Conflict Resolution
We need to live in peace with one another. The goal of conflict resolution is unity. Unity poses a threat to the devil who
will use every opportunity to take advantage of unresolved issues, especially those involving anger, bitterness, self-pity
and envy. Scripture tells us that we’re to
“let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor and slander be put away from [us], along with all malice” (Ephesians
4:31). Failure to do this results in division in the body of Christ and grief to the Holy Spirit.
“
See to it that no one falls short of the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many”
(Hebrews 12:15). Clearly, a biblical method of conflict resolution is needed.
Every letter in the New Testament contains at least one command to believers to live at peace with one another. We are
repeatedly instructed to love one another (John 13:34; Romans 12:10), to live in peace and harmony with one another
(Romans 15:5; Hebrews 12:14), to settle our differences among ourselves (2 Corinthians 13:11), to be patient, kind and
tenderhearted toward one another (1 Corinthians 13:4), to consider others before ourselves (Philippians 2:3), to bear
one another’s burdens (Ephesians 4:2), and to rejoice in the truth (1 Corinthians 13:6). Conflict is the antithesis of
Christian behavior as outlined in Scripture.
In
18:15-17, Jesus gives the steps for dealing with a sinning brother. According to this passage, in the event of
conflict involving overt sin, we are to address it one-on-one first, then if still unresolved it should be taken to a small
group, and finally before the whole church if the problem still remains. This passage tells us the steps we need to take
or the chain of command that we need to follow when dealing with conflict.
Matthew 18:15-17 "If your brother sins, go and show him his fault in private; if he listens to you, you have won your brother. "But if he
does not listen to you, take one or two more with you, so that BY THE MOUTH OF TWO OR THREE WITNESSES EVERY FACT MAY BE
CONFIRMED. "If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to listen even to the church, let him be to you as a
Gentile and a tax collector.
is Luke 17:3-4, Jesus says, “Pay attention to yourselves! If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him,
and if he sins against you seven times in the day, and turns to you seven times, saying, 'I repent,' you must forgive him."
An essential part of conflict resolution, according to this passage, is forgiveness. Any kind of disciplinary procedure
should always have restoration of the sinning person as the ultimate goal.
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Luke 17:3-4 So watch yourselves.“If your brother or sister sins against you, rebuke them; and if they repent, forgive them. Even if
they sin against you seven times in a day and seven times come back to you saying ‘I repent,’ you must forgive them.”
The reason conflict resolution is so difficult is that we’re hesitant to place ourselves in uncomfortable situations. We’re
also frequently unwilling to humble ourselves enough to admit that we might be wrong or to do what it might take to
make amends if we are wrong. This is such an important issue to God that peace with Him and peace with others are
mutually exclusive. We cannot know peace with God unless we are at peace with one another, and we cannot truly
know peace with others unless we are at peace with God. The reason conflict resolution is so difficult is that we’re
hesitant to place ourselves in uncomfortable situations. We’re also frequently unwilling to humble ourselves enough to
admit that we might be wrong or to do what it might take to make amends if we are wrong.
From : http://www.gotquestions.org/conflict-resolution.html#ixzz3IhGlTJvl
To summarize, whether someone wrongs you or you have wronged someone, you need to make it right. Don’t let it
fester, don’t let it build. The problem needs exposed. This opens up the door to forgiveness which in turn leads to peace
and unity among men. This pleases God and he is glorified through this.
Bible Verse References on Conflict Resolution
Matthew 18:15-17 "If your brother sins, go and show him his fault in private; if he listens to you, you have won your
brother. "But if he does not listen to you, take one or two more with you, so that BY THE MOUTH OF TWO OR THREE
WITNESSES EVERY FACT MAY BE CONFIRMED. "If he refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church; and if he refuses to
listen even to the church, let him be to you as a Gentile and a tax collector.
Proverbs 12:18 There is one who speaks rashly like the thrusts of a sword, But the tongue of the wise brings healing.
1 Corinthians 13:4-7 Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not
act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not
rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; …………
James 1:19-20 This you know, my beloved brethren But everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger;
for the anger of man does not achieve the righteousness of God.
Ephesians 4:29 Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification
according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear.
1 Peter 3:8-11 To sum up, all of you be harmonious, sympathetic, brotherly, kindhearted, and humble in spirit; not
returning evil for evil or insult for insult, but giving a blessing instead; for you were called for the very purpose that you
might inherit a blessing. For, "THE ONE WHO DESIRES LIFE, TO LOVE AND SEE GOOD DAYS, MUST KEEP HIS TONGUE
FROM EVIL AND HIS LIPS FROM SPEAKING DECEIT. ……..
Matthew 5:38-42 "You have heard that it was said, 'AN EYE FOR AN EYE, AND A TOOTH FOR A TOOTH.' "But I say to you,
do not resist an evil person; but whoever slaps you on your right cheek, turn the other to him also. "If anyone wants to sue
you and take your shirt, let him have your coat also……
Proverbs 15:1 A gentle answer turns away wrath, But a harsh word stirs up anger.
Ephesians 4:26 BE ANGRY, AND yet DO NOT SIN; do not let the sun go down on your anger,
James 1:19 This you know, my beloved brethren But everyone must be quick to hear, slow to speak and slow to anger;
Romans 12:17-21 Never pay back evil for evil to anyone Respect what is right in the sight of all men. If possible, so far as
it depends on you, be at peace with all men. Never take your own revenge, beloved, but leave room for the wrath of God,
for it is written, "VENGEANCE IS MINE, I WILL REPAY," says the Lord.
Matthew 5:9 "Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons of God.
Luke 17:3 "Be on your guard! If your brother sins, rebuke him; and if he repents, forgive him.
Philippians 2:4 do not merely look out for your own personal interests, but also for the interests of others.
Proverbs 16:7 When a man's ways are pleasing to the LORD, He makes even his enemies to be at peace with him.
Colossians 3:13 bearing with one another, and forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the
Lord forgave you, so also should you.
Leviticus 19:18 'You shall not take vengeance, nor bear any grudge against the sons of your people, but you shall love
your neighbor as yourself; I am the LORD.
Hebrews 12:15 See to it that no one comes short of the grace of God; that no root of bitterness springing up causes
trouble, and by it many be defiled;
John 13:34 "A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another, even as I have loved you, that you also love
one another.
From : http://bible.knowing-jesus.com/topics/Conflict-Resolution#sthash.YdV6JPiG.dpuf