Focus Sessions: Marketing
Creating Unlimited Referrals and
Personal Introductions Without Asking
Bill Cates, CSP, CPAE
We’re going to talk about getting referrals without asking
for them. I’m a big believer in asking for referrals. I think
we should all know how to do it. I had a guy call me not too
long ago for a coaching part and he said, “Bill, I will never
ask for referrals ever, ever, ever. Can you still help me?” I
said, “Sure. There are still a lot of things we can do to create
referrals without asking.” To get referrals without asking,
you have to be super referable in the first place, right? How
do you become super referable? Or how do you know you are
super referable, I guess I should say? You’re getting referrals
without asking. It’s kind of one of those Zen Koans. It kind
of goes in a loop, right?
First, who gives referrals? In other words, what does
it take to create that type of relationship quickly with a
prospect or a new client or an ongoing client? Who does
that? How do you become referable quickly? How do you
stay and enhance your referability over time? Then, short of
asking, how can you be appropriately proactive? How can
we stimulate referrals without really asking for them? Then,
how do you make this a habit? How do you implement the
ideas to create some results for yourself? I want to share with
you my complete referral system, and you’ll see how what we
talk about today fits into this. You don’t have to do all these
things to create a thriving referral culture for yourself. You
just need to do a few of them. If you did all of them, that
would be great.
Getting referrals is more than just asking for them.
Obviously, you’ve got to have a referral mindset. You’ve
got to be thinking in the right way and have the right
assumptions. A lot of people have mistaken assumptions.
Some people believe that if they serve the heck out of their
clients, then they’ll get all the referrals they need. I would
say that’s half true. We do have to serve the heck out of
our clients and provide great value. We also have to be
appropriately proactive. I’ll touch on that. You’ve got to
be referable. We’re going to talk a lot about that. Getting
referrals from centers of influence—CPAs, attorneys,
property and casualty, agents, all kinds of folks—can be
great centers of influence for you. What is the key ingredient
in getting referrals from a CPA, from an attorney? It’s being
referable. A lot of agents and advisors have the mistaken
assumption that if they give a CPA or an attorney a referral,
they’ll give referrals back. Let’s find out. Have you ever met
a CPA or an attorney, and maybe you’ve met over lunch?
You told them about your business, and they told you a
little bit about their business, and you send them a couple
of referrals hoping the law of reciprocity will kick in, and
you’re still waiting for the return referrals? Right.
Let’s understand that CPAs were born without the
reciprocity gene. When I work with a group that has CPAs
in the room, they’ll usually come up to me and agree with
that. They are very risk-averse people. So, just because you
send CPAs or attorneys referrals doesn’t mean they’re going
to send them back to you. It rarely means they’re going to
send them back to you. We have to formalize the relationship
a bit more. We have to make sure that they know our full
value. We’ll talk about that as we go. Promoting referrals—
we’ll talk about being appropriately proactive. Turning
referrals into an introduction. There was a time when we
could get names, phone numbers, call people up, and
Bill Cates, CSP, CPAE
Cates, president of Referral Coach International, is widely recognized as the financial services’ foremost
expert in building a thriving referral-based business. His books, Get More Referrals Now! and Don’t Keep
Me a Secret! have revolutionized the way financial professionals acquire clients through referrals. His
latest book, Beyond Referrals, is a groundbreaking next step in client acquisition strategies. The creator
of “The Referral Advantage Program” and “The Referral Champions System,” Cates has seen his work
featured in Success magazine, Entrepreneur magazine, Selling Power, and the Wall Street Journal and
his own business featured in Money magazine.
Referral Coach International
6116 Eternal Ocean Place - Ste. 102, Clarksville, MD 21029 USA
email: [email protected] phone: +1 301-497-2200
View this presentation in the Resource Zone at mdrt.org or purchase from mdrtstore.org.
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©Million Dollar Round Table
©2016 Referral Coach International. For use by attendees of 2016 MDRT Annual Meeting for private internal use only, and not for training of or use by others.
No duplication, derivative works, or transfer allowed. All rights reserved.
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actually reach them on the phone, right? Set appointments,
and do business. Is it hard to reach people these days? Yes, it
really is, isn’t it? It’s become harder and harder. When you
look at the younger generation, how are they doing it? With
texts, right? If you’re like me, I’m not used to contacting a
prospect with a text. It just feels a little strange. For folks my
daughter’s age, no problem. We do have to get connected.
We have to get introduced in some way. You need to set the
appointment, obviously.
Another mistaken assumption I see many folks make
is that if they get a referral prospect they can approach
that referral prospect for an appointment the same way
they approach any other prospect. That’s really a wasted
opportunity because there’s so much that goes on in the
referral relationship and getting the introduction is a huge
opportunity to leverage that referral when you’re setting
appointments to set more appointments. Obviously, you’ve
got to turn the prospect into a client. You’ve got to keep
the courtship alive. You want to maximize events. Event
marketing. Through some of those things you’ll start
getting more referrals. Today, we’re going to talk about your
referability and promoting referrals. Who gives referrals?
Let’s look at the blue line here. [visual] You can see satisfied
clients. Satisfied clients are very loyal—99 percent loyal, yet
only 20 percent of those folks gave referrals in the preceding
12 months. So, there’s actually a low correlation between
client satisfaction and the giving of referrals. That surprised
me a bit when I saw it because we’re always working very
hard to have satisfied, loyal clients, so what’s better than that?
Engaged clients. Engaged clients have 100 percent loyalty.
