Danielle Smith
Writing 1310/1720
“Every rose has its thorn.”
Mrs. Cokey Allen
18 September, 2006
Through the Glass
“And when the worrying starts to hurt
and the world feels like graves of dirt
Just close your eyes until
you can imagine this place, you're our secret space at will…”
--- Shut your eyes by Snow Patrol
Birth and Early Childhood
I was born at the Doctor’s Hospital in Little Rock, Arkansas, on August 1, 1988. I
was the first born to Benita Kay Zumo, and have been a pain in her neck ever since.
Starting out it was just me and my mom. My “sperm donor”, as I like to call him, left my
mom during pregnancy and hasn’t been back since.
“Hey, remember me,
I remember you walking away.”
---Walking Away by Lifehouse
When I was about two, my mom met Richard Allen Smith, the man who I call
dad. Soon after they wed he adopted me as his own. He has always treated me as his
daughter and not Kyle’s (sperm donor). There’s one thing that will always be in the back
of my brain when I think about my dad. When I was younger, I was really bad about
going to sleep and hated to be alone. I would want someone to talk or read to me until I
fell asleep. My dad would diligently do that every night even though he had to get up
early the next morning. No matter how long it took for me to finally fall asleep, he would
be there.
“Daddy's little girl paints the world with her magic wand
Daddy's little child breathes new life to the morning time for me…
Nothing's wrong when Molly smiles.”
--- Molly Smiles by Jesse Spencer
When I was about four years old, my mom got pregnant with my little sister.
From what I hear I wasn’t too excited about the pregnancy because I did not want to
share the attention I got. She ended up growing on me though and I guess perhaps now
I can stand her. I’m just playing, she means a lot to me and we have gotten closer now
that shes getting older. She’s now in ninth grade and is starting to date, as a result, I’m
constantly worried and can’t wait to meet all her future boyfriends so I can scare the
snot out of them. ☺
“Time, where did you go?
Why did you leave me here alone?
Wait, don't go so fast
I'm missing the moments as they pass”
Education
“Now please don't pretend to know what's on my mind
If we already knew everything that everybody knows
We would have nothing to learn tonight
And we would have nothing to show tonight
Oh but everybody thinks
That everybody knows
About everybody else
Nobody knows
Anything about themselves
Cause their all worried about everybody else.”
--- Wasting Time by Jack Johnson
For staying in the tri-city area my whole life, I sure did switch schools often. I
went to pre-school in Benton at Children’s Corner. I loved that place and even though I
can’t describe it, I have its distinct smell still stuck in my head. In kindergarten and first
grade I went to a small private school called Cloverdale Christian Academy. In second
grade my parents decided to move me to another Christian private school, Walnut
Valley Christian Academy (a.k.a. Little Rock Christian Academy). Third grade soon rolls
around and yet I move again to Agape Academy, a small private school associated with
the church we were going to at that time. I stayed at Agape Academy until seventh
grade when I moved back to Walnut Valley (now known as Little Rock Christian
Academy or LRCA). There I stayed until the end of my tenth grade year when I decided
to go to Little Rock Central High School. Moving to a different school this time was
actually my decision and it was primarily based on what I thought was right for me. I felt
that Central had more to offer me both as a student and a person. I had grown up in a
private school my whole life and it was time to branch out.
“I try to make my way to you, but still I feel so lost.”
Take Me Away; Lifehouse
“We try so hard, cause we don’t know what we’re looking for.”
--- Happy by Socialburn
Hobbies
“You're a summer time hottie with her socks in the air
screaming I don't care baby I don't care”
--- Wounded by Third Eye Blind
Growing up, I was involved in all kinds of sports: Powder-puff football, basketball,
softball, volleyball, swimming, slaloming, and wakeboarding, which I had become
particularly fond of. However, recently I was involved in an accident that has rendered
me from being able to participate in any sports whatsoever. The lake is one of my
favorite places to be. It’s so serene and when I am there I see the beauty in the world
that sometimes goes unnoticed. Art is as well a major part of my life. Painting is a way
for me to escape into Danielle’s Surreal World. Since I am not really able to participate
in sports, I use painting as a stress reliever. Another way I use painting is to voice my
feelings without words. I don’t tend to voice my opinions unless asked thus I use
painting as a way to say what I feel without having to voice it. I view every piece of art
this way and when admiring others work I often try to think what the were thinking and
feeling. Dancing is something I do for fun. I never took extensive classes in any kind of
dance. I just love to sing and dance around while hanging out, getting ready, mostly at
any time, any place.
“Cause everyone is looking
and everyone is laughing but I think
everyone feels the same.
Everybody wants to feel ok.”
