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BUTTING INTO COMPLICATION
Dear Jack,
You don't know much about life, do you? When the subject of your pursuit
ominously warns you you have no idea what you're trying to get into, shouldn't
you reflect? I mean this is direct warning, it's not some third party hearsay. The
woman herself is warning you. She's in effect telling you you shouldn't be
pursuing her but if you decide to continue, don't complain if you suffer. She's
warning you you don't know what you're dealing with, that you really don't know
her, or know ABOUT her. In other words, your romantic notions are completely
out of whack with reality. There are hidden realities about her below the surface
is what she's telling you, things you know nothing about. But you have decided to
be the famed hunter in D.O. Fagunwa's Forest of a Thousand Demons. You're
ogboju ode! You have decided to go hunting where mortals fear to thread. I
admire your courage, or foolishness.
You know very well her present boyfriend is struggling, that their relationship is
being torn apart. But in your wisdom you consider that auspicious. Their
problem has become your opportunity so you decided to swoop in. And yet the
object of your amorous pursuit is warning you to stay off! Hmn! If you really
think about it she's telling you you're just a child. (You are.) Children shouldn't
get involved in adult stuff. She's either alluding to her character, telling you she's
not what you think, that she's a really tough cookie. Or she's alluding to her
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@LekeAlder @jacknjillive
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Leke Alder 2016
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temperament – telling you in effect you can't handle her when she turns into a
fire-breathing dragon. Or she's alluding to some very potent and dark spiritual
stuff you can't even begin to contemplate. In which case she feels sorry for you.
But if you do decide to butt your head, why, that would be voluntary
manslaughter. She's saying you're on a suicide mission and you need to examine
your senses before you get pulled over the event horizon.
If she's alluding to the spiritual, can you deal with the demons involved? Should
you be tangling with such beings? These beings are vicious. Why would you go
for complicatedness? There are women without complications. But if her
warning is wholly about character (and I do hope so), she's warning you she's
going to dominate your spirit. She's telling you the relationship is going to be
power dynamic and you're going to wish you never started a relationship. I can't
but concur with her that you don't know what you want to get yourself into,
whatever that is. Whatever is the allure will evaporate when she gives you a
sampling of what's in store for you for the rest of your life.
Besides, you can't even afford her economically. She's ahead of you. You're
going in way over your head. Proximity breeds imaginative possibilities and
possibility imaginations. Yes, she's your friend, but even she's saying you have
no knowledge of her, haven't scratched the surface. You think you know her but
you don't know jack is what she's telling you. You're luxuriating in delusion. But
if you still want her she's available. So also is all that stuff she warned you about.
There's plenteousness. Some people travel through life with excess luggage. But
then there are those with cargo. This woman is a freight forwarder. This is not
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some elementary stuff is what she's telling you. It's not ordinary excess luggage.
This is not some stuff you can address falsely believing if you love her the issues
will go away. Really? It's always presumptuous to imagine you can change
someone. You yourself need some help. How can you deconstruct and
reconfigure whom you never created? You don't even have access code. The
simplistic notion you'll move into someone's life and change the person is soon
confronted with reality. As if humans are some unicellular animals and so with
one tweak you can alter someone's personality and erase the history. You can't
alter a tapeworm not to talk of a human. If you doubt go and teach a tapeworm
not to burrow. Some people are hoping to marry the reformed human of their
imagination, not the person right in front of them. You want to marry a hope, a
supposition, a desire; you ignore the factuality of the living entity right in front
of you. Do you know how complex the make-up of man is? So how do you
imagine you can change someone, or reconfigure someone? You've been
watching too many plastic surgery programmes on TV, programmes like
Botched. Even reconfiguring the body has immense limitations. How are you
going to reconfigure a soul? How are you going to deal with her legacy data?
That legacy data gave birth to what's in front of you. How do you intend to
recode the soul of a human? Do you have messiah complex or what? People
imagine they can use their lives to clean up others. It's Exorcist movie thinking.
Yet Exorcist is misinformation. When you do get into that exorcist task you'll
quickly realise you've embarked on an impossible undertaking.
Some people just like complications when it comes to relationships. They're like
those people who never take a straightforward route to a destination. They'd
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rather go round and round taking backstreets and alleys, and in the process
confuse themselves. There's a nice young woman you can date. She's easy,
loving, has good character. But you'd rather go for complication. You have a lust
for complication. And when this woman is finished with you, you won't
recognise yourself. It's not just young men who butt their head into complicated
stuff, some women do too. You must love complication if you go for a married
man. Then there are guys who start another relationship without breaking up
with their girlfriend. They're complication creators. And they won't tell the new
girlfriend about the subsisting relationship. They begin to lead double life.
Another stupid complication is when a guy tells a girl to compete for his
affection with other girls after sleeping with her. That kind of problem won't get
resolved in an entire lifetime. It's usually complicated by pregnancies. I'm just
telling you to seek the straight and narrow way when it comes to relationship.
Avoid serpentine complications. You never know what you're getting yourself
into with these serpentine complications. Leave this woman alone. Half a word
is enough for the wisdom-minded.
Your mentor, LA
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