A study by Julia Littlechild showed that 98 percent of engaged
clients gave one or more referrals in the last 12 months. So,
who gives referrals? Engaged clients give referrals. Engaged
prospects. Engaged centers of influence. That’s the goal now.
That’s what we need to create. What do I mean by engaged?
They’re engaged in your value. They see your value; they
understand your value; they appreciate your value. They also
feel engaged with you as an individual, as a person. If people
see your value but maybe don’t connect with you individually,
are they going to give you referrals or introductions? Probably
not. If they like you, if they’re connected with you but
don’t see your value, are they going to give you referrals or
introductions? Probably not. So we have to create both of
those things, right? With CPAs and attorneys and folks like
that, it takes longer to create that sense of engagement with
us. As I said, giving a couple of referrals to them isn’t really
going to create that sense of engagement.
©Million Dollar Round Table
The good news is that we can engage some prospects and
clients we pretty quickly. It doesn‘t have to take a long time.
Have you ever gotten referrals from people before they even
become clients? Sure you have. What was there? A sense of
engagement with your value and with you as an individual.
We want to try to replicate that sense of engagement and
create it as much as we can. Have you heard of Maslow‘s
hierarchy of needs? We‘ll call this Cates‘s hierarchy of
engagement. Maslow’s hierarchy of needs: shelter, food,
football, beer? You know, things like that. Let me give you a
sense of what we’re going for here in our relationships with our
clients, so we can create this thriving referral-based business
without even asking for referrals. That’s the theme today. We
need to have a great initial process. In other words, we have
to create prospect engagement. That’s not a term you hear
much, is it? You hear about client engagement. We have to
engage our clients, but you don’t really hear about prospect
engagement. What I mean by that is you want to make sure
you have a process that’s referable. Your initial process in
this industry is the fact finder, the discovery meeting, right?
Doing a financial plan, whatever you call it. We have to have
that process that makes us referable. How do you know your
process is referable? You’re getting referrals without asking.
That’s one of the barometers.
I’ll give you a few ideas on how to make your process
more referable, more engaging. Obviously, you have to have
responsive service. You have to take care of your clients, if,
for example, they need a change in policy ownership, or
beneficiary, or whatever it may be. We’ve got to respond
quickly. This responsiveness helps with a little bit of the
engagement, but it’s not usually enough. We have to do
more with our relationship. We have to keep bringing value.
If we don’t keep bringing value into the relationship, then
of course we are no longer necessary. So, are we staying in
touch with our clients over time because it continues to
bring value? Not only because we want to get referrals over
time, but also because we want to keep the client loyalty at
the same time. Then there’s the business friendship. I call
that the turbocharger for referrals, the turbocharger for
engagement. All of you know what a business friendship
with a client looks like. You’ve all had some. Some of them
happened naturally, very organically. I’ll give you a few ideas
here on how to be more proactive and systematic in creating
those business friendships.
That’s the engagement with you as an individual, right?
Remember, who gives referrals? Engaged clients. They feel
engaged with our value; they feel engaged with us as an
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individual. Ultimately, you create that advocacy for you.
Some of you may be familiar with the late, great Csaba
Sziklai and his program, Advocacy. That’s really what we
want. We want people who are advocates for us as individuals
and the value of the work that we bring to the table. We
want them to become advocates for both. I do believe that
a referral process needs to be client centered. It needs to be
about the client, about the value, and not so much about
us. How many of you were trained at some point in your
career to say to your clients, “Let me tell you how I get paid.
I get paid in two ways. One of those ways is referrals”? Many
of you. While it worked for a while, and I understand the
purpose behind it, it foreshadows the possibility of referrals
down the road. We know that when it comes to referrals in
the financial services world, a lot of people are reluctant to do
them. If we set it up as an obligation early in the relationship,
we actually could be hurting that sense of engagement with
us rather than increasing it. So, we’ll talk about some things
you can do to create that proactivity, that foreshadowing for
referrals without creating any tension in the first relationship.
There does come a time, however, in the relationship
where I do believe we can pull back the curtain and talk
about where we’re headed. Talk about where we’re trying to
go. Once you build that business friendship, right? In the
work you do with clients, you become confidantes for them,
do you not? They tell you things they don’t tell other people.
They tell you things you don’t even want to hear sometimes.
In that, they feel a sense of engagement with and trust you,
and they share their vision. At some point it becomes very
natural, and I think OK, to share our vision for where we’re
headed and what we’re trying to do, and that creates that
sense of advocacy. Let’s talk about a few things that will
help you stimulate the sense of engagement early in a new
relationship. I think one of the biggest benefits that you
can bring to a new relationship is clarity. Helping people
get clear on where they are, clear on where they are going
to be and want to be, and clear on how to get there. It’s all
about clarity. People want confidence and clarity. Those are
the big drivers around the financial aspect of their life. They
want confidence and clarity. You can look at all the different
motivators that people talk about in this industry, and I
think most of the time it boils down to a sense of clarity and
confidence. Confidence. Clarity.
I like to call it “going from here to there.” I got that
expression from Bill Whitley out of North Carolina. I realize
many other people have talked about that over the years, but,
essentially, we explore with clients where are you now? As an
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individual, couple. Where do you want to go, and what are
the obstacles to getting there? So, you do that through questions. You provide value through the questions you ask. I like
to get it from here to there. I like to start with the here: what’s
going on? Maybe we talk about a few positive things first. A
great question of course is, What’s going on in your life that
is important right now? What are some of your top priorities
right now? This, by the way, is a great question to ask a client
referring you to someone. If you have a client who refers you to
a friend, a family member, or a colleague, one of the first questions you want to ask is, What’s going on in your life that’s
important to you right now. What are they going to tell you?
