Surviving the Higher Language Paper
The basics
OK, so first of all, let’s make sure that you understand what the exam looks like. To start, it is split into two
parts: Section A, the reading questions, and Section B, the writing questions. These sections both have the
same amount of marks, which total to 80 (40 in Section A, 40 in Section B).
You have two hours and fifteen minutes to complete this exam. We recommend that you spend 15
minutes reading the reading questions and then reading the three texts for Section A. These are in the
booklet titled Insert on your desk. Then, spend one hour on the Section A questions and one hour on the
Section B questions. Timings are always a rough guide, but to ensure you give yourself enough time to
answer the bigger questions at the end of each Section, we recommend splitting up your time as follows:

Question 1 (8 marks) - 12 minutes

Question 2 (8 marks) - 12 minutes

Question 3 (8 marks) - 12 minutes

Question 4 (16 marks) - 24 minutes

Question 5 (16 marks) - 24 minutes

Question 6 (24 marks) - 36 minutes
Section A
Section B
General Top Tips
Before we get into the nitty-gritty of the exam and looking at each question in detail, here are some
general tips that will help you be a success.

In Section A, read the question first then read the text, highlighting relevant information as you go.

Read with a pencil and underline as you go. You may even want to add small annotations to your
underlined information to remind yourself of your inferences.

Make sure you explain your quotations—this is what will get you the marks. Plus, make sure your
explanations are specific; if they can be applied to any text, they are too general.

Make it clear which source you are talking about in Question 4 - the examiner needs to know you
understand what you are talking about.

Plan what you are going to say in the writing questions. This will make your ideas clear, structured
and logical.

Read through your writing to check for any silly mistakes. Capital letters, full stops, commas, other
punctuation, spellings, missing letters, etc.
If you have any questions about the exam and what it entails, ask your teacher. They will be able to put
you right in about a second and it will stop you stressing. Whatever you do, DO NOT SUFFER IN SILENCE!
Question 1 (8 marks, 12minutes)
Unpicking the words of the question
The question is worded like this:
What do you understand…
Things you need to be aware of:

You have to do more than pick out the facts, you are being asked to infer.

You need to explain in detail using your own words.

You need to use quotations in your answer to support your idea.
The Main Aim
This question acts as a warm up for Question 2 - it is basically the exact same skill, just on Source 1 rather
than Source 2 – the added bonus is that you are asked to write a shorter answer. Let’s have a look at Band
3 and Band 4 success criteria.
The difference here is if you can be “clear” - so show you understand the text - or “perceptive”; being able
to understand the importance of certain details and make links between different pieces of information.
Bullet point 1: Track through the text methodically, making inferences about the things you have picked
out along the way. If there are any different or conflicting opinions, make sure you show you understand
how the text develops.
Bullet point 2: When it talks about engagement, it means you are talking about and interpreting the focus
of the text and you are able to show you understand what the writer is saying about it.
Bullet point 3: Here, connections are what will get you the higher marks. Whereas for Band 3, you can
show how different pieces of information link, for Band 4, explore the impact of this link on the issue in the
text.
Bullet point 4: You need to be using quotations, but keep them short. Here, the difference is between
“relevant” and “appropriate”. For Band 3, your quotes need to fit what you’re saying. For Band 4, your
quotes need to fit into your analysis and use only the bits you need.
Question 1 (8 marks, 12minutes) Continued
The key word in the Question (task1)
After the “What do you understand…” part of the question, there comes the key word (ooooh…). This is what they
are asking you to understand in your answer. Here are a few examples, underline the key words like a pro. Tip: the
key word may be more than one word…
A) What do you understand from the article about the issues of child
labour?
B) What do you understand from the article about the issues of children and
starting school?
C) From the article, what can you understand about the issues the writer has
with Facebook?
Exemplar Answers (task 2)
Below is part of a top Band 3 response and part of a top Band 4 response. How are they different?
(B3 6/8) Next; we learn about all of the hard jobs that these children have to do. Not only are they out of
school, but they are doing work no child in the UK could even dream of at such a young age. ‘Digging shafts’
and working in ‘brick kilns’ is not what a typical child should be spending their time doing. It suggests that
these children are being robbed of their childhood. We are told that multinational companies everyone buys
from are also guilty of this, such as: Apple, Samsung and Google.
(B4 8/8) The article also informs the reader that ‘about 190 million child labourers’ will be present in eight
years’ time. This suggests how it is a growing issue that is recognised by Gordon Brown as the ‘new slavery’;
this emphasises to the reader how a society, which seems to be increasingly successful due to companies
‘such as Apple, Samsung and Google’ has remained in the era of slavery, yet as the minority, for example: black
people have stood up for their rights and we have become more acceptant of them, society has searched for a
new victim.
What do you understand about the issues the settlers will face when arriving on Mars?
What will the first few days on Mars be like?
The new settlers’ first priority will be putting in place the basic essentials for survival and ensuring that backup
systems are fully functioning. They’ll have a lot on their minds. They’ll need to ensure that all oxygen production
and recycling equipment is working, and if they’re topping up their oxygen from water gathered from the
atmosphere (by breaking it down using electrolysis), they’ll need to check that the extractor fans collecting
atmospheric water are up and running. In the first weeks, the colonists’ food will not be home-grown. They’ll be
eating dried and preserved rations in boxes. However, they may spend the first two weeks setting up a simple
greenhouse so they can begin to grow food as soon as possible.
A crucial matter for survival is energy. Whether they’re using nuclear or solar energy, they’ll need to set up
the apparatus, link it to the base and make sure that the power supply is stable and reliable. They may also set up
chemical apparatus to make useful things like fuel. Carbon dioxide in the atmosphere, for instance, can be reacted
over a catalyst with hydrogen (itself released from water gathered from permafrost or the atmosphere) to make
methane fuel to power their robotic rover.
The Sun produces infrequent, but intense, particle streams that can cause severe radiation damage. So the
settlers will need to ensure that radiation shielding is in place—a layer of Martian rock or water in the walls of their
habitat would do the job—and that they have a more resistant shelter to escape to during periods of intense
radiation.
Most of these procedures will have been tested before they land, so in principle it should just be a matter of
plugging in the equipment. But they will still need to check and cross-check all of these systems In a potentially
lethal environment. The first few days will be a Lego-like frenzy of putting together the first Martian base.
Question 2 (8 marks, 12minutes)
Unpicking the words of the question
The question is worded like this:
Explain how the headline and picture are effective
and how they link to the text.
Things to be aware of:
Don’t be this guy!

