Assessment of Reading, Writing and Mathematics:
Primary Division
Released 2013 Assessment: Language 2, Writing
Item-Specific Rubrics and
Sample Student Responses with Annotations
EQAO, 2 Carlton Street, Suite 1200, Toronto, ON M5B 2M9 • 1-888-327-7377 • Web site: www.eqao.com • © 2011 Queen’s Printer for Ontario
EQAO, 2 Carlton Street, Suite 1200, Toronto, ON M5B 2M9 • 1-888-327-7377 • Web site: www.eqao.com • © 2011 Queen’s Printer for Ontario
EQAO, 2 Carlton Street, Suite 1200, Toronto, ON M5B 2M9 • 1-888-327-7377 • Web site: www.eqao.com • © 2013 Queen’s Printer for Ontario
Scoring Guide for Short Writing (2013)
Topic Development
New Kind of Transportation – Booklet 2 - Question 13
Q13: Imagine you have invented a new kind of transportation. Write a paragraph explaining
how it helps people.
Code
B
I
10
Descriptor
Blank: nothing written or drawn in the space provided
Illegible: cannot be read; completely crossed out / erased; not written in English
OR
Irrelevant content: does not attempt assigned prompt (e.g., comment on the task,
drawings, “?”, “!”, “I don’t know”)
OR
Off topic: no relationship of written work to assigned prompt
OR
Errors in conventions prevent communication
Response is not developed; ideas and information are limited and unclear.
Organization is random with no links between ideas. Response has a limited
relationship to the assigned task.
20
Response is minimally developed with few ideas and little information.
Organization is minimal with weak links between ideas. Response is partly related
to the assigned task.
30
Response has a clear focus, adequately developed with ideas and supporting details.
Organization is simple or mechanical with adequate links between ideas. Response
is clearly related to the assigned task.
40
Response has a clear focus, well-developed with sufficient specific and relevant
ideas and supporting details. Organization is logical and coherent with effective
links between ideas. Response has a thorough relationship to the assigned task.
Scoring Guide for Short Writing (2013)
Topic Development
New Kind of Transportation – Booklet 2 - Question 13
Code 10
Annotation:
Response is not developed; ideas and information are limited and unclear (e.g., My transportation
will help others because they will get to move place to place…). Organization is random with no
links between ideas (e.g., …and they get to play games).
Response has a limited relationship to the assigned task.
Scoring Guide for Short Writing (2013)
Topic Development
New Kind of Transportation – Booklet 2 - Question 13
Code 20
Annotation:
Response is minimally developed with few ideas and little information (e.g., I have invented the
digger mate 3000. can go under ground…as fast as you want…has an itached xbox 360…10
people per 1 car). Organization is minimal (e.g., I have…It can go…It has…It can also…).
Response is partly related to the assigned task.
Scoring Guide for Short Writing (2013)
Topic Development
New Kind of Transportation – Booklet 2 - Question 13
Code 30
Annotation:
Response has a clear focus and is adequately developed with ideas and supporting details (e.g.,
…can help people because…It has saftey features like non-slip peddles…gets people around
faster…because it has a electric, re-chargeable, high powered motor!…even runs by itself…).
Organization is simple and mechanical with adequate links between ideas (e.g., The rocket bike
can help people…It has…It also gets…It’s because it has…The rocket bike even…).
Response is clearly related to the assigned task.
Scoring Guide for Short Writing (2013)
Topic Development
New Kind of Transportation – Booklet 2 - Question 13
Code 40
Annotation:
Response has a clear focus, and is well-developed with sufficient specific and relevant ideas (e.g.,
The Amazing Flyer 3000…has a cofee and soda despencer… The Amazing flyer 3000 is powered
by grass!) and supporting details (e.g., …you don’t have to waste time making cofee at home…If
you are going to the gym…The Amazing Flyer 300 has a smoothie/energy drink maker…If you are
stuck in a traffic jam, don’t worry that flying car can fly over traffic not making you late for
work!). Organization is logical and coherent with an opening and closing sentence and effective
links between ideas (e.g., My imgginary invention is The Amazing Flyer 3000! It has…If you are
going to the gym…If you are stuck…Don’t even think about buying gas, just grab some
grass!…That’s my super duper invention of new transportaion).