They’re going to tell you about their family, their kids, their
business, retirement, their faith, community service, whatever
it may be, right? If you can tie the work you do to what’s going
on in their lives that’s important to them, you now have a
compelling reason for why they should meet with you. One of
the reasons people have trouble setting appointments in this
business is that they don’t have a compelling reason for why
that person should meet with them.
People are very busy, and if you don’t give them a
compelling reason, then they’re not going to take time
out of their day to meet with you. The good news is that
in the referral process we can learn that. We can find out
what’s going on in their life. We can create that compelling
introduction. So that’s one great question to ask early. What
are some of the best financial decisions you’ve made? Let
them brag a little bit. When you ask this question, you are
again learning about their “here,” what’s going on for them
now. You’re learning about their financial decision-making
process. You’re getting a feel for them. We never want to sell
anything without a bigger context. You do clients a disservice
if you sell them life or long-term care or DI or whatever
it may be if it’s out of a bigger context. We need a bigger
context here. Of course, creating that bigger context allows
you to bring more things to the table than just the product
that you may be leading with, right? Also, who in their lives
has made financial decisions that they really respect? This is a
great question because first of all, you’re learning about their
relationship with financial decisions and that helps you serve
them better. Also, you’re learning about other people in their
world whom you might be able to help at some point down
the road. Through our fact finder, our discovery process, the
planning process, there’s a parallel process going on.
It’s like playing pool. We’re thinking of the next shot,
too. Not only are we trying to serve these people and learn
how to serve them better, but also we want to learn who
©Million Dollar Round Table
Creating Unlimited Referrals and Personal Introductions Without Asking
else is in their world, don’t we? At some point in time, we
may be able to leverage that knowledge to be able to help
more people. Then, how are you feeling about your financial
decision? You’ve heard this before. I got this from Dan
Sullivan’s Strategic Coach. He calls it the R-factor question,
which you can plug into any time frame. He uses three years
in his. You can plug in any time frame based on your client’s
age and what you know about your client. So, if we were
meeting years from today, what has to happen for you to feel
good? Clear and confident, if you want to use those words.
Clear and confident about your financial situation. Now,
you’re starting to get a sense of their “there.” What does their
“there” look like five years from now, 10 years from now, 20
years from now? Whatever that may be. Some people know
the answer to this question. Some people have no clue. They
haven’t really thought about it. That’s why we’re providing
value by asking questions they haven’t even thought of. What
obstacles do you see in making this happen? They may know
some obstacles that they’re aware of based on their own life.
Based on your experience, you may know some obstacles
that they wouldn’t think of, and that’s how you start to help
them, by identifying the obstacles and the opportunities.
You want to help them identify the obstacles and opportunities getting from here to there. This is a great, robust initial
process you can bring. Many of you are probably doing
something like this, but maybe you like the framing that
we put around it. Let people know. When you call someone up on the phone, say, “Hey, you know, we have a very
specific process. I want to ask you about 10 questions that,
when we formulate or you formulate the answers to those
questions, you will be glad we met. You will be glad that we
got together. Even if we don’t go any further, you will find
that 20 or 30 minutes of our time extremely valuable.” Have
a process and lead with the process that you know brings
value. I was working with one advisor with a wire house and
what they teach these new advisors there is to call people up
looking for a second opinion. A second opinion approach,
I guess, to appointment setting. It can work occasionally.
Lightning strikes. Occasionally you hit someone who is open
to it. Maybe they’re not happy with whom they’re working
with, or something’s happened in their life, and they don’t
mind talking to somebody new. It’s a pretty weak, uncompelling reason to get together.
So, we want to have a more compelling reason. A more
compelling reason is a very specific process you bring to
the table that will bring value to them whether they move
forward and work with you or not. That process brings value
©Million Dollar Round Table
and is indeed referable. Then, of course, you want to ask, “Are
you open to some ideas?” This is the request to do business.
“Let’s work together.” You’ve probably heard this before. I’ve
been teaching this for 20 years, long before books came out
about this. It is the power of your personal why, meaning
your passion for the work you do and what you believe in
the work you do. I’m not talking about why you first got
started in this business, which is that you like working with
finances, and you can make money and have flexibility of
your schedule. That’s why most people get started in this
business. Somewhere along the line you realize you actually
help people, right? Almost every time I do a session, I find
some in the session who had the mixed opportunity, if you
want to call it that, to deliver a death benefit check within
the first few months of working in this business. It’s a sad
situation, but then they really get in touch with the value
they bring, right? So, where are the sources of this why, your
personal why that you want to communicate to prospects?
Remember, we’re trying to create that sense of engagement
with our value and engagement with us as an individual.
That’s the underlying theme behind all of these strategies.
It could be why you got into this business. It could be why
you’re still in the business. You’ve been doing this for a long
time. Let people know why you’re excited about it now more
than ever before, or why you’re still excited about it. Maybe
you changed companies recently. Let them know why you
did that and why you’re with the company you’re with now.
Maybe it’s something that happened to you or happened
to someone else. Let me tell you about Carol. Carol is a
financial professional in California. I did a webinar for
NAIFA-California about a year ago last fall. About two days
after that, she sent me an email and said, “Bill, I used to be
pretty bad at getting referrals. I’ve been in this business for
12 years, but in the last two days, I’ve gotten eight unsolicited
referrals just by talking about my personal why.” Obviously
I was very curious about what she was saying. We got on
the phone. I even recorded the conversation. I said, “Tell me
more about this.”
