Speakeasy
Alcoholics Anonymous All South Bay Central Office Newsletter
1411 Marcelina Ave., Torrance, CA 90501 [email protected] · email
Summer Issue 2016
310- 618- 1180·ph
The Speakeasy is published by the All South Bay Central Office of Alcoholics Anonymous. Opinions expressed are those of the
writer and not of Alcoholics Anonymous as a whole or of Central Office. We welcome and need your input, opinions,
humor and comments. Send them today.
Becoming Human
INSIDE THIS ISSUE
Step/Tradition
2
Group Contributions
2
Why Support Central office
3
5th Tradition
4
The Club Corner
6
Honesty Poem
7
Humor
8
Fearless
STEP 4
Since I was very young I was
always trying to understand why
I felt so different than other people
around me. At age 16 I drank for
the first time and I immediately
discovered the magic potion that
unlocks the mystery of life. All
of a sudden I intuitively knew
what was going on, I no longer
felt the need to ask anybody about
anything. I had breached the wall
that separated me from “them” and
I joined their world.
There was nothing wrong here
as far as I could tell; alcohol became
loyal and consistent in delivering
the goods. Unbeknown to me I had
just started down the path of an
alcoholic life where alcohol became
the solution to every problem and
sobriety in itself became the major
problem. To the extent that at times
I looked inside to try to see and
understand, I always reached the
quick conclusion that my problems
were caused all by external sources
of people, places and things.
After 26 years of alcoholic
(Continued on page 5)
STEP 5
My name is Christophe, I’m an
alcoholic of the hopeless variety.
I knew nothing of AA when
I attended my first meeting, by
“mistake”, in June of 1984. I’ve
been coming back ever since and
I’m grateful to have been given the
grace not to pick up the first one
since August 4, 1984. I was 30 years
old.
I came to you lonely, angry,
separate and afraid. I knew my
hopeless condition and was certain
to die from it.
At my first meeting the man
who had sent me there and met
me there became my sponsor
and urged me to get the Big Book
and to start reading with him; his
instructions were simple: get a
big spiral notebook, a highlighter,
highlight in the book what applies
to me and write about it. When I
got to the 12 Steps, I followed the
same instructions and by winter of
1984 I was writing my 4th Step.
I finished it early January 1985.
Up to this point I was consumed by
fear, rage and the daily obsession to
drink and the only thing preventing
me from drinking was the fear of
going back to it and dying from it.
I was waiting for the miracle, not
realizing it was already unfolding
as I had not gotten drunk for over
5 months, a first in 20 years! I could
not wait to meet with my sponsor
to take Step 5 but on the other hand
I was scared and ashamed. When I
(Continued on page 5)
My Character Defects
STEP 6
When I first got to Alcoholics
Anonymous I had no idea what
Character defects were until I
did steps 1 through 5 - especially
step 5. When I finished reading
my inventory to my sponsor she
pointed out a few of my defects
and then had me define the words
“defect” and “character”. I also
had to define the seven deadly
sins (pride, greed, anger, lust,
gluttony, envy, and sloth) so I
could relate them to my behavior
and understand how they are part
of my life. My next assignment
was to change the focus of the set
aside prayer to see the truth of my
Character defects and receive the
willingness to have them removed.
Then I made a list of Character
defects
from
my
inventory
and distilled them down to be
categorized under the seven deadly
sins. That was very interesting
because I had 5 major deadly
sins that kept popping up in my
inventory. I then sat in those seven
deadly sins for 7 days. During that
time I considered what benefit I
derived from each character defect
and at the end the day I had to
pray about my willingness to let
them go. This was difficult for me
because I lived with these seven
deadly sins most of my life and
thought they were assets. Some
had become my most commonly
used defense mechanisms. My
(Continued on page 4)
Step/Tradition
4
5
STEP
“Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves”.
TRADITION
Each group should be autonomous except in matters
affecting other groups or A.A. as a whole.