Response has a thorough relationship to the assigned task.
Scoring Guide for Short Writing (2013)
Conventions
New Kind of Transportation – Booklet 2 – Question 13
Q13: Imagine you have invented a new kind of transportation. Write a paragraph explaining
how it helps people.
Descriptor
B
I
Blank: nothing written or drawn in the space provided
Illegible: cannot be read; completely crossed out / erased; not
written in English
OR
Errors in conventions prevent communication
10
Errors in conventions interfere with communication
OR
Insufficient evidence to assess the use of conventions
20
Errors in conventions do not interfere with communication
30
Conventions are used appropriately to communicate
Scoring Guide for Short Writing (2013)
Conventions
New Kind of Transportation – Booklet 2 – Question 13
Code 10
Annotation:
Response has errors in conventions (e.g., omission of all beginning and ending punctuation
creating one run-on sentence: the floting car is the best transportation you could think of it can go
faster then eney thing you can flot over cars no trafick; misspelled words: flot, trafick, “then” for
“than”, “eny” for “any”) that interfere with communication.
Response does not demonstrate the use of expected conventions.
Scoring Guide for Short Writing (2013)
Conventions
New Kind of Transportation – Booklet 2 – Question 13
Code 20
Annotation:
Response has errors in conventions (e.g., inconsistent use of beginning and ending punctuation,
creating a run-on sentence: You could go any ware in the word with a flying care it would help you
get to school faster; misspelled words: “care” for “car”, trafik, placses, any ware, “word” for
“world”) that do not interfere with communication. Some control of simple sentences is evident.
Response demonstrates the use of some expected conventions.
Scoring Guide for Short Writing (2013)
Conventions
New Kind of Transportation – Booklet 2 – Question 13
Code 30
Annotation:
Response uses conventions appropriately to communicate (e.g., consistent use of beginning and
ending punctuation; uses complex and compound sentences; uses a variety of punctuation:
periods, commas, a dollar sign, a question mark, exclamation marks and a colon). Some errors
may exist (e.g., misspelled words: diffrent, apsolute; misplaced capital letters: Fly, Jiffy).
Response demonstrates control of expected conventions.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing (2013)
Topic Development
You Find a Ticket in a Book – Language Booklet 2 - Question 7
Q7: You find a ticket in a book at the library. Write a story about what the ticket is for and what
you do with it.
Code
B
I
10
Descriptor
Blank: nothing written or drawn in the space provided
Illegible: cannot be read; completely crossed out / erased; not written in English
OR
Irrelevant content: does not attempt assigned prompt (e.g., comment on the task,
drawings, “?”, “!”, “I don’t know”)
OR
Off topic: no relationship of written work to assigned prompt
OR
Errors in conventions prevent communication
Response is not developed; ideas and information are limited and unclear.
Organization is random with no links between ideas.
Response has a limited relationship to the assigned task.
20
Response is minimally developed with few ideas and little information.
Organization is minimal with weak links between ideas.
Response is partly related to the assigned task.
30
Response has a clear focus, adequately developed with ideas and supporting details.
Organization is simple or mechanical with adequate links between ideas.
Response is clearly related to the assigned task.
40
Response has a clear focus, well-developed with sufficient specific and relevant
ideas and supporting details. Organization is logical and coherent with effective
links between ideas.
Response has a thorough relationship to the assigned task.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing (2013)
Topic Development
You Find a Ticket in a Book – Language Booklet 2 - Question 7
Code 10
Annotation:
Response is not developed; ideas and information are limited and unclear (e.g., I was wakiNg thRo the
LibRarY…AND thaR wasa ticket AND iseiD FRee game ticket).
