices or negative behavior every time it happens.
By taking this responsibility seriously you make your job easier and you are actively supporting
everyone else around you.
You are a role model. If you do it, they will do it. There is nothing that is not ok for them that is ok
for you.
Choices, Responsibility & Replacement
The whole point to behavior management for staff is to help kids have control over their choices
and to understand why negative consequences happen.
These are the three principles to remember when trying to inspire and engender kids’ control over
themselves and their behavior.
1. Choices = power & control
Give them enough choice to make a thoughtful decision, but not so many that it is stressful
(balance). When you give kids an opportunity to make thoughtful decisions, they feel like
they have more control or power. This is practice for them. They are learning what it feels
like and are more willing to see the connection between their choices and negative
behaviors (consequences).
2. Responsibility = ownership
Insist that they take ownership of good and bad choices. This is way easier said than done. It
is useless and unproductive to get into a power struggle with kids when they are insisting
that they had nothing to do with something or they “didn’t do it.” However, you can’t just let
them get out of it because they insist. The best way to handle this is to start with the above
principle and actively give them lots of appropriate choices. This will help them see the
connection and feel more in control. When they are looking to displace responsibility, let
them be right about whatever it is they are insisting on and then keep asking questions that
circle the responsibility back to them (See Problem solving and conflict management for
more suggestions). Help them develop responsibility and ownership on their own instead of
forcing it on them.
3. Replacement = development (better choices/goals)
Try to see all behaviors in pairs. If there is something going on that is not ok, there is
probably something they should be doing instead. Most adults jump to this phase without
doing all the hard work before hand. They also just tell kids what a better choice would be.
These are ineffective because kids don’t feel in control and they don’t feel responsible for
their actions. So they are not very likely to care about whatever the adult is telling them to
do. Help kids develop their own set of alternative choices. Ask them about what would
happen if they made one choice versus the other. Ask them how they are going to
remember the choices. Then support and encourage them every time they take control
and make a better choice. Written by Scott Arizala
[email protected] www.TheCampCounselor.com
© 2013 All Rights Reserved
Problem solving & conflict management
ACT is an intervention strategy for when kids do make a bad choice. It follows a distinct pattern and
will give each conversation from staff member to camper direction.
 If you get to the end and you have tried or tested all the choices but they did not solve or
mediate the issue, then you probably don’t really know what the problem is. Go back to
asking more thoughtful questions. 
 This needs to be a camper driven experience. Avoid the power struggle by telling them what
they “should” do or what they “did” wrong. Allow them to get there by themselves. 
 If they refuse to take any responsibility for their choices, keep asking them questions that
bring it back around to them
o How did you handle that?
o What did you say?
o What did that feel like?
o And how did you respond? 
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Ask questions
Choices
Try one out 

Ask Questions 
 Intelligent fact finding – what really went down? Ask a lot of questions
o Symptom or problem
o Remember – Just because X told you FIRST may only mean they got to you FIRST
o What’s really going on here? Why are they having this issue? What skill set is
underdeveloped?
 Executive functioning – making thoughtful decisions
 Language skills – labeling emotions
 Cognitive style – realistic appraisal of situations
 Social skills – making friends / empathy
 Emotion regulation – appropriate expression
o When working through a problem ask, “What do you need?” and “What do you
want?”
What Choices do they have?
 Defining choices – what can THEY do about it?
o Teach to the limitation described above – what couldn’t they do that they should of
done?
o What can they do to involve the other person or people?
o How could this problem be solved together?
Try one of the choices
Written by Scott Arizala
[email protected] www.TheCampCounselor.com
© 2013 All Rights Reserved

Did it work?
o If not, are there other choices that may work?
o Go back to asking questions – maybe the problem isn’t clear
Training Suggestions:
1. Lots of scenarios and practice. See appendix A. Put them in the scenario, allow the “camper”
to develop their character a bit and then have them try to sort through the issue using ACT.
Examples:
Bullying
 One of the first big challenges with bullying is to get the bully to take responsibility for their
actions. Remember, they are probably bullying as a tool or strategy of social skill. Point out
the obvious during the “asking questions” phase by asking about how other kids feel about
them may help.
o This brings up a major paradox about bullying. They may think (and to a point they
would be right) that acting mean or picking on some kids scores them social points.
Others actually like them more. It only seems that way. Others are actually worried
that they will be the next victim if they voice their real opinion or try to walk away.
Temporarily taking the bully out of the group can really help.
 When it comes to helping them make better choices, think back through other moments this
particular camper has shown some pro-social behavior. What worked for them? Why? Ask
them about those strategies and if they work.
Kids are not listening
 Kids may not listen if they feel like: 
o They already know what is going on
o They don’t have any choice
o It’s not cool to follow directions
o They are bored 
 While preventing this from happening to begin with by using previous suggestions is the
best, intervening when it is happening needs to happen. Reflect on the list above about what
potential skills may be under-developed combined with an assessment of why they are not
listening will lead you to try some new things and guide a discussion with the kids. 

