Monologue 1:
Detention
By Felicity Blackstone
Solo speeches for: 13 and under boys
Setting the scene:
Jack, an easy-going lad on the whole, would probably prefer to be out on the football
pitch than in class.
JACK: Guess where I am? In detention with Rajiv beside me. A two hundred word
essay on why I must not eat in class. Two hundred words! I can’t think of anything to
write.
All right, so break is the time for scoffing chocolate bars according to Old-Crow-Face,
Mr Crowley, our French teacher. But what would you do if your tummy was rumbling
in the middle of conjugating the verb to eat? It was the mere mention of the word that
set it off. The notes it was churching out were not dissimilar to the Marseillaise. Most
appropriate, I thought. Anyway, Rajiv started to get the giggles. At this point Mr
Crowley Crow suddenly lost his temper and sent my poor friend out of the class and
told him to make up the work in detention.
Well, to stop any more eruptions from either my stomach or Crow-Face I considered
that the best approach was to secrete my chocolate mallow bar into my mouth in bite
sized portions. I was just enjoying my third portion when he pounced on me to
translate ‘the boy eats the biscuit’ into French. Unfortunately, at this point I choked
on my chocolate bar… (he sighs.)
No lying in tomorrow I suppose …. I’ll have to get up in time for some breakfast.
(starting to write.) I must not eat in class because …
Monologue 2:
Saturday
By Felicity Blackstone
Solo speeches for: 13 and under boys
Setting the scene:
Michael is normally perky, with a lively sense of humour. Now he is down in the
dumps.
MICHAEL: I’m bored. Nothing’s gone right today. If I had known what sort of day it
was going to be I probably wouldn’t even have bothered getting out of bed. The
weather has changed. All week while we have been slaving away at school, the sun
has shone brightly outside. Today is Saturday and it’s raining. I was all ready to play
football in the first elevens against our greatest rivals, the Wanderers. Yes, I had
actually been picked at last for the first eleven. I was going out there to prove that
they should have picked me instead of Jim right at the beginning of the season
instead of waiting until now. But what happens? There’s a phone call first thing this
morning from Bob, our coach, to say he’s very sorry but the pitch is waterlogged and
so the game has been called off. Well you can imagine my feelings.
Right, I thought, this is not going to get me down, I’ll call up my friend Jake and he
can come over and we can play Lemmings on the computer. His mother tells me that
Jake has to meet his aunt who is over from New Zealand.
Then I had the brilliant idea. I would complete my model kit of the harrier. It’s been
sitting in the box half-made for ages. Well, I cleared my desk of all the junk and laid
out all the bits. The harrier was coming along fine. All it needed was the
undercarriage wheels to be put in place. As I prised them off the plastic frame one of
the wheels flew off across the room somewhere in the direction of my bed. I
searched for it everywhere. It was not to be found. Just not my day.
I’m bored.
Monologue 3:
The Princess and The Swineherd
By Priscilla Morris
Solo speeches for: 13 and under girls
Setting the scene:
This popular fairy-tale by Hans Christian Anderson tells the story of a proud princess
who, refusing all her suitors, is married off to a swineherd and learns humility. As in
all good fairy tales, the swineherd turns out to be a prince who truly loves her.
PRINCESS: Oh, you stupid, stupid thing! That is the third time you have missed your
throw. What did you say? Of course it was straight; Princesses always throw straight,
don’t they? Now don’t stand chattering; begin again, and remember, after this, the
first who misses shan’t play anymore.
The Princess misses.
(Angrily.) there! That was your fault; you can’t throw straight, either of you. It’s a silly
game anyway so go away and leave me alone!
The Emperor enters.
Good day father. I suppose it’s nearly time for me to meet another of your boring
Princes. Why do you keep inviting them? They are none of them good enough. The
last one had too big a nose and couldn’t speak without gobbling like a turkey. His
Kingdom was such a little one and his palace wasn’t a palace at all, only a plain,
ordinary castle with not more than a hundred servants in it. Besides I don’t want to
get married, so you can tell this new Prince to go away for I won’t see him!
What did you say? Has he brought me a present? Oh I do hope it’s a little cat! I’ve
always wanted one. Open it! Open it quickly!
The Emperor opens the present.
