Happily Ever After:
Guiding Our Students
Through Choice-Angst
Dorise Gruber
Assistant Director for Freshman Affairs
Boston University School of Management
Learning Outcomes
• Gain better understanding of Choice-Angst
• Examine Social Psychological studies to
understand how our students (and we) expect to
find happiness from our choices in the future
(and why our predictions are often wrong)
• Discover how these principles fit into existing
decision-making models
• Create tools based on this knowledge to aid our
work in advising students paralyzed by choice
The Inspiration
• A podcast
• a TED (Technology/Entertainment/Design) talk***
• and a student appointment
***With tremendous gratitude owed to Dan Gilbert,
Professor of Social Psychology, Harvard University, for his
research and insight.
Choice-Angst
• “The Disease of Modernity”
– (from Radiolab w/Barry Schwartz, Professor of Psychology, Swarthmore College)
– The agony of choice is a relatively new concept!
• Pizza with *everything* on it
– Breakfast cereal
– String beans
– Yogurt
• BLECH
• You gotta pick something!!!
• When decisions are necessary, between A, B, and
nothing, nothing is the worst choice.
Predicting the Future
• We have a hard time imagining the future
much differently than the present
"I don't have one
minute's regret. It was
a glorious experience.”
-Moreese Bickham,
New York Times, 1996
• …said after being exonerated for a murder
he didn’t commit with DNA evidence.
• …at age 78. 37 years after being in prison
on death row.
• This is not a fluke!
• An example of extremes
• Our present, much like our future, is
dynamic
The Psychological Immune System
• Cognitive Dissonance
– a discomfort caused by holding conflicting cognitions
(e.g., ideas, beliefs, values, emotional reactions)
simultaneously. In a state of dissonance, people may
feel surprise, dread, guilt, anger, or embarrassment.
The theory of cognitive dissonance in social
psychology proposes that people have a motivational
drive to reduce dissonance by altering existing
cognitions or adding new ones to create consistency.
Cognitive Dissonance
• The Fox and the Grapes (Aesop)
– A Fox cannot reach the high-hanging fruit, decides the grapes must
be sour.
– Desire something but cannot attain it – reduce dissonance by
criticizing.
– Cognitive Dissonance = Sour Grapes
Synthetic v. Natural Happiness
• Dan Gilbert TED clip (8:37-14:33)
• “The Free-Choice Paradigm”
• In essence: choices are different once you
make them!
The Advisor’s Dilemma
• Despite now knowing under which
conditions our students can be most
satisfied with their decisions…
• …we often cannot control the conditions
Our Role as Advisors
• “Skilled educators . . . help students
develop their plans considering the kinds
of challenge and support they need to
succeed, and help them reflect and make
meaning about their learning from those
experiences.” (Learning Reconsidered, 2004)
Peace of Mind
• We know that a student will
eventually be content with the
path that they chose!
• (even if they’re not, most
wrongs can be righted)
• …we just need to help them
believe it, too
• Without sounding patronizing!
Is there a “Best Way?”
• The two best indicators of what will make
someone the most content with his/her
decision
– The knowledge of how many other people
experienced the same decision at different
points in the cycle
– “Prefeeling”
Calling on Experience/
Information Gathering
• Students are skeptical if it’s not personal!
• Calling on upper-classmen
– Senior Mentors
– Academic Success Panel
– Or even anecdotally
• In-house data
• Rate My Professor?
• Informational Interviews
– Be wary of already synthesized choices!
– Ask about feelings throughout process
“Prefeelings” experiment
• In selecting a poster to take home, one group was
asked to explain their choice (Thinkers), the other
encouraged to pick quickly and trust their gut
(Nonthinkers).
• When called later and asked how much they liked
the poster they chose, who was happier?
• Thinkers were less happy than Nonthinkers!
• Why?
Prefeeling
• “Prefeeling allowed Nonthinkers to predict their future
satisfaction more accurately than Thinkers did. Indeed,
when people are prevented from feeling emotion in the
present, they become temporarily unable to predict how
they will feel in the future.” (Dan Gilbert, Stumbling on Happiness)
• Prefeeling has limits on prediction of future feelings, but
worth noting: encourage students to go with their gut!
• Implication: maybe it’s best *not* for a student to explain
his/her decision to us (until a decision has been made).
• More on this later.
Angst-inducing questions
• Bound choices (deadline):
– To drop, or not to drop?
• Unbound choices (open-ended):
– What should I do with my life? (Majors,
Minors, Dual Degrees, Study Abroad,
Internships, Jobs, etc).
Decision Models
• DECIDES Model (Krumboltz & Hamel, 1977)
– Basic model, good start for bound choices
• Decision Cycle (Carney & Wells, 1999)
– For unbound choices, and for those with
choice-angst
Both referenced from NACADA Region I 2010 presentation by Kim-Marie Jenkins &
Stacy Stewart of University of Southern Maine
Bound Questions:
It’s the last day to drop…
• When there’s no going back, these are
optimal conditions under which synthetic
happiness may grow.
DECIDES Model
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
Define the Problem
Establish an Action Plan
Clarify Values
Identify Alternatives
Discover Probable Outcomes***
Eliminate Alternatives Systematically
Start Action
• ***as we’ve discussed, this can be problematic
It’s the last day to drop…
• Review steps student has taken to this point
• Logical reaction: weigh the pros and cons
(transcript, GPA, emotional sanity)
• Gut reaction: for the intuitors, but also often most
accurate. Decision doesn’t need to be made onthe-spot (maybe better not to)!