So, here’s what Carol does, and it works very well for her.
She and her husband, before she got into this business, got
some bad advice, made some bad financial decisions, and
lost most of their money. It was a very tough time for them.
They slowly got back on their feet. Now they’re doing pretty
well. When she’s sitting down with an individual or a couple
talking about the work she does, she says, “You know, let
me tell you a little bit about why I’m in this business.” Then
she tells them some of that story about how she got some
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bad advice and how it created a tough problem for her, and
she says to her prospect, “The reason I’m in this business
is because I want to make sure that that never happens to
anybody else.” So what does that do? It opens her up to
clients. They connect with her as an individual. Remember,
we need people to connect with us as individuals if we want
to turn them into clients and get referrals. The energy in
the room changes. She’s getting unsolicited referrals just by
telling her story, telling a little bit about herself.
We have a keynote presenter who is going to talk about
telling your personal story. To me, it’s the why. Why are you
doing what you do? Some of you may be already doing this.
How many of you early on in a brand new relationship talk
about why you do what you do? Does it make a difference?
Do you feel a different energy in the room when you do
that? Do they connect with you as an individual and also
to your value at the same time? It’s a very powerful strategy.
So, if you’re not doing that, please do it. Some of you may
have multiple whys, multiple things you can share. Don’t do
them all at once. It’s not a big why dump, but over time you
can certainly do it. Here’s one more important thing. This is
not your opportunity to do therapy, right? Carol’s not doing
therapy about losing all that money in front of her prospects
or clients. She’s already healed on that one. Now it’s her why
she’s in business.
Talk to your prospects about how you’re going to stay
in touch, how you’re going to stay in touch with them over
time. Talk to them about your client service model because
what happens when you talk to them about how you’re
going to stay in touch over time is that they get that feeling,
that sense of engagement before they even work with you.
We want to create that sense of engagement, so we’re going
to meet once, twice a year, or whatever it is for you and
their situation. I have an e-newsletter I’m going to send out
to you. Let’s break bread around your birthday. We have
a golfing thing in the summer. Whatever it is, make sure
you communicate that. Let me tell you a quick story. Al
Fox, a finance professional in Mount Laurel, New Jersey, is
very successful in this business. I’ve been coaching for 10
years, doing very well—all through referrals. He told me a
story. Something happened about two years ago. He had a
referral prospect in his office. He started to talk about his
client service promise, how they were going to stay in touch.
About halfway through he said this prospect just stopped
and said, “Wait a second, Al. Is this is the way you’ve been
staying in touch with my friend Rick?” Al said, “Yes, our
client service promise.” He says, “You know, I think the only
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time I talk to my advisor is when I call him.” Two weeks
later this guy moves his business, moves his account to Al.
He brought $2.5 million of investments under management
to Al’s business.
There’s an advisor out there with the $2.5 million client
whose perception is that the only time they ever talk is when
he calls the advisor. So what’s going on there? It’s reactive
practice versus proactive practice. We’ll talk in a minute
about your client service promise and what goes into it.
Make sure you talk about it, I would say, at the very first
appointment. Even before someone becomes a client. Let
them know what it would look like. There’s a darn good
chance that whomever they worked with in the past didn’t
have a client service model, didn’t have a plan. They kind of
winged it when it came to staying in touch with their clients.
So you will look different. Al tells me that by talking about
this client service promise, he can feel the energy in the room
change. He wins business, especially for high-level prospects,
high-level clients, just by talking about how he’s going to
stay in touch. It just creates that sense of engagement. Let’s
talk about your client service promise. Let’s talk about what
it looks like. I like the word promise.
Think about it: if you are in front of a center of influence
or a prospective client and you say, “Let me tell you about our
client service plan, or let me tell you about our client service
model,” there’s nothing wrong with that. I think that’s good.
If you say, “Let me tell you about our client service promise,”
do you hear the difference in that? The word promise. I think
in the word promise is kind of the word commitment. It has
more emotional oomph to it. So I recommend you use that
word. Obviously you have to segment your client base to do
this. You want to know who your As are, who your Bs are,
and who your Cs are, and your Ys. You have a few Ys, don’t
you? Why am I still talking to this guy? We all have a few
of those. You want to make sure because obviously you can’t
give everyone the same high level of service. That’s a mistake
I’ve seen some people make. They try to give everybody the
same. What happens is that some people get overserved, and
a lot of people get underserved. They get the lowest common
denominator. From there you craft your plan. At least for
your A clients, at least for those A clients that you want to
clone, make sure you have this model. This is not a new
concept for you. I know you know about this. The question
is, do you have one and are you using it? Are you talking
about it to your prospects and to your clients?
You need to have a way to keep bringing value. There are
a lot of different ways to keep bringing value. Here’s a list of
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Creating Unlimited Referrals and Personal Introductions Without Asking
them. [visual] Obviously, review meetings and things you can
drip on your clients, compliance approved, of course. Valueoriented phone calls. Not all will apply to you in the work you
do, but most of them will. I want to talk about the bottom
one. This is one I see not happening as much as I think it
should and it really creates value. That’s taking a leadership
role in people’s lives. Would you agree with me that most
people, even smart and successful people, put off doing the
right thing for themselves and their families? Of course they
do. We’re preaching to the choir when it comes to that.
Let people know that it’s your intention, it’s your job.