Response has a limited relationship to the assigned task.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing (2013)
Topic Development
You Find a Ticket in a Book – Language Booklet 2 - Question 7
Code 20
Annotation:
Response is minimally developed with few ideas and little information (e.g.,…I saw a purplelgolden ticket it
said 10,000 icecreams Free! at baskin robins…I got 10,000 icecream…choclate, strawberry, cookie dough,
mint choclate chip and more…). Organization is minimal (e.g., One day I opened…then I saw…So I
went…I got…I never got...me and my icecream lived happily ever after The End!).
Response is partly related to the assigned task.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing (2013)
Topic Development
You Find a Ticket in a Book – Language Booklet 2 - Question 7
Code 30
Annotation:
Response has a clear focus and is adequately developed with ideas and supporting details (e.g., …I was
walking down a iyel of a library and found a book…Thar was a hockey ticket in it! The game was in 3 hours
I coud not go alown…The to teams Playing was tronto and monryol in tronto…Tronto won 3-0).
Organization is simple and mechanical with adequate links between ideas (e.g., One day…Thar was…I
ran...and sade…and tolld…so we went…We take the tran…and wacht…Than we went home and Feel a
sleep).
Response is clearly related to the assigned task.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing (2013)
Topic Development
You Find a Ticket in a Book – Language Booklet 2 - Question 7
Code 40
Annotation:
Response has a clear focus, and is well-developed with sufficient specific and relevant ideas and supporting
details (e.g., …I found a ticket in afariy tale coll-ection book! It said: Enter the pin-code: WF24YX at
Winmoney.com for a chance to win 100,000 dollar’s! I ran 14 block’s utill I got home…). Organization is
logical and coherent with an opening sentence and effective links between ideas (e.g., I was at the library
yesturday and I found a ticket…I ran…I burst in…and yelled:...My mom and dad came runing…My m-om
and dad ran wildly…We waited two month’s utill we got a email saying: You have won the grand prize:
100,000 dollar’s!).
Response has a thorough relationship to the assigned task.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing (2013)
Conventions
You Find a Ticket in a Book – Booklet 2 - Question 7
Q7: You find a ticket in a book at the library. Write a story about what the ticket is for and what
you do with it.
Descriptor
B
I
Blank: nothing written or drawn in the space provided
Illegible: cannot be read; completely crossed out / erased; not
written in English
OR
Errors in conventions prevent communication
10
Errors in conventions interfere with communication
OR
Insufficient evidence to assess the use of conventions
20
Errors in conventions do not interfere with communication
30
Conventions are used appropriately to communicate
Scoring Guide for Long Writing (2013)
Conventions
You Find a Ticket in a Book at the Library – Booklet 2 - Question 7
Code 10
Annotation:
Response has errors in conventions (e.g., inconsistent use of beginning and ending punctuation resulting
in a run-on sentence; misplaced capital letters: Flacht, beFor, My, Mgic, stuFF; misspelled words: whent,
Flacht, beFor, Mgic, “sinny” for “shiny”, dis apird, “sow” for “saw”; incomplete sentence: …it had cool
stuFF that never sow) that interfere with communication.
Response does not demonstrate the use of expected conventions.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing (2013)
Conventions
You Find a Ticket in a Book at the Library – Booklet 2 - Question 7
Code 20
Annotation:
Response has errors in conventions (e.g., misplaced capital letters: uPon, Picked, Park, My, Money, Pore;
misspelled words: libary, sed, thosand, doller, reseach, quater, “Pore” for “Poor”; incorrect contraction:
you’sed; missing capital letters: then, ontario) that do not interfere with communication.
Response demonstrates the use of some expected conventions.
Scoring Guide for Long Writing (2013)
Conventions
You Find a Ticket in a Book at the Library – Booklet 2 - Question 7
Code 30
Annotation:
Response uses conventions appropriately to communicate (e.g., uses a variety of punctuation: capital
letters, periods, quotation marks, uses an exclamation mark; uses commas). Some errors may exist (e.g.,
uses incorrect verb tense: I had no classes, so I can play with my friends; misspelled word: icecream).
Conventions are used appropriately to communicate.
Response demonstrates control of expected conventions.