Why, it’s nothing but an ordinary flower – what a common thing! You can take it
away again. Tell the Prince I won’t marry him, so he needn’t bother to wait. Now go,
father, and leave me alone – I am tired of silly presents and Princes!
Monologue 4:
The Broken Ankle
By Felicity Blackstone
Solo speeches for: 13 and under girls
Setting the scene:
Emma is a bright girl, full of energy and determination. Her friends have run on
ahead of her.
EMMA: (Shouts) Hey, you two, wait for me!
They have not listened to her.
It’s not fair! Just because I’m the youngest and smallest, they never want me in their
games – well, I’m going to catch up with them. I know where they’ve gone. (Starting
to run.) Wait for me!
She trips and falls.
Ow! Oh no! that’s done it, my new jeans have got a rip in them. I only got them last
weekend – how annoying, Mum will be furious. (Trying to get up.) Ouch, my ankle; it
really hurts. What have I done to it? I can’t walk on it. Oh bother, I’d better sit down
again. Let’s have a look at it. (Pulling up her trouser leg.) It’s not bleeding or anything
but it looks swollen. (Prodding it.) Ooh, that hurts! What shall I do? Perhaps I can try
hopping along on the other leg.
She struggles to her feet and tries – but it is no good.
I’m never going to get back home like this. Maybe I can try crawling on my good leg
and dragging my other leg. (She tries.) that’s no good, it’s far too painful. I wonder if
I’ve broken my ankle. That will mean a visit to casualty, x-rays and plaster casts.
(Brightening.) I’ve always wondered what it would be like to have my leg in plaster.
I’ll make sure that everyone makes a fuss of me. James will have to carry my school
bag and Helen will have to help me up and down the stairs. I really hate the way they
leave me all the time – this will teach them …
She starts to cry.
……I can hear them calling my name. (Shouting.) I’m over here – I’m so pleased to
see you. Thank goodness you’ve come.
Monologue 5:
Too Late
By Jenny Thornton
Solo speeches for: 13 and over girls
Setting the scene:
In this scene a teenage girl reflects on her life. The stage represents two time zones
– this year (stage left) and last year (stage right).
(Standing in the middle of the stage.)
Here I bridge the gap – span two time zones. Life was so different then. How could I
possibly know? How?
(Mimes watching television)
Mum! Mum! Bring my cup of tea up will you. Oh go on – please! No I can’t be
bothered to come downstairs. (Taking the tea.) Thanks. Oh and by the way, I’m not
going to the disco, they apparently make a fuss if you don’t dance and I’m too tired to
dance so I shan’t bother. Maybe I’ll go to the one next month – yes – next month.
(Freeze – moves to a towel.)
What a hot day. I’ll just sunbathe for a few hours. Paddle! Why on earth would I
want to paddle? No thanks I’m staying on my towel – safe – no salty water or sand
between my toes.
(Freeze – moves to a flower.)
He loves me – he loves me not – he loves me – he loves me not. What a bore. Why
do we have to come on these family picnics I’ll never know. And walking – who
wants to walk up and down hills? All that grass gives me hay fever.
(Freeze – moves to centre stage.)
Hay fever. I worried about hay fever. That was the last day of normal life. We left the
park and went home. Mum cooked the dinner but had forgotten the peas. I popped
down the shops. Day dreaming – I was day dreaming about Vanessa’s party and
what I was going to wear – stepped out – didn’t see the car coming – just stepped
out – right in its path – head on!
CRASH ! BASH! SMASH!
(Freeze – movies to stage left and is very still.)
This room is my life now, Mum brings me my cup of tea – I can’t go downstairs –
can’t walk. Can’t walk in the fields or feel the grass under my feet. I won’t be able to
paddle or get sand in between my toes. Not now! Not ever! ….. and the disco – I
never did make the disco – never did dance. Now I won’t get the chance. Will I?
TOO LATE !
Monologue 6:
Heidi
By Johanna Spyri (adapted by Shaun McKenna)
The novel is published by Penguin Books
Solo speeches for: 13 and over girls
Setting the scene:
Heidi is a young orphan girl who lives in a tiny village in the Swiss Alps with her
grandfather. Detie is Heidi’s young aunt, her mother’s sister, who works in a nearby
town. Detie has come back to Heidi’s village with a plan she believes will help Heidi.