You see your role as taking a leadership in people’s lives. It
goes a little something like this. “Brandon, one thing I’ve
noticed in doing this work for so long is that many people,
people like yourself, successful, smart, put off doing the right
thing—for themselves, for their family, for their business.
So, as we work together, there may come some times where
I see you doing that. I see it as my job to take kind of a
leadership role, to nudge you if you will, into doing the right
thing. Are you okay with that? OK, good.”
People want accountability, right? That’s why they hire
you. That’s why they want you in their lives. So you’re just
going to foreshadow that possibility. What happens two
years later when I’m working with Brandon, and he’s putting
something off. I say, “Brandon, remember when we first got
together a couple of years ago? I mentioned that people,
smart people, often put off doing the right thing?” “Yeah.”
“And you gave me permission to nudge you a little bit? Well,
this is one of those times.” Now, because I foreshadowed that
two years ago, does it make it easier for me to push him
now? Absolutely. Then, if you have the business friendship
cooking at the same time, it’s an easy thing. Let me give you
an example from my own life. When I was, I guess, 50 years
old, so a while ago, I was on a cruise ship. Phyllis Shelton was
speaking on a cruise ship. You all know Phyllis? Long-term
care insurance specialist and advocate. I realized I probably
was a candidate for long-term care. So I called Larry up.
I said, “Larry, I just heard this great speaker, and I think
I might be a candidate for long-term care.” We were just
starting to work together. He said, “Yeah, I think you are
as well. We should talk about it.” I said, “Great. Let’s make
sure we talk about it when we get together.” He said okay. So
we got together, and I guess he detected the buying signals
because he showed up with an application for long-term care
insurance. I said, “Larry, this is great. I know I probably
need this. Would you mind if I fax it?” This is before we
had a lot of email. He said, “Yeah, by all means, do that.”
©Million Dollar Round Table
I faxed it to Phyllis Shelton to see what she thought. She
said, “Yeah, it’s good. Good firm, good policy. Sign it. You
need it. You’re a candidate. Go for it.” What did I do? I put
it off as people do. So, I was playing golf with Larry one
summer, or the next summer. He said, “You know, Bill, can
I buy you a soda when we’re done?” I said, “Yeah, sure.” He
says, “There’s something I want to talk to you about.” I said,
“Great.” So, we sat down for a soda after we’re done with our
round of golf. He pulls out a manila file folder with what in
it? An application for long-term care. He says, “Bill, we’re
not leaving until you sign this.” What did I do? I signed it. I
had to go, so I signed it.
Taking a leadership role. There are a lot of different
places where you can take the leadership role. How about
intergenerational wealth? You can help by making sure that
parents are talking to their children and vice versa to see
that they’re handling the transfer of wealth responsibly. A lot
of people don’t like to talk about that. Families don’t do it,
not necessarily because they don’t want to, but because they
don’t know how to do it. You come and take a leadership
role, and you facilitate that conversation. You bring a
tremendous value by helping them collect and organize their
essential documents. That’s another way to take a leadership
role in people’s lives. Staying in touch in a way that provides
value, not just a dripping electronic e-zine on them that
they probably don’t even open, but with ways to engage and
provide value.
Then, of course, building the business friendship. In Julia
Littlechild’s study, she asked why people give referrals. She
found that 61 percent give referrals to help someone else.
We know that most people give referrals to help a friend, a
family member, or colleague, but 37 percent give referrals to
help their advisor, their agent. What if we can harness both
of those energies? We can put both of those in play at the
same time. That’s pretty powerful. That’s where the business
friendship comes in. There are a lot of different things you
can do to create business friendships. I’m a huge advocate
of client appreciation events. Let me give you a couple of
thoughts about appreciation events. I’m a big believer in
smaller events. The purpose of the event is to connect; it’s
not to impress people on how big a party you can throw.
It’s to connect with those people, with the clients, with the
guests that may come.
My advisor Larry did a big luau last summer. He must
have had 250 people on the shore of Chesapeake Bay. A
luau. Chesapeake Bay. It should have been a crab feast, but
nonetheless it was a luau. I showed up. I signed my name.
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My girlfriend was with me at the time (now she’s the fiancée,
not the girlfriend). Anyway, so, Larry greeted me and said,
“There’s the food. There’s the drink. There’s the volleyball.
There’s the bay. Go have fun.” Now, did I really connect
with Larry? Not much. Just a little. He didn’t really connect
much with anybody that day. So, small events. Dinner with
eight to 10 people at the most. Wine and cheese or chocolate
appreciation with 15, 16, or 18 people. Keep them small.
Celebration events.
I’ll talk more about celebration events in a second. It’s the
ultimate client engagement event. It’s the ultimate way to
create that business friendship and build your business at the
same time. There are different things you can do, obviously.
There are different things that happen in people’s lives that
you can celebrate. Let me tell you about a couple of folks.
Gail is an advisor in Red Bank, New Jersey. Gail likes the
idea of taking her clients out for a birthday lunch with their
colleagues from work. She did this about six months ago.
She called her client up. We’ll call him George. She said,
“George, you’ve got your big 5-0 coming up. I’d like to take
you to lunch. Why don’t you invite a few of your colleagues
from work?” George told her it was a great idea. So, they’re
having lunch. Three or four of his colleagues are around the
table, and they’re getting ready to leave. One of the guys
lingers a little longer and says, “Gail, you know, George has
said some nice things about you. I’d love you to take a look
at our situation.” She does, and he brings $1.3 million over
into her practice to manage, just from a lunch.
Let me tell you about Joe De Sena. Joe’s on Long Island.