Analysis of the headline and picture have equal weighting, so you have to talk
about both and you have to analyse their effect (PQE)

It is asking you to link to the text, not doing so will limit the amount of marks you can earn.
The Main Aim
Here, the examiner is asking you to show your understanding of the relationship between headline and
text and picture and text. DO NOT LINK THE HEADLINE WITH THE PICTURE, THIS IS NOT WHAT THE
QUESTION IS ASKING. Instead, you have to show how the headline or picture creates a specific effect on
the reader and then how does it relate to something in the text and why that is important. Let’s look at
the success criteria.
Bullet point one : The difference between Band 3 and 4 here is ‘interpretation,’ so basically, if you’ve
made an inference, why do you think that? Give your reasoning.
Bullet point two: This is the same for bullet point one. You need to show that you are thinking about why
the picture has that specific effect.
Bullet point three: With Band 3, you are being asked to choose an appropriate link to the text, whereas
with Band 4, you are being asked to explain why is the link important.
Bullet point four: When it says quotations, it means quoting the text or the headline. When it says
references, it means elements of the picture that you describe as evidence. Be specific when describing
evidence from the picture; it will show you understand the effect of the picture more clearly.
Have a go at this real exam question:
Explain how the headline and picture are effective and how they link
to the text.
Question 2 (8 marks, 12minutes) Continued
Exemplar Answers
Look at the difference between these different answers and the comments. How could you improve your own
answers from the task on the previous page?
Band 1 (2/8)
“Admit it.” From reading just the words “admit it” makes us want to read on. “take a stroll through your
favourite mall and have a look at the shelves.” We can all admit but don’t want to, so from a bit of the article
and headline, it’s already changing our feelings and emotions.
Simple, generalised comment on the headline, no specific linking to the text, although there is some attempt to
make links. Candidate does not explain what we are admitting, so it limits his/her ability to show understanding.
Band 2 (4/8)
The image used in the article is also effective as it shows a young boy working in a factory. This makes it
effective as it gives the reader an idea about what is going to be said in the text. In the text it says, “see the
children stitching the fine embroidery and beading?” This links to the image as in the image it shows a child
stitching clothes.
There is some linking between the image and the text, but does not expand on why this is important. The picture is
described briefly, therefore making the analysis harder for the candidate to achieve. Candidate does not expand on
the effect of the image and text, only that it gives the reader an idea.
Band 3 (5/8)
Furthermore, the picture also uses a medium shot. This is used to show the reader what the conditions look
like, with old machinery, dark and poorly lit rooms and also piles of clothes that have been made by the boy.
This makes the reader again think about what the workers are forced to do for little or no money. This links
to the text as it says “16 hour days and no days off all month”
There are clear effects in this answer, where the candidate starts to explain the significance of the picture. The link
to the text is also relevant and clear.
Band 3 (6/8)
Furthermore, the image shows a young child almost crying out for help which is shown through his facial
expression. It is effective because it makes the reader sad and want to help. This links to the text where it says
“16 hour days and no days off all month” this suggests that the conditions and the long hours are unfair. It is
seen as slavery as they have to work in unpleasant and unsatisfactory times with harsh conditions. Also it
shows that they are treated worse than people think.
There is a clear effect explained and it is linked with relevant information from the text. The major difference here is
that the candidate has explained the link clearly too, even if it is a little repetitive at the end.
Band 4 (7/8)
The picture helps encapsulate the true nature of conditions that workers are forced to tolerate; a young boy is
shown near a sewing machine and is covered in his own sweat, this emphasises the extent to which children
are worked, and the dark colours reflect the dark, immoral truth of sweatshops in less economically
developed countries. This links to the text as it is said that children are “stitching fine embroidery and
beading.” This makes it evident that children are being exploited and there is little to no regard for their
wellbeing.
Not only does this answer sound sophisticated, it explores an interpretation of the picture that is perceptive. Going
beyond the obvious is what Band 4 is looking for.
Question 3 (8 marks, 12 minutes)

Unpicking the words of the question
Explain some of the thoughts and feelings the writer
has about…
Things to be aware of:

You are looking at the writer’s voice

You are analysing using PQE

It is very like looking at a character from a novel
Always write in
Standard English folks!
The Main Aim
Here, you need to show that you can pick up on what the reader feels. To do this, you need to use PQE.
This is different to PQI, as with PQI you are saying something about the text then interpreting it. PQE is
about saying something about the text then explaining what it tells us about how the writer feels. Slightly
different you see.
Bullet point 1: This skill is asking you to demonstrate you understand how the writer is feeling, and you
understand any changes in thoughts or feelings through the text. Band 4 will require you to show you
understand each shift in opinion.
Bullet point 2: So this is thinking about the reasons behind the thoughts. Why have they added this
information? Why is it significant? What does it tell us about the thing they are talking about? What
deeper meanings or implications does this thought or feeling have?
Bullet point 3: This, of course, is the easiest bit. The difference between having relevant quotations and
appropriate quotations is how you use them. Someone who uses relevant quotations will choose
evidence that fits their point, but someone who uses appropriate quotations fits them seamlessly into
their answer and they are there to support the explanation, rather than plonked into the writing. If I read
the answer out to you, you shouldn’t be able to tell where the quotations are.
Have a look at the exemplar answers on the next page.
Exemplar Answers
Read the explanations at the bottom, they should help you understand the difference between each of
the grades.
Band 2 (3/8)
The writer thinks that the “amazingly wealthy minority” in India are irresponsible and need to use
some of their wealth to repair the countries welfare so it can be approved substantially.
Some incorrect use of words here hamper the meaning and understanding. The candidate attempts to engage with the text, though lacks explanation.
Band 3 (5/8)
At the start of the article the writer feels quite sad and upset by the sights she is seeing. This could be
because she has not experienced anything like this before and she gets quite “overwhelmed”. Then
towards the middle of the article Mustoe starts to believe that things are gradually getting better
when she’s the people who can handle their way of living better and “move into shantytowns”.
However then she is suddenly hit with shock again as she feels that even though these conditions are
slightly better people should not be living like this. At the end of the beginning paragraph relief starts
to sweep across her as “people were on their way up in the world” and she feels happy as now things
are “neat and clean.”
This answer tracks through the text and shows clear understanding of the writer’s thoughts and feelings.
What is lacks, however, is the interpretation and explanation of these events.
Band 3 (6/8)
Further down, we see the writer feel a sort of resentment and anger at the government for allowing
the country to crumble. She says that when in India “you have to switch off from the poverty and
squalor, because there’s nothing you can do about it.” This infers that, though she is angry and upset
by the lack of justice, she is realistic enough to know that it’s not in her hands to do anything.
This answer starts to make more inferences about why she thinks and feels the things she does. This shows
a deeper understanding of the text and the writer.
Band 4 (7/8)
She turned away from the “poverty” as she thought it would make her lose “sanity” a there is nothing
she can do about it, they must control “population growth” themselves. She “averted” her eyes from
the “beggars” as a “self-protection” because she empathised with the people, but knows there is
nothing she can do about it, wanting to protect herself from this feeling of helplessness.
She felt “at home” at “Apollo Bunder” as the environment was very “Mediterranean” and she
feels much more comfortable in that kind of environment. She describes the evening as “cool”,
suggesting that she feels much more calm in this atmosphere, unlike the “difference in the air” she
had previously felt. She experienced more “enjoyment” at the end of the passage as she had “fish and
chips” reinforcing the idea of her feeling “at home” as this is the type of meal she would be receiving
if she was at home, whereas in India, she only have “curry” so thinks this meal is a “gastronomic
delight” when compared. The word “gastronomic” highlights her feelings of happiness as it
emphasises the “delight” that she feels having “fish and chips.”
This answer makes comparisons between different thoughts and feelings in the text, engages with the text
in detail and is at times perceptive (feeling of helplessness). It explains throughout.
Explain some of the thoughts and feelings Michael Caine has about
places where he lived during the war.
(TOP TIP: I find it is really useful to underline the relevant information from the text and write a mini
explanation (usually 1-2 words) to help me in writing my answer).
Question 4 (16 marks, 24 minutes)
Unpicking the words of the question
The question is worded like this:
Now you need to refer to Source 3 and either Source 1 or Source 2. You
are going to compare two texts, one of which you have chosen.
Compare the ways in which language is used for effect in the two texts.
Give some examples and analyse the effects.
Things you need to be aware of:

You are comparing two texts, one that you choose yourself.