• Create a game-plan for the choice made, let go
of the choice they didn’t
Letting Go
• Remember what Dan Gilbert said about
freedom to change your mind being the
enemy of synthetic happiness?
• Once a student makes a decision, helping
them let go of the choice they didn’t make
helps them synthesize their choice.
Unbound Questions:
What do I do with my life?
• When there are too many options, how do
we help a student make the right choice?
For Starters…
• Sometimes, the best choice is to not make
a choice
• Yet.
• “Never make a choice until you have to.
Leave things as open as possible as long
as you can. Better question: ‘what class
do I take next semester?’ Not ‘what do I
do with my life?’” –Dan Gilbert
Delaying the Decision-Making
• Class year matters, we have to meet them
where they’re at
• Help students keep their options open until
they actually need to make a decision
• Be more directive than just “you can do
anything!” Millenials want options, and
specific-to-them recommendations.
The Decision Cycle
• Awareness – Something needs to change
• Self-Assessment – What does student want, what is
he/she willing to sacrifice? What is the intersection
between student’s talents and interests?***
• Exploration – Information-gathering stage***
• Integration – Learn through experience, then reevaluate
• Commitment – When student is ready to move ahead
• Implementation – The plan to proceed***
• Reevaluation – Is the student happy with his/her
decision?
• ***This is where we come in (before and after)
Tool Box
• What tools can we employ to help our students make
tough, unbound choices, bearing in mind the way
students will synthesize the outcome?
• Close your eyes – rank importance of options 1-10
• A river of post-its
• Applying the Free Choice Paradigm when top options
aren’t realistic?
• Whip out the transcript
• Assuring them they’re choosing between equally good
(or equally lousy) options
• Handing over the planning
Handing over the planning
• Promotes:
– Education
– Buy-in
• Instead of talking it through piece-by-piece, they
need to struggle through following their gut. We
can start the conversation, but ultimately the
struggle will be on their own internally. Crafting
a written plan helps students to synthesize their
choices. Can review with us after planning to
ensure requirements are met.
Our Role as Advisors
•
•
•
•
Lay down realistic boundaries
Be pointed with our recommendations
Provide students with the resources they need
Let students struggle through a bit to synthesize their
decisions
• Help students plan and re-plan as their focus becomes
clearer
• Decisions are not eternal! The average American
changes jobs 10x
Word of Caution:
• If a student is in a bad mood, or is in the
midst of a particularly stressful time, if at
all possible, encourage them to hold off on
making important decisions.
• Prefeelings will be clouded, and bleaker in
the context of the present.
When it doesn’t come easy…
• What about those who don’t synthesize
their decisions?
– More research called for, but often depression
is involved
Changing Cognitions
• We’re not therapists.
• But, we can
encourage steps to
help rewire negative
cognitions.
• Sean Achor TED talk
(10:58-12:16)
When all else fails
• If you think a student will be responsive to
it, share what you’ve learned today!
• “I can tell you the secret to happiness…”
• “…we create our own.”
“Wise Words”
• “There is no total satisfaction, and in essence,
that is good, for complete satisfaction is a knock
on the door to boredom. As long as we dream of
things, there is stimulation and reason to move
forward.”
• “Every choice has its price, and that cost is other
choices. It is in our best interest to rejoice in the
choices we purchase and not lament the ones
we spend.”
-Beverly Stillerman Gruber, 1988
QUESTIONS?
Resources
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•
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Achor, Shawn.“The Happiness Advantage: Linking Positive Brains to
Performance.” TEDxBloomington. May 2011. Web. 13 Feb. 2012.
<http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GXy__kBVq1M>.
"Archive Gallery: Kitchens of the Incredible 1950s Future." Popular Science
Magazine. Bonnier Corporation, 10 Nov. 2010. Web. 11 Jan. 2012.
"Choice - Radiolab." Home - Radiolab. Radiolab, 17 Nov. 2008. Web. 11
Jan. 2012. <http://www.radiolab.org/2008/nov/17/>.
"Cognitive Dissonance." Wikipedia, the Free Encyclopedia. Web. 11 Jan.
2012. <http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cognitive_dissonance>.
"Dan Gilbert Asks, Why Are We Happy? | Video on TED.com." TED: Ideas
worth Spreading. Sept. 2006. Web. 11 Jan. 2012.
<http://www.ted.com/talks/dan_gilbert_asks_why_are_we_happy.html>.
Gilbert, Daniel Todd. Stumbling on Happiness. New York: Vintage, 2007.
Print.
Gruber, Beverly Stillerman. "Wise Words." The Milwaukee Journal 18 Dec.
1988. Google News. Web. 11 Jan. 2012.
Resources
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•
•
•
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Jenkins, Kim-Marie, and Stacy Stewart. "Decision Making in the College
Experience." 2010 NACADA Region I Conference. MA, Newton. Mar. 2010.
Lecture.
Larson, Gary. The Far Side Gallery. Kansas City: Andrews, McMeel &
Parker, 1984. Print.
Learning Reconsidered: A Campus-wide Focus on the Student Experience.
[S.l.]: NASPA, 2004. Print.
Sack, Kevin. "After 37 Years in Prison, Inmate Tastes Freedom." New York
Times [New York, New York] 11 Jan. 1996. Web.
"University College." Choosing a Major. Southern Utah University, 13 July
2011. Web. 06 Mar. 2012. <http://www.suu.edu/ss/acdc/choosemajordecisions.html>.