Nowhere Men: A Semester of Outsiders
An Anthology of Essays, Stories and Poems
Grade 10 Composition -- September 2012 to January 2013 – Sections 166 & 167
Paul D. Schreiber High School -- Port Washington, New York
Students: Nicole Alvarado, Brittany Arnett, Rita Browne, Michael Colonna, Ana Espinoza,
Mariam Gejadze, Suzanne Gil, Erin Gilmore, Tyler Hamilton, Austin Hanover, Samantha Hoffman,
Noah Hirsch, Aimee Howard, Adam Hussain, Carmen Kam, Erik Klug, Krista Ledins, Ivan Lerner,
Olivia Mann, Trevor Marks, Caitlin Meagher, Elizabeth Muratore, Crystal Ren, Samuel Reisman,
Caitlyn Salstein, Charles Scharf, Sarah Sigman, Jacob Silverman, Sarah Silverstein, Taylor
Silvester, Kathryn Spradling, Yuichiro Uzu, Roberto Vides, Arielle Waller, David Wolmark
Teacher: Sara Brock
Doesn't have a point of view,
Knows not where he's going to,
Isn't he a bit like you and me?
--John Lennon
Table of Contents
The Best of Twitterature
Nicole Alvarado
Allie
Brittany Arnett
Allie Caulfied
Reilly Beckstrand
When the truth finds itself in the company
of inexplicable circumstances
Rita Browne
Shrek
Mike Colonna
The Unlikely Likenesses of Holden and Paul
Ana Espinoza
Allie’s Mitt
Becoming “The Catcher in the Rye”
Mariam Gejadze
Sunny
Erin Gilmore
Limitless
Tyler Hamilton
Not Just a Baseball Mitt
Austin Hanover
We Have a Big Day Tomorrow!
Noah Hirsch
Holden and Goliath
Samantha Hoffman
Tribes
Aimee Howard
Sunny
Tribes
Adam Hussain
Horowitz
Carmen Kam
Royal Pain in the Ass
Erik Klug
Affection or Care
Krista Ledins
Sincerely, Scotch and Coke
Olivia Mann
Summer Baseball, July 18, 1946
Trevor Marks
If Paul Were Gay
Caitlin Meagher
Jane
Elizabeth Muratore
Holden Caulfield: Relationship 101
I Am Who I Am
Sam Reisman
Fencing Coach
Crystal Ren
Something to Root For
An Abundance of Fear
Caitlyn Salstein
Mr. Antolini
Tribes
Charlie Scharf
The Graffiti
Sarah Sigman
My Tribes
Jacob Silverman
Holden Caulfield is “The Catcher in the Rye”
Sarah Silverstein
The Mitt
Troublemaker
Dreams
Taylor Silvester
O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree
Kat Spradling
Hopes and Dreams
Yuichiro Uzu
I’m Catcher in the Rye! Who are you?
Roberto Vides
Allie Caulfield
Arielle Waller
Dear Holden
David Wolmark
The Museum Exhibits
Cover photo by Noah Hirsch (“I am Nobody – Who are You?”—Emily Dickinson)
The Best of Twitterature
(excerpts from our blog)
Ralph and Jack fighting again! Just hope I never lose my glasses. #IslandLife
#NotParadise
Whyy cant we all focus on getting rescued! jack wont even give me my damn glasses
back! #cantsee wait, is that a boulder?? #crap #ohwell
@RalphTHEman456 haven't posted anything in a while #notmyfault, its hard to find good
service on the island, my problem is I've posted about 10 tweets saying I'm stranded on
this island and nobody has done anything about it, #neednewfriends #stranded
@asherlev: drawing is one of many ways to express yourself... i just happen to find it the
best way #expressyourself #drawing
@asherlev My parents saw my new painting today, they weren't happy with it
#BrooklynCrucifixion #angryparents #moving back to Paris
Girl mysteriously died. My house burnt down. Burnt my best friend alive. Wife left me.
City got nuked. What a week. #bored #nothingtodo
#wrong#Don't burn books#stop#Books are important we need to keep them they provide tons
of information on everything.#Realization
Should of said hi to that guy mowing the lawn in my grandmother's neighborhood
#youneverknowwhatmighthappen"
This therapist is more depressing than me #getmeoutofhere"
"Guess I'm going to college after all #brownhereicome #byebyemidwest
Teaching H.S biology when I was arrested for teaching evolution. My students deserve
to know the truth, not the crap the preacher has filled them with. Sleeping in the
county jail tonight, food sucks.
Can't wait to party at the Fireman's Hall! It's going to be an awesome night!I hope I get a
dance with Antonia! #sneak #out #myantonia
@EdBoone at the police station, would much rather be naming every country in the
world, their capitals and prime numbers #christopherbooneproblems
#whokilledwellington?
1
Allie
by Nicole Alvarado
I was on the field with my team
I had nothing to do
It was my turn
All I had were the poems on my mitt
Next thing I knew it was my turn to bat
I hit the ball
It was the moment, my moment
I scored a home run!
I looked into the crowd
I could see Holden and Phoebe
Jumping with excitement
2
Allie Caulfield
by Brittany Arnett
I started talking, sort of out loud, to Allie…I keep saying to him, ‘Okay. Go home
and get your bike and meet me in front of Bobby’s house. Hurry up.’
I keep thinking about it anyway, when I get very depressed. --J.D. Salinger
Don’t worry Bro – keep walking,
I won’t let you disappear, I’ll keep you safe.
Don’t worry about that time,
When you didn’t let me come with you bike riding,
I felt excluded,
But I knew you still loved me.
Remember that time,
When we pulled that prank on D.B.?
That was awesome. We make a great team.
And remember when we played baseball on the porch together?
Ah, I smashed you,
Until we broke the window and mom yelled at us, of course.
But Bro, you know,
I’m really glad you kept my mitt.
I know you’re hurting,
But calm yourself, pull yourself together.
Try hard, and I’ll always be here to help you along the way.
And when you accomplish everything
You want to accomplish,
And it’s time for your end,
I’ll be here waiting for you.
3
When the truth finds itself in the company
of inexplicable circumstances
by Reilly Beckstrand
When the subject of a discussion will never mean more than just a good time to
an audience, a good bend of the truth can really enhance their journey through your
narrative. I’m talking about things like distant relatives of yours that the most daring
adventurer on earth will never meet, or things that took place while you were on
vacation when no one else was around; things that cannot be confirmed by anybody
other than God. Like that cat that your great uncle has, why can't it be morbidly obese
and have a fond love for your face as you sleep? And why couldn’t a boring old dog walk
turn into a fast paced sprint for dear life from a rabid raccoon?
That happened to me once. No really, it did. It was a clear day, hardly a cloud in
the sky and my mom asked me to take a walk with the dog. Jogging and prancing, we
frolicked to our hearts content, but that all soon ended. There was this very low tree at
the corner of the block that my house was on, and it was always a tad fishy to me. On
that day, it was especially fishy to my dog as well. As he was furiously sniffing the tar
out of that tree I was content to enjoy the scenery, and I soon found myself gazing up at
a frothy-mouthed raccoon right over my head! I have to admit, I let out a small yelp and
a curse, which didn’t ease the mood of the masked ruffian I found hanging over my head
like the blade of a guillotine. Sprinting, panting, my dog and I could barely out run the
deranged bugger! More than once, I felt as if my life would be ended by a mere garbage
prowler, how pathetic! After making the amazing leap over my fence with my four
legged compatriot in arms, we hurried to the porch and slammed our front door so
hard, I felt the doorstop budge a little bit. From that day forward, I always avoid that
accursed tree. I swear this happened, and if you have any doubts about my tall tale, feel
free to ask my dog, He'll set you straight.
4
Shrek
by Rita Browne
Society as a whole places a great deal of importance on appearances. When the
way someone looks does not fit society’s standards, they can be come and outcast in the
eyes of others as well as themselves. In the movie Shrek, the main character is
ostracized because of the way he looks. Shrek, the ogre, lives in a swap that is
completely isolated by the other members of his fairy tale community. Because Shrek is
large and green and odd looking, he is perceived as a monster and the townspeople feel
the need to chase him down with pitchforks. When he first meets and is befriended by
Donkey he states, “I'm an ogre! You know, "Grab your torch and pitchforks!" Doesn't
that bother you?” He is so surprised that someone would want to be friends with him
which shows that by being deemed unfit by society, it has made Shrek feel like he is
worthless. A second quote from the movie is, “What’s that? It’s Hideous!” Lord Farquad
shows that Shrek is seen as seen as someone who could not possibly have feelings and
even though Shrek deflects it, as he travels through the movie with his companions it
becomes apparent that he truly does believe this himself and is hurt by it. The burden
of being seen as an outcast his whole life is especially apparent when Shrek begins to
fall in love with Fiona. He is ready to tell her how he feels after he believes that she
accepts him for who he is. But, when he hears her speaking about a particularly ugly
figure and asking who could love an ugly ogre. He does not understand that the princess
is also an outcast and thinks that she is talking about him. The quote that makes it most
apparent that he has been outcast be society and is, “like you said, who could ever love a
hideous, ugly beast?” The way that Shrek feels throughout the movie is relatable to
everyone at one point in their life. When people feel that they are worthless because
they are different looking, they tend to separate themselves from others and keep to
themselves. Being outcast by a community because of how you appear is something
that everyone goes through and is represented through comedy in the lines of Shrek.
5
The Unlikely Likenesses of Holden and Paul
by Mike Colonna
The mark of the immature man is that he wants to die nobly for a cause.
The mark of the mature man is that he wants to live humbly for one.-- Wilhelm Stekel
Society is often viewed from a different lens when its spectators are on the
periphery. Holden Caulfield, the main character in The Catcher in the Rye by J.D.