There is plenty to say for both Source 1 and Source 2, there is no advantage to choosing one or the
other. Instead, pick the one you understood the most from the other
questions.

You have to talk about the language, so the words and their effects.

You need to find some similarities and differences between texts.

You should be aiming for about 6-8 points.
Ok, so it’s nothing to do with the exam, but it’s a baby panda!
The Main Aim
You need to be showing the examiner that you can look find language
techniques, analyse language techniques and talk about their importance in terms of the impact of a text.
THEN you need to be able to compare the two texts for how they use language in different contexts. For
example, one text might use adjectives to build up the negative picture of a place whereas another may
use adjectives to show the scale of a problem.
Bullet point 1: You need to show you understand how—and why— a writer has used language for effect.
Bullet point 2: You need to show you understand how the text type and reason for writing can affect how
a writer uses language.
Bullet point 3: It’s that quotations thing again, you gotta use them.
Bullet point 4: You need to find some similarities and differences between the texts.
UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES TALK ABOUT: SENTENCES, PARAGRAPHS, PUNCTUATION, CONTENT.
THESE ARE NOT LANGUAGE AND THEREFORE WILL NOT GET YOU MARKS!
Question 4 (16 marks, 24 minutes) Continued
Below is a table full of the most common language features used by writers. Fill in the definition box and
code box (this is for when you are reading the text for the first time, so you can underline features with
your pencil and write a shortened version of the feature next to it, eg. Simile could become sim). If you’re
not sure of a few, use a dictionary, internet or your teacher to help you out. Note that this is also not an
exhaustive list; there are other techniques and you would do well to add to this table yourself.
Feature
Code
Definition
Common usage
Nouns
To show contrasts or to show the
amount or variety
Adjectives
Add colour and may link to the specific
topic or idea
Verbs
To show the action or way something is
done
Lists
Showing the amount of something, the
abundance
Similes
To create specific images - what is the
comparison saying about the thing?
Metaphors
To create specific images - what is the
comparison saying about the thing?
Personification
To create specific images - why is this
description important for that thing?
Alliteration
To emphasise information, is it a soft or
harsh sound? Importance?
Onomatopoeia
Develops atmosphere, loud or soft?
What does it make you think of?
Rule of three
To show how impressive or abundant
something is
Rhetorical question
To cause the reader to think or question
or consider
Direct address
Creates a direct link to the reader,
makes them feel important, involved
Personal Pronouns
Creates a bond with a group of people
or isolates a group of people
Superlative
Exaggerates to show it is unrivalled
You may also want to check for topic-specific words too and why they are important. The rule of thumb
is:

to pick something that strikes you as interesting

say what the technique it is

Why is this word important and what does it suggest?

What is the intended impact of using this word?

