7 Reasons Why Women Can’t Orgasm and
How They Can
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7 Reasons Why Women Orgasm And How They Can.
Are you one of the 50% of women who have never achieved orgasm? Or maybe
you can orgasm but only with a vibrator or when you are alone (not with your
partner).
Here are just some of the reasons why women can’t orgasm and what to do
about it.
1. Don’t Know How.
In the same way that our bodies are designed to walk, our bodies are designed to
orgasm. We spent about a year learning how to walk, and a few more years
perfecting it. Orgasm is no different and in just the same way, you need to learn
how to bring your body to orgasm, how to make it move and respond in the right
way.
Practice self pleasuring regularly, say about twice a week, and simply learn how
your body works. Learn your own body’s pleasure and orgasmic response.
2. Too Much Pressure
I don’t mean that you’re pressing too hard. I mean you are putting too much
mental pressure on yourself to orgasm. If you make orgasm the sole purpose and
end goal you actually lose sight of what sexuality is all about. It’s about
pleasure, and much more. Practice self pleasuring with no end goal in sight. Just
do what feels good.
3. No Sense of Self
During orgasm we surrender the ego. The ego is the lower self that mistakenly
things we are our physical bodies, possessions and achievements etc. The lower
self or ego disappears during orgasm. It’s called “surrendering the ego” and the
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result is you become the Greater or Higher Self. This is part of what makes the
experience of orgasm so blissful. However if your lower self forms the major or
only part of your identity, then surrendering it will seem terrifying. When the
only thing you think is “you” goes, you will think you are nothing. Fear of
disappearing or becoming nothing will inhibit your orgasm.
Develop a connection with your Higher or Greater Self and orgasm not only
becomes possible and easy, it actually makes the orgasms you have MUCH more
intense, and blissful. It also means you will be able to connect with your partner
at a soul level.
4. Shame and Guilt
Many children are taught early that sex is wrong, dirty and taboo. Were you
caught self pleasuring and made to feel ashamed or dirty? Until you overcome
and release these painful emotions they will haunt you every time you have sex.
It can show up as that little nagging critical voice. Even when we’re alone in our
bed that inner critic is there with us commenting and judging everything we do.
Lack of self worth will stop your pleasure. If you don’t love yourself or feel
worthy of pleasure you simply won’t allow yourself to feel it. Learning to silence
the inner critic, love yourself enough and give yourself permission to feel
pleasure is essential to becoming orgasmic.
5. The Martyr Culture We Live In
We live in a pleasure-starved culture that worships pain and suffering. All we
hear is “no pain no gain”. The message is clear that suffering and martyrdom
actually buys or earns you something, that it makes you a better person
somehow.
Have you ever worked in a job where everyone brags about how much work they
have to do? How busy they are? Have you noticed people upping the ante of their
suffering by saying “You think you’ve got it bad? Listen to what happened to
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me…” Have you ever had something great happen to you and had someone say
“it’s alright for some...”
With this ethos it’s not surprising we mistakenly learn that pleasure is wrong.
Pain is good. But being proud of suffering does nothing but cause more pain and
suffering. Learn to accept pleasure as your divine birthright. Every time you
experience pleasure you are adding to the sum total of pleasure on the planet.
So do your bit for planetary pleasure and raise its total pleasure quotient.
6. Sexually Numb
Any of the above reasons and others can cause you to completely shut off from
your sexuality. You will be operating only from your head, not your heart, body
and soul. Not only will your sex life be unsatisfying, but it will have a knock on
effect on your relationship, self esteem, and confidence. Sexual energy is very
powerful and fully harnessed gives you charisma, presence, and confidence.
Unlike untamed sexual energy that is slutty, sleazy or flirty and repels people,
harnessed sexual energy will make you magnetically attractive to the right
people.
7. Fear of Wetting the Bed.
I had a client once who said that her biggest fear that stopped her orgasming was
that she would wet the bed!
As I began to allay her fears by telling her that this extremely rare almost
unheard of suddenly thought about what she was saying and said...
“Let me get this right, your biggest fear is that you will have the most intense,
wonderful, blissful climax that is so intense that you pee yourself? Is that right?”
“Yes” she said
I paused and said “Pray for it! Pray it’s that good”
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If you are pre-orgasmic and would like to discover how you can become
orgasmic, achieve a full body orgasm, and increase your sexual energy schedule a
free consultation with Lisa here.
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