STEP
“Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being
the exact nature of our wrongs’.
TRADITION
Each group has but one primary purpose—to carry its
message to the alcoholic who still suffers.
6
STEP
“Were entirely ready to have God remove all these
defects of character”.
TRADITION
An A.A. group ought never endorse, finance, or lend the A.A. name
to any related facility or outside enterprise,lest problems of money,
property, and prestige divert us from our primary purpose.
JANUARY
2016
FEBRUARY
2016
GROUP CONTRIBUTIONS
$4.028.92
$3,227.08
MONTHLY NET INCOME*
$1,150.81
$2,122.06
YTD NET INCOME **
-$12,243.41
-$10,121.35
Complete Financial Reports may be obtained
Through your CSR or Central Office.
*Surplus/Deficit for month after expenses
**Cumulative surplus/deficit for fiscal year (May 2015 – April 2016)
BOOK OF THE MONTH
PAMPHLET OF THE MONTH
MARCH
2016
$3,154.87
-$2,379.17
-$12,500.52
All South Bay
Central Office
1411 Marcelina Ave.
Torrance, CA 90501
310.618.1180
Open 7 a.m. to 10 p.m., Mon.- Fri.
9 a.m. to 7 p.m., Sat. & Sun.
Web site: www.southbayaa.org
Email : [email protected]
Board of Directors
4th Tuesday of the month
6:30 p.m.
1411 Marcelina Ave.,
Torrance, CA
Intergroup
4th Tuesday of the month
7:30 p.m.
1411 Marcelina Ave.,
Torrance CA
District 1
2nd Thursday of the month
7:30 p.m.
Kiwanis Club
2525 Valley Drive (Valley at Gould)
Hermosa Beach, CA
Newcomer’s Orientation 7:00 p.m.
District 3
2 Tuesday of the month
7:30 p.m.
Wayside Methodist Church
25904 Cayuga Avenue
Lomita, CA
nd
Hospitals & Institutions
3 Tuesday of the month
7:00 p.m.
South Bay Alano Club
702 11th Place
Hermosa Beach, CA
Newcomer’s Orientation 6:30 p.m.
rd
The General Service Office
Hard & Soft Spanish Literature now
available
PO Box 459,
Grand Central Station NY 10163
2
Why Support Central Office?
Controversy in AA is nothing new. Introduce a group of ten alcoholics to a topic and you will elicit a dozen
different opinions. So it should come as no surprise to anybody that there are differing views among AA
members and groups regarding Central Office and the Intergroup. Some support it with their money, time
and talents while others do not. While this is a choice that each is free to make on their own, it is important
that the decision be properly informed.
Let’s take a look at some of the reasons why AA members and groups do not support Central Office.
Information regarding each issue will be provided to help you make your own informed decision.
Central Office is not necessary to AA
To best evaluate this view it is necessary to understand the key functions of Central Office (ASBCO):
• Literature and supplies – ASBCO stocks a large selection of official AA pamphlets and books and sells them to
South Bay groups at a small markup. Chips, signs and other supplies are also available on demand 7 days a
week in large or small quantities.
• Meeting Directory – ASBCO creates edits, publishes and distributes the South Bay meeting Directory in print
and on-line. This is an important tool for newcomers seeking to find meetings as well as AA members relocating to this area. How else will they find us?
• Telephone Hot Line – ASBCO maintains a 24 hour hot line manned by trained, sober AA members. This line
handles approximately 400 calls per month. This is the only local number listed for AA and represents a significant lifeline for the suffering alcoholic reaching out to us.
• 12 Step Workers – ASBCO maintains a list of AA’s who are willing to make 12 step calls. Phone volunteers
connect callers seeking help with appropriate volunteers who supply it.
