Mike Von der Porten
[email protected]
1815 Manor Drive
Santa Rosa, CA 95403
(707) 545-7520
www.WinePi.com
Listening to
Learn
Let’s talk about
a recent trip or vacation!
•Speakers - How did the
reaction of your listener
affect you?
•Listeners - How did your
speaker respond to
listening behavior?
Why is Listening a Key Skill
of Leadership?
• Listening is a primary means for
connecting with other people.
Why is Listening a Key Skill
of Leadership?
• Listening is a primary means for
connecting with other people.
• Listening provides the means to
make decisions and solve problems.
“Seek first to
understand,
then to be
understood”
Steven Covey, The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People
Two Parts of Effective Listening:
Active Listening
Empathetic Listening
Two Parts of Effective Listening:
Active Listening
Reflects what a person is saying
to confirm comprehension
Empathetic Listening
Two Parts of Effective Listening:
Active Listening
Reflects what a person is saying
to confirm comprehension.
Empathetic Listening
Is a sincere attempt on the part
of the listener to understand, in
depth, what a speaker is saying
Empathetic Listening requires
listeners to...
• Put themselves in the speakers
place.
Empathetic Listening requires
listeners to...
• Put themselves in the speakers place.
• Imagine things from the speaker’s
point of view.
Empathetic Listening requires
listeners to...
• Put themselves in the speakers place.
• Imagine things from the speaker’s
point of view.
• Try to understand how the speaker
feels.
Exercise in
Effective
Listening
ROLE PLAY
HOW DID WE DO?
Listeners should always strive to create
a
positive present
as opposed to
a
negative past
Listening is the
key element in
giving
and
receiving
feedback
Tips on Giving Feedback
• Be HELPFUL
Tips on Giving Feedback
• Be HELPFUL
• Is recipient open to feedback? (ask!)
Tips on Giving Feedback
• Be HELPFUL
• Is recipient open to feedback? (ask!)
• Deal only with changeable behavior
Tips on Giving Feedback
•
•
•
•
Be HELPFUL
Is recipient open to feedback? (ask!)
Deal only with changeable behavior
Deal with specifics, not generalities
Tips on Giving Feedback
•
•
•
•
•
Be HELPFUL
Is recipient open to feedback? (ask!)
Deal only with changeable behavior
Deal with specifics, not generalities
Describe behavior -- do not judge it
Tips on Giving Feedback
•
•
•
•
•
•
Be HELPFUL
Is recipient open to feedback? (ask!)
Deal only with changeable behavior
Deal with specifics, not generalities
Describe behavior -- do not judge it
Describe the impact on you
Tips on Giving Feedback
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
Be HELPFUL
Is recipient open to feedback? (ask!)
Deal only with changeable behavior
Deal with specifics, not generalities
Describe behavior -- do not judge it
Describe the impact on you
Accept your responsibility
Tips on Giving Feedback
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
Be HELPFUL
Is recipient open to feedback? (ask!)
Deal only with changeable behavior
Deal with specifics, not generalities
Describe behavior -- do not judge it
Describe the impact on you
Accept your responsibility
Check understanding
You can give caring feedback
without a good technique,
but the slickest technique in the
world will not hide a lack of
caring.
Tips on Receiving Feedback
• Seek Feedback
Tips on Receiving Feedback
• Seek Feedback
• Listen Carefully
Tips on Receiving Feedback
• Seek Feedback
• Listen Carefully
• Listen actively
Tips on Receiving Feedback
• Seek Feedback
• Listen Carefully
• Listen actively
• Listen empathetically
Tips on Receiving Feedback
• Seek Feedback
• Listen Carefully
• Listen actively
• Listen empathetically
• Notice how you are feeling
Recap