Very successful. He puts on retirement parties. He calls his
client up; we’ll call him Bob. He says, “Bob, you’re retiring
in a few months. I’d like to help you celebrate.” Bob says,
“That’s great. Thank you. What do you have in mind?”
“Well, I want to throw you a party. I want you to send me
a guest list, maybe 15 or 16 people. We’ll invite everybody.
We’ll do all the work. You just show up as the guest of
honor.” So Joe and his staff invite people. They see that the
advisor’s doing this. It’s not the spouse, it’s not the colleague
from work, it’s not a neighbor. The advisor’s putting on this
little event. That stands out right there, right? So, everybody
shows up, and Bob puts his arm around Joe and says, “You
know, I wouldn’t be retiring right now if it wasn’t for Joe De
Sena and the great work he’s done for me. Not only has he
been a great advisor, but as you can see from this evening,
he’s been a great friend.” That’s when it starts. “Psst. Joe.
Got a card? Yeah, love to talk to you about our situation.
My cheapskate advisor never does anything like this.”
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Joe averages five or six new clients every time he does this.
Why? Because he demonstrates the kind of value and relationship he has with his clients. Many of the people at these
events don’t have that kind of relationship with their financial professional, and they want that kind of relationship. So,
think about putting on events, appreciation events.
The question is, do you first come up with a budget and
then see what you can do within that budget and how many
clients you can touch, or do you figure out what you want to
do first and then come up with a budget of what it’s going
to take? Actually, I think either could work. Probably what
I would do is that I wouldn’t worry too much about a big
budget. I’d just do a couple of events. I’d start small. You
want these events to be small because number one, you’re not
in a meeting planning business. You’re not a special events
business, right? You don’t want it to consume all your time or
your staff’s time. You want to keep it really small.
I think the first thing you want to do is maybe just
identify a couple of your A clients, people that you want to
make sure stay with you. Maybe people who are fairly well
connected. Maybe they could become centers of influence
if they’re not already. Find a way to celebrate something
in their lives. I would just start to look at your book of
business among your A clients and see who’s got some stuff
coming up. Rather than creating a budget for a year or a
plan for a whole year, let’s try it a couple of times and see
if it feels right. See how the clients react. Work some of the
bugs out. Then I’d probably go to the next level, perhaps.
So, what happens, of course, with the celebration event? The
worst thing that happens is you have a client for life and an
incredible engagement, and you’ve upped your referability,
and you’re also meeting more people. You’re meeting people
like them. So, obviously you do it with your A clients, so you
can get referrals to people like them.
You’re not talking about your business, really. This really
is a celebration event. It’s different from a referral event or
a prospecting event, so make sure you have this promise in
place. Make sure you use it. Make sure you talk about it.
That can make a big difference for you. We talked about
becoming referable over time. Let’s talk a little bit about
being proactive. A study by Advisor Impact in Toronto found
that 40 percent of people who gave referrals did it because
they were asked, but 72 percent gave referrals because they
were asked for feedback and input. Asking for feedback and
input from our clients is huge, yet most businesses don’t
check in with their clients very often. When I check out of
a hotel, which is pretty frequently, they ask, “How was the
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Creating Unlimited Referrals and Personal Introductions Without Asking
stay?” It’s pretty robotic. When I take my car in for service,
I get a call from a teenager a few days later. “How was the
service experience?” Right? I bought a sunroom for one of
my past houses, and the last I heard from them was a little
door hanger on the doorknob.
I wanted to buy a hot tub a couple years ago. I went to
a place in Rockville, Maryland, called Hydro Pool. This
young man by the name of Alex greets me, and I give Alex
a copy of my book, Get More Referrals Now. He looks at it
and says, “Oh, referrals. This is good. Did you write this?”
I go, “Yeah.” He says, “Bill Cates, Gates. Bill Gates? Cates.
Ha! You missed it by one letter.” Yeah, like I’ve never heard
that before. He says, “Are you a sales trainer or something?”
I say, “No, no. I just help people build their business with
referrals.” He says, “That’s cool.”
So, for the next 45 minutes, we’re talking sales skills,
referral skills, and hot tubs. Hot tubs, sales skills, referral
skills. Forty-five minutes in he says, “Bill, based on this
conversation I was thinking now would be a good time to go
for the close. What do you think?” I said, “Alex, give it a shot
and see what happens.” So I bought a hot tub. Never heard
from Alex again. Now, first of all, who’s not going to be happy
with a hot tub? Second of all, if there’s one person on this
planet from whom you might ask referrals, it’s the guy who’s
written four books on the topic, right? Most people don’t
follow up, don’t check in. Why is that? I think sometimes
they’re afraid of a negative response. They don’t want to
disturb anything. If there’s something not working, don’t
you need to know it? Because you’re not referable, right? They
could be bad-mouthing you, and in these days of social media,
the whole world could know about it pretty quickly. So, we’ve
got to follow up. We’ve got to check in. I call this a value
discussion. Conducting a value discussion. This is critical to
do even if you never ask for referrals because it creates a sense
of engagement. It will generate referrals without even asking.
Ann McCallum in Phoenix got a $1.3 million client just by
checking in and saying, “How are we doing?”
It reveals problems. You’ve got to see if there’s a problem.