How is this making a point about the thing it is talking about?
Question 4 (16 marks, 24 minutes) Continued: Troubleshooting
Understandably, this is the question that candidates find the hardest. This is because it is the longest and
language analysis can be difficult to get right. Never fear though! This page is all about giving you strategies
to help.
Planning for this Question
A lot of people write off planning as a waste of time. This is not a good idea. Planning organises your brain,
gives you chance to structure your answer logically and allows you to consider the elements that will make
your answer kickass.
1.
draw a quick version of the table below. (5 seconds)
2.
Put number of source above each column. (2 seconds)
3.
Write down specific presentational features you are going to talk about - just the technique, you can
expand on what you want to say when you start writing. Aim for 4, one in each box. (1 minute)
4.
To show which techniques are similar to each other and which are different, add a plus or a minus
sign next to each of the rows. (5 seconds)
5.
Start writing your proper answer!
Source
Source
Eg. Adjectives place
Eg. Adjectives problem -
Plus connectives: similarly, in the same way,
this is similar to, also, likewise, equally
Minus connectives: However, in contrast, in a
different way, conversely, on the other hand
Can’t find any techniques? That’s ok. Pick out things you think are significant or interesting to you.
Struggling to find loads of comparisons? Compare only when it’s a clear comparison. This bullet point is
the least important on the mark scheme, so aim for around 2-3 minimum. Remember, a contrast is ok too.
Struggling where to start? Always start at the top of the text.
Finding it hard to locate examples in one of your texts? You are always going to find one text easier to talk
about, that’s ok.
Get yourself warmed up: what comparisons can you see between the pictures?
These are both David Cameron by the way. He’s the Prime Minister.
Exemplar Answers
Band 3 (10/16)
In Source 3, emotive language is used to make the reader feel apologetic for those who are suffering ‘the starving
millions’ emphasises the sheer number of people suffering . ‘Starving’ is used to make clear to the reader that these
people aren’t hungry but ‘starving’, they are in great poverty and life is very hard for them. This also creates vivid
imagery.
Similarly, in Source 2, emotive language is used. Their conditions in the factory are horrible, they are ‘brutal.’ As a
reader this makes us understand that these factories aren’t ordinary, they are just places where people get hurt. The use
of the word ‘brutal’ signifies to what extent these people suffer and that it is inhumane to make them work in such
conditions.
This candidate shows their understanding of language use and explores effect. They use a clear PQE(Be) style that allows them
to zoom in on particular words. They make a clear comparison, using the word ‘similarly’ (it’s that easy folks!)
Band 4 (13/16)
In source 2, Chamberlain uses language from the semantic field of sight to reflect how the Western World is only just
beginning to open its eyes to the problems of slave labour. This could also suggest that we have been sleepwalking in a
‘shiny, pretty’ world where we all have decent standards of living and the reality of ‘child slave labour’ is unbeknownst to
us. This is reflected in Chamberlain’s sarcastic description of people like us taking a ‘stroll’ through these shanty towns.
The verb ‘stroll’ highlights the luxury and complacency he believes have made us turn a ‘blind eye’ to the problems others
face.
Similarly, in Source 3, Mustoe adopts expressions of incredulity at the ‘utter destitution’ she is experiencing
around her. The ‘starving millions of India’ are the first thing she mentions in the extract, reflecting the sense of scale of
the poverty. This is supported by her use of the simile that Bombay ‘draws the poor like a magnet’. The use of the verb
‘draws’ here suggests people are being forced into poverty against their will, as they merely follow the crowd and copy
what everyone else is doing.
This answer just bumps into Band 4. A lot of this is Band 3 quality, but what makes it pip the post is the fact it is perceptive at
the end of the first paragraph and makes links between different bits of information from the text in the second.
Band 4 (14/16)
Furthermore, Source 1 and 3 use emotive language to make the reader feel sympathy and guilt. Source 1 states that
‘children as young as six are digging shafts and scuttling around.’ The reader can depict from this that the work the
children have to do isn’t nice or easy. The verb ‘scuttling’ compares the child labourers to rodents or rats. This implies
that they are treated with neglect - as insignificant as vermin. Empathy is evoked in the reader because children are being
treated awfully around the world. Guilt is also created as the reader will be regretting buying cheap clothes that may have
been made by children. The verb ‘digging’ is one we would associate with children digging holes or digging for treasure.
The fact that these children are ‘digging shafts’ shows how fast they have been forced to grow up. Source 3 uses the
emotive language of ‘filthy, bedraggled, starvelings without hope.’ The reader would immediately feel empathy for the
poor as they are forced to live ‘without hope’. ‘Hope’ has connotations of light and happiness and the dark, dirty,
dangerous city juxtaposes these ideas. Again, guilt is developed as the reader considers how they live compared to how
other people in the world live.
This answer gets a secure Band 4 because its language analysis is very detailed and at times perceptive, it integrates its
comparisons and makes links between different parts of the text.
WHAT NOT TO DO:
Both articles demonstrate expressions of astonishment from the authors about poverty and ’destitution’ in some of the
world’s poorest countries. This is reflected in their descriptions of ‘revelations’ that have been revealed to them.
This snippet is what not to do. Why? Because it is analysing the content of the text rather than the language. This response
would be at home in Question 1, because the candidate is demonstrating that they understand what the text is saying, not what
effect the language choices make on them as a reader. It’s a subtle difference, but make sure you are answering the question
clearly and correctly.
Now you need to refer to Source 3 and either Source 1 or Source 2. You
are going to compare two texts, one of which you have chosen.
Compare the ways in which language is used for effect in the two texts.
Give some examples and analyse the effects.
Question 5 (16 marks, 24 minutes)
Unpicking the words of the question
The questions for the writing tasks are a bit more fluid. What I mean by this is that they are driven by the format,
language, audience and purpose of the task, which means giving one example of what the main question looks like
is difficult. They do have one helping tip: everything you need to know is included in the wording.
The crux of the question
For the rest of the question, we need to look for the Format, Language, Audience, Purpose.
Format - what is the shape of text you have been asked to write?
Language - is it formal, informal or somewhere in between the two?
Audience - who is it written for? How does that inform what you say and how you say it?
Purpose - what is the reason for you writing?
Have a go at picking out the Format, Language, Audience and Purpose for each of these questions:
A)
Write an entry for your online blog which describes a time when you felt
uncertain or unsure about a situation you were in and explain how you
overcame it.
B)
The travel section of
about their favourite
Write a letter to the
why others would like
C)
A website called The Best and the Worst is asking for contributions.
Write an entry for it which describes the best meal you ever had and the
worst. Explain the reasons for your choice.
your local newspaper is inviting readers to write
place.
editor describing a favourite place and explaining
it.
What do I mean by relaxed style?
Magazine articles and blogs are different to newspaper articles, because they have
what we call a relaxed formal style. This means that they still need to use Standard
English, but they are more informal in their relationship with the reader. They try and
influence our opinions and emotions. Newspaper articles don’t do this, they stick to the
facts and that’s it. Can you work out which is which from the examples below?
The Great British Bake Off contestant Nadiya Jamir Hussain worried she would be dismissed by
viewers as a “Muslim in a headscarf” before the current series was broadcast, but now says the
response to the hit BBC1 cookery programme has shown how tolerant and accepting British society is. One of four semifinalists who will compete on Wednesday’s show for a place in the final, she said she had been anxious about going on the
show.
Great British Bake Off winner Nadiya Hussain has posed for the first time with her family for an exclusive shoot with
HELLO! The 30-year-old’s victory in the BBC series was the most-watched television show of the year. And Nadiya,
who poses for HELLO! with husband Abdal and their children Musa, nine, eight-year-old Dawud and Maryam, five,
said that she is ready for the next chapter of her life – despite nearly quitting the show before she even made her
debut.
The Great British Bake Off has brought us bread lions, dastardly technical challenges and lots of terrified faces, but it's all come
down to this: the 2015 final. Still (just about) standing in the Bake Off tent are Ian Cumming, Nadiya Hussain and Tamal Ray,
but only one of them can triumph. So don your best Mary Berry blazer, stockpile some cake and join us on the sofa from 8pm
as we bring you all the action from the biggest final on telly.
Question 5 (16 marks, 24 minutes) Continued
Using Descriptive Features
It’s time to brush up on your knowledge! Ask your teacher if you’re not sure of an answer. Add some of
your own too - remember, independence is really important when revising.
Paragraphs
Feature
Definition
Example
Adjectives
Verbs
Adverbs
Simile
Metaphor
Extended Metaphor
Opinions
Alliteration
Onomatopoeia
Repetition
Personification
You start a new paragraph every time you change:
Topic - so when you talk about a different point
Time - moving forwards or backwards in time
Place - so, if you’ve gone from talking about Bradford to talking about Leeds, paragraph it
Speaker - I’m sure you remember this from primary school
Important information - If there’s something that you think is really important that should be set apart
from everything else to emphasise its effect, whack it on its own line.
TOP TIP: If you can link the beginning of your written answer and the end of your answer in both Q5
and Q6, then you are ensuring your writing is a top Band 3/ low Band 4. This is straight from the
mouths of the head examiners. DO IT, DO IT, DO IT!
Exemplar Answers
Write an entry for your blog which describes a place that you have visited which has
affected you or stayed in your memory, and explain why this is so.
Band 2 (3/10 content 3/6 SPG)
I was took back when I stayed at this place in Dubai, my assumptions got ahead of me obviously because I just assumed
that it’s Dubai and my hotel will be of star rating and will be very good to stay in because it is also very high class place
yes may be a little expensive but that’s Dubai I have payed for an all inclusive apartment which is used of everything but
not only until we got there, there wasn’t use of anything I only got a single bed room all for the price of £13,000 so I
would like to claim some money back or put me in a different hotel with the same star rating which as a 4 star and I