Salinger, is one of these spectators, repeatedly criticizing the “phonies” that surround
him. Throughout the novel, he feels a constant need to explain his superiority over
others by emphasizing their flaws. His rebellious inner attitude toward society is not
unlike Paul, from the short story “Paul’s Case” by Willa Cather, who desperately seeks
an escape from the “unworthy” world in which he lives. These two characters are alike
in many regards, both sharing a keen awareness of their presence in society’s periphery,
as well as similar states of mind that influence their reactions to this society. However,
the two also differ in key areas, ultimately separating the reasons why Holden survives
his existential crisis and Paul does not.
As outsiders looking in, Holden and Paul both take to becoming social critics
inside their heads, conveniently overemphasizing the flaws of others for most of their
respective stories, while hardly touching on the flaws of themselves. Their ways of
expressing their criticisms differ slightly, as Paul openly mocks his teachers and has
more blunt complaints about Cordelia Street, while Holden is more introverted and
never really outwardly expresses his distaste for the others around him unless they
really anger him. However, the origin of their criticisms is the same; they both view
their surroundings as repulsive and trapping. An example of Paul’s complaints can be
seen when he describes his home on Cordelia Street: “The nearer he approached the
house, the more absolutely unequal Paul felt to the sight of it all: his ugly sleeping
chamber; the old bathroom with the grimy zinc tub, the cracked mirror, the dripping
spigots; his father at the top of the stairs, his hairy legs sticking out from his nightshirt,
his feet thrust into carpet slippers…” Paul’s hatred of his own home is clearly expressed
in this passage, as, to him, it is inferior to who he is in every way. His disgust gives the
house a feeling of unworthiness, and his acute awareness of his environment, coupled
with his almost rambling complaints, are very reminiscent of Holden.
Holden’s social criticism is just as condescending, even toward insignificant
things, like a woman who cries at a “phony” movie that he watches: “She had this little
kid with her that was bored as hell and had to go to the bathroom, but she wouldn’t take
him. She kept telling him to sit still and behave himself. She was about as kindhearted as
6
a goddam wolf” (Salinger 139-140). Always aware and judgmental, Holden never misses
an opportunity to emphasize the people that annoy and anger him. This scrutinizing
disposition is reflected many times in both stories, and helps label these two characters
as social critics, spiteful of their surrounding environments, searching for something
more meaningful in their lives.
Holden and Paul’s social criticisms, however, are only byproducts of their similar
states of mind. Both of these characters are resentful toward the worlds in which they
live because they feel trapped by them, and their criticisms are merely defense
mechanisms. Peace constantly eludes them, and as their stories go on, they continually
get more and more depressed, consumed by the inability to escape these worlds. After a
police search forces Paul to leave his haven in New York, he reflects on this inability to
escape as he plans his suicide on the train tracks: “The carnations in his coat were
drooping with cold, he noticed; all their red glory over…It was only one splendid breath
they had, despite their brave mockery at the winter outside the glass. It was a losing
game in the end, it seemed, this revolt against the homilies by which the world is run”
(Cather 214). At this point, Paul has given up all hope and resistance against his return
to Cordelia Street. He refuses to live his life in a place where he feels he cannot express
himself, and takes the only route that seems possible to him: suicide. Holden also feels
overwhelmed by society, and by the continual change that occurs in his life. He’s curious
about the ones who can adapt to a changing world, like the ducks in the lake at Central
Park: “…What it was, it was partly frozen and partly not frozen. But I didn’t see any
ducks around. I walked all around the whole damn lake–I damn near fell in once, in fact–
but I didn’t see a single duck. I thought maybe if there were any around, they might be
asleep or something near the edge of the water, near the grass and all. That’s how I
nearly fell in. But I couldn’t find any” (Salinger 154). Because the lake water begins to
freeze, the ducks have adapted a strategy to leave it and then come back when it thaws.
Holden envies this ability, not being able to adapt to his changing life, and feeling
overwhelmed and even suicidal in the process. Holden and Paul are indeed socially
critical, but this is only because they are resentful toward their feelings of being
trapped.
Holden and Paul, while they are very alike, have some key differences that
ultimately separate them from their respective fates. Paul, in Holden’s eyes, would be
considered very “phony,” as his preference for artificiality and even dishonesty are
evident throughout “Paul’s Case.” When Cather writes, “Perhaps it was because, in
Paul’s world, the natural nearly always wore the guise of ugliness, that a certain element
of artificiality seemed necessary in beauty,” she describes Paul as not enjoying the true
nature of people and things, and choosing to be ignorantly blissful in his life. Due to the
fact that Paul also “cheats” his way through life by rushing to wealth instead of working
7
for it, as well as pretending to be someone he’s not by trying to fit in with upper-class
men, he loses all sense of honesty. Holden, on the other hand, prefers the true nature of
people, and wishes there were fewer phonies, like Paul, in the world. Toward the end of
The Catcher in the Rye, Mr. Antolini, an old English teacher of Holden, gives him advice
that can help sort out this divide between Holden and Paul’s personalities: “‘The mark of
the immature man is that he wants to die nobly for a cause, while the mark of the
mature man is that he wants to live humbly for one’” (Salinger 188). Paul is the
“immature man” Mr. Antolini describes, so vehemently opposed to Cordelia Street and
its lack of extravagance that, to save himself from facing it again, he commits suicide, as
if trying to send a message. Holden, while at first following along a similar path of the
immature man, changes his ways by the end of the novel by taking initiative of his life
instead of merely complaining about it. Without Mr. Antolini’s advice, Holden probably
would’ve never come to reflect upon his life and attitude. Paul never received these
words, and was too abrupt in his decision to take time to reflect on anything. The
rashness or lack rashness of their decisions, as well as their stance on artificiality, are
two traits that separate these two characters from, in their cases, life and death.
Outsiders in literature are a very common theme, but few characters offer the
critical mindset Holden and Paul take on. Their frustration about their “losing game”
against “the homilies by which the world is run” causes them to point out the cracks and
flaws in society and its people, always guarded and aware emotionally. Also, the fact
that The Catcher in the Rye and “Paul’s Case” take place over relatively short time
periods is evidence of the rashness and heightened emotions of both characters for
most of their stories. Fortunately, Holden is able to catch himself before his “great fall”
that Mr. Antolini warns him about, while Paul isn’t so lucky. The attitudes and emotions
of both characters, however, are not completely unrealistic to teenagers today. Perhaps
the fact that these two characters are so similar, despite the fact that they were written
about 50 years apart, is a testament to the existential crisis we all experience as
teenagers, no matter what time period.
8
Allie’s Mitt
by Ana Espinoza
So what I did, I wrote about my brother Allie's baseball mitt. It was a very descriptive subject.
It really was.--J.D. Salinger
Here I sit, alone and worn.
When they see me they think of him,
And push me away.
But I made him happy, so why is that?
His little hand is my only match,
and it always will be.
I’ve got his Frost and his Dickinson tattooed in green ink.
He loved that one poem, how did it go?
Hope is the thing with feathers.
I remember his laughter,
As bright as his hair.
I grew creased and faded, but I saw him through every game,
Home to second and back.
I’m a good quality mitt, you know.
But now here I sit, untouched.
Doomed to this dark attic,
And dust obscures his beloved words.
Someone, please let me know,
Why is that?
9
Becoming “The Catcher in the Rye”
by Ana Espinoza
Fictional protagonists, especially in coming-of-age novels, often embark on
personal journeys, searching either literally or metaphorically for anything from a
significant other to their very selves. In J.D. Salinger’s The Catcher in the Rye, Holden
Caulfield searches for a definite purpose in his life, whether he does so consciously or
not. Clearly, he has not found his passion at any of the schools he has attended, or
among the “phonies” that fill his life. Towards the end of the novel, Holden reveals that
he would give anything to become a “catcher in the rye”, but he leaves the reader in the
dark as to whether he ever fulfills or even tries to apply himself to this purpose after his
trip to New York. In saying that he would like to be a catcher in the rye, Holden is really
saying that he would like to help others, especially children, and protect them from his
unforgiving world. In the novel, Holden is on a quest to find a purpose, and he
eventually finds that this purpose is to become a catcher in the rye.
In The Catcher in the Rye, it is clear that Holden is searching for something, even
if the object of his search is not obvious at first, because he constantly moves from place
to place. Presumably, he leaves one place for the next when he does not find what he is
looking for. For example, Holden attends and subsequently flunks out of four schools,
even though it becomes clear that Holden could have passed his classes if he had put in
more effort. He says that the reason he left his last school, Elkton Hills, was because he
was “surrounded by phonies”, not because the curriculum was too difficult (p. 12).
Holden’s search is also exemplified in his desire to walk back to his hotel after his visit
to Ernie’s. Holden says, “I didn’t do it because I felt like walking or anything. Sometimes
you get tired of riding in taxicabs the same way you get tired of riding in elevators. All of
a sudden, you have to walk, no matter how far or how high up” (p. 88). This thought
shows the reader that Holden will not stay in the same place for long, and also that he
would rather take control of his own journey rather than let someone else, like a taxi
driver or an elevator operator, do so. Holden is clearly on a mission, even if the direction
of his quest is not so easily deciphered.
Holden’s interactions with others are also a telltale sign that he is on a personal
quest to find a purpose. Although he meanders throughout New York City without any
immediate personal ambitions, he seems continually interested in the lives of others,
almost as if he is looking to find out how others find their own motivation and purpose.
For example, Holden asks question after question at his meeting with Carl Luce at the
Wicker Bar. He also seems curious about the lives of Mr. Spencer, Mr. Antolini, and the
nuns he meets at Grand Central Station. Holden’s interest in the ducks in Central Park
10
also tells the reader that he is on a journey to find something. In conversations with the
taxi driver and Carl Luce, he expresses curiosity as to where the ducks go in the winter
when their pond freezes over. This relates to Holden’s desire to find a purpose in life
because these ducks have a direction and somewhere to go, and he wants that. He feels
that if he can figure out where the ducks go for the winter, he can then figure out what
to do with himself.