She is talking to Heidi’s grandfather.
DETIE: How well Heidi looks, I hardly recognised her. You’ve certainly looked after
her all right. Of course, I always intended to come back for her because I know she
must be in your way but two years ago, when you took her in, I just didn’t know what
else to do with her. I’ve been on the lookout for a good home for her ever since, and
that’s why I’m here now. I’ve heard of a wonderful chance for her. I’ve checked
everything thoroughly and everything is good. It’s the chance of a lifetime. The family
I work for have some very rich relations who live in one of the best houses in
Frankfurt. They have a little girl who’s been paralysed on one side and is very
delicate. She has to be in a wheelchair all the time and have lessons with a tutor.
That’s awfully dull for her and she wants a playmate. My people have been talking
about it ever such a lot because, of course, they want to help the poor little girl.
That’s how I heard what they wanted – a simple, unspoilt child to go and stay with
her, someone a bit out of the ordinary. Of course, I thought of Heidi at once and I
went to see the housekeeper. I told her all about Heidi and she said she thought
Heidi sounded perfect. Isn’t that wonderful. Isn’t Heidi a lucky girl. If they like her,
and if anything were to happen to the invalid, God forbid, but it’s quite possible …
indeed, it’s quite likely, they might even …. You know. What? Why are you looking
at me like that?
(GRANDFATHER: Tell them we’re not interested.)
Not interested? Not interested, indeed! Anyone else would jump at such an
opportunity. She’s my sister’s child and I’m responsible for her welfare. This is a
wonderful opportunity for Heidi and I won’t let her miss out on it. I simply won’t. If you
don’t agree, if you don’t, I’ll …. Well, I’ll take you to court. Heidi is going to Frankfurt
whether you like it or not.
Monologue 7:
Old King Cole
By Ken Campbell
Published by Oberon Books
Solo speeches for: 13 and over boys
Setting the scene:
This play follows the adventures of the amazing Faz, an inventor-cum-magician and
his feeble-minded assistant Twoo. Here, we find Baron Wadd and Cyril the Fiddler
fighting over Princess Daphne’s hand in marriage. The event is reported to the
crowd by the MASTER OF CEREMONIES or sports commentator.
MC: My Lords, Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to Wembley Sports Stadium for
another afternoon of assorted sport. We have an especially exciting contest here for
you today. A Special Nine Round Royal Challenge Match between Baron Wadd and
Cyril the Fiddler. In the snazzy, bri-nylon track suit – Cyril the Fiddler! And in the
brown, egg-stained dressing-gown – Baron Wadd! …
A one round contest. One knockout of a count of ten to decide the winner. Seconds
out.
[GONG: Bong!]
(Commentating.) … And the Baron is on the floor right away …. He’s trying to heave
himself up …. But some unseen, invisible force seems to be holding his glove to the
floor … Meanwhile Cyril satisfies himself with a left then a right, then a beautiful left
hook there to the Baron’s hindquarters ... The Baron now straining to get up … he
makes an almighty effort …. and yes, he’s now on his feet. … but he’s staggering
about, his muscles, which have been described as being like baby sparrow’s kneecaps, seemingly quite out of control … he’s fallen now into the arms of the Track
Officials …. The Track Officials swing him back into the fray …. One of the Baron’s
swinging gloves strikes Cyril a blow! … Cyril falls!!! What an extraordinary turn of
events. (He leaps into the ring to count Cyril out.) One. Two. Three. (Cyril gets
up.) But Cyril is on his feet again after a count of three. The crowd here at Wembley
going mad with excitement … Cyril, all time Olympic Champion, knocked down for a
count of three, by Baron Wadd, who experts claim is in fact the weediest man in the
entire world … but the effort of the blow seems to have sapped the remainder of the
Baron’s almost non-existent strength … the Baron looking very groggy as Cyril
moves in … a vicious left, by Cyril … a right to the body … a left to the jaw … the
Baron falls against Cyril … Cyril appearing to hold the Baron up in a clinch … the
Baron coming in for an immense amount of punishment from this great figure of the
fighting world, Cyril the Fiddler …