Campers are being disrespectful 
 One reason why kids are disrespectful and generally anti-social is when their limits and
boundaries are inconsistent and when their control is out of balance (either too few or too
many choices)

o In other words, when they know they can get away with it and when they are over or
underwhelmed with the activity 

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When talking to kids about being disrespectful, concentrate on how it affects other.
When kids are having trouble taking responsibility for their actions (as they always
do) keep asking questions that bring it back around to them. How did they handle it?
How did it feel? What did they say? Etc. 
Written by Scott Arizala
[email protected] www.TheCampCounselor.com
© 2013 All Rights Reserved

Logical consequences vs. Punishment
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The most effective punishments are illegal, immoral, unhealthy, and ultimately destructive...
i.e. abuse, capital/physical punishment, demeaning or embarrassing them, leaving them
unsupervised, etc.
 Stopping a car... you could shift the car into reverse (very effective but bad technique for
stopping a car). However, you will lose your transmission and will probably damage the
integrity of the car forever. Same goes for kids...
The most effective, healthy and educational consequences rely on mutual respect and
fairness. 
Logical consequences: clear and expected, consistent, fairly distributed, are connected to or
flowing from the behavior, kids have as much opportunity for control as possible...
CONSEQUENCES CAN BE TAKEN AWAY, PUNISHMENT CANNOT 

What does DISCIPLINE mean at summer camp? Most of us think of punishment for bad behavior, it’s
active, adult to child, etc.
New Webster’s Dictionary
1. the training of the mind and character
2. a branch of learning
3. to bring under control or punish 
Or even Dictionary.com; 
1. Training expected to produce a specific character or pattern of behavior, especially training
that produces moral or mental improvement. 2. Controlled behavior resulting from disciplinary training; self-control. 3. Punishment intended to correct or train. 4. A set of rules or methods, as those regulating the practice of a church or monastic order. So most of us jump right to the second or third definition of what we are talking about. However, if
you read between the lines DISCIPLINE seems to imply; 
 Training or practice 
 Self-control 
 Systematic or routine opportunities to create a pattern of behavior 
 An understanding of outside or external rules 

These definitions seem to say that the ACTIVE part of discipline is within the individual or the
camper not necessarily the adult.

So what? It is a subtle but important distinction. As adults in the lives of children we are
not ‘doing’ the discipline, they are. Therefore we need to change our perspective of our jobs. 
Written by Scott Arizala
[email protected] www.TheCampCounselor.com
© 2013 All Rights Reserved
Old way of thinking
Adult is the disciplinarian or is
responsible
New perspective
Child is responsible for their behavior
Adults job is to catch the bad
behavior and deal with it
Child’s job is to correct bad behavior with
good behavior taught or modeled by adult
Adult is responsible for stepping in
when there is bad behavior
Adult is responsible for encouraging and
supporting (or stepping in) good behavior
and reminding about consequences for bad
behavior
Adult is in control
Child is in control
Children need different rules for
different activities
Children can generalize behavior and can
create patterns of good behavior
Training Suggestions:
1. Emphasizes your plan for encouraging and supporting good behavior – plan it out, review it
before campers come, comment on it throughout the camper experience, and create
opportunities to update it as you go. 2. Before you give them a list of possible consequences, use the behavior scenarios, examples
from the past, or other ideas and in small groups ask them to develop consequences using
the above logic and framework. They will have to “defend” their chosen consequence to the
rest of the group. 3. Discuss consistency and immediacy when working through issues. Using the above logic, why
are those two things so important? How does this help kids build a routine and systematic
approach to controlling themselves?
o Taking away favorite activities doesn’t teach kids how to control themselves, it
teaches them that you are in control. The consequence has to be related to the
bad choice.
Examples:
Bullying
 The logical consequence is being removed from the group. Bullying happens because it helps
the bully become central, when they don’t have a group or that group is changing they have
to employ new strategies. 
 By being clear and consistent with consequences when kids are bullying or teasing they
know it is a losing strategy. 