As the story progresses, the reader becomes more and more aware of exactly
what Holden is beginning to figure out about his purpose in life. A wish to help others
and be a “catcher in the rye” becomes evident in his concern for those who have less
than he does. For example, Holden is fascinated by the nuns who stand on the streets
collecting money for charity, but he also has sympathy for them. The fact that these
women “never went anywhere swanky for lunch” made him sad (p. 114). Holden also
shows compassion when he tells the reader of how, at Elkton Hills, he put his expensive
suitcases under the bed so that his roommate would not feel so embarrassed about his
older ones.
The goal of Holden’s search becomes even more apparent in his interactions with
children, especially with his younger sister, Phoebe. He wants to protect children and
their fragile innocence from the world. For example, Holden spends at least an hour
trying to remove obscene graffiti from the walls of Phoebe’s school in order prevent the
young students from seeing it and losing their innocence. He says, “Somebody’d written
‘F--- you’ on the wall. It drove me damn near crazy. I thought how Phoebe and all the
other little kids would see it, and how’d they wonder what the hell it meant, and then
finally some dirty kid would tell them – all cockeyed, naturally – and how they’d all
think about it and maybe even worry about it for a couple of days” (p. 201). Holden is
very concerned about the profanities on the walls wants to protect kids from things like
this. Holden also nears the answer to his quest when he tightens a young girl’s skates in
Central Park. The purpose that Holden was searching for was there all along – he wants
to protect and help people, especially children.
This goal is exemplified in the story of the catcher in the rye that Holden tells to
Phoebe. While visiting her at home, he tells her:
Anyway, I keep picturing all these little kids playing some game in this big field of
rye and all. Thousands of little kids, and nobody's around - nobody big, I mean except me. And I'm standing on the edge of some crazy cliff. What I have to do, I
have to catch everybody if they start to go over the cliff - I mean if they're
running and they don't look where they're going I have to come out from
11
somewhere and catch them. That's all I do all day. I'd just be the catcher in the
rye and all. I know it's crazy, but that's the only thing I'd really like to be. (173)
In this passage, Holden reveals the purpose that he was searching for. He is
willing to take risks, or stand “on the edge of some crazy cliff”, in order to protect
children and their innocence. This personal motivation stems from both events that
occurred before Holden’s narrative in the novel as well as from events that occurred
during it. Perhaps Holden has been on this mission to protect the innocent since the
death of his brother, Allie. At the time, Holden could do nothing to save his brother from
his unfortunate fate, and perhaps this is the motivation behind him now wanting to save
and protect other children. Even though he knows this is an unusual concept, he firmly
states that this is what he wants.
In The Catcher in the Rye, Holden is on a quest to find a purpose. As he takes his
whirlwind journey throughout New York City, the reader realizes that the motivation he
was looking for was there all along. Holden’s purpose in life is to protect children,
whether from losing their innocence or from a more unfortunate fate, like that of his
brother, Allie. The actions that Holden takes throughout the story, including his moving
from place to place and his interactions with other characters, show that this is the
personal meaning he was searching for. However, it remains to be seen whether Holden
actually applies himself to this purpose after the novel ends.
12
Sunny
By Mariam Gejadze
I met this guy
He seemed to be shy…
It was so weird…
We were just talking,
He was nice,
We talked about my life…
He paid me for nothing
But still not enough money…
He was little silly,
But it’s not like I cared much.
I wish the best for him
Hope he’s doing alright
13
Limitless
By Erin Gilmore
Please insert epigram-His potential is limitless.
He really is quite a clever boy.
I may be sick and worn out,
But I’ve seen this before, throughout my many years.
He refuses to look at the future
Though deep down, he may actually care
But in some cases, there really is no hope.
Some call it a lost cause,
But I know somewhere there is room to expand.
Some will need a push,
And I tried to do exactly that.
But all we can do is pray it’s a phase,
And hope for the best to come out.
For the sky is the limit,
And this boy needs to see
If he tries hard
He will truly succeed.
14
Not Just a Baseball Mitt
by Tyler Hamilton
So what I did was I wrote about my brother Allie’s baseball mitt.
--J.D. Salinger
I am the baseball mitt
So simple at first glance
But a closer look reveals that I am more than just a lousy mitt
I have the works of famous poets for you to read while you wait
My owner was no ordinary fellow-A young man everyone admired,
A brother that loved and misses him,
And I am all he has left.
15
We Have a Big Day Tomorrow!
by Austin Hanover
Mothers are all slightly insane.--J.D. Salinger
Lies have built up a reputation of being bad or harmful, but there are a handful of
times in my life that I benefited from a lie, or it made me happy.
It was April of 2002, this particular Saturday night was a lot like all of the others,
or so I thought. All was normal in the Hanover house, my sister was coloring, my father
was watching hockey, and I was learning how to make lowercase letters. I was on the
letter g, which was really stumping me, when my mom said something I would never
forget:
“Austin, tomorrow morning we will get up very early to go shopping with
mommy and daddy for some new clothes and school supplies!”
I was furious, I didn’t want the first day of my first ever spring break to be ruined
by a day of senseless and boring shopping. I did what any other little kid would do in
this moment, I cried and yelled until eventually I just sucked it up, picked out a teddy
bear, and went to sleep. I kept tossing in my sheets, dreading the day to come. As I
dozed off I began to dream about the long hours I would be wasting in a dressing room
or on an endless line. It was actually more of a nightmare, but I couldn’t escape.
Suddenly, I felt my self being shaken. I slowly opened my eyes and saw my mom trying
to wake me up at what seemed like 4 in the morning. I knew were were going shopping
early, but not THIS early!
“Austin, get dressed, we’re going to Disneyworld!”
My emotions were running wild, I was so excited that I shot right up and started
dancing. As it turns out I was never going shopping all along! That was definitely a lie
worth telling!
16
Holden and Goliath
by Noah Hirsch
Certain things they should stay the way they are. You ought to be able to stick
them in one of those big glass cases and just leave them alone. I know that's
impossible, but it's too bad anyway.—J.D. Salinger
In the biblical story David and Goliath, the underdog that is David takes on the
imposing giant Goliath. The combatants are clearly uneven, and this describes the
situation in Catcher in the Rye by J.D. Salinger perfectly. Holden goes on a journey
through New York City to figure out what his purpose is. He finds himself similar to
David, trying to take on the monstrous task of preserving innocence. Like David, he
doesn’t see he is at a disadvantage. He does find what he is looking for, and takes on the
daunting task head on. While Holden does reach his ultimate goal of finding his niche, he
learns a valuable piece of advice and warning from his former teacher Mr. Antolini along
the way.
As Holden finds himself running about New York City, readers must ask
themselves, what exactly is Holden looking for? At this intermediary stage in his life,
Holden is trying to find his place in the world and discover what his purpose is. Holden
displays his discovery of this when he is talking to Phoebe about his ambitions in life. He
tells her that he wants to stand in a field of rye where children are playing games, and
“catch everybody if they start to go over the cliff” (P.173). I interpreted this to mean that
Holden is trying to protect children’s innocence, and keep them from falling off the
metaphorical cliff to adulthood and becoming phony. Another thing to note is Holden’s
frequent social critiques. Throughout the book, Holden is judging adults left and right,
while complimenting children. This is a perfect display of his dislike for adults and love
for children. One example of Holden’s bias towards children is when he sees a poor
family come out of church, and criticizes the father of the family for looking ragged,
while complimenting the kid. He says “the kid was swell ... the whole time he kept
singing and humming “If a body catch a body coming through the rye.” He had a pretty
little voice, too” (P. 115). He also comments on how the parents are ignoring their kid,
who is almost in the middle of the street. This shows how the parents are sort of letting
go of their kid, and effectively letting him fall off the cliff to ignorance and phoniness.
Holden gets closer and naturally wants to protect the child. It also shows Holden’s niche
in the story, which is to protect the innocence of children.
Holden’s bias towards children continues most importantly with Phoebe. When
Holden sneaks into Phoebe’s room, he looks at her notebook. The notebook says on the
cover “Phoebe Weatherfield Caulfield”. Holden comments on it by saying “That killed
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me, her middle name is Josephine, for god’s sake, not Weatherfield” (p. 160). Holden
then goes on to compliment Phoebe on how funny it is that she uses many different
middle names. This is odd because if it was any other adult, Holden would brand them a
phony immediately. So, instead of criticizing Phoebe’s phoniness for using multiple
middle names, he praises her innocence for doing the same thing. This shows again that
Holden is striving to be the defender of innocence, protecting Phoebe’s childish
sincerity.
As Holden continues his journey through New York City to find who he really is,
the Catcher in the Rye, he goes to his old English teacher, Mr. Antolini. He tells Holden
that “This fall I think you’re riding for-it’s a special kind of fall, a horrible kind. The man
falling isn’t permitted to feel or hear himself hit bottom” (p. 197). This refers back to the
metaphor of being the Catcher in the Rye, because Holden doesn’t realize that he may
fall off the cliff himself, and become a phony himself. Perhaps, Holden has already fallen,
because Mr. Antolini says he won’t know when he does. This is exacerbated by the fact
that Holden is a sixteen year old boy, so he is very near adulthood. Mr. Antolini says this
to Holden because he sees that Holden is bouncing around between schools and needs
to settle down, or else he’ll fall and become a lonely, lying, ‘phony’. So, Holden learns
from Mr. Antolini’s advice, and takes precautions to protect himself from his own fall
from innocence. This is revealed late in the book when Holden says that he plans on
attending a new school, and staying there.
