GENDERED COMMUNICATION
PRACTICES
“Communication between men and women can be like
cross cultural communication, prey to a clash of
conversational styles” Deborah Tannen (1990)
Caveats
• “Gender” and “Sex” are not the same.
• Gender is not a yes/no question.
• Issues of the “margins”
Freudian Identification Theory
• Identification with same-sex parent model
– Male development stems from defensive
identification (fear of retaliation from a powerful
figure
– Female development stems from the anaclitic
(Fear of Loss)
• Freud’s theories are fraught with sexist,
shoddy methodology
Social Interaction Theories
• Gender is shaped through our interactions with others.
• Focus on a mechanism by which individuals acquire
gender identity
– Socialization – the process by which children acquire
the values and behaviors seen as appropriate for
their gender. (More in labs)
• Examples of S.I.T. include Social Learning Theory and
Cognitive Development Theories
Social Learning Theory
Same-sex (Mother and daughter) models at home and in
the media provide reinforcement for gender-appropriate
behaviors.
Cognitive Development Theory
 A child’s concept of gender develops in stages until five
or six years of age.
 Gender constancy is attained at a specific point during
developments, when this occurs, the child’s role shifts
from one of passive receiver of gender to one of active
seeker of reinforcement.
 Identification with their same sex parent
Social Role Theories
• Social Role Theory – a set of behavior patterns that
define the expected behavior for individuals in a given
position or status.
– Symbolic interaction – individuals develop their view
of self from their perception of the expectations of
significant others.
– Expectations of appropriate behavior are
communicated by feedback.
Summation of Social Interaction
Theories of Gender
• Social Learning Theory
• Cognitive Developmental Theory
• Social Role Theory
Moral Voices Theory
• Early social environment is experienced differently by
male and female children.
• Female identity formations takes place in the context of
an ongoing relationship with their mothers
• Males must separate psychologically from their mothers
in order to define themselves as masculine.
Moral Voices Theory
• Male gender identity is threatened by intimacy while
female gender identity is threatened through
separation.
• Men have problems with relationships, women have
troubles with differentiation.
• Gilligan has been critiqued for advocating a polarized
approach to gender: males follow an ethic of justice and
women follow an ethic of care. Gilligan argues that they
are not mutually exclusive.
Woman’s Speech
• For Most Women Communication is:
– to establish and maintain relationships
– conversation is for sharing and learning about
others
– Talk is the essence of relationships
Characteristics of Women’s
Speech
•
•
•
•
•
•
Equality
Showing Support
Relationship
Conversational Maintenance
Inclusivity
Tentativeness
MEN’S SPEECH
General Tendencies
• Goal of talk is exerting control, preserving
independence and enhancing status.
• Conversation is the arena for proving oneself and
negotiating prestige
Characteristics of Male Speech
–
–
–
–
–
–
–
Show Knowledge, Skill, and Ability
Advice
Instrumentality
Conversational Dominance
Absolute, Assertive Talk
Abstract Talk
Less Responsive
Talking about Troubles
• Woman disappointed in not getting job
– Man says, “You shouldn’t feel bad. Lots of people
don’t get jobs they want”
• She thinks, he belittles her experience
• He thinks, he is showing respect by bolstering
her independence
• Man disappointed is not getting job
– Woman says, “Are you okay” What’s bothering
you?”
• He thinks this points out his vulnerability
• She probes to show she cares
RELATIONSHIP TALK
• WOMEN
–
–
–
–
It’s going fine if there is talk
Talk is a process to sustain relationship
Talk is a way to show closeness
“We need to talk,” to affirm our caring
• MEN
–
–
–
–
It’s going fine if there is no need to talk
Talk is to solve problems
Talk indicate a problem
Duck when she says, “we need to talk”
THE END
Based on Julia Wood’s book Gendered Lives