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Written by Scott Arizala
[email protected] www.TheCampCounselor.com
© 2013 All Rights Reserved
Kids are not listening
 Depending on what they are not listening to it should affect the immediate activity (i.e. rules
at the waterfront = less time in the canoes
o If the response to that last statement is, “Well won’t they just not listen all the time
to get out of whatever the activity is?” then I would say that there is something that
you need to change at the activity.
o Kids should be interested and engaged at the activities. Missing them SHOULD be an
effective consequence
 If they are not listening during a chore, duty, or other responsibility then a logical
consequence would be to finish their part while others move onto the next thing
Campers are being disrespectful
 A natural or logical consequence to being disrespectful to other kids is to be separated from
the group. 
 When a camper or group of campers are being disrespectful to a staff member it is a bit
more challenging because often times there is a lot more going on than the kids “simply
being disrespectful” 
o Try switching up what you are doing in that moment with kids, change the direction,
flow, or energy of the activity
o If it is the same counselor over and over, observe them and work with them on
strategies for communication with campers. If all else fails have them partner up with
another counselor that is well liked and respected by campers. Be careful NOT to setup a good cop / bad cop situation. The other counselor should constantly role model
being respectful to the other counselor and working as a team.
o Remember why they are being disrespectful – it is helping them to be funny, cool,
adversarial or generally create connections with the rest of the group. Change the
group dynamic by redirecting that into a task, activity or challenge. Don’t take it
personally.
o Notice who are the leaders in the group, who “starts it,” who do the others take their
cues from, who can change the flow of the group, etc.
Written by Scott Arizala
[email protected] www.TheCampCounselor.com
© 2013 All Rights Reserved
Age based discipline strategies & skills
Things to think about
 Kids are always testing boundaries and limits 
 The way they learn is through the give and take involved in the testing. 
 All behavior is expression. What is it saying? 
 Always separate the deed from the doer. What is the message we are sending to kids? 
o It is not who you are it is what you are doing 
o Mistakes and bad choices are necessary for learning and developing self control 
o Mistakes and bad choices are only bad and unhealthy if you do not try something
different because of them. You cannot do the same thing over and over again and
expect different results. 
o Encourage and support campers by insisting that if they have the best information
and the opportunity that they can and will make a good choice. 
 Your emotions often don’t help, use a calm voice and breath before you speak

Strategies
Time for a talk... Removal from the activity and direct one-on-one conversation with staff member 

Ages: All ages 
 The younger kids will need more direction through the conversation 
 Older kids should be given more latitude to come up with ideas, solutions, choices and to try
them out 
Use active listening skills (here are a few of the most effective) 
o Wait until the other person is done speaking before you speak 
o Body Language; get on kids’ level, make eye contact, nod your head, react with facial
expressions, smile, etc. 
o Paraphrase or state what you “got” from what was said 
o Ask follow-up questions 
o Ask questions to clarify what was said 
o When appropriate take notes 
o Balance time between listening and talking 
o Frame these times as ‘teachable moments’ and discuss what could be done next time
or what could have been done to avoid this.

Prepare for any difficult conversation – think about questions like: 
1) What does the camper understand or expect about their behavior? Do they know they
broke a rule? Do they know they were disrespectful? Do they know how they affected
others? 2) Has this camper received critical feedback before? If so, what worked well? What didn’t? 3) What do they need to be successful?
Written by Scott Arizala
[email protected] www.TheCampCounselor.com
© 2013 All Rights Reserved
There may not be answers to these kinds of questions, but it is best to spend a minute or two
thinking through them to have place to begin the conversation. Always remember to have any
critical discussion away from others.
Keys to a successful conversation:
1. Calmly state the facts
2. Listen carefully
3. Ask open-ended question
This approach can help campers feel empowered and motivated to resolve the conflict by changing
their own behavior.
Steps for the conversation
1) Reflect, calmly, on what the problem is (Describe how your expectations do not match the
camper’s behavior) 2) State, at the start, what you think you know about what happened 3) Ask for the camper’s version of the facts a. Listen very carefully
b. Allow them their
perspective and feelings
c. Ask about how their behavior affected others d. Ask whether or
not that kind of stuff is ok 4) State your goal for a specific behavior change
a. Ask for the campers perspective on that
change in behavior b. Discuss the campers options or choices (camper driven) 5) Ask them how they are going achieve those goals and what supports the person needs to
make this change 6) State clearly what the consequences will be if the behavior continues 7) Ask whether they have any questions or ask them to summarize to verify they understand
("Just so I'm clear that you understand, can you tell me in your own words, what the plan
is?") 8) Follow-up & after the conversation
a) Create and agree to a specific timeline
b) Provide needed support
c) Give the then a reasonable opportunity to change their behavior d. Praise the
positive behavior you see Written by Scott Arizala
[email protected] www.TheCampCounselor.com
© 2013 All Rights Reserved
Ask the Expert!
Ages: Younger kids