Overall, the quest narrative that Salinger portrays shows Holden trying to find
his niche, which he discovers is to be the Catcher in the Rye. Holden wants to protect the
innocence of children, and keep them from becoming phony. I find this ironic, because
even though he didn’t say to what extent, Holden states that he was molested as a child,
and most would think this would revoke Holden’s innocence, and render him a phony.
Maybe Holden has fallen off the cliff himself, which Mr. Antolini advises Holden to watch
out for. He tells Holden he won’t know when he’s fallen. Goliath may have beaten him,
and he doesn’t even know it. Furthermore in speculation, I believe he came to New York
City at this awkward time, even though he runs the risk of facing his parents after
getting kicked out of Pencey, to be closer with Phoebe and ensure that his favorite child
in the field of Rye does not fall from innocence. However, despite Holden’s best efforts,
adulthood is inevitable, and therefore phoniness is inevitable. Holden’s niche is a lost
cause, and this is shown in his general directionless and unsuccessful venture
throughout the city. So, Holden does find what he is looking for, but also learns a
valuable lesson in Mr. Antolini’s advice, but it’s all in vain as what he is trying to prevent
is imminent.
18
Tribes
by Samantha Hoffman
Thank you, Sherman Alexie
…Sure, I was a New Yorker. I belonged to that tribe. But I also belonged to the tribe of
Americans. And the tribe of gymnasts. And the tribe of students.
And the tribe of teenage girls
And the tribe of daughters
And the tribe of non-stop gum chewers
And the tribe of hockey fans
And the tribe of musicians
And the tribe of nervous wrecks
And the tribe of JAPS
And the tribe of obsessive cell phone users
And the tribe of good friends
And the tribe of overly sarcastic people
It was a great moment.
And I that’s when I knew I wasn’t alone.
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Sunny
by Aimee Howard
"Ya got a watch on ya?" she said. She didn't care what the hell my name was,
naturally.
"Hey, how old are you, anyways?"
"Me? Twenty-two."
"Like fun you are."
--J.D. Salinger
Boy, I can’t believe that all just happened. One hour. One freaking hour and that’s all it
took for that little perv to get to me. How did anyone ever let him buy my time? He’s so
young, not ready for all this. Am I worthless? Am I vulgar? What’s my purpose here?
Why are these regrets building up? Why did it take this boy to hit me? I’m not worth
this. I’m worth so much more if I put myself out there. Why did I ever let myself get into
this? No. Stop this Sunny. You are useless. You were meant for this. It wouldn’t have
taken this long for you to realize that if it was true. Ugh the agony, these flashbacks.
20
Tribes
by Aimee Howard
Thank you, Sherman Alexie
So I may belong to the motherland, Russia.. I’m not doubting that at all. But I also
belonged to religion of those funny hat wearing- bearded men. I was not only Russian,
but I was also a Jew. In addition, I belonged to the group of musicians, those ones that
hash tag #bandgeekproblems after every tweet with their new YouTube cover video
they post. And to the group of tennis players who hate Federer with all our hearts
because we are so jealous. But I also belonged to many other groups...
To the group of purple lovers.
To the group of diehard hockey fans.
To the group of optimists.
To the group of coffee addicts.
To the group of anxiety-prone people.
To the group of daddy’s girls who’s dad isn’t biological/
To the group of JAPS.
To the group of people who changed themselves for the better.
To the group of twitter addicts.
And to the group of never ending pizza eaters.
It was a whole new world right in front of my eyes.
And that’s when I knew I was never, ever really alone.
21
Horowitz
by Adam Hussain
The fish don’t go no place... They stay... Right in the goddamn lake.
--J.D. Salinger
There have been many crazy people in my cab, but not like that one odd kid that was in
here the other day. He was keen on going on and on about the ducks in the pond. I was
taken back when he talked to me since most people don’t give much thought to me. I
thought he was weird when he asked me about the ducks, why me out of all people
didn’t the kid have anyone he to go to. I answered the kid so he would shut up since I
was confused and nervous about the kid asking me many more weird inquiries. I should
really be more careful with the many people I let into my cab especially at weird times
in the night.
22
Royal Pain in the Ass
By Carmen Kam
Girls. You never know what they're going to think.--J.D. Salinger
How dare he,
Spout such nonsense then refer to me?
Well he just had to go off course,
Prattling off as usual without,
Paying attention to me.
So what if I fancy someone else,
Do I belong to you?
And just when I was proper,
You call me a pain in the ass.
Calling at some ungodly hour,
For God’s sake talking to my grandma,
While stiff drunk as a pole.
Who cares about the Christmas tree?
Certainly not me if this,
Is all the trouble it takes for it.
What happened,
To cause such chaos within you.
My thoughts have been confirmed,
That I am definitely not the one for you,
Nor can I handle you.
So go on with your life,
And everything will be yesterday.
23
Affection or Care
by Erik Klug
I have a feeling that you’re riding for some kind of terrible, terrible fall. But I don’t
honestly know what kind.--J.D. Salinger
I sit there still sipping out of my highball
Watching this young man in Holden
Worrying about this one.
He needs better care,
Unaware of his potential.
He looks very sick,
Very sleep deprived.
He’s sweating like a pig on a hot summer day
I touch him, for a temperature.
His eyes spring open and jumps up!
He freaks out and gives some fake excuse
I tell him to go back to bed.
He bails
Can’t he see?
I just really care
I want to be there for him
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Sincerely, Scotch and Coke
By Krista Ledins
I gave him this very cold stare, like he’d just insulted the hell out of me, and asked him, ‘Do I look like
I’m under 21?’
‘I’m sorry, sir, but we have our-’
‘Okay, okay,’ I said. I figured the hell with it.” --J.D. Salinger
Why is he so eager to drink me?
What does he want off his mind?
He won’t speak truthfully.
He is young and out of line.
He is wasting his life and he knows it.
It’s obvious, can’t you see?
That’s why he is at this club
Trying to get a sip of me.
When sorrow overwhelms him
He doesn’t know how to act.
When people show they care for him,
He abruptly takes a step back.
He thinks he’s strong and defiant,
But he’s lost and incomplete.
His head is spinning in circles
Trying to find the missing piece.
Holden, he has problems,
More extensive than may seem.
He thinks he must rebel,
To find, in his heart some peace.
Though life for him has been rough
Now his world he wants to renew.
Bring about a brand new life
With this altered point of view
He is smart, caring, and clever.
25
He will eventually find his way.
I will then be a glass on the table
Whose contents still remain.
26
Summer Baseball, July 18, 1946
by Olivia Mann
I couldn't stand it. I know it's only his body and all that's in the cemetery, and his soul's in Heaven
and all that crap, but I couldn't stand it anyway. I just wish he wasn't there. You
didn't know him. If you'd known him, you'd know what I mean. It's not too bad when the sun's
out, but the sun only comes out when it feels like coming out.
- J.D. Salinger
With my red hair under my baseball cap,
I run to first base.
I am almost out of breath.
I feel myself becoming weak,
And things seem bleak,
But I see Holden by home base,
And I don’t feel as alone.
I am slowly getting more tired,
Trying to stagger my breath,
But we all heard the gasp when I was diagnosed.
And I’m trying to run to the next base, I really am.
My red hair falls out from under my baseball cap.
And slowly and slowly I am being tormented,
As my death would torment Holden.
I reach home base,
I am going, going and gone, just like the baseball I once hit.
27
If Paul Were Gay
By Trevor Marks
In the afternoon, he fell in with a wild San Francisco boy . . .
--Willa Cather, “Paul’s Case”
If Paul were gay, this could affect the story and give it such a different meaning.
This could be a reason for his father not being proud of him and being very ashamed of
him. His teachers wouldn’t really be happy with him being gay plus he was a bad
student. Him being gay would make him very insecure and would be a reason that he
wants to leave Pittsburgh and go to New York to follow his dreams with music. This
combination is very bad in the schools of the early 1900s. This could be why he feels so
uncomfortable in his neighborhood near traditional families. When Paul walked near a
traditional family with a baby talking to his dad he felt uncomfortable and felt out of
touch. If Paul were to be gay then he would probably feel uncomfortable near
traditional families and people in general due to his insecurity which seemed like
happened in the story. This could explain why Paul decided to jump in front of a train.
He thought that no one would accept him for being gay and that is why he succumbed to
such a tragedy of taking his own life due to his insecurities and his dreams not being
fulfilled and just overall unhappiness with everything, except when he was in New York.
.
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Jane
by Caitlin Meagher
Don’t ever tell anybody anything. If you do, you start missing everybody.
--J.D. Salinger
Holden Caulfield, I remember the name. Wow, the thought of him took me way
back. We used to be neighbors, but our parents hated each other. See my dog used to
pee on their lawn. Holden’s mom would go out of her mind saying that it turned her
grass colors. My mom would say that it looked fine, but every time they would try to
make peace it would always end in another tiff. It was a never-ending vicious cycle. But I
liked Holden. I thought he needed to sort out his issues a little better, but he was a nice
boy. I didn’t think Holden liked me very much though. I guess it’s in the past and he’s
probably moved on and all. It’s still just a little strange hearing his name, you know?
29
Holden Caulfield: Relationship 101
by Elizabeth Muratore
It has been well documented that the lives of teenagers from generation to
generation are often consumed with thoughts of dating and sex. This is no exception in
the novel The Catcher in the Rye, by J.D. Salinger, which follows the adventures of
Holden Caulfield over a few short days as he escapes his school and goes off to New
York. Holden is a typical teenage boy in many respects; he finds school to be a bore,
complains about a number of seemingly unimportant things including the “oldness” of
his teachers, and is very interested in girls. While this novel was published over 60
years ago, it is these qualities, among others, that make Holden a relatable character to
this day. His personality and storytelling reveal that he has a lot to say about the
character of other people. Teenagers today are often unsure of what they truly believe
in and spend much time thinking about all that is wrong with the world, just as Holden
does. However, the aspect of Holden’s life that is most relatable to teenagers today is his
hesitancy when it comes to girls and dating. He reveals that despite his occasionally
brash outer appearance, he is very confused on the inside about what it is that he truly
wants in a relationship, and this is a quality that is completely relevant in today’s world.