wasn’t even travelling alone absolutely ridiculous so I am making a informal complaint at the amount of money wasted
on this very expensive journey I wouldn’t recommend the Hotel plaza Dubai to anyone they just mess you around.
This is the entire answer. As you can see, the person starts off focussed on the task, but then wanders off task by making it into
a complaint, which is not what the question is asking. Although they use other punctuation, they use no full stops and no
paragraphs (btw, DON’T DO THIS!!!!!!!!)
Band 2 (4/10 content 4/6 SPG)
As a young child I went to spain to visit my grand parents who had newly just moved there from Manchester. It was
beautiful. The change in the environment was amazing, not just the weather but the people. They were all so nice and
friendly, they sang and danced in the street and even tried to get you to join in. It made me realise that when I grew up I
no longer wanted to remain in Manchester. It made me realise how much I thought Manchester was a rubbish place;
there is so little to do.
Surprisingly, looking back I turned down the offer to live there with my grand parents in fear of not being with my
mother. Although she probably would of let me anyway.
This is the entire answer. There is some successful communication here and the candidate stays on task. We get some sense of
the place, but it is underdeveloped and focusses more on the people. The SPG is generally accurate, although more paragraphs
could have supported their meaning.
Band 3 (6/10 content 4/6 SPG)
In 2014 I visited Normandy on the West Coast of France, the site where the D-Day landings in the World War Two took
place.
The minute I got into Normandy I felt surprisingly at home as there were many winding country roads and farms
like in England. However, when driving to my destination I saw why this place was different and remembered. To the left
of me was a beach with enticing golden sand and in the distance to the right were row on row of graves for fallen
soldiers. This hit me hard as I saw the sacrifice that had been made by the men in World War Two that had allowed me
and others to be there that day.
As I moved further towards my destination I could see the un-natural tarnish of the landscape caused by artillery
fire. Many of the craters had tributes from local residents and tourists like me for the fallen. This just emphasised how
grateful the people are that the soldiers came to liberate them.
When I arrived at my hotel I passed through a beautiful lush green golf course and passed two large swimming
pools. With the sun gleaming down on the water I could never forget the beautiful site. In the distance I could hear the
crashing of waves onto the sandy beach which many had lost their lives fighting on.
One of the most memorable moments of my time in Normandy was every morning at ten, a convoy of Spitfires and
transport aircraft flew over the beach front. The site was amazing and the sand was ferocious but it helps people
remember what happened there and not to ever forget. I could never forget hearing the drones of the engines for the
first time as it made the ground vibrate and the swimming pool ripple.
After visiting Normandy and seeing craters, graves and the equipment used I could never forget the place. Also
after seeing how beautiful and peaceful it is today I could never forget the sights of what happened there.
This is the entire answer. Clear communication of ideas is present throughout the answer, candidate thinks about their
vocabulary and the effect it creates. They have also clearly written for the correct purpose and audience. What sets this one
apart from the higher marked answers is the conscious construction of the writing to engage the reader.
Exemplar Answers Continued
Band 4 (8/10 content 5/6 SPG)
Egypt. An exquisite, enthralling and enjoyable place. The beautiful sandy dunes sloped across the Sahara Desert. The
famous and historical views of the successful Pharos Pharohs Pharoes pyramids and statues as large as buildings in the
Middle-East. The camels hunching over the fountains and springs of delightful water.
Indeed, they are picturesque and memorable images, however no, they are not what I think of, when associated
with Egypt.
In the tight and bedraggled markets, of the city of Cairo, I see an old man with a long, white beard and crystal blue
eyes slumped over shreddings of newspapers, covered with mud and dirt. Wrinkled hands grasping for something. Food.
Water. Hope. Hands cupped towards the sky, in mercy of the ‘Great One’ above him. I turn away. I am only ten years old.
Already, I am embarrassed as to being dragged away with my mother pushing me further into the market stalls.
I look at the red and white stripey cloths, attempting to produce shade for the scorching sun above us. An old man,
with a dark, caramel complexion, as though he has been sitting there for centuries beneath the sun, is tapping at a birdlike metal shape, possibly made of copper or bronze, it gleams in the sunlight and embodies beautiful Arabic calligraphy.
He turns to the stone doorway and calls a young boy to help him stand. As I stare entranced at the coffee pot both men
look back at me and my family inquisitively.
Partial answer. This candidate communicates convincingly and in detail. They engage the reader with structured and developed
writing and ideas. Some ambitious vocabulary, though at times it’s a bit forced. SPG generally accurate. (Notice this candidate
has a few attempts at “Pharaohs”, realises they can’t spell it and chooses an alternative they can spell. Good strategy!
Band 4 (10/10 content 6/6 SPG)
I’ve been to many incredible places, but none so brilliantly memorable as Camden Town.
Now, I know what you’re thinking: this girl’s mad! Everywhere she’s visited and she chooses London? Cold, rainy,
miserable London? And yes, I see where you’re coming from, but have you ever been to Camden? It’s a whole different
world.
Camden isn’t London.
No, it’s its own place.
A few little cramped streets packed away to the North of the capital, a few little streets with more culture and
diversity than I’ve seen anywhere else.
You walk down the high street and see your regular shops—Topshop, Urban Outfitters etc etc—except with
massive objects on the storefront. A massive trainer hanging off the Vans store? Completely normal. But it’s a sign of
interesting things to come… You turn the corner and suddenly you’re immersed in a plethora of smells, spanning the
globe; the scarlet curries, the mustard noodles, the unnaturally loud voice of the man shouting “Bang Bang chicken! Get
your chicken here!” - amazing.
And all of the madness is replaced when you cross the path to the canal. The ethereal level of peace seems unreal
compared to the carnage taking place behind you. But watching the willow leaves drift slowly into the shimmering water
is a moment of peace amongst the mayhem.
You turn around, and you’re back.
Cross the street to the market hall and it’s as if you’ve stepped back in time. The endless stall o 1930s flash
cameras, vintage furniture and 50s dresses is breathtaking. It’s like the most patriotic market I’ve ever seen. Still brilliant
though.
Moving on…
Your senses are overwhelmed yet again as you delve under the bridge into a musty space of grid-locked stalls and carts,
each enveloped in vivid cloths or exquisitely beaded canopies, while the neighbouring shops’ incense smells clash and
invade your nostrils. The atmosphere is one I have never experienced anywhere else, and I doubt I ever will—the
collective sense appreciation for our cultures unites people and they forget their worries. Literally.
Partial answer. Convincing and compelling communication. Sustained crafting, assuredly matched to purpose and audience.
Employs a variety of sentence structures for effect, highly accurate SPG.
Question 5 and Question 6
The Mark Scheme
The only thing that changes between Question 5 and Question 6 in the mark scheme is how many marks you get
for each Band. So for Band 3, you would be awarded between 13-16 marks for Question 6. Let’s unpick these skills.
Bullet point 1: Your writing needs to make sense and be believable, that you’re writing it for real, not pretend.
Bullet point 2: Format, Language, Audience and Purpose need to be 100% correct.
Bullet point 3: You need to write about your topic in detail and it needs to be interesting to read.
Bullet point 4: You need to think about your tone and the way you want your audience to receive your information.
Different topics will require different levels of seriousness and you have to pitch it right.
Bullet point 5: ‘Linguistic devices’ is a posh way of saying descriptive writing features for Question 5 and persuasive
writing features in Question 6. You need to use a range throughout your writing and for effect.
Bullet point 6: In a nutshell, use exciting words.
Bullet point 7: If you are not using paragraphs, then you will seriously jeopardise your grade.
Make sure you are planning in your paragraphs and where they go before writing.
Bullet point 8: Use simple, compound and complex sentences. Not sure what these are? Look
them up. Try using short sentences for effect at times too, this will look good in your writing.
That is a lot of things that you need to be doing at once, isn’t it? Don’t worry,
examiners say that they are not looking for you to be doing all of those things all the time, but to
treat it as a best fit list. What they are looking for is that you’ve understood the question,
Listen to Nadiya! Don’t put
you’ve written something to fit the question, it’s interesting and it’s well structured.
boundaries on yourself!
Question 5 and 6 Continued
More Mark Scheme
Writing is asking you to show two types of technical skill: you need to show you can adapt to a text type
and use appropriate writing features to create good content, and you need to show that your technical
accuracy in spelling, punctuation and grammar is sound. This is the mark scheme for the SPG element of
the writing section. Again, it is the same for Question 5 and Question 6, however for Band 2 you will be
awarded 4-6 marks and for Band 3 7-8 marks for Question 6.
Look at the difference between the words. Whereas Band 2 uses words such as “control, mainly,
increasingly developed, usually,” Band 3 is all about the “complex, accurately, ambitious and
consistently”. Therefore, learning how to use sentences, spellings, grammar and standard English is really
important.
Planning
We’ve already gone over the importance of planning, but for Section B, it is wise to do it in a slightly
different way.
1.
Make a mind map or start a list with the key purpose in the middle of the map or as a heading for
your list. (10 seconds)
2.
Write down as many ideas that relate to the topic as you can think of. (1 minute)
3.
Read through your ideas and pick the best 4-5. Number them 1-5, with your best point as number 1
down to 5. This is your structure for your paragraphs. (15 seconds)
4.
Next to the points you have numbered, write the techniques you will use in that paragraph. Aim for
2-3 per paragraph. So, it might be I will write sim, pers, adjs next to my number one to mean I’m
going to use a simile, personification and really great adjectives in that paragraph. (1 minute)
Have a go at planning some of the example questions you picked apart for the Format, Language,
Audience and Purpose task.
Question 6 (24 marks, 36 minutes)
Unpicking the words of the question
Question 6, as Question 5, has a more fluid question structure, but essentially it is the same. Again, it
gives you everything you need to know in the question for Format, Language, Audience and Purpose.
Have a go at working out the FLAP for these questions.
A)
A recent report states: ‘Homelessness in the UK is a crisis that is