Make sure the kids understand that all behavior (good or bad) is a choice or collection of
several choices. Therefore, they are in complete control and have power over their behavior.
They may not like or agree with the consequences of their choices, but ultimately (if the
consequences are clear and expectations are known beforehand) they have control over
what happens (consequences) to them. Choices... you can always change your choice! 
If there are campers that have ongoing or repeated behavior problems, ask them when they
are not “in trouble” what you could do that would help them when they are “in trouble.” 
Give them control over solving the problem; use A.C.T. model, when they are still upset ask
them to calm down and collect themselves, validate their feelings or the perceived
‘unfairness’ of the situation
Redirection = distraction with a purpose 
Ages: Younger kids
1. Planned ignoring
a. Ignore the behavior, then give the camper attention when they are doing something
else or engaged in the activity.
2. Prompting
a. Offering a suggestion, starting a game, drawing attention away, or asking about a
different behavior are all examples.
3. Proximity
a. the closer you are the less likely it is that they will make poor choices 4. Give choices
a. Give them defined and specific choices when they are starting to lose control 5. Friendly challenges a. Give kids a reason to do what it is you are asking or move in the direction you want
them to. It’s more than just that you are in-charge
Time out and/or removal from the activity
Ages: Younger & Middle


The discussion should be based on what they did and how it affected those around them
If there were rules, instructions, or safety concerns involved discuss why those are there and
what would happen if we let someone do the activity without knowing the rules
Written by Scott Arizala [email protected] www.TheCampCounselor.com © 2013 All Rights
Reserved

They should only be removed from the current activity. Taking away a future activity doesn’t
help them learn how to control themselves
Fixing whatever they did (has to be their choice/idea)
Ages: Older




Apology
Clean up 
Offer to take of some responsibility 
Making it up in some other way


Displacement from the primary group 
A lot of misbehavior with older kids is based on creating an ‘in’ group or social centrality. By
removing them from the primary group you can disrupt their essential goals for the misbehavior 
Ages: Older 

 Spending a short amount of time with another group, particularly younger kids
Involvement of the Head Counselor / Supervisor / Director
Ages: All



When their behavior is violent, aggressive, dangerous, or extremely disruptive to the group a
supervisor should be involved 
The disruption or behavior should be framed in terms of the affects on others in the group
and will not be tolerated 
The rest of the group should continue on in normally scheduled activities 


Involvement of the parents or guardians

Ages: All 

 Some behaviors are so severe that parents should be alerted immediately (i.e. violence) 
 If there is persistent or continuous behavior that is disruptive to the group, parents
may have some good advice for how to handle it
 Sometimes getting parents involved helps kids see or understand the consequences of
their behavior outside of camp
Written by Scott Arizala [email protected] www.TheCampCounselor.com © 2013 All Rights Reserved 
Behavior contract
Ages: All (however, can be particular effective with older kids)


Create a written contract between the camper and the primary counselor, the unit leader or
the director. 
It should include the name of all parties, agreed upon restricted behaviors, agreed upon
solutions when conflicts do arise, potential consequences to a break in the contract, and
signatures 
o Puts control back into the hands of the camper 
o Validates the campers feelings and willingness to try 
o Makes consequences and those who are ‘in control’ seem more credible 
o Gives adults an actual course of action if behavior persists
Written by Scott Arizala
[email protected] www.TheCampCounselor.com
© 2013 All Rights Reserved
Skills
Consistency
 React fairly and justly to every incident of the behavior, refer to “rules” or expectations and
help kids understand why the behavior is unacceptable
 Be conscious of how you react to different kids... we all have favorites, its about how we
behave towards different kids
 Consistency does not imply that we cannot be flexible of change the potential
consequences... it insists that if we do we need to communicate this to our kids directly

Follow through 
 DO NOT threaten a punishment that you can’t or won’t follow through with... “One more
time and I’m sending you home!”
 Even if sitting out of an activity, talking with a director, or any other potential consequence
may seem time consuming and out of your way, by following through you build credibility
and you validate the consequence as real.