Holden spends much of the novel discussing his confusion about what is the right
course of action in a relationship. Once he is in New York, he is exposed to a dirtier side
of life, and sees couples doing things that he considers “crumby,” or naughty, such as
squirting water into each other’s mouths. He describes the supposedly “crumby” actions
that he witnesses from his hotel window, and says: “The thing is, though, I don’t like the
idea. It stinks, if you analyze it” (62). Holden feels that people in a relationship should
respect each other, and when he sees a guy squirting water all over a girl’s face, he sees
that action as disrespectful. Although Holden does admit to horsing around with girls in
the past, and continues these actions later in the novel, he believes that people in a
healthy relationship must have respect and dignity for each other. This is why he is a bit
shocked by what he sees taking place in the other hotel rooms. In addition, the fact that
in this quote, Holden says “if you analyze it” reveals that he has analyzed this issue of
respect in a relationship in great detail. Girls are clearly something that he thinks a lot
about, as do many teenage boys, and he has come to the conclusion that horsing around
with them is no way to win them over.
While Holden feels in his heart that horsing around with girls is not the right
thing to do, he does it anyway, and fully admits to this, further endearing himself to the
uncertain teenagers in today’s society. Holden is honest about his general confusion in
the world of sex, and openly states: “Sex is something I just don’t understand, I swear to
God I don’t” (63). He continually makes promises to himself that he will stop horsing
30
around with girls, but every time, he breaks these promises, and he wishes he
understood why. Holden does not know why his feelings always change so rapidly and
cannot fully justify his actions; instead, he resorts to admitting his complete uncertainty
when it comes to girls and uses this as an excuse for why he does what he does. This is
common with teenagers today, who often pull the “young and inexperienced” card when
trying to explain their thoughts and emotions to an adult. Holden feels the need to fully
convince the reader that he has no semblance of an understanding about sex, and that is
why he repeats “I swear to God I don’t” after already saying “I just don’t understand” to
further explain his views. Holden is used to arguing and having to defend himself,
truthfully or not, against people who disagree with him, and this quality displayed in his
commentary throughout the novel is one to which teenagers can honestly relate.
Occasionally, Holden gets a sudden urge to call up a girl to do something, just to
prove that he knows what to do around girls, but whenever this occurs, he eventually
talks himself out of the plans. This occurs throughout the book when he mulls over the
pros and cons of calling Jane Gallagher, and because he cannot decide what to do, he
never actually speaks to her. A similar event occurs when he decides to call Faith
Cavendish and ask her out for drinks. He only knows Faith through a mutual friend, and
in a moment of pure spontaneity, he comes up with the idea to give her a call. His
confidence is high when she answers the phone, but towards the end of the
conversation, he backs off and makes up an excuse about being busy. He describes the
abrupt end to the conversation by saying: “Boy, I really fouled that one up. I should’ve at
least made it for cocktails or something” (66). It is at this point that Holden’s true
personality has kicked in; underneath the suave outer appearance, he is very hesitant
and shy around girls he does not know very well, and this often leads him to suddenly
back out of plans or not make them at all. In effect, Holden is often his own worst
enemy, as he is the one who most frequently gets in the way of his own life. He simply
can never work up enough courage to fully follow through with his plans with girls, and
there is something in him that restricts him from doing so, that being his own
bashfulness. This characteristic is still relevant in today’s teenage population, because
teenagers often do not think things through fully before they act, or they think things
through so thoroughly that they psych themselves out of doing something that they may
have been looking forward to initially. Once they realize the potential consequences of
their actions, broken dates and broken hearts can be the result, and because Holden is
frequently guilty of both under- and over-thinking things, his actions tend to follow a
similar path.
In the situation with Faith, Holden refrains from making any plans at all, but his
time with Sunny proves that even when he does progress to actually meeting a girl, he
often halts their interactions before getting too intimate, due to his own nervousness.
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He explains this part of himself by referencing his own lack of sexual experience,
stating: “I’ve had quite a few opportunities to lose my virginity and all, but I’ve never got
around to it yet” (92). This passage reveals the root of the issue of Holden’s prolonged
virginity, and demonstrates once again that Holden is not as cool and pulled together on
the inside as he appears to be on the outside, because he never lets himself go all the
way with a girl. He says that when he is with a girl, she always tells him to stop before
anything really happens, and he feels obligated to stop in these situations, whereas most
guys would not, because he feels sorry for the girl. This shows that Holden is truly a
thoughtful and considerate person who puts other people’s feelings before his own, and
because he has never been in a situation where the girl was just as willing to have sex as
he was, he is still a virgin. Later on in the chapter, when he is with Sunny, she is ready to
have sex with him, but Holden still says no because he does not feel like he is ready for
her at that time. Instead, he makes up an excuse about a recent operation to explain to
her why he does not want to have sex. Holden is very much like a modern teenager in
this passage because teenagers tend to lie about their true feelings to others and make
up excuses to escape from uncomfortable situations. Although there are undoubtedly
some exceptions to this statement, it is a general tendency of society to lie in order to
protect ourselves, and all teenagers, including Holden, fall into that category. Even when
he is with a girl that is ready for him, Holden is still not prepared for what might
happen, and does not want to rush into something he might later regret, as he has done
in the past. This reinforces the idea that while Holden unnecessarily rushes into many
situations in life, he also backs away from an equal number of potential experiences
because of his own hesitancy.
There are many characteristics of Holden’s personality and story that are still
relevant to teenagers today, namely his uncertainty, fear of the unknown, spontaneity,
and tendency to lie. Holden is and does all of these things because he does not know any
better and is still a young person trying to find his way in the world, and teenagers
today go through many of the same things that he does. Holden is particularly relatable
in the area of dating and relationships because he is often unsure of what he really
wants, and throughout the novel, this leads him to make decisions that he later backs
out of or regrets. While Holden sometimes pretends to be smooth and experienced in
front of girls, this never works out for him in the end, and this area of his life is the one
that is most relevant in today’s society. Although many things about teenage life have
changed since The Catcher in the Rye was published, teenagers today still date and
experiment in relationships as they did during Holden’s time, and can look to his
commentary as comfort that they are not alone in navigating this tumultuous time in
their lives.
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I Am Who I Am
By Elizabeth Muratore
I realized that I might be a lonely Indian boy, but I was not alone in my loneliness. There were
millions of other Americans who had left their birthplaces in search of a dream.—Sherman Alexie
Sure, I was a sophomore in high school. I belonged to that tribe. But I also belonged to
the tribe of New Yorkers. And to the tribe of die-hard Mets fans. And to the tribe of
glasses-wearers.
And to the tribe of Beatlemaniacs.
And to the tribe of thespians.
And to the tribe of math-haters.
And to the tribe of teenage girls with braces.
And to the tribe of people who like to bake with their best friend.
And to the tribe of stubbornness.
And to the tribe of deep thinkers.
And to the tribe of older sisters.
And to the tribe of bloggers.
And to the tribe of people who love to laugh.
It was a relief.
And that’s when I knew I was genuinely happy being myself and no one else.
33
Fencing Coach
by Sam Reisman
Today was the big match in New York City. I had it all planned out, the train there, then a
celebration dinner afterwards if we won, or going to the movies and sightseeing if we lost, but
no matter what we were going to have fun. But, this kid, I think his name is Holden or
something, lost our equipment. This kid isn’t even on the team really, he’s just the manager. I
haven’t heard much about him, just that he’s getting kicked out of school, something about not
applying himself and being negative and a social critic. I don’t really care about his life or him
being kicked out of school I’m just pissed that my entire day and all my plans were ruined. The
worst part about it all, this manager kid had a smirk on his face the entire ride back, and once in
a while he would laugh when he saw how angry the entire team was.
34
Something to Root For
By Crystal Ren
There were times I didn’t even think you were human, but let me tell you this. You
were...the most human being that I’ve ever known... --BBC Sherlock
Sherlock Holmes is a household name now, if it wasn't before, due to the recent
resurgence (if indeed interpretations of Sherlock Holmes ever really slowed) of various
types of media portraying this timeless detective. The interesting thing is that he isn't a
well adjusted, social individual. Rather, he is the quintessential outsider. His superior
intellect, extraordinary observational skills, and asocial tendencies, causes a rift
between him and the rest of the world, with the exception of a few people. However,
something about the emotionally crippled, nonconforming genius just draws the viewer
in. He says to John Watson, “Dear God. What is it like in your funny little brains? It must
be so boring,” when Sherlock figures out something John has not. His mental capacity
draws a harsh line between him and other people. This along with the other factors that
make Sherlock exceptional at his job, make him an outcast: his emotional detachment,
his brilliance, and his need of mental stimulation. At one point, he says without sarcasm,
“We've got a serial killer on our hands. Love those, there's always something to look
forward to.” He needs the mental exercise to stave off the monotony of daily life. This
very effectively sets him apart from others. This also demonstrates Sherlock's
ambivalent, and even gleeful attitude toward what normal people would consider
horrifying events. Throughout the series he never loses his unique personality, the
social deviations, or that indifferent attitude towards whom he deems below his notice
(still the majority of humankind), but he does evolve as a character. He begins to
develop emotions and become more human. It is this that ultimately draws us. We want
to see him change. Perhaps we are continuously fascinated by such a character because
he gives us something to root for. There is something about this outcast that attracts our
attention, whether it is his journey from an isolated machine to a man, or his outsider
status in itself, Sherlock Holmes has managed to capture us since the start, and he has
yet to let us go.
