Discretion By Rev. Albert J. Rinaldi Former Pastor of All Saints Lutheran Church Hamburg, New York Discretion is a virtue. Discretion is learning how to respond to difficult situations with the wisdom and character of Christ. Knowing what is appropriate and what is inappropriate. Discretion is defined as the quality of being discreet, it is the freedom of action or judgment, in other words: leaving choices to your own discretion. Using discretion in our lives can be difficult, but it is good to know that we have the Holy Spirit to help us when it comes to using discretion. •
The Holy Spirit helps us act cautiously in our speech, action and relationships by reminding us to be more like Jesus Christ. Paul wrote to Timothy, “Remember Jesus Christ, and constantly keep Him in mind as risen from the dead.” (2 Tim. 2:8) Ask the Lord to bring to “your” mind how Jesus Christ would discretely speak, act or relate in different situations. •
The Holy Spirit helps us practice good judgment, prudence and wisdom in our decision‐making. Samuel wrote, “May the Lord give you discretion and understanding when He puts you in command over Israel so that you may keep the law of the Lord, your God. Then you will have success.” (I Chron. 22:12) Ask the Lord to give you the mind, attitude and will to practice good judgment, prudence and wisdom in all of your decisions. •
The Holy Spirit helps protect us with His wise discretion by keeping us from careless speech that can entangle us in all kinds of trouble. Discretion is refusing to gossip or talk negatively about other people, other church members, and especially those in leadership. Solomon wrote, “Discretion will protect you, and understanding will guard you. Wisdom will save you from the ways of wicked people, from people whose words are perverse.” (Prov. 2:11,12) Ask the Lord to help you use wise discretion to keep from unwholesome speech as well as from the ways of ungodly people. •
The Holy Spirit helps us when we fail to practice discretion in our personal lives, relationships, or in our ministries. The writer of Hebrews wrote, “No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.” (Heb. 12:11) Learn from the Lord’s discipline so that you can be more discrete. •
The Holy Spirit helps us learn how to not take things personally so we can avoid becoming angry, irritable or annoyed with people. Discretion is being careful not to say things that could spark a fight or argument. Ask the Lord to help you put on a heart of love while refusing to become angry, irritated or annoyed with certain people or problem situations. Discretion Michael B. Herdzik, Sr. Baptist Church of Hamburg The official Character Council of Hamburg definition for discretion is “recognizing and avoiding words, actions, and attitudes that could bring undesirable consequences.” The book of Proverbs was written by King Solomon, the wisest man who ever lived. Not wanting his son to make some of the mistakes he made himself, Solomon wrote the book to his son. He began the book with a purpose statement. Part of that statement is to give “…to the young man knowledge and discretion” (Proverbs 1:4). He certainly didn’t want his son to use words, do actions, or have attitudes that would bring undesirable consequences! The next time he used that word was in the next chapter. “When wisdom entereth into thine heart, and knowledge is pleasant unto thy soul; Discretion shall preserve thee, understanding shall keep thee:” (Proverbs 2:10‐11). Solomon identified that the source of true discretion is the personal internalization of Biblical wisdom. God, as the Author and Designer of life, knows best what words, actions, and attitudes would bring undesirable consequences. It would make great sense, therefore, to know God’s Word, the Bible, and follow it closely. “…Keep sound wisdom and discretion: So shall they be life unto thy soul, and grace to thy neck” (Proverbs 3:21‐22). God would never lead us to act in a way that would cause us to experience negative consequences. Conversely, showing discretion will add to our life and be a blessing to those around us. The last time Solomon wrote of discretion was in connection with anger. It proves the fact that showing discretion will add to our life and be a blessing to those around us. “The discretion of a man deferreth his anger; and it is his glory to pass over a transgression” (Proverbs 19:11). It’s no secret that violent outbursts of anger hurt both the person who blows up and the person who is the recipient of the anger. Discretion allows a person to evaluate the consequences of anger and choose to defer his anger and overlook the wrong done to him. There are a multitude of words, actions, and attitudes that would have undesirable consequences, and the Bible doesn’t speak directly to some of them. Discretion can be applied to every area of life. King David wrote, “A good man…will guide his affairs with discretion” (Psalm 112:5). A good man will apply discretion to every area of his life. Though the Bible doesn’t speak directly to every situation we will face in life, when we take the time to know God’s Word and internalize the wisdom in it, we will realize the ability to exercise discretion in every area of our lives and thereby avoid undesirable consequences for ourselves and those around us. For Further Discussion: 1. What are some words, actions, and attitudes that could bring undesirable results? 2. What does the Bible say about those words, actions, and attitudes? 3. What are some practical steps you can take to avoid them?