Harvard Business Review published a study that said if clients
don’t rate you as completely satisfied, they’re candidates
to move their business somewhere else. They didn’t say
mostly satisfied; they said completely satisfied. If there’s a
gap between where they are and where they’d like to be, in
that gap is where they can move their business somewhere
else, or you’re certainly not referable. We’ve got to find out
what that gap is. Obviously, it brings the value to life. They
get a sense of the value. Then, sometimes, like I said, you
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get referrals without asking, and I gave you some specific
examples. Get the picture? Obviously this will depend on
what you say. The words you use will depend on where you
are in the relationship. If it’s a brand new relationship, the
first or second meeting, you may say, “We talked about a lot
of things here this evening. What are one or two of the most
important things we talked about? Or what’s the one thing
that stands out as the most important thing we’ve discussed
so far?” That’s a way to check in.
Let’s say they decide to work with you. Let’s say they’re
going to go into underwriting with a life policy. You say,
“You’ve made a very important decision. You’re moving
forward with something that a lot of people put off. We’ve
talked about what happens when you do put this off. I’m
curious about what tipped the scales for you. What made
you decide to move forward?” Then they’ll tell you why they
decided to move forward. What are they doing? They’re
reselling themselves on the decision they made, which is not
a bad thing. They’re also getting in touch with the value.
That’s not a bad place, by the way, to ask for referrals. I know
this is about getting referrals without asking. They’ve written
the check or they’ve given permission to withdraw from their
account these days, and they haven’t been rated yet, so it’s
not a bad time to ask for referrals.
Delivery of a policy or a plan. We’ve been to a process
to get to this point, have we not? Can you tell me the value
you feel you’ve gotten from the process? So, now you make
it about the process. Or, at a review meeting, is anything not
working? Has anybody dropped the ball that we should be
aware of? And what is working? Start off with a negative.
Usually there’s not going to be a problem. Usually there’s
nothing that’s not working, but every now and then you’re
going to pick up on a client who might be a little disgruntled
about something. You’ll clean it up, get the emotional
attachment to it gone, and then you shift to what is working.
“Tell me what is working. How do we continue to earn your
business, or how do we continue to earn your loyalty?” This
is one of the most powerful things you can do to create
referrals without even asking.
Larry uses this. He doubled his revenue in a year just by
using this VIPS process. I did a program in Baton Rouge,
Louisiana, not that far from here. There were 41 financial
advisors in the room. The manager got up, and he gave
them a little incentive. He said, “For those of you who do
this in-person value discussion over the next six weeks,
I’m going to give you $100. Just a little incentive to have
these value discussions.” Well, 16 of these folks completed
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that assignment on time, and the 16 advisors generated
132 unsolicited referrals just from the value check-in.
Just checking in makes a huge difference. The minimum
behavior is that we check in, and then plant the seed, which
we’re going to talk about now.
There are a many different ways to plant the seeds for
referrals or introductions. Promote referrals or introductions.
One way is to just celebrate the fact that you met through a
referral or an introduction. “Brandon, it’s great sitting down
with you. I appreciate the phone conversations we’ve had.
My guess is, sir, that I wouldn’t be here right now if it wasn’t
for George recommending we get together. Is that true? I
have to tell you, that’s the way this business works. People see
the value of what we do, they introduce me to other people
they care about. You feel a little more comfortable. I feel
a little more comfortable. It kind of makes sense, doesn’t
it?” That’s it. Have I asked him for referrals? No, of course
not. It’s too soon. I just met the guy. Have I promoted the
possibility? Yes, by celebrating the fact that we met through a
referral. When prospects sit down with you for the very first
time from a referral, an introduction from someone else they
already trust, do they feel a little more comfortable sitting
down with you? Of course they do. So, what I just said there,
it’s not a gimmick, it’s not a trick. It’s truth. I’m just shining
a little light on something they know to be true. There are a
lot of different ways to do this. Here’s another one.
“Christine, as we get started here, let me alert you to
something that happens very frequently. I’ll be doing this
process with folks, and they just naturally start to think of
other people in their lives. ‘Should my friend do this, or my
sister? I wonder if my parents did this, or are my children
old enough.’ It’s kind of a natural thing that happens. So,
if it does, just let me know. Bring it up. We’ll finish what
we’re doing with you here, and then we’ll see if it doesn’t
make sense for you to introduce me to them, so they can be
educated like you are today.” So, something like that, right?
We know this happens. Has anybody ever been doing
your fact finding or just going through your process and
making recommendations, and had someone think of
someone without you bringing it up? We know that when
we do a good job and ask good questions, people internally
are reflecting on other people in their lives. I’m just shining a
little light on that dynamic. I’m just saying this is something
that happens. Let me alert you. That’s a nice word. That kind
of catches your attention. Let me alert you to something that
happens. Now, as Christine and I do our work together, and
she thinks of someone, she’s more likely to bring it up, isn’t
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she? She’s more likely to say, “You know, you’re right. I just
thought of my sister and brother-in-law, and I think they
should know about what you do.” It’s as simple as that, right?
We’re getting referrals, stimulating referrals without even
asking for them.
Sam was at my last boot camp. We do it every March or
April. He said, “I used one of the referral seed ideas with a
client I worked with. I told him it was natural for my clients
to think of others as they went through this process. About
halfway through, he stopped and gave me two names. He
immediately began brainstorming ways for him to introduce
me to those people. It was totally unexpected and natural.
Just doing what we did there.” This stuff works. This is not
just theory. I’ve been doing this for 20 years. This produces
results. I’ve been teaching this for a long time.