--- Quasimodo by Lifehouse
Music
“Music is my aeroplane
It's my aeroplane
Songbird sweet and sour Jane
It's my aeroplane”
--- Aeroplane by Red Hot Chili Peppers
You are probably wondering what all the italicized words are in quotation marks. They
are outtakes I took out of some of my favorite songs that describe my personality, certain aspects
of my life, or certain memories I have. I don’t consider music a hobby because I don’t play an
instrument; it’s in its own category. Just as I use painting as a way to express myself, I use music
in the same way. Saying music is my life would sound to cliché and I would hate to say that
when I don’t plan on pursuing any sort of music career. I merely use it as an emotional release. It
helps me relax and depending on my mood, depends on my music. I use it to define me and who
I am so obviously it’s a key facet of my life.
“Gotta find a way to flow
in a host of things that grow,
where babies become old
and love is bought and sold.
The mouth of God is wide,
so let's just fall inside
and let the whole thing go
and flow...”
--- Flow by Live
“Rock on baby, Rock on, you Rock on.”
Eleventh Grade Year
This school year gets its own section because it is the most predominant year in
my life so far. Eleventh grade was absolutely off the chain. I was in a new school, which
had so much to offer, and so many new people that I could meet, it was overwhelming.
Most of the people from LRCA said I would be back by the end of the first semester, but
my best friend Sydney knew how much I disliked and wanted to leave that school and I
would never look back. At Central I hung out with two girls all year, all the time, Audrey
Goodwin and Sydney Omar. A lot of people called us the three stooges. We had a blast
all the time no matter where we were or what we were doing. I wish I could say that we
never got into any trouble but that would be a lie, we were born to be wild.
Don’t think that all we did was party and goof off, I maintained two jobs, one at
Shakey’s Frozen Custard and the other at Brick Oven Pizza, while keeping up my
G.P.A. Sadly the year was near its end and before finals started Audrey, Sydney, our
good friend Kelsey Gadberry, and I all headed up to Memphis, Tennessee for the Beale
Street Music Festival. It was a spectacular weekend and Jack Johnson shook my hand
(he’s one of my favorite solo artist.)
“When you move like a jellyfish
Rhythm don't mean nothing
You go with the flow
You don't stop
Move like a jellyfish
Rhythm is nothing
You go with the flow
You don't stop.”
--- Bubble Toes by Jack Johnson
All we were talking about the next week at school was that weekend and at
lunch, we would laugh over every funny little thing that had happened. The week flew by
fast and Thursday after we had gotten back my boyfriend and I broke up. The next day
we were all at lunch deciding on what to do this weekend. I had to work mostly all
weekend but of course I was going to fit in some time to “kick it.”
“But nights like this it seems are slowly fleeting
They disappear as reality is crashing to the floor.”
--- Blind by Lifehouse
My friend Sarah was having a small party at her house and there were people out
camping. The three stooges decided to do both. I didn’t get of work that night until
12:30, so immediately when I got off we headed to Sarah’s. Sarah’s was ok but Sydney
and I decided we wanted to head out camping; I had volunteered to be the D.D for the
night so I was safe to drive. Camping was fun but I ended up falling asleep sometime
between three and four. Soon I awoke to Sydney telling me it was time to go. We said
our goodbyes and headed down the road. The next thing I remember was waking up 4
days later in ICU with loads of pain. My mom informed me that I had been involved in a
head on collision with an F-150 pulling a boat. I started to freak out and wonder if
Sydney was alright, they told me she was but I really didn’t believe them at this point. I
wanted up and I wanted to see her but I couldn’t move.
“The God of Wine comes crashing through the headlights of a car
that, took you farther than you thought you'd ever want to go,
We can't get back again, We can't get back again… And the siren's song that is your
madness, Holds a truth I can't erase, All alone on your face.”
--- God of Wine by Third Eye Blind
I had broken my neck, my right humorous, my left wrist, ruptured my spleen, punctured
my lung, shattered my ankle in oblivion, broke both my right lower leg bones, and would
find out a couple weeks later that I had paralyzed my left arm. Luckily, there was no one
with very serious injuries besides me. I had been pronounced dead three times and in
fact on the air flight over to the hospital a crew member said that he wouldn’t count on
me making it to the hospital and he said right after he said that I said, “Just watch me.” I
was in the hospital for over two months. I consider this a life changing experience in
every aspect of my life.
“And the bruises that you feel will heal
And I hope you'll come around
Cause we're missing you…”
Significant Relationships
~God~
“Everything in the world was falling through
all I knew was to look to you”
--- Wash by Lifehouse
“You know where I have been,
and I don’t want to go there again.
Where do I go from here?