“Just as the aim of each A.A. member is personal sobriety, the aim of our services is to bring sobriety within reach of all who want
it. If nobody does the group’s chores, if the area’s telephone rings unanswered, if we do not reply to our mail, then A.A. as we
know it would stop”
Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, Tradition 9, published by Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc. (Page 175)
Central Office is outside of AA’s Traditions
Central Office and Intergroup (the body of CSRs representing the groups) have almost as long a history as
AA itself. The forerunner of today’s Intergroup/Central Office was formed in Cleveland, Ohio in October
1939, only four years after Bill W. and Dr. Bob first met. Traditions 8 and 9 were formulated largely with
them in mind. The terms service boards and service centers used in the Traditions reflect directly on the
Intergroup and Central Office.
Central Office doesn’t need our money
ASBCO is set up as a non-profit organization with minimal overhead. While most of the work is done by
volunteers, there are expenses to be covered: rent, insurance, salary and benefits for one full time employee,
phone lines, computers, maintenance and supplies. In the current fiscal year, monthly expenses average
$12,600 while monthly income averages only $11,600. This puts ASBCO at a $12,000 loss for the year – the
second time in our history to lose money, the first time being last year when we lost $2,400. All income is
derived from individual AA member and group contributions, plus proceeds from fundraisers and literature
sales. The fact is many AA groups in the South Bay choose not to send any money to Central Office. The
decline in contributions has increased over the last few years.
All South Bay Central Office is a necessary and integral part of AA. It supports AA’s primary purpose and
operates within our Traditions. ASBCO needs the financial support of individuals and groups to survive and
continue to provide important services to AA
3
Tradition 5
Alcoholics Anonymous is one
of the greatest spiritual fellowships
no one ever wanted to be a part of.
When I heard my friend Tony S. say
that at a meeting for the first time
I nodded my head in agreement,
there couldn’t be a more accurate
statement. Who would ever think
that a group of drunks like us
would have privilege to be the
caretakers of such a wonderful
fellowship. Thank God for the
traditions, without them A.A.
might have vanished a long time
ago. Bill wrote that these traditions
were “hammered out upon the
anvils of experience”. They are just
as important today as they ever
were.
Tradition 5 in the long form
reads “Each Alcoholics Anonymous
group ought to be a spiritual entity
having but one primary purposethat of carrying its message to the
alcoholic who still suffers.” Bill
in his writings considered this
tradition a matter of life and death
because as he learned early on,
an alcoholic could help another
alcoholic in a way no one else could,
and in turn this would help keep
both individuals sober. The first
four traditions set us up to perform
our sole aim here in tradition 5
and all the rest of the traditions
protect it. The spirit of sacrifice can
be found in all the traditions. Each
one asks us to give something up
for the good of the group. Tradition
five keeps us from trying to do too
much. We cannot be all things to
all people and our alcoholism and
our ongoing recovery are what we
should talk about at our meetings.
People with other issues should
seek out a 12 step fellowship that is
more consistent with their problem.
Tring to fit a square peg In a round
hole could cost somebody their
life. As Bill wrote, “…Alcoholics
Anonymous cannot, it dare not
ever be diverted from its primary
purpose.”
Our meetings should be
a haven for the newcomer not a
social hour for the complacent.
We should remember this when
there is someone new to the group
and do what we can to make them
feel welcomed. The word “carry”
is a verb it is an action just like
everything else in our program and
requires us to be as one member
said “divinely inconvenienced”
at times. If we don’t we miss out
on a tremendous opportunity for
spiritual growth.