Don’t keep me a secret. Many of you know this. I’ve
got a book with this title on it. Now, this has a little bit
of humor to it. If you say, “Don’t keep me a secret,” there’s
a little smile at the end of that. If you don’t have a sense
of humor, don’t do this one. Let me give you a couple of
examples of folks who have success with this. Dick Davidson
up near Minneapolis says, “Since I have a lot of fear around
asking for referrals, I thought I would just start adding the
phrase ‘Don’t keep me a secret’ on all handwritten thankyou notes and say it at the end of the meetings. In just four
weeks, I’ve received 10 referrals, set 10 appointments, and
closed seven of them just by saying ‘Don’t keep me a secret.’”
Larry DeNoia of Westchester County, New York, told me
this story. It happened a few years ago. He had a client in
his office and said, “I’m still taking on new clients. Please
don’t keep me a secret.” She thought of her sister, whom they
talked about in the past, but something must have happened
because at 6:30 Friday evening, Larry gets a call from the
sister. “Mr. DeNoia, I’d like to meet with you as quickly
as possible.” They set up a meeting for Monday, and at that
meeting, she became a client and brought almost a million
dollars to invest with him, just from his saying “Don’t keep
me a secret” on Friday. I don’t know about you, but I’ve
tried this a few times. First of all, it’s not going to hurt the
relationship. If you say “Don’t keep me a secret,” are they
going to say, “Oh, I can’t believe you said that. Give me my
check back”? No, of course not. They’ll say, “Sure. We’ll
keep you in mind.”
Getting referrals without asking. I’m never too busy to
see if I can be a resource for other people you care about.
Notice I said “never too busy to see if I can be a resource.”
These are qualifying words. If you’ve been at this for a while,
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and not everyone fits your business anymore, you’re trying
to get referred up on the economic ladder—never too busy
to see if I can be a resource. On the other hand, if you’re
fairly new in this business, if they fog a mirror, you’ll talk
to them, meaning they’re breathing. Never too busy to be
a resource. You’re taking the see out of there. The resource.
I got that word from Gail Goodman. Many of you know
Gail Goodman, phone teacher. I think when you’re calling
people up or sending an email to prospects, position yourself
as an additional resource. You don’t want to threaten any
relationships they already have in place because if they feel
threatened, they feel like you’re trying to replace whom
they’re working with. Well, they may not be interested.
If you’re going after really successful people, many of
those folks are open to new ideas. Additional resource. It’s a
much better way to approach things. On your outgoing voice
message, when somebody calls your office, your message is
“Please leave a message at the tone, and if you’re referred to
us, please let us know whom we need to thank.” If you were
referred to us, please let us know whom we need to thank.
Or, please let us know whom we need to thank for recommending you to us. What are we doing? We’re getting that
message out there to everybody. It’s about building a culture
of referrals and introductions. Now everybody that gets your
voice mail knows that you work from referrals. You celebrate
it. You say thank you. It happens all the time if it’s on your
voicemail message, right?
Brandon is saying that he learned this when I spoke at
MDRT a few years ago. You use it, and it works, and it
creates conversation, and other advisors like it, and they use
it. It just stirs. This won’t necessarily create a referral in and
of itself, but it’s part of the mix. It’s part of the culture that
you’re engaging in here. That’s what you want to do. On your
signature file, kind of a similar type of dynamic, or a P.S.
Don’t keep this a secret or never be too busy to be a resource
or take on new clients by referrals. You’ve heard this one: The
greatest compliment clients can give to me is an introduction
to someone else they care about. That could be on your
P.S. Rotate these over time so you’re not sending out the
same message to everybody. So, let’s not confuse promoting
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referrals with asking for referrals. We’re talking today about
being super referable, creating incredible engagement. We’re
talking about being appropriately proactive and ways to be
proactive without really asking.
I have a question for you. Is knowledge power? Yes? I
respectfully disagree. I think it’s important, don’t get me
wrong. I’m kind of in the knowledge business. It’s worthless
unless you use it. Unless you take action, right? Ideas don’t
create results. Taking action creates results.
So, in summary. Who gives referrals? Engaged clients.
Engaged with our value, engaged with us. Everything we
do from now on, when we call them on the phone, when
we get together, it’s all about engaging with them, with our
value, and with whom we are as individuals. Talking about
our personal why, talking about how we’re going to stay in
touch. All the different things we do to create that sense of
engagement with us. Then we are appropriately proactive.
We find ways to nudge that process a little bit by planting
referral seeds. Don’t keep me a secret. Never be too busy to
see if we can be a resource for other people you care about.
I’ll leave you with a quick story.
I got a referral from a guy named Joel Rosenberg. He
referred me to John Hurley. I said to Joel, “How do you
know Mr. Hurley?” He said, “Bill, we’ve been playing tennis
every Friday morning for years. A standing appointment.”
I’m thinking this is a good relationship. I said, “When I call
Mr. Hurley, what kind of reaction, what kind of personality
am I going to get?” This is what Joel said to me. “Bill, John’s
a great guy, but don’t let him intimidate you.” Oh, great. A
thanks-for-nothing referral. “Mr. Hurley, this is Bill Cates.
Joel Rosenberg suggested I give you a call.” “Joel Rosenberg?”
“Yes, sir.” “He gave my name out again?” “Well, I guess he
did.” “I don’t even like Joel.” Now, we can think 400 words
per minute, so I’m thinking really fast, right? He has played
tennis every Friday morning for years. “You know, Mr.
Hurley, quite frankly sir, I don’t think Joel likes you either.
I think that’s why he gave me your name and number, so I
can bug you until you buy something.” He loved it. He said,
“Son, I don’t know who you are or what you’re selling, but
come on over. I like your style.” Now he’s a client.
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