destroying the lives of people, especially young people.’
Write an article for your school or college newspaper persuading
young people to support charities which help the homeless.
B)
There is evidence that many young people are not eating, exercising
or spending their leisure time properly and that is damaging their
health and life chances.
Write an article for Living Today magazine which persuades young
people to improve their diet and lifestyle.
C)
It has been said that: ‘People who save lives or help improve the
lives of others are the true role models of today.’
Write an article for a newspaper in which you argue your view about
what makes a good role model.
Just a Quick Word on Proof Reading
In exams we tend to write quicker than we do in normal life. This means we are more likely to make silly mistakes
than normal, because we are rushing. Try and give yourself a few minutes at the end of your allotted time to read
through what you have written, even if you haven't quite finished. You may have already written enough for your
content grade and it gives you chance to ensure a good SPG grade. Read through this extract and catch the little
mistakes. There are 15!
The UK Youtube stars with fans around the world
The UKs most influential YouTube creators have been named in a top 10 list prodused for the BBC. How do selfmade stars like these become famous around the world. And are they taking over from tradishional celebrities?
Becky Sheeran, was shopping four years ago when, a girl she had never met walked up to her, asked for a hug, then
started crying. Becky is working as a television journalist at the time, but the girl didn't recognise her from TV - she
recognising her from videos she recorded in her spare time and uploaded to YouTube.
"I will never forget it", says the 27-year-old, from Nottinghamshire. "She knew everything about my life, my family,
my favourite foundation, my favourite clothes. It was just amazing ever since then its carried on happening."
Becky, who started making videos for her TalkBeckyTalk channel in 2009, eventually left TV to concentrate on
YouTube full-time. "Now [being recognised] happens most times I go into town, especially if I'm in a shopping
center, it always happens on a saturday because there are always woman they’re," she says.
REMEMBER: If you don’t get something, need help on something or are just panicking in general, see
your teacher. They will help you, set you straight and leave you feeling all pepped up for the next
challenge. If you find that stress is becoming a problem for you, then go and talk to your Year Leader.
Exemplar Answers
‘Young people in wealthy countries take what they have for granted: they should care
more about young people suffering in poor parts of the world, and do more to help
them.’
Write an article for a magazine of your choice in which you argue your response to
his statement.
Band 2 (5/16 content 4/8 SPG)
Young people take liberties! They believe they can have what they want, when they want and feel no way about it.
Over half of the population is suffering from poverty and it is left to older generation to try change their wellbeing
but my question is whats stopping young people contributing?
Some people say parents are to blame and I agree if you was smothered with goods and was not taught the value.
How you supposed to know other wise? parents spend over £3.000 a year per child in urban areas, in rural areas the average child has £250 spent on them a year.
Partial answer. There is some successful communication here, but it is confused at times. There is some awareness of purpose
and paragraphs help structure work. Some accuracy in SPG.
Band 2 (7/16 content 4/8 SPG)
I agree with this statement as young children in wealthy countries don’t reconise just how lucky they actually are. Take
for example school, people dont realise how lucky they’re to actually go to school and get free education as many people
in poor parts of the country would give anything to be in school.
Also children also take money for granted, they could be given £100 and still pull their face, however people in
places such as Africa would be over the moon with just £1.
Staticstics show that 75% of wealthy children say that £10 a day is not enough. What do people of such young age
need money for?
However, it isn’t just money that wealthy children take for granted, it could be family members such as their Mum
or Dad as they expect the parents/carers to provide from them the whole life, although what if you parent can not support you? 60% of children in India are orphthans however 30% of Brits said they wouldn’t care if anything happend to a
parent.
Although, some people could argue that young weather children dont need to help other countries as our country
needs alot doing ‘charity starts at home.’
Full answer. This candidate communicates with success, references some issues and has a variety of ideas. If I am honest, I
would stick to one viewpoint and go to town with it, otherwise it may become confusing and make your writing jumbled.
Band 3 (10/16 content 5/8 SPG)
Alright, How many children/ young adults do you know that complain about everything? Without a doubt, you know
more than two, just one of your friends, or someone you have heard about. Okay. Now are you one of them? Of course you
are! It is part of human nature - we complain for the sake of complaining. However, when you see the advert of the starving, hungry and dehydrated child - roughly the same age as you - what do you complain about? The fact that you can’t
finish your popcorn because you have been put off your appetite?
Many may argue that there is nothing young adults can do… really? Do we really as part of humanity think that
there is nothing we can do? Let me give you some numbers and facts 1 in 3 children donot have access to education in
India, according to 2014 research. 68% of India’s youth is hungry. 40% of children die before the age of 20. Simply acknowledging these facts makes a difference. Not repeating it, not knowing the impact. But actually wanting to make a difference. These facts alone make only a minority of people actually act on what they have heard and actually make a difference.
Although I understand that some people may state that they donated to charity once while in Asda, they put two, 2
pence coins in the helpthehungry box. They did their bit. Right? Just put your change in any box that seems to go to charity, any charity. Obviously, that is not a bad thing but by simply appreciating things in your own life - and not complaining
about not getting the latest iPhone 6 - makes a change.
Partial answer. This candidate communicates a clear viewpoint throughout, there is clear purpose, a sense of relationship with
the audience and a suitable tone. A range of devices are used and SPG is generally secure.
Exemplar Answers Continued
Band 4 (13/16 content 6/8 SPG)
As a teenager growing up in the twenty first century, I’ve had it all. A private jet and a three storey mansion? No. But a
stable upbringing, loving parents and education? You bet.
Today’s society has a clear-cut division, between the rich and the poor, the educated and the non-educated and
first world countries and third world countries. And this needs to change. All around me I see members of society over
indulging in unnecessary after unnecessary belongings, an iPhone 6 her, a rolex watch there. Do we need it?
Despite this, many people seem to target the younger members of society for this disgustingly overpriviledged
society, but what’s a child without the wealthy parent who provides such belongings. The fight against making the world
more economically equal is a battle that we all need to contribute too, adults included.
The main problem with the attitudes of people living in wealthy countries is they only look forward. In the race to
have the latest this or the latest that, many people fail to look back and support those falling behind, instead they focus
on overtaking the person infront. So my point is, just stop for a moment, take a look around, and realise just how many
people need help.
There is no doubt that younger generations need to take a more active role and participate in issues surrounding
those living in the developing areas of the world. But a fundraiser has its limits. A sponsored 5k run and a cake sale can
not produce the wide scale results that need to be achieved. Instead we need to put pressure on the members of the
government, many of whom are too busy arguing with one another to actually achieve anything. Other than those I’m
hugely supportive of the government can’t you tell?
Partial answer. Convincing argument in places. Structured answer with developed points. Candidate consistently matches
writing to purpose and audience. Generally secure SPG, range of punctuation and sentences for effect.
Band 4 (16/16 content 8/8 SPG)
WHEN THEY DIE, WHO IS TO BLAME? (Kid Twist magazine)
Remember that time where you had to walk seven miles to collect some water that was riddled with pathogens and dirt?
Remember that time your boss beat you with a whip for not sewing a T-shirt fast enough? Remember that time where
your mother made you dinner, read you a book and then tucked you in to sleep? If you aren’t from Africa, the only one
you will remember is the latter.
Be honest, do you care? Despite all those school assemblies, Christmas aid songs and TV adverts we young people
still fail to sympathise with other people our age who are forced to live in squalor and vile living conditions. One in five
African children are subject to physical abuse daily at work, according to charity researcher Ned Stark. Most young
people in the UK don’t even have jobs. We can’t see them, but they are there. Over a billion of them, silently suffering as
we live in our heated homes with two cars parked on the driveway. ‘But we’re just young people!’ you cry, ‘what could
we possibly do to help?’ Just because you are young doesn’t mean you are exempt from responsibility; there is still plenty
you could do to help children in poverty.
Mhambu was hopeless, deprived and close to death. His every day life consisted of a futile attempt to locate a
credible source of food and water, but at the end of the day he had to accept nutrition in the form of a single avocado and
a pitiful smidgeon of infested water. His optimism was dwindling and his shoulders were cracking like China plates
under the weight of supporting his mother and two younger brothers. That was until a teenager, the same age as you and
me, sent a small amount of tinned food to Christian Aid. It wasn’t a lot, granted, but it was enough to keep him going.
Over time Mhambu saved up enough money to rent his own stall at the local market and his survival is now ensured,
thanks to one warm hearted young person.
This answers the statement. We can help. Donations do not evaporate after we give them, they actually go towards
improving the quality of life of someone less fortunate than ourselves. However, the aid that others seek is not found on
the inside of a television screen or xbox controller. At the moment we are more concentrated on irrelevant, materialistic
things that we cannot carry to our graves. Whilst on your deathbed are you going to hug the games console you received
for Christmas? Are you going to hold your mobile phone next to you in a loving embrace. Or would you be more satisfied
in knowing you have created positivity in the world on your short, eventful temporary stop on Earth? Again, the latter
answer is clearly the correct one.
Partial answer. Controlled and mature style and register. Sustained and conscious crafting, the candidate works hard to engage the reader. Extensive vocabulary and virtually perfect SPG.
Question 1
Question 2
Task 1:
The Headline
A= issues of child labour