I sponsored a man once
who had a sober coach living with
him getting paid to keep him sober,
and he asked if I could come over
one Sunday and talk with him. I
had never really sponsored anyone
before and I had no idea what I
was going to say to him. I asked
my sponsor and he told me to tell
him the truth, “Tell him he’s going
to die” he said. It was a Sunday
afternoon and all I wanted to do is
watch football. I said a little prayer
before I went in and I sat with
him for two hours. He told me his
story and I began to ask him some
question and point out some parts
of the book to him when something
amazing happened. For a moment I
saw the light come on in his eyes. I
came there to do one thing and one
thing only, carry the message. I left
feeling like I was floating because
in that moment I knew there was
a power greater than both of us in
the midst of our little gathering,
and I saw it in his eyes. He said he
couldn’t relate to the sober coach
that was living with him because
he knew he was there to collect
a check. I’d like to think that he
was able to hear something that
day we met because of Tradition 5
and our primary purpose. Martin
drank himself to death not long
after. I remember what an old timer
told me when I was new he said,
“Trust God clean house and help
one alcoholic to achieve sobriety
because the first one that gets the
help is you”
Joe G
4
(continued from page 1)
next assignment was to pray with
this list and consider the following
questions: Am I willing to have my
defects removed? Can he remove
them all? Will he remove them
all? Am I willing to turn over not
only my character defects, but my
beliefs, attitudes, and behavior?
This part took quite a while. I
really had to think about what I
was doing. Finally, I met with my
sponsor to go over everything I had
done in working step 6. As a result,
what I practice and know today
is that when one of my Character
defects pop up I try not to wallow
in it. Instead I stop I pray, call my
sponsor and see what alternate
action I can take. It’s a challenge
and I’m not perfect at it every day,
but I have tools today that I can pick
up to get through any challenge.
My life is amazing and I am going
to keep at it, day by day. Thank
you, AA for my life!
Jenni F.
“Humility
is….
Perpetual quietness of
heart. It is to have no
trouble. It is never to be
fretted or vexed, irritable or
sore; to wonder at nothing
that is done to me, to feel
nothing done against me. It
is to be at rest when nobody
praises me and when I am
blamed or despised, it is
to have a blessed home in
myself where I can go in
and shut the door and pray
to my Father in secret and
be at peace, as in a deep
sea of calmness, when
all around us is seeming
trouble.” ~Inscription on
a plaque Dr Bob kept on his
office desk. (written by T.T.
Carter *unconfirmed*)
(continued from page 1)
drinking I came to you at age
42 completely baffled, hurt and
disappointed that I had been
defeated by life. Early on in my
sobriety I came to the liberating
conclusion that me of myself I am
nothing but a drunk. That was true
then and I believe this to be true
today. I have conceded (embraced
the idea without reservations) to
my innermost self that I am one.
So, what about this inventory
business involved in Step 4? Well, it
turns out that the recovery program
of AA spells out in detail in our
Big Book (which is our textbook)
a series of questions to get to the
core of my problem as an alcoholic.
The key question to me was… what
is the problem for which alcohol
(which is about to kill me) became
a solution?
The Fourth Step asks the
following fundamental questions
about Resentments, Fears and
Sexual Conduct:
Who do I now resent or have
resented and why? Include people,
institutions and principles. If
someone says that they cannot
think anyone at all, they can then
rephrase the question by asking…
Do I know anyone who owes me
an apology? This will drag this list
out.
How do these actions against
me affect me in terms of selfesteem, security, ambition, personal
relations, or sex relations? I found it
incredibly insightful when I had to
define what these concepts meant
to me personally. This revealed to
me my belief system, which turned
out to be based on delusions and
lies.
Then I had to look at this sordid
story from an entirely different
angle and determine in each case
where any of my true character
defects in terms of selfishness,
dishonesty, self-seeking and fear
showed up in relation to the object of
my resentment.
Next I had to identify all my fears
and get to the bottom as to why I
had them. I had to ask the ultimate
question of whether it was true or not
for me that my self-reliance had failed
me. I saw that my human resources
as marshaled by the will had failed
me utterly.
The sex inventory concentrated
on an objective review of conduct
and motives. But at depth it is about
relationships. A sentence I have read
in the 12x12 on page 53 became real
to me… “The primary fact that we fail
to recognize is our total inability to
form a true partnership with another
human being.”
