Good for you, Lana Del Rey
Introducing Tamar McCollom, one of Mirador’s new monthly
columnists! Her articles are posted on the first Tuesday of
every month.
Rarely does an artist with only one album to her name already
have such a long and storied history. Lana Del Rey came on the
scene as a self-produced internet star from humble trailer
park beginnings. Blogs rejoiced in her vintage-inspired
aesthetic and her legitimately excellent breakout track “Video
Games.”
But alas, the only thing that blogs love more than creating a
star is eating their own, and it was discovered that dear
little Lana was signed to the major label, Interscope, and
that she was not actually Lana Del Rey, but Lizzy Grant, the
wealthy daughter of a real-estate investor. Backlash to Lana
ensued, which was quickly followed by backlash to the backlash
(Think: “Leave Britney Alone!”). And somewhere in there, an
ongoing debate over whether her lips were real took over the
internet.
All of that was supposed to change when Lana took the stage on
Saturday Night Live. However, the big night came, and there
she was, warbling away completely off-key and swaying
awkwardly as if she were the semi-incapacitated sister in
Sixteen Candles.
Oh, it was cringe-worthy indeed—perhaps only slightly below
Ashlee Simpson’s infamous lip-synching debacle on the same
show roughly seven years ago. And all of Lana’s critics had no
reservations pointing out just how terrible she was.
But in some ways, Lana’s television catastrophe was oddly
adorable. Rarely, does one ever see someone so visibly nervous
on live television. Lana was basically that adorable kid at
the talent show that was raring to go until they finally get
up there, mumble a few words, and promptly freeze. Of course,
when that happens to eight-year-olds, their moms promptly
scoop them up and recite the usual “You were great. I’m still
proud of you. Good for you for getting up onto that stage. ”
Born to Die, Lana’s new album, which debuted this last Monday,
plays out in much the same fashion. Lana is your average pop
star working abnormally hard to be anything but average.
There’s a degree of visible calculated effort in every outfit,
every sultry drawl, and every shrill falsetto. Most pop stars
attempt to appear as a seamless, perfectly polished product.
But with Lana, you can see every gear turning, which while
likely not the intended result, is an oddly endearing side
effect.
Lana Del Rey knows what she wants to be doing; she just has no
idea how to do it correctly. Half her songs are crass and
insipid or overly-stylized mush. She tends to lose her own
plot, and she definitely isn’t at all like the Nancy Sinatra
she aspires to be.
However, in all fairness, at times Lana is dead on. There is a
reason why there was so much hype in the first place. “Video
Games” is still an exceptionally accurate depiction of modern
ennui. “Born to Die and “Blue Jeans” are great pop songs that
embody the aesthetic that she was aiming for.
But try as she might, Lana just comes up that wee bit short.
She has enormously high ambitions and just enough talent and
originality to conceive of realizing them, but she just can’t
manage to pull it off. She’s that red lipstick that you wear,
but aren’t entirely sure is the right shade. Or that pair of
gorgeous platform wedges that, yes, admittedly fit, but you
can’t quite walk properly in.
Lana Del Rey is about to walk into a brave new world of
scrutiny, but at least she gets an A+ for effort. Good for
you, Lana. Good for you.
Mirador Staff Picks Favorite
Youtube Videos
Tired
of
studying
from
finals?
We’re
not
advocating
procrastination, but come on; you were going to “take a quick
study break” (for a couple hours) anyway! Check out the
Mirador’s suggestions for the best videos on the web!
1. Jimmy Kimmel “Terrible Christmas Presents”
2. Coning is the New Planking
3. Murmuration (skip to around 50 seconds! beginning is kind
of boring)
4. Golden Loves Guitar
5. Mommy’s Nose is Scary!
How to Survive Finals
It’s the third week in January, and Finals are just around the
corner. Some students may be stressed out already, while
others are just excited about the short days next week. Here
are five quick tips for surviving your final exams this
semester.
● Don’t spend too much time away from your books:
While finals week does come with shorter school days and extra
time off, you should still spend as much time as you can
studying. The temptation to go out during your time off will
probably be great, but just remember how satisfying it will be
to finish all of your finals knowing that you did well.
● Don’t wait till the last minute!:
You may be preparing for more than one difficult final, but
make sure that you allot plenty of time for each final, and
start studying as far in advance as possible. A 2007 study by
the University of South Florida suggests that cramming before
tests only helps you retain a small amount of information. So
if you’re thinking of studying the night before, think again.
● Get as much sleep as possible:
Studies show that getting a good eight hours of sleep each
night can actually help you perform better on your exams. Not
getting enough sleep can hinder your test taking abilities,
and make you loose concentration easily. So try not to stay up
late studying, because it could end up attributing to you
doing poorly.
● Learn what study techniques work best for you:
Everyone learns in different ways. Some people learn best from
hands-on experience, while others can learn from simply
reading a book. So if you don’t already know how you learn,
try as many techniques as possible, and see what you find the
most useful. Knowing how you learn cannot only help you with
your finals, but it can also help you for all of your tests in
the future.
● Do the review that your teachers assign:
Most teachers assign review assignments the week before they
give their finals. Usually this is the best way to gauge how
you’re going to do on your finals, and these assignments can
help you know what you have forgotten. Also, some of what you
see in your review might even be put on the test, so take a
good look!
Crash on Moraga Way Causes
Power Outage, Major Traffic
Jams
Around 10:00 last night, a toppled power line plunged Orinda
into a temporary power outage. As if that wasn’t enough to
upset the study habits of Miramonte’s hardworking students,
the resulting roadwork shut down a significant portion of
Moraga Way this morning, causing many students to arrive at
school well past the first period tardy bell.
“At about 10:30 last night, we got a call that someone had
crashed into a power line on Moraga Way,” firefighters at
Station 44 said. “We were sleeping, so we got up and headed
over there—but there was no car there. There was just a broken
pole sort of hanging from the telephone lines, but nobody
around.”
The pole that collapsed held a combination of power and
telephone lines, so PG&E and cable companies arrived at the
scene quickly to blockade the road with flares and direct
traffic through a detour.
Three massive cherry pickers drove in to hoist workers to the
top of the power lines where they began sawing the broken pole
into large pieces and lowering them carefully down. They then
inserted a new pole and began to re-wire the cables. About
twenty more large trucks parked nearby aided in the delicate
operation.
“We had to shut this whole area down because it just wasn’t
safe to have cars driving around underneath all this chaos,” a
PG&E representative said.
The workers appeared cheerful and energetic, despite the fact
that many had been on the scene since before sunrise.
If everything remains on schedule, Moraga Way should be open
again by 7:00 tonight, so there may be more delays when school
gets out. Drive carefully on the detours and stay safe!