35
An Abundance of Fear
by Crystal Ren
He realized well enough that he had always been tormented by fear, a sort of
apprehensive dread...--Willa Cather
Fear can be considered man’s greatest motive. It drives good actions, bad actions,
small actions, and great actions. It keeps people from taking potentially fatal risks and it
leads people to do things that may be extremely risky. Its many causes are innumerable
and its effects are just as numerous. The short story, “Paul’s Case” by Willa Cather
centers on a boy driven to many desperate acts due to fear. Paul, the main character,
certainly had a case, and it was one of intense fear. He was afraid of quite a few things,
but the foremost terror for him was living a boring, tedious life.
Paul is a boy who loves sensory stimuli. He particularly enjoys watching plays
and listening to the orchestra. However, his natural circumstances do not allow him to
pursue his own version of happiness as fully as he would like. Instead, he lives on
Cordelia Street, “where all the houses were exactly alike, and where business men of
moderate means begot and reared large families of children…all of whom were as
exactly alike as their homes, and of a piece with the monotony of which they lived”
(202). Here he is surrounded by the mundane. He feels an intense disgust and dislike for
these people and consequently a deep fear of becoming like them. Cather writes, “He
approached it [his house] tonight with a nerveless sense of defeat, the hopeless feeling
of sinking back forever into ugliness and commonness that he had always had when he
came home” (202). He cannot stand the “ugliness” of his daily life. His great fear is that
he would become one of these common people and that he would be stuck in this mire
of “monotony of which they lived”.
Paul commits many acts out of his fear of becoming like the people on Cordelia
Street. When his father cuts him off from his most major venue of sensory stimulus, he
feels that he can no longer stand it. He decides that leaving Cordelia Street is the best
course of action. This weighty decision was caused by fear. Cather writes, “He realized
well enough that he had always been tormented by fear, a sort of apprehensive
dread…Until now, he could not remember a time when he had not been dreading
something” (209). Paul’s constant state of fear and his inability to continue his jaunts to
the concert hall form a volatile mix and cause him to take a very risky path. He steals
money from his father and runs away to New York. Here he realizes that he is finally
free from this pressing anxiety of living out his life in an unchanging gray stretch. He
finally feels comfortable. Cather writes, “Paul wondered that there were honest men in
the world at all. This was what all the world was fighting for, he reflected; this was what
36
all the struggle was about” (210). In this comfort that only wealth can bring, Paul is
surrounded by all the sensory delights he can imagine. He is surprised that most people
don’t take the route he takes, the shortcut, by which he jumped straight to luxury. Paul
feels no sense of sorrow for leaving his father, or for stealing his money. His great fear
has finally been assuaged and all is right in the world.
Although Paul has finally found the place he can feel at home in, all good things
must end. He soon gets a paper chronicling his theft. This piece of news also acts as a
warning; his father is coming to New York to take him back. When Paul discovers this,
the world crashes down about his head. To Paul, going back to Cordelia Street and back
to the ennui was “worse than jail, even.” After such a feast for the senses, Paul sees the
returning to Cordelia Street as a death sentence. Cather writes, “He had the old feeling
that the orchestra had suddenly stopped, the sinking sensation that the play was over”
(212). This fear of living his life in commonness and boredom springs back up with a
vengeance. This fear makes him feel that he can no longer go on. The narrator says, “He
rose and moved about with a painful effort, succumbing now and again to attacks of
nausea. It was the old depression exaggerated; all the world had become Cordelia
Street” (213). He makes one more drastic choice to soothe this fear. He decides to
commit suicide. Even as he is following through with this decision, and flying through
the air in front of a train, regret bubbles up within him. Cather writes, “As he fell, the
folly of his haste occurred to him with merciless clearness, the vastness of what he had
left undone” (214). For the few precious seconds before he died, he was free of his fear
and realized that this hasty panic driven action was not the best choice. The grip of
panic and terror took hold of him, when he found out about returning to Cordelia Street,
and didn’t let go throughout his decision making process. When he finally shook free, in
the few seconds he flew through the air, it was already too late.
The entire story arc of “Paul’s Case” explores the causes and effects of Paul’s fear.
It can be considered a story exploring the nature of fear and what it eventually drives a
boy to do. Fear is indeed a most powerful motivator, forcing Paul to run away, and in the
end, to even kill himself. Paul’s “Case” can be thought of as a case of fear; the intense
anxiety of living an ordinary, lackluster life.
37
Mr. Antolini
by Caitlyn Salstein
I have a feeling that you're riding for some kind of a terrible, terrible fall. But I don't
honestly know what kind....—J.D. Salinger
Oh Holden, what is wrong?
Was it that I lectured you? You know everything I said was true.
You really do need to apply yourself in your studies.
But you seemed upset and you started to fret about your feelings towards me.
As soon as you woke you bolted out the door, you made leaving my house like some
kind of chore.
How did this go so wrong?
I think at times you are quite strange, why did you act so deranged?
What led you to assume? I was just checking up on you.
Your thoughts so tainted by your fear, but soon it became clear
You misunderstood my action; it was not for my satisfaction
I thought you would come back but you never returned.
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Tribes
by Caitlyn Salstein
Thank you, Sherman Alexie
…Sure, I was a reserved person. I belonged to that tribe. But I also belonged to the tribe
of Jewish culture. And to the tribe of cheerleaders. And of the tribe of gymnasts.
And to the tribe of lazy people.
And to the tribe of people with OCD habits.
And to the tribe of people who say “I’m not wasting my money on that”.
And to the tribe of teens with bad genetics.
And to the tribe of people who turn temporarily deaf while they’re in “the zone”.
And to the tribe of creators.
And to the tribe of makeup lovers.
And to the tribe of people who over obsess with determination.
And to the tribe of people who are anemic.
And to the tribe of brace faces.
It was a moment of peace.
And that’s when I knew I could bring out the best in myself
without being shy.
39
The Graffiti
By Charlie Scharf
But while I was sitting down, I saw something that drove me crazy. Somebody'd written
"Fuck you" on the wall. It drove me damn near crazy. I thought how Phoebe and all the
other little kids would see it… and how they'd all think about it and maybe even worry
about it for a couple of days. I kept wanting to kill whoever'd written it.
-- J.D. Salinger
Curses on the wall
Haunting this world’s young
Poisoning their brains.
Curses on the wall
Some people hate me
Some just don’t care
Some don’t know what I mean
Most don’t understand me.
Curses on the wall
Not by choice
To serve unwillingly
I didn’t want this.
Curses on the wall
Molded by fiends
Some think I’m artistic
Some think I’m just ugly.
Curses on the wall
I’m just paint
I didn’t pick my fate
Please don’t hate me.
Curses on the wall.
40
My Tribes
by Sarah Sigman
It was a huge realization. And that’s when I knew I was going to be okay.
--Sherman Alexie
I’m a girl, like many
Who love collared shirts.
Girls who have a very favorite pair of shoes
Still perfect after four years.
Girls with hilarious fathers.
Girls with older brothers.
Girls with loud mouths
And lucky socks.
Girls who wear their grandmother’s jewelry
Each and everyday.
Girls who have lived in the same house since they were born
With the same best friend
Ever since first grade.
Girls with incredible watch tan lines
Now a distant reminder of a summer spent on open waters.
But, unlike others
I’m a Sigman.
41
Holden Caulfield is “The Catcher in the Rye”
By Jacob Silverman
Port Washington resident, Steve Maraboli, author of Life, the Truth, and Being
Free says, “You were put on this earth to achieve your greatest self, to live out your
purpose, and to do it fearlessly.” J.D. Salinger’s, The Catcher in the Rye, is the story of
Holden Caulfield, a 16-year-old boy and his adventures after he leaves his school,
Pencey Prep, and travels around New York City. Some critics propose the theory that
The Catcher in the Rye is a quest narrative. Holden knows that his purpose in life is to be
“The Catcher in the Rye,” a person who stands in a field of rye and catches kids before
they fall off a cliff, a metaphor for protecting children’s innocence. Holden knows from
the start that his purpose is to protect children’s innocence. His quest is to go out and
achieve this goal, even though it is unreachable. Holden’s quest is his attempt to
become, “The Catcher in the Rye,” and protect children’s innocence.
In the beginning of the novel, Holden is kicked out of Pencey Prep, for failing
various classes. Holden’s journey begins when he decides to leave Pencey after a fight
with his roommate, Stradlater, after he figures out that he went on a date with one of
Holden’s childhood friends, Jane. Holden believes that Stradlater took advantage of Jane
during a conversation between the two after Stradlater and Jane’s date.
What’d you do? I said. Give her the time in Ed Banky’s goddam car? My voice was
shaking something awful… This next part I don’t remember so hot. All I know is I
got up from the bed, like I was going down to the can or something, and then I
tried to sock him, with all my might, right smack in the toothbrush, so it would
split his goddam throat open.
Holden used to be good friends with Jane, whom Holden used to be good friends with.
The two used to play golf and checkers together. Holden sees her as good and innocent
because she was part of his childhood; Holden has many fond memories of his
experiences with Jane. Throughout the novel, Holden recollects about his experiences
with Jane.
I know old Jane like a book – I still couldn’t get her off my brain. I knew her like a
book. I really did. I mean, besides checkers, she was quite fond of all athletic
sports, and after I got to know her, the whole summer long we played tennis
together almost every morning and golf almost every afternoon. I really got to
know her quite intimately. I don’t mean it was anything physical or anything – it
wasn’t – but we saw each other all the time.
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Holden and Jane’s relationship was never sexual. Holden believes that if Stradlater had
sex with Jane, she has lost her innocence and exposed to the real, cruel world. Holden
does not know that his purpose is to protect others, but events like these help him see
this along the way.