The headline is bold and eye-catching.
B= issues of children and starting school

The alliteration in ‘Festival fans’ engages the
reader and creates an image of thousands of
people enjoying themselves.
C= issues the writer has with Facebook
Task 2:

Whereas the Band 3 answer manages to explain the issue and
interprets what one example from the text tells the reader, the

Band 4 answer links different parts of the text together and
then explains the wider implications of the issue and what it
tells us about the world. This shows perceptive discussion of

the question and therefore receives 8/8.
Science text
“first priority” suggests there are lots of things to organise, as 
if this is the first of many priorities and that they all important.
“essentials for survival” suggests that if they want to survive
then they have to provide everything themselves - the Mars
atmosphere is hostile to humans and their first few weeks will
be tough, miserable and a race to live
“most” of the procedures will have been tested, not all of
them, so it suggests there are things that could still go wrong
or not work. The colonists will have to be resourceful,
proactive and adapt to any problems.
“frenzy” suggests that they will have to work exceptionally
quickly and exceptionally hard just to survive.
The word ‘revel’ suggests enjoyment and fun but
also that the fans immersed themselves in the
music and the mud.
‘Isle of Mud’ is a pun on Isle of Wight which is
where the revelling was held and is now mudcovered. ‘Wight’ and ‘white’ / mud coloured might
also be seen as a play on words.

The picture shows the density of the tents, the
extent of the mud and water, the odd clothing of
the people and the bizarreness of sitting outside
their tent. There is irony in their stoicism and
determination to behave as if the sun was shining.
Their clothing reflects the anarchy of their situation.

It also shows the two men defying the elements;
posing – addressing the readers and so including
them.
They have to provide their own food, as there is nothing to eat
on Mars. The rations sound like they are satisfactory for a

short time, but not a solution for the long term, it intimates
that these will not be sufficient. It may also suggest that they
will have to have a very strict diet.

Energy, food and water are all things we take for granted on
Earth, but things they will have to fight to set up on Mars
The sun is a positive thing on Earth, but on Mars it is
dangerous and could be potentially fatal, especially if they
cannot find the shelter it suggests in the article. It suggests
that the colonists will have a lot of things to get used to that
are alien.
‘elements’ is extended vocab used as a cliché; the
mud looks ‘elementary’ in another, evolutionary,
sense.
The Picture
“have a lot on their minds” - it will be a stressful time and that
may mean mistakes could be made and therefore jeopardise
their survival
The procedures to survive are all complex and difficult to set
up - there may be complications. The colonists will have to be
extremely well trained to cope with all the science.
The word ‘defy’ indicates the determination of the
fans, that they were in a battle with the elements.
The interior of the tent looks orderly but is resting
on a bed of wet mud – it makes us feel
uncomfortable, not envious.
The tents are densely packed, indicating the
number of fans. There is a lot of colour juxtaposed
with the mud, which reinforces the defiance/
festival attitude.
Links

The text clearly locates the event on the Isle of
Wight, the ‘Isle of Mud’.

The defiance of the headline is reflected in ‘typical
festival resilience kicked in’ from the text.

We see the festival-goers who are referenced in
the text.

The band’s attitude ‘ … haha’ indicates defiance,
perhaps revelry.
Question 2 Continued
Question 3 Continued
Links continued




The picture relates to the text: ‘torrential rain and
flooding created a mud bath around the site’,
‘surely they knew it would be muddy’, ‘the
“horrendous” weather’, ‘Fans pitched tents
…..where mud flowed “like gravy”’.
: NB the thoughts and feelings change at a pivotal moment in
the text.
Question 4
The density of tents links with: ‘About 55,000
people are expected to attend’.
Cameron Pictures
The picture of the mud lends a certain irony to
what we read in the text – the areas of the festival
being called ‘Strawberry Fields’ and ‘Penny Lane’.

Professional, smart, in control

Clearly talking to audience - they want to listen
Source 1

The text which speaks of an ‘emergency plan…’
links to the effects of the ‘elements’ in the title and
the mud flood we see in the picture. The mud is not 
healthy.

Question 3

Candidates‟ responses may include the following :



Using colours of the Conservative party - blue background, tie, plaque
Immaculately dressed
Clearly a professional environment
Using hand gestures to emphasise his words, showing
what he is saying is important
He says the couple were cruel so he must have felt bad
Source 2
about staying with them.

