The War of the Worlds Farmer Jim Farmer Eli Narrator General Boggins Major Bing Pilot (Alien robots) Zorg Zafron Zig Ladies and gentleman, we present “The War of the Worlds” Scene 1, in the countryside near London. Sound effect: Cows mooing, sheep bleating, birds singing etc. Farmer Jim: Good morning Eli, how are you? Farmer Eli: Fine thank you Jim, and you? Farmer Jim: Fine, thank you. What a beautiful day. Sound effect: Spaceship landing. Farmer Eli: What’s that? Farmer Jim, Farmer Eli: Farmer Jim: It´s a spaceship! Look, the door is opening. Sound effect: Door of spaceship slowly opening, electronic noises, humming etc. Farmer Eli: Look! Something is coming out. Sound effect: Electronic noises, humming, heavy slow footsteps. Zorg: Beep, beep, beep. Where are we? Zig: This is the planet Earth. Zafron: Beep, beep, beep. Can I go to the toilet? Zig: No, you cannot go to the toilet. We are here to take over the planet, beep, beep. Farmer Jim, Farmer Eli: Hello, are you friendly. Zorg, Zafron, Zig: Beep, beep, beep. No! Attack! Attack! Sound effect: Laser guns and rockets firing, explosions etc as the robots attack. Farmer Jim, Farmer Eli: Narrator: Ahhh! Call the army! Scene 2, in General Boggins´ office. Sound effect: Telephone ringing. General: Hello, this is General Boggins. Farmer Eli: General, there are alien robots! They are attacking! General: What! Robots are attacking? Where are you? Farmer Eli: London. Sound effect: Knock on door, door opening and footsteps entering. Major Bing: General Boggins, robots are attacking New York, Delhi and Rio. General: This is terrible. We need aeroplanes, tanks, soldiers ….. and sandwiches. Major Bing: Sandwiches? General: Yes, I’m hungry. Narrator: Scene 3, in the countryside, near London. Sound effect: Explosions, lasers firing etc. Farmer Eli: Can you see the Army? Dominic Streames efltheatreclub.co.uk © 2011 1
Farmer Jim: No, I can’t. I can see a lot of robots attacking the town. Farmer Eli: Look, I can see some aeroplanes in the sky. Sound effect: Aeroplane flying. Pilot: This is Aeroplane 1, this is Aeroplane 1, I can see the robots. General: Aeroplane 1, this is General Boggins. Shoot the robots! Sound effect: Guns fire and explosions, then space ship noises. Pilot: This is Aeroplane 1, I can see some spaceships. Sound effect: Spaceship noises and then lasers firing, then explosion as Aeroplane 1 is hit. Pilot: I am hit, I am hit. I am going to eject. Sound effect: Plane dives then crashes. Farmer Eli, Jim: Look, a parachute. It´s the pilot. Are you OK? Pilot: Yes, I am fine. We have to stop the robots. Sound effect: Car arriving and screeching to a halt, then footsteps running. General: Hello, I am General Boggins. Major: I am Major Bing. Zig: You cannot stop us! Zorg. No, you cannot stop us! Zafron: No one can stop us! Pilot, Farmer Jim, Farmer Eli: Major Bing: What are we going to do? I don’t know. Atchoo! (sneezes). General Boggins: Bless you. Farmer Eli: Have you got a cold? Major Bing: Yes, I have. Farmer Eli: I have got an idea. Give me your hanky. Major Bing: Here you are. Farmer Eli: We can put this tissue inside the robot spaceship. Cover us. Sound effect: Footsteps running, gun fire, lasers firing, explosions, then footsteps. Farmer Jim: We put the tissue in the spaceship. Now we wait. Zig: You cannot stop us! Zorg. We are strong, we are fast, we aaaaatchoo! Atchoo! Zafron: Atchoo! Atchoo! What is happening? What is happening? Zig, Zorg, Zafron: Oh no! Errrrrrr (robots die). Farmer Jim: We put a virus in the spaceship computer. We gave the robots a cold! Farmer Eli: The robots are from another planet. They have no immunity to our viruses. Sound effect: Telephone ringing. General: Hello, this is general Boggins. What! All the robots are dying! Hooray. Everyone: Hooray, hooray, the end. Dominic Streames efltheatreclub.co.uk © 2011 2