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Italians and southern people in particular are usually very
friendly and outgoing.
The Italian way of communicating is very direct, open and
demonstrative. They often emphasize everything with hand
gestures.
They are not afraid to call a spade, a spade.
They look at you straight in the eye and challenge you up
front and sometimes they ask you questions that probably
others would never dare to ask.
If you see two Italians shouting at each other in the streets, this
does not necessarily mean that they are angry, it means that they
are having an animated discussion!
Greeting Italians
The use of Tu/Lei and Introductions
Notwithstanding what said above, when one is first introduced to a person, one always uses
the formal Lei, until the Italian says to you diamoci del tu ( you can address me by using
“tu”/you), which means, that you are now on informal terms but the standard code is to wait
until they say it, unless you really know the social codes of Italy.
The degree of intimacy also determines the form of greeting one uses on greeting.
On introduction, in formal and informal situations one says Piacere, pleased to meet you, and
in only strictly informal situations, with young people, for example, one would use ciao.
On subsequent meetings, you use <buon giorno>, good morning/good afternoon/evening to say
hello and arriverderci/arriverderla ( the latter is more polite) to say goodbye.
Only if you are on informal terms you say ciao which means salve this is a more formal
version.
If you are under 40 years of age (and, thus, still a ragazzo, a boy) you must use the Lei form
with
older
people
even
though
they
use
the
tu
form
with
you.
Italians tend to greet strangers far more than Anglo-Saxons do, e.g. people passing in the
palazzo/apartment building or lifts etc.
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Physical Greetings
For social occasions, it is normal to shake hands with people whom you do not know well,
particularly for men and mixed couples.
Women usually kiss on the cheeks, as from the farewell of their first meeting.
On subsequent meetings, if they are more than acquaintances by now, they will usually kiss
you hello and goodbye. In central and Southern Italy, it is normal for men to kiss each other
cheek to cheek as much as women do. This is often more a ritual than a display of genuine
affection.
However, the degree of warmth of greeting is also subject to the occasion especially if you
have not seen them for a long time.
For business appointments please keep your kisses to yourself!!! Or maybe you could try
kissing the ring of your prospective client!! No I am just joking!!!
Social Appointments
The Italian expression ci vediamo/ci sentiamo, “see you soon”, really means a casual “see you
around” so do not take it literally even if they say stasera, domani/ this evening, tomorrow,
for the Italians it could mean in a couple of days. If you wish to make sure it is going to
happen, you need to confirm it by a telephone call and even then do not get outraged if they
stand you up or are a bit late as in Italy this is not a reason to get annoyed. They please
themselves and as they say When in Rome....
Italian Customs
Italian customs and way of life differ from the
other Western Cultures in many ways.
Work Hours
Their hours of business for shops are usually from
9.30 - 13.30, after which most shops shut for siesta
time; then reopen from 16.30- 19.30.
However, many large companies have their set work
hours 8.30 - 16.30 with lunch provided for the
workers from 13.00 -14.00.
Most commercial offices and services also close for
the siesta e.g. banks, post offices , museums and
churches.
So when travelling, make allowances for the fact
that if you arrive at a town at lunch time, 13.30, the
only things that will be open will be the restaurants!
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The word siesta doesn’t mean they all go to sleep for an hour or more, but it’s only a sort of
break or rest from work usually taken to have lunch at home.
La Passeggiata.
La Passeggiata (the stroll) normally starts at about 18.00 for those who do not work shop
hours and its aim is to see and meet people, especially before having lunch or dinner. This is
most popular on a Sunday morning or afternoon.
This is the time for socializing and catching up with your friends and all the young ones
(giovani) are cruising on their bikes, stopping at bars for a “caffè” ( a cup of coffee) or
generally slouching on their parked bikes or “poised like young models” against walls on the
footpath.
Especially in the past and in small towns the aim was to check out the passers- by and to eye
off and eyeball the opposite sex!! Nowadays it is only a stereotype; anyway make sure you
take off your sunglasses so this is possible!!!
Eating and Drinking
Italians are not big breakfast eaters. They usually have a
cappuccino and a croissant or bun for breakfast and they
have this at home, but they also like standing up at the bar
counter. It is usually the tourists who are seated paying
double price for the coffee.
as the Napolitan “coffee”.
Cappuccino is a breakfast drink only as Italians usually have
the short espresso through the day. Coffee making is an art
in Italy, especially in the south. Napoli could be said to be the
home of the greatest “caffè”, where everyone has their
favourite bar and the barista makes it with his own particular
flair and if you return often, he will remember how many
spoons of sugar you take and maybe even after a year if he
particularly warms to you. Anyway Sicilian “coffee” is as good
The large meal of the day is saved for lunch because it’s a family
custom to sit all together around the table. Lunch is often
followed by a “siesta”,
especially in summer, and then
afterwards, walk off your meal with a passeggiata!!
Italians do not eat lunch before 13.30 so if you arrive at a restaurant before this, the
waiters might not be ready, the same at night, Italians usually eat at 21.00 in the evening so
if you are hungry at 6.00 p:m, you might like to have a quick snack otherwise you will only be
accompanied by other tourists in the restaurants.
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After Dinner (Dopo Cena)
Italians do not sit around at restaurants and drink the rest of the bottle like other cultures.
They also usually have their children with them as babysitting is also not in their culture.
Everything is a family affair.
Drinking without eating is frowned upon and seen as senseless to the Italians. Wine is to
accompany food not to make one drunk, and maybe a small digestivo is taken after a meal.
If the restaurant puts a bottle of Lemoncello (lemon liqueur) or Amaro (red almond liqueur)
on your table, one is meant to only have a thimbleful, not the whole bottle.
If you do attempt to drink the whole bottle, you will be very sick as it is pure alcohol.!!! Sicily
and the Amalfi coast are famous for their Lemoncello.
In the north of Italy like Turin, Venice, Milano, there are many different types of grappa on
offer, particularly in winter, these can also be put in your coffee to warm the cockles of your
soul when there is snow outside.!!
Once the meal is over, in summer, it is time to do another passeggiata perhaps to find a “buon
gelato” (good icecream) or to go to the “piazza” (square) to meet friends.
Recommendations for tourists, not for the Comenius students!
In all the large cities, the streets are still pulsating at midnight. The summer is too exciting
and hot to be wasted on sleep, so do not try to go to bed early as the beeping and the
shouting below your windows, will only wake you up!!
There is nothing worse than trying to sleep on a hot humid night when everyone else is
outside having fun.
Especially do not try to sleep in Southern cities on New Year’s Eve: the firecrackers, the
rockets and the car beeping go all night!!
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