On Step 3 they make the flat
out declaration that selfishness
and self-centeredness is the root of
my troubles, that I am driven by a
hundred forms of fear, self-delusion,
self-seeking, and self-pity. At that
point in the process my question
was… How could this be?
Step 4 became the detailed
process by which they allowed me
to document the facts of my life in all
the critical areas that matter and see
that the facts supported the premise
of Step 3 which is that “… any life run
on self-will can hardly be a success”.
I now have a method of inquiry
about myself that enables me to get to
the bottom of things. The more I see
my humanness through this method
of inquiry the more clearly I see and
experience God. This has been a gift
with no end. Not a bad deal.
(continued from page 1)
came to his house in Redondo
Beach on a Saturday morning I was
full of anxiety.
I will never forget what
happened next during the process
of admitting to myself, to God and
another human being the exact
nature of my wrongs as I could
admit to them back then.
Instead of being judged, I
became fully accepted by another
man who was 5 months ago
a complete stranger. As I was
reading my story he would relate
his own and share his struggles
and recovery. The dark secrets
which would have been buried
with me were shared and in the
light of sharing started the healing
and forgiveness so necessary to
start a spiritual practice and begin
to truly recover. Amazingly I was
no longer lonely, angry, separate
and afraid, and more astonishing
was the fact that I was coming to
an acceptance of myself as a full
human being, warts and all. Now,
I’m compressing what happened
on this page because the reality
is that to this very day I’m still go
through this process of acceptance,
forgiveness and healing and I’m
grateful of it. One last thing over
the next few weeks after taking
my 5th Step the obsession to drink
disappeared! Coincidence?
Anyway, that’s my story and
I’m sticking with it.
Christophe D.
Nick G.
Got a story to tell?
Email it to:
[email protected]
All entries must title their email “Speakeasy”
5
The Club Corner
BBQ & Chili Tasting
Karaoke Night
& Dance
Sat. May 29th 11:00 AM
All American Benefit
Concert & Dance
First and third Fridays
Cost $5.00 SWAC members
$7.00 non-members
Sat. July 16th 7 – 11 PM
Cost: $5
Southwest Alano Club
12130 Birch Avenue
Hawthorne, CA 90250
Torrance Lomita Alano Club
1645 Arlington Avenue
Torrance, CA 90501
(310) 320-3861
Monthly Pancake
Breakfast
SB Alano First Annual
Golf Tournament
Every 3rd Sunday
Monthly Birthday BBQ
October 24, 2016
Los Verdes Country Club
Call Mike McAfee for more info
310-721-8853
EVERYONE WELCOME
Every 4th Sunday
COST: $5.00 club members
$7.00 non-members
San Pedro Alano Club
2001 South Pacific Avenue
San Pedro, CA 90731
(310) 833-3525
South Bay Alano Club
702 11th Place
Hermosa Beach, CA 90254
(310) 374-2131
We’re moving on June 1 to
2116 S. Pacific Ave
6
HONESTY
32nd Annual
South Bay Family
Roundup
September 2-5, 2016
Torrance Marriott South Bay
3635 Fashion Way
Torrance, CA 90503
(310) 316-3636
Call the Roundup Hotline:
(310) 354-7660
For registration and calendar of events:
http://www.southbayroundup.org
Life wasn’t going well for me when I showed up on the scene
But I was ready for the change, whatever that would mean.
The life I’d lead was scandalous I think you get the gist,
And to get rigorously honest, was the first thing on my list.
When practicing this principle I was brutal from the start,
But that sometimes caused reactions, and it wasn’t very smart.
My wife asked me a question, while trying on some jeans
Did they make her look extended? Well, you know what I mean.
That put me in a quandary and, I knew I had to lie,
If life has to be that rigorous, well, I guess I’m gonna die.
I told a friend about it and he said “you got it right”.
Kindness trumps the rigorous clause, and you gotta keep it light.
He gave a definition and for our purpose, I believe
Kind honesty is Devoid of all motives to deceive.