Replacement 
 It is helpful to see behaviors in “pairs” or “sets”: for every bad behavior there is a good
behavior, or something they should be doing.
 When dealing with a bad behavior it is not enough to just tell them to stop doing X, you must
immediately try and teach them what they should be doing instead.
 Helps kids learn how to problem solve, by offering a suggestion that ‘works’ or gets them
closer to what they want you can help them develop a cognitive pattern that will lead from
bad behavior to good.
Mediation – when there is a fight, argument or problem between two or more kids
 Take kids away from the rest of the group 
 Give time for everyone to cool off 
 Ask for an agreement to the following: 
o To try and solve the problem – if one or more kids cannot agree to this they probably
need more time to calm down 
o To not put each other down 
o To let the other person finish talking before you start
 Follow the A.C.T. strategy of conflict management
Written by Scott Arizala

[email protected] www.TheCampCounselor.com
© 2013 All Rights Reserved
Taking responsibility
 When kids don’t feel responsible or in control they cannot admit fully to their mistakes. 
 When processing with a camper about something that has happened, they will
frequently seek to blame others or defer responsibility in some way. 
 A great technique is just to ask “And what did you do?” “What choice did you make”
“What did you do to make that happen?” etc.
 Emphasize that they do have power and control over their choices, and a huge choice is how
you are going to react and feel about something that has happened.
Written by Scott Arizala
[email protected] www.TheCampCounselor.com
© 2013 All Rights Reserved
Appendix A
Training Camper Behavior Scenarios
1) A camper just received a letter from home and is now very homesick. What do you do?
2) On your way to the waterfront, two of your campers get into an argument and it elevates into a
fight quickly. What do you do?
3) One camper refuses to participate. She thinks the activities are dumb and "for little kids." Her
attitude seems to be getting the best of the other girls because they are starting to follow her lead.
4) One camper is really clingy with another camper. At first the other camper is ok with it or doesn’t
seem to be aware of it. After a couple of days the other camper is really annoyed by it and has come
to you asking for you to get the first camper to make some other friends and do something with
someone else. When you talk to the camper about what she likes about camp, the only thing she
says is that her "friend" is here and that all she wants to do is whatever she wants to do.
5) One camper seems to isolate themselves. He sits out, doesn’t engage the other campers, and
when he does it's really awkward. The other campers are starting to make fun of him.
6) You have a really awkward camper in your unit. He tries really hard to interact with the other
campers, but every time he does it is awkward and weird. The other campers feel annoyed by him
and make fun of him behind his back.
7) A camper won't go to sleep. This is the first time she has been away from home and nothing
seems to work. She defies your directions to stay in her cabin and when she does she keeps the
other campers up by talking really loud, turning the lights on, etc.
8) A camper has become super clingy with you. They won't leave your side and refuses to
participate when you are not at the same activity. She even has a hard time when you are working
with other campers in the same activity.
9) A camper has random complaints about "feeling sick." You have taken him to the Infirmary a few
times but there really isn't anything wrong with him. You notice it the most at dinner time and at
bedtime. What do you suspect is going on? How can you handle it?
10) A camper complains about not feeling well right before an activity. You let them sit out of the
activity and then they feel better when it is over. You notice it again that afternoon.
Written by Scott Arizala
[email protected] www.TheCampCounselor.com
© 2013 All Rights Reserved
11) One camper in your unit uses a lot of profanity. You have to constantly remind him of what is
appropriate at camp. You over here him talking about sex/drugs/alcohol at home with some of the
other campers during rest hour.
12) A camper refuses to go to the next activity. He sits down and won't respond to you or get up.
13) There has been an argument in the cabin. You are trying to talk with one camper and the other
camper keeps interrupting.
14) One of your campers always wants to win. They have just lost a game and are whining and going
on about how everything sucks.
15) One of the campers in your Unit is always trying to leave the group. It seems like they are trying
to make it difficult to come up with a group consensus, and when they don’t get their way they just
take off.
16) While at archery you are at the front line helping one of the campers aim. Another camper
points the bow at you and laughs like it is a joke.
17) One of your campers decides to paint their nose orange when you are A&C
18) One of your
campers decides that today is going to be their personal pajama day
20) One of your campers refuses to take a shower. You have let it slide a couple of times but now he
is beginning to smell and you are concerned about his hygiene.
21) You find one of your campers destroying a camp sign.
22) On your way back from the Waterfront you find one of the campers that was in the group ahead
of you peeing off the road.
23) One of your campers has been masturbating in the bathroom in a less than discrete way
24) Several of your campers are having a hard time transitioning to bed. The last two nights they
seem to be clowning around and get riled up right at bedtime
Written by Scott Arizala
[email protected] www.TheCampCounselor.com
© 2013 All Rights Reserved