Holden does not want to grow up and join the adult world, and become part of a
very cruel, evil, and phony existence. Holden wants the same thing for others; he does
not want kids to have to learn that the world can be brutal and wicked. Holden wants to
preserve innocence by preventing change from occurring. Holden is very fond of the
glass cases at the museum because they never change, symbolizing the change that
occurs that makes children lose their innocence.
Certain things they should stay the way they are. You ought to be able to stick
them in one of those big glass cases and just leave them alone. I know that’s
impossible, but it’s too bad anyway.
During Holden’s two days in New York City, the reader learns that Holden is not
trying to prevent his parents from figuring out he flunked out of school. He is trying to
find a purpose. Holden’s purpose is to be a guardian angel, a protector of the innocent.
During various moments in the novel, the reader learns about Holden’s appreciation
and sympathy for children. Holden feels sorry for the young boy that has to use the
bathroom during the movie but his mother tells him to stay. Holden does not want to do
more than chat with Sunny because he sees that she is young.
I took her dress over to the closet and hung it up for her. It was funny. It made
me feel sort of sad when I hung it up. I thought of her going in a store and buying
it, and nobody knowing she was a prostitute and all. The salesman probably just
thought that she was a regular girl when she bought it. It made me feel sad as
hell – I don’t know why exactly.
Holden is trying to protect Sunny’s innocence because he sees that she is young
and he feels bad for her. He images her going into a store to buy the dress and having
the sales person think that she is a regular girl not a prostitute. By not having sex with
Sunny, Holding is protecting her innocence.
When Holden goes to drop off a letter at his old school, he notices vulgar words
written on the walls.
Somebody’d written, “F**k you” on the wall. It drove me damn near crazy. I
thought how Phoebe and all the other little kids would see it, and how they’d
43
wonder what the hell it meant, and then finally some dirty kid would tell them –
all cockeyed, naturally – what it meant, and how they’d all think about it and
maybe even worry about it for a couple of days.
This is another example where the reader sees Holden as “the Catcher in the
Rye.” Holden, by scratching off the vulgarities, is protecting the children. They will lack
the understanding of the word and therefore, will not use it.
Even though his goal of protecting his own innocence and that of all children is
not realistic, Holden still tries to achieve this goal through his quest. Holden is angered
with Stradlater because he has felt that he took advantage of Jane. Holden sees that
Sunny is young and does nothing but chatting with her. Holden scratches off the graffiti
on the wall in an effort to prevent the children from learning curse words, so they will
not use them. Holden’s journey is a medium through which Holden tries to achieve his
goal of preventing children from losing their innocence. Through these events, Holden
learns of his purpose: to be “The Catcher in the Rye,” and to fulfill his life purpose by
protecting children’s innocence.
44
The Mitt
by Sarah Silverstein
My brother Allie had this left-handed fielder’s mitt. He was left-handed. The thing that was descriptive about
it, though, was that he had poems written all over the fingers and the pocket and everywhere. In green ink. He
wrote them on it so that he’d have something to read when he was in the field and nobody was up at bat. He’s
dead now.—J.D. Salinger
Locked in the dark, empty room
Collecting dust
As the words in green,
That once danced on my skin,
Are smudged away
Never taken out again to play
It is always night
There is no day
Has the sun gone away?
Is that why the children are never heard
Laughing with gay
I listen to the footsteps
I see the shadows
They stop outside the door,
They touch the knob,
But they hurry away once more
Was I forgotten?
Was I outgrown?
Where have they gone?
Why am I alone?
I can hardly remember
The warm hand that reached inside me
45
The slam of the ball as it hit me
The gentle tickle as the pen etched the words in me
Sometimes I can hear
The distant traces of laughter
Of smiles
Of joy
What happened here?
Why was I shunned?
Was it something I did?
Was there something better?
Oh, how I wish to
Feel the earth moving beneath me as they run
Feel the cool perspiration in my leather
Oh, to be loved again
I was forgotten
I was outgrown
I was left in the gloom
To be all alone
Will someone speak?
Will someone explain?
Will someone let me escape from the night?
And will someone
Please,
Turn on the light!
46
Troublemaker
by Sarah Silverstein
Disorder and impertinence were among the offences named, yet each of his
instructors felt that it was scarcely possible to put into words the real cause of the
trouble—Willa Cather
Like any other typical day, I woke up, complained about having to go to school,
hopped on the bus, and walked straight into Mrs. Grennan’s third grade classroom. The
sun was shining, the birds were chirping, and I was definitely not expecting anything
out of the ordinary to happen. The day progressed like any other and I put on my
favorite jean jacket because the winter chill had just begun to disappear, and skipped
outside to play with my friends. After an hour of fun-filled recess and yummy lunches
our rowdy class reentered the classroom bouncing off the walls and full of the energy all
eight year olds have. Mrs. Grennan motioned us over to join her on the carpet, and it
seemed as if it took forever for her to quiet us down, but then again forever in an eight
year olds mind is three minutes. Sitting beside her was a tank with green clay balls in
water, one ball was floating and one ball was at the bottom of the tank, we were all very
confused. Then she began to explain buoyancy and told us that we needed to discover
the mystery of why one ball was resting on top of the water and why the other was
directly underneath it on the floor. Now, we were all fascinated and listening intently,
because the most interesting thing there was for a third grader was a mystery. Right as
we leaned in to learn the mystery, she put the tank aside and told us to go back to our
desks. Disappointed, the twenty-two other students and I trudged back to our desks.
The rest of the day was boring compared to that excitement. Math, PEP, and
independent reading occupied us for the rest of the day, however, all of our minds
drifted back to the mysterious balls of clay. When bus dismissal finally rolled around
and all the students had left, Kate, Roger, John, and I were left staring at the balls
waiting for our bus to be called, it was always the last bus to arrive. Mrs. Grennan was
standing in the hallway talking to another teacher with her back turned to us. Roger
and John’s fascination got the best of them and they took one step too close and the tank
suddenly tipped over, spilling the water and splitting the two balls in half. Mrs. Grennan
whirled around with an apparent anger shown on her face. None of us had ever seen her
that mad, and we were terrified. She turned her attention from the broken balls on the
floor to us, and said in almost a yell, “Well, you wanted to know what was in the balls,
now you do! One was hollow; the other had a ball in it! You were all going to find out
tomorrow! That was very immature of you and you will all have to write me an apology
letter before you get on the bus,” but before she turned away she added, “and do not
think about ruining this for the others!” With that she turned to her desk and watched
47
us all cautiously take out a piece of paper and a pencil. She glared at us until bus thirtyfive B was announced over the loudspeaker and we quickly scurried out of the
classroom.
Mrs. Grennan was my favorite teacher. She was kind, funny, and never yelled!
After that incident I knew there was no way I was still one of her favorite students. The
next day came and we all learned the mystery, and no one but the four of us, and our
teacher of course, knew our secret, that we had known the surprise all along. The rest
of the school year passed and that event was put behind all of us. But to this day, I still
remember that out of the ordinary third grade day.
48
Dreams
by Sarah Silverstein
Langston Hughes’ poem, “Dreams,” is a metaphor; it is an unlikely comparison of
words, places, and items that one would never otherwise imagine being placed together.
However, how unrealistic are the comparisons he makes? If you think about it, the
metaphors make perfect sense because they portray dreams in a way that make you
want to take yours and lock them in a bullet-proof box so they can never escape. The
metaphors he uses allow the readers to grasp the idea of how easily our dreams can
fade away, even when just one little discouraging thought or idea arises it can make you
question everything you once hoped for. Hughes remarks, “Hold fast to dreams/ For
when dreams go,” (Hughes, lines 5-6). By using the word, “when,” he is showing how
dreams, unfortunately, do not last forever if no action is taken towards reaching them.
The longer a person waits and lets their dreams just sit in their thoughts, the more
unrealistic they become, and the faster they disappear. “Hold fast to dreams” is a
metaphor because we are incapable of physically holding our hopes and goals in our
own hands. However, we slowly begin to understand the severity of what he is trying to
say, and it instills a bit of panic in us. To further his point, another metaphor is used,
“Life is a barren field/ Frozen with snow,” (Hughes, lines 7-8). This symbolizes the
feelings of coldness, chills, and a shock to the system- a life that is unfulfilling and
unsatisfying. The idea that without dreams, there is emptiness, depression, and nothing
to live for is a frightening thought. The metaphor sounds similar to death, almost as if
each person is a corpse moving around without emotions, feelings, and insights.
Dreams are confusing, they are intangible and people cannot see, touch, or smell them.
However, everyone feels them. They feel the pain and ache in every bone in their body
when the dream is lost in the blink of an eye, and they feel the joy and the smile
becomes present on their face when they finally reach the destination point. How do
you explain these overpowering emotions? It is nearly impossible, however, Langston
Hughes provides relatable and understandable ideas in his beautiful poem, “Dreams,”
by using metaphors to have each reader fully comprehend his point, even if it is in a
brutally honest manner.
49
O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree
by Taylor Silvester
Hold the sonuvabitch up! Hold it up, for Chrissake!—J.D. Salinger
Mr. Julgran and Gregory Julgran
That boy will never learn,
The truck rides are always long
He never listens.
Have you ever sat in a truck, and have to listen to a man talk about Christmas
trees for hours?
Always staring off into space.
A very boring topic.
Thinking of something else, somewhere else.
But I need him here.
I cannot stand it here, in this slow life.
Oh, how he wouldn’t understand.
I want to live a different life, but my dreams are
Forgotten between the sales of Christmas trees, or the annual spending around
the holidays.
"You need a good future!" I tell him, but he never listens.
I hear him but I pretend not to.
Might I be able to go one day without reminding him what to do?
Could I go through one day without being told what to do?
“‘Ever try to focus son? You need to know things like this, so you can have a good future."
My future? A future that is unclear for me.
You would think a
Boy his age would know
Of how this world works.