All South Bay Central Office
Family Day Picnic
Chili Cook-Off & Bake Off
When: Sunday, July 31, 2016
Time: 10:00 a.m. – 4:00 p.m.
Where: Wilson Park
2200 Crenshaw Blvd
Torrance, CA
It gives a little wiggle room and, I think God wouldn’t mind
If self-righteousness takes a little hit, if only to be kind.
I’ve learned there are few absolutes, and my conscience is my
guide
And I must put self-honesty first, when, these thing I must decide
Rick R.
East end of Park
(Backside) enter from
Arlington @ Washington
Tickets: $10.00 Presale
$12.00 at the door
Call Central Office @
310-618-1180
Go paperless
get the Speakeasy
online at:
www.southbayaa.org
Chili, hot dogs, burgers, ice cream, fruit
bowls and fun family activities
7
If you would like to be a phone
volunteer or alternate please call
ASBCO: 310.618.1180
(
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How can you tell the difference
between a moderate drinker, a
heavy drinker and an alkie?
A moderate drinker goes in the
bar, orders a drink and goes to the
bathroom. He comes out and there
is a fly in his drink. He pushes the
drink back to the bartender and
orders another.
A heavy drinker goes in the
bar, orders a drink and goes to the
bathroom. He comes out and there
is a fly in his drink. He picks the fly
out of the drink and drinks his drink.
An alkie goes in the bar, orders a
drink and goes to the bathroom. He
comes out and there is a fly in his
drink. He picks the fly up and tells
him to spit it out, SPIT IT OUT!!!
Only a Dream for a
Drunk
Brenda O’Malley is home making
dinner, as usual, when Tim Finnegan
arrives at her door.
‘Brenda, may I come in?’ he asks.
‘I’ve somethin’ to tell ya’.
‘Of course you can come in, you’re
always welcome, Tim. But where’s
my husband?’
‘That’s what I’m here to be telling
ya, Brenda. There was an accident
down at the Guinness brewery’
‘Oh, God no!’ cries Brenda. ‘Please
don’t tell me.’
‘I must, Brenda. Your husband
Shamus is dead and gone. I’m sorry.
Finally, she looked up at Tim.
‘How did it happen,Tim?’
‘It was terrible, Brenda. He fell
into a vat of Guinness Stout, and
drowned.’
‘Oh my dear Lord! But you must
tell me true, Tim, did he at least go
quickly?’
‘Well, Brenda, no. In fact, he got
out three times to pee.’
Line em up
A bloke goes into a pub, takes a
seat at the bar, and orders five pints.
The barman gives him an odd look
since the bloke’s all by himself,
but he serves up the five pints and
lines them up on the bar. The bloke
downs them....One, Two, Three,
Four, Five. He finishes the last one
and calls to the barman, “Four pints,
please, mate!” The barman serves
up four pints and lines them on the
bar. The bloke downs them....One,
Two, Three, Four. Then he belches
loudly, sways slightly on the stool,
and orders three more pints. And
one after the other, he knocks them
back.... One, Two, Three. “Two pints,
mate!” he calls, and the barman
places two pints in front of him.
Down they go.... One, Two. As the
bloke slams the last one down on the
bar, he says, “One pint, mate.” So
the barman fills the glass. The bloke
sits there, staring at it for a moment,
trying to focus. Then he looks at the
barman and says, “Y’know, it’sh a
funny t’ing, but the less I drink, the
drunker I get.”
8
Hard Work
Fed up with her husband’ coming
home drunk every night, late one
evening the wife drove her husband
up the mountain to an overlook where
they could see the local liquor factory in
full swing below. Lights were flashing,
machines were roaring, and trucks
were pulling in and out.
“See!“.... the wife said pointedly
to her spouse. “They can make if faster
than you can drink it”
“Yes!“... he replied, “But you
have to admit, I’ve got ‘em working
nights to keep up”.