He’s on holiday
He must have felt lonely and neglected too because his

Topless, informal
mother could not get to meet him. He probably also
felt trapped, frightened and hungry. He was sad and
distressed.

He appreciated the country and London for different
reasons.
He felt resentment against the people because they
kept the evacuee money for themselves.

Sunburnt, careless

Slight gut - needs to look after his body more

Doesn’t care what other think of him

Relaxed, laid back, private
The first place instilled in him a feeling of fear of closed 
spaces and hatred for any cruelty to children.
Practise question

He said he was traumatised by the experience.
Source 3

He thought he’d rather take his chances with the
bombing in London than stay there.

The language in the text describes a possibly
serious encounter in a humorous way.

He felt happy when his mother took him back home.
He doesn’t seem to have been concerned about the
bombs, unlike his mother.


He thought Norfolk “was a paradise‟ and because of his
good experiences there, thinking back he feels that the
War “was the best thing that ever happened to me‟.

He felt fortunate because they had plenty of good food
in the countryside.

Instantly every neuron in my brain was awake and
dashing around frantically like ants when you
disturb their nest: this describes the thoughts of
panic and alarm rushing around his head with a
vivid simile which readers can relate to and will find
clever and amusing. Ants scurry about mindlessly
when disturbed. Neuron,dashing around, might be
picked out for comment.

He appreciated the „chance to roam free‟ in the
countryside.

He felt (realised) that he was rougher than the local
“kids‟.

Looking back he thinks he must have been a nuisance
and that the experience changed his life.
Once a skunk had come plodding through our
camp and it had sounded like a stegosaurus:
Another amusing simile – a skunk is a small animal
and a stegosaurus a huge dinosaur; the
juxtaposition, hyperbole, exaggeration of the sound
of a harmless creature compared with a giant killer
is amusing.
Question 4 practice continued



It was a perfectly respectable appliance for, say,

buttering pancakes, but patently inadequate for
defending oneself against 400 pounds of ravenous
fur: This description of his knife is humorous and
effective because of the contrast between homely 
pancakes and a wild 400 pounds of fur. The effect
is that the reader realises the ridiculous, comic and
yet potentially serious and deadly situation.
The description of Stephen’s character adds to the
humour of the situation. He is as unconcerned as
Bill is worried and offers sarcastic remarks and
suggestions: 'What are you doing?' 'I'm moving my 
tent.'
'Oh, good plan. That'll really confuse it.' The
reader can enjoy the understatement, irony and
two points of view of the situation and empathise
with both.
Source 1


Source 2

The vivid description of the people in the second
paragraph employs lists. This engages the reader
and establishes an idea of the lost, un-contacted

tribe. This is reinforced by the colourful description,
bodies decorated with red dye, armed with bows
and arrows which gives a sense of war-like, fierce
people (perhaps compared with Bryson’s wimpy
knife).
NB
The word enslaved and the information that they

had to escape may produce sympathy in the
reader.
The word ‘they’ used before the reader knows
what ‘they’ are – mystery, curiosity and tension are
the effects.
There are a number of descriptive words and
phrases about the jellyfish which evoke a repulsive,
grotesque creature in the reader’s mind, repulsive
and attracting at the same time: They are 6ft wide,
200 kg in weight, and pink, slimy and repellent.
Also descriptions like: rubber monsters from a
Godzilla film, authentic horror of the deep.
Unusual words are also effectively used to
describe this unusual jellyfish: armada of the
behemoths, poisoned and be- slimed, slimy
plague. These words also relate to the ideas of an
army, attacking, destroying, spreading destruction
as well as being physically revolting. This shocks
the reader at the same time as being entertaining.
There is also the language of facts in the text. This
adds authenticity to the article and shows the
serious side of the effects of the jellyfish.
The article ends on a humorous note. The idea of
jellyfish ice cream is bizarre and revolting and the
detail that it is ‘slightly chewy’ engages the taste
buds of the reader but the effect of the words is
probably revolting.
Candidates need to take these, and /or similar
examples and effects and compare their uses in
the contexts presented by the writers.

We are able to identify with the people through
descriptive phrases such as their baskets full of
manioc, a metal cooking pot.

Some ideas/factual language will shock the reader
such as the fact that contact with the outside world
Question 5
is described as disastrous, and that the common
cold can kill up to 50% of its population.
A)
F= online blog L= relaxed formal A= people interested in personal stories P= describe and explain
Words and phrases such as managed to escape
an uncertain situation
being colonised and isolation is increasingly

threatened brings home to the reader the
vulnerability of these tribes using words like
escape and threatened.

Candidates may include comments about person,
tense and devices but these need to be tied to
language and their effects explained for higher
marks.
B)
F= letter L= formal A= local people P= describe
your favourite place
C)
F= website entry L= formal A= people who read the
website P= describe the best and worst meal
Newspaper, Magazine, Blog
Text one is a newspaper (the guardian), it is impartial and reports the facts only. The text does not try to make us feel a
certain way about Nadiya, but tells us the truth only. It tells us
what she said, but makes no commentary on this.
Newspaper, Magazine, Blog continued
Proofreading
Text two is a magazine, HELLO. This one is much more
The UK Youtube (sp YouTube) stars with fans around
about Nadiya as a person; her family, her feelings, what
the world
she wants to do next. It uses words like “victory” which are
The UKs (P possessive apostrophe is UK’s) most
emotive and make us warm to her.
Text three is a blog (Digitalspy.co.uk). This is still formal in
terms of language, but much more informal with its
relationship with the audience. It talks directly to the
audience, “you”, is rather humorous, “stockpile cake” and
uses unusual and non-serious words “dastardly technical
challenges”. We could argue that “telly” is an informal
word, but here it cerates a homely feel, as if it is a friend
sharing in our obsession with GBBO, therefore using a familiar informal word.
Question 6
A)
F= newspaper article L= formal A= school/college
students, parents and teachers P= persuade people
to support homeless charities
B)
F= magazine article L= formal A= people interested
in their lifestyle P= persuade young people to improve their diet
C)
F= newspaper article L= formal A= adults P= argue
your viewpoint about role models
influential YouTube creators have been named in a top 10
list prodused (sp produced) for the BBC. How do self-made
stars like these become famous around the world.
(P should be a ?) And are they taking over from
tradishional (sp traditional) celebrities?
Becky Sheeran, (P no need for comma) was shopping four
years ago when, (P no need for comma) a girl she had
never met walked up to her, asked for a hug, then started
crying. Becky is (G should be in the past tense) working as
a television journalist at the time, but the girl didn't
recognise her from TV - she recognising (G wrong verb
form, should be recognised) her from videos she recorded
in her spare time and uploaded to YouTube.
"I will never forget it", (P comma should be inside speech
marks) says the 27-year-old, from Nottinghamshire. "She
knew everything about my life, my family, my favourite
foundation, my favourite clothes. It was just amazing
(missed word, should have ‘and’ here) ever since then its
(P missed apostrophe of omission, should be it’s)
carried on happening."
Becky, who started making videos for her TalkBeckyTalk
channel in 2009, eventually left TV to concentrate on
YouTube full-time. "Now [being recognised] happens most
times I go into town, especially if I'm in a shopping
center, (sp American spelling of centre) it always
happens on a saturday (C it’s a proper noun, so needs a
capital) because there are always woman (G needs to be a
plural women) they’re (WW should be there)," she says.