You would think,
Life could be what someone makes of it.
Instead of someone telling you what to make of it.
but he is always
Yearning for more,
Forget sales and stocks,
Even the trees, because I want something more.
More, which I cannot give him.
50
Hopes and Dreams
by Kat Spradling
Dreams and hopes are an essential part of life for anyone, especially children in
this world. Hearing from the beginning of our lives that we can do anything, be
anything, and go anywhere that we want to do is what makes it possible for us to
actually do those things. If from the beginning we had to realize with brutal intensity
that because of something that holds us back, we would never be able to accomplish our
dreams, that’s what we start to believe and therefore that’s what happens. Environment
and positive reinforcement from the people around us has a huge impact on whether or
not we can achieve our dreams. If everyone around us has given up their dreams and
lost hope, that’s usually what will happen to us as well. In the poem Dreams by Langston
Hughes, he states, “For if dreams die, life is a broken-winged bird that cannot fly”. The
ability for us to “fly” and achieve our highest potential and our dreams, it is essential to
keep dreams alive. If they are crushed in childhood and the adolescent years, it’s almost
definite that in the child’s adult life they will not have accomplished what they wanted
to because once it’s instilled in your head that you’re not good enough or not able to
achieve anything you want to, it’s permanently etched in your brain and it’s extremely
hard to change that line of thinking once it’s established. That kind of discouragement
and negative thinking early in one’s life metaphorically breaks the wings of one’s
dreams, making it nearly impossible to fly.
Arnold Spirit or Junior as he likes to be called from the novel The Absolutely
True Diary of a Part-Time Indian” is in a situation where his dreams aren’t recognized
and he hears and sees from all around him that he will never be able to be anything
other than a poverty-stricken Indian living on the reservation. But one conversation
with one of his teachers makes him realize that hope and dreams are extremely
important to never give up. The reason that everyone on his reservation has ended up
the way they did is because they never even tried, they lost hope and gave up their
dreams and settled into the life that they thought was their destiny. Arnold eventually
realizes that staying on the reservation and becoming like everyone else there doesn’t
have to be his destiny, he can change it. But it takes him a lot of time and effort, with
positive reinforcement from people close to him to be able to do so. But, because his line
of thinking has been so distorted and he has been discouraged from pursuing his
dreams all his life, throughout the book when he’s thinking to himself or having
conversations with other people discussing dreams and hope we can see his distorted
line of thinking regarding the matters. Such as in the beginning of the novel, he refers to
the reservation and all the people on it by saying, “We don’t get those chances, or
choices.” When he first starts talking about dreams here, he starts off with this line, and
by saying so concretely that the Indians on the reservation don’t get chances or choices
to change the way that they live, shows us that Arnold thinks that it’s the same way
from him. No chance, no choice to change the path of his life. He also later refers to the
cyclical nature regarding the same matters, going from generation to generation when
he says, “It’s an ugly circle and there’s nothing you can do about it.” He seems completely
set in this frame of mind that it isn’t possible for him or anyone else on the reservation
51
to achieve anything they want to do, they are destined to stay on the reservation and be
poor like everyone before them. Arnold is the perfect example of the line of thinking
that is developed when your dreams are discouraged, and even though he begins on a
path to make the necessary changes for him to achieve his dreams and goals, his line of
thinking will never completely change. He will always have a little voice in his brain that
tells him he can’t do it, or that he’s not good enough, resulting from his situation and
lack of encouragement to strive for his dreams early on in his life.
52
I’m Catcher in the Rye! Who are you?
by Yuichiro Uzu
I keep picturing all these little kids playing some game in this big field of rye and all.
Thousands of little kids, and nobody's around - nobody big, I mean - except me. And I'm
standing on the edge of some crazy cliff. What I have to do, I have to catch everybody if
they start to go over the cliff - I mean if they're running and they don't look where they're
going I have to come out from somewhere and catch them. That's all I do all day. I'd just be
the catcher in the rye and all. I know it's crazy, but that's the only thing I'd really like to
be.--J.D. Salinger
Have you ever thought the way the outsiders think? You wouldn't be able to find
the answer because you are not the people who are the outsiders. One of the novels, The
Catcher in the Rye, by J.D. Salinger expressed the digressions from the viewpoint of the
outsiders. Throughout the novel, the author has impacted worldwide people and
became one of the most popular novels in the world in the 20th century. Not only the
novel impacted the world, but the poem, “I’m Nobody! Who are you?” had expressed the
idea of being outsiders as well. Both of them showed the isolation and the connection
with others by using viewpoint from the outsiders throughout the novel and the poem.
Catcher in the Rye and “I’m Nobody ! Who are you?” are similar in various ways.
One of the strongest similarities is isolation. Both Holden, the main character of the
novel, and the narrator of the poem, are the outsiders stood by and watched the world
objectively. In addition, they refused to take part in public because they knew that
“People never notice anything” (P.9). In the novel, Holden represent himself as a man
who is “standing on the edge of some crazy cliff.” His only job was to “catch everybody if
they start to go over the cliff, if they're running and they don't look where they're going”
(P. 173). “The edge of some crazy cliff” represents the sense of distance between Holden
and others as an outsider and an onlooker. Without having others, he’d not hear
anyone’s stories. Therefore, he stood by and watched them to keep their safety in order
to hear their stories. The narrator of the poem questions us, “I’m Nobody! Who are you?
–Are you - Nobody – too?” This quote questions others as well as we should appear to
them. Moreover, isolation disconnected everyone since people misunderstand from
their own perspectives. The narrator outraged to be “Somebody” because being
“somebody” was dejected and took part in “public” was un tolerable “like a Frog.”(5
line).
In “Catcher in the Rye” and “ I’m Nobody! Who are you?” the authors expressed
the hardships to be outsiders throughout the novel and the poem. Both of Holden and
the narrator were the outsiders and onlookers who wondered in loneliness. Their
original viewpoints deepened the understanding of the loneliness. Our society uses the
53
social net workings, causing people to lose themselves contemporary by
misunderstanding communication. The social networks are a drug. The addiction of this
“drug” pushed people to become the outsiders. Both the novel and the poem related to
our society by representing how the isolations and being outsiders influenced people. If
everyone starts feeling dreary to be in the public as Holden and the narrator felt, it’s the
end of the world. Therefore, we, the human beings, should reconsider our ways of
communication in order to construct the world.
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Allie Caulfield
by Roberto Vides
When the weather’s nice, my parents my parents go out quite frequently and stick
a bunch of flowers on old Allie’s grave... It wasn’t too bad when the sun was out,
but twice we were there when it started to rain.—J.D. Salinger
My scarlet hair slowly withering away
As years stuck in the dirt would do to anybody
Disease was my actual cause of death but I don’t wish to be specific
And the rain seeping into my coffin kills me even further
How I wish to play ball with my brother once more
So I can read the poems on my glove like I used to
It’s a sad story to hear of a boy that dies at such a young age
But more sad are the fools putting flowers over my grave as if it would help,
Or at least, that’s what my brother would tell me
“What an intelligent boy!” is what my family would say
I hope to return to them. Maybe some day
Hunting Hat
Woe to the unwary person that comes across this boy
Phony! Phony! Phony! - is all I ever hear
Ugh! What a hypocritical moron he is
And why is he embarrassed to wear me in public?
Does he wish to hide his personality so it won’t be judged?
Perhaps the phonies will get him and save me from this curse
One dollar! What a slap in the face that was to me
I hope that crumby prostitute comes back and steals me, too
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Dear Holden
by Arielle Waller
I was only thirteen, and they were going to have me psychoanalyzed and all, because I
broke all the windows in the garage. I don’t blame them. I really don’t. I slept in the garage
that night he died, and broke all the goddam windows with my fist, just for the hell of it. I
even tried to break all the windows on the station wagon we had that summer, but my
hand was broken and everything by that time, and so I couldn’t do it. It was a very stupid
thing to do, I’ll admit, but I hardly even knew I was doing it, and you didn’t know Allie.--J.D.
Salinger
You, with the mousy brown hair
and the gray streaks,
they glisten.
You, with the brown eyes,
they sparkle.
You, the tall and lanky one,
with your fiery red hat,
easy to find in the midst of the world.
You, whom I love dearly,
for always being by my side,
and never treating me any differently
after the monster enveloped my body,
and slowly weakened it,
until it simply couldn’t fight any longer.
Early, my spirit has departed,
but our souls shall never separate.
I don’t want you ever to feel alone, big brother.
My soul is with you every step of the way.
Holden, I promise, I'm there,
and I listen.
Oh, big brother, how i miss being face-to-face with you.
When you talk to me,
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it’s so frustrating.
I can see you,
yet you can’t see me.
My Catcher in the Rye,
who is dearest to my heart,
I want to thank you.
For keeping my mitt and all.
You know, it’s pretty nice up here,
I get to play ball and stuff.
Tell Phoebe “Hello” for me, will you?
And give a hug to mom and dad while you’re at it.
Oh, and Holden?
Never hesitate to follow your dreams.
Live every day to the fullest,
because you never know when it’s going to be your last.
Well, until we meet again, big brother,
in the world up above.
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The Museum Exhibits
by David Wolmark
The best thing, though, in that museum was that everything always stayed right where it
was. Nobody’d move. . . . Nobody’d be different. The only thing that would be different
would be you.--J.D. Salinger
In this darkened silent room,
I stand, holding my pose.
Looking out into the crowd,
Who have come to see me and my friends!
My friends and I, on an interminable fishing trip,
on solid, sculpted water
Gathering food for our village,
from plants of plastic
neither living nor moving
have made us a world spectacle,
People journey to see us.
Sometimes we see the same face gaze upon us
More than once,
each time changing, growing, aging.
For I am made of wax and they are made of flesh,
and I will never know what age and change brings.
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