I guess I’ll find out as I go.”
--- Empty Space by Lifehouse
As I said earlier I was brought up in a Christian environment my whole life. I was
blessed to be able to arrive at home everyday to a “Spirit-filled” or “God-filled” home. My
view concerning religion however is simply this; I don’t think that one should focus on
Religion or I guess the Church and its means by which members serve but rather one’s
self relationship with God. I believe that God doesn’t care how or where you do it as
long as you do it. I think people get too caught up in talking the talk and they loose sight
of walking the walk. My view of God is a very down to earth person/being, accepting
everyone as they are. My relationship with God, however, had dwindled along with my
relationship with all my family members. When God puts his foot down he really puts it
down and I ran into it head on. He knew my life had to change and if I wasn’t going to
do it, he was giving me a jumpstart; or at least a glimpse into reality.
“Cause I would take a bullet for you…
I would loose it all, take my fall, to show you it's for real”
--- Bullet by Mat Kearney
“These days, a little bit longer than the last
And all of your ways, a little bit stronger than the past
And your light, found my bottle in the night
Kept me in this fight, gave me second life”
Wont Back Down – Mat Kearney
~Mom~
I consider my mom one of my best friend’s. I can talk to her about literally
everything. We can hang out as friends but at the same time having that motherdaughter bond where I look up to her. I doubt that I would have made it threw recovery
as well as I did if it wasn’t for her. She’s been my stronghold when my Spirit gets week
she will help me refresh and revive so that I do keep a strong relationship with the Lord.
“Well mama said
It's just make believe
You can't believe everything you see
So baby close your eyes to the lullabies
On the news tonight…Mama said
It's just make believe
You cant believe everything you see
So baby close your eyes to the lullabies
On the news tonight”
---The News, jack Johnson
~My Two Closest Friends~
“Friend of mine stay alive
Don’t you leave me here
All alone in the world with a chronic tear
I will always be here, I will always be here
I will always be here for you”
-- Friend of mine; Eve6
“You know I cant be like everybody,Cause I cant tell you what you want to hear. I don’t
know if I can make it better. All I know is I’ll be around.” --- Undone by Lifehouse
I have two really close friends who I have been close with since the ninth grade, Sydney
Whitfield and Nathan Noble. Sydney and I have been through a lot together and she
knows more about me than a lot of other people know. I remember seeing her for the
first time when I was in ICU after my accident. I felt as if everything was going to be
alright now that Sydney was there and that she would take care of me. Now Nathan,
he’s very special to me. Half the time I seriously wonder if he’s my soul mate. We get
each other and I remember hearing about how scared he was when he found out I had
been in an accident and he drove up here immediately even though he lives two hours
away. He has been there with me through good and bad times and is still there. These
two people are two that I can depend on, and I don’t know what I’d do if anything ever
happen to either one of these amazing people. They both mean so much to me and
have helped me through all sorts of trials that have passed my way.
“I'll be there for you,
You don't have to be alone with what you're going through”
--- Come Back Down by Lifehouse
“Cause all I want to do is be there For the things that you're going through.
Well is it good for you,
Is it good for you?
Cause you haunt my nights when I don't know where my life should go,
Well is it good for you?
Is it good for you?”
--- Good for You by Third eye Blind
I consider these four people to be my closest friends and counselors. When I’m down
they’ll lift me up.
Further Information
“Choose not a life of imitation,
distant cousin to the reservation.”
-- Can’t Stop by Red Hot Chili Peppers
I consider myself to be an outgoing person. I view myself as having an openmind in every situation and I am defiantly an optimist. Some say it’s a flaw but I think I
live a happy life because of it. Speaking politically I am a Libertarian and concerning the
subject of religion I am Non – Denominational. I am defiantly an outdoors girl; I was
practically raised at the lake. I don’t believe I am a judgmental person and I try my
hardest not to be. My top two pet peeves would have to be hypocrites and someone
biting their nails; both are horrible habits. I like to hang out with my friends and I am the
type of person that can make any situation fun. I have been told I am a good listener. I
don’t know first hand because it’s a little hard to talk and listen to myself at the same
time. ☺ I haven’t fully decided what I want to do with the rest of my life. However, I do
know the general direction in which I’m headed. I’m deciding whether to be a talent
agent or a public relations representative, either way, before I die I will not only own my
own modeling agency but I will have a wakeboarding camp aimed at teenagers along
with my own traveling team. I am a very determined person and I know I can
accomplish anything I set my mind too. It’s been a hard couple of years but things can
only get better.
“What you do
No one can decide it's up to you
And who you are is what you choose
These times when the world falls apart
Make us who we are”
--- The End has Only Begun by Lifehouse