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A HAPPY MARRIAGE
On their 50th wedding anniversary, a couple summed
up the reason for their long and happy marriage.
The husband said, "I have tried never to be selfish. After all, there is no 'I' in the word 'marriage.'''
The wife said, "I never correct my husband's spelling."
WINTER HOUSE
We purchased an old home in Northern New York State from two
elderly sisters. Winter was fast approaching and I was concerned
about the house's lack of insulation. "If they could live here all
those years, so can we!" my husband confidently declared.
One November night the temperature plunged to below
zero, and we woke up to find interior walls covered
with frost. My husband called the sisters to ask how
they had kept the house warm. After a rather brief
conversation, he hung up. "For the past 30 years,"
he muttered, "they've gone to Arizona for the winter."
COW ON THE TRACK
A passenger train is creeping along, slowly. Finally it creaks to a
halt. A passenger sees a conductor walking by outside. "What's
going on?" she yells out the window.
"Cow on the track!" replies the conductor. Ten
minutes later, the train resumes its slow pace. Within
five minutes, however, it stops again. The woman
sees the same conductor walk again.
She leans out the window and yells, "What happened? Did we catch up with the cow again?"
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WHEN YOU’RE THIRTY YOU’RE OLD ENOUGH TO KNOW BETTER BUT STILL YOUNG ENOUGH TO DO IT ANYWAY
80% OF SUCCESS IS JUST SHOWING UP
I AM THANKFUL FOR LAUGHTER, EXCEPT WHEN IT MAKES MILK COME OUT OF MY NOSE
PEOPLE WHO NEVER GET CARRIED AWAY SHOULD BE
EVEN IF THERE IS NOTHING TO LAUGH ABOUT, LAUGH ON CREDIT
IF YOU’VE GOT IT FLAUNT IT; IF YOU DONT, PRETEND YOU DO AND WALK FAST AND ACT CONFIDENT
HAPPINESS IS NOT A GOAL. IT IS A BY-PRODUCT
GOD WRITES A LOT OF COMEDY; HE’S JUST STUCK WITH A BUNCH OF BAD ACTORS WHO DON’T APPRECIATE HIS HUMOR
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS FRIENDLIER THAN A WET DOG
¥ On July 24, 1567, during her imprisonment at
Lochleven Castle in Scotland, Mary Queen of
Scots is forced to abdicate in favor of her 1year-old son, later crowned King James
VI of Scotland. In 1542, while just 6 days
old, Mary had ascended to the Scottish
throne upon the death of her father, King
James V.
¥ On July 22, 1862, President Abraham Lincoln informs his
chief advisers and cabinet that he will issue a proclamation to
free slaves, but that he will wait until the Union Army has
achieved a substantial military victory. The Emancipation
Proclamation had less to do with ending slavery than saving
the crumbling union.
¥ On July 25, 1978, Louise Joy Brown, the
world's first baby to be conceived via in
vitro fertilization, is born in Manchester,
England. In December 2006, Louise gave
birth to a boy, Cameron John Mullinder,
who was conceived naturally.
THE FASTEST ANIMAL ON EARTH, WITH A TOP SPEED OF
120 FEET PER SECOND, IS A COW THAT HAS BEEN DROPPED OUT OF A HELICOPTER.
¥ On July 23, 1918, Della Sorenson kills the first of
her seven victims in Nebraska. Over the next seven
years, friends, relatives and acquaintances of
Sorenson died under mysterious circumstances. In 1925, Sorenson was arrested when she made an unsuccessful
attempt at killing two children with poisoned cookies.
¥ On July 28, 1929, President John F. Kennedy's wife,
Jacqueline Bouvier Kennedy, is born into a prominent New
York family. In 1951, she began her first job as the Washington Times-Herald's "Inquiring Camera Girl," roaming the
streets of Washington, D.C., asking "man on the street" questions.
¥ On July 26, 1943, Rolling
Stones frontman Mick Jagger is
born in Dartford, Kent, England.
Michael Philip Jagger attended
the London School of Economics,
but left without graduating in
order to pursue a career in music.
¥ On July 27, 1996, in Atlanta, the XXVI Summer Olympiad
is disrupted by the explosion of a nail-laden pipe bomb in
Centennial Olympic Park. The bombing killed one and injured more than 100 others. Police were warned of the bombing in advance, but the bomb exploded before the anonymous
caller said it would.
SEE ARTICLE BELOW FOR HELPFUL INFO CONCERNING IDENTITY
The identity theft prevention industry has long been defined by its
habits of over promising and under delivering. A product may make
an exaggerated claim that no reasonable person would expect to
hold true. The reality is many identity theft companies have claims
that confuse consumers. Now, thanks in large part to a campaign
from the Consumer Federation of America, the industry is working
to clean up its act. Listed below are few of the highlights of what
has or is being corrected with the help of the CFA:
LifeLock’s Internet Scanning feature no longer makes the claim
that it “helps stop thieves before they have a chance to commit
fraud.” As awesome as that would be, the reality is that your personal information likely has been widely disseminated—it’s in the
hands of your employer, governments, your bank, your credit cards,
your health insurer, etc. The only way an observer could tell whether someone who’s in possession of your information is also someone who should have it, is my seeing how it is used.
AllCLear ID modified it’s “100 percent success rate” claim to indicate that’s its success is specifically in resolving financial identity
theft cases. That’s an important distinction as non financial identity
theft can include can include things like stealing ones identity for
employment or medical treatment by posing as someone else, or by
criminals attempting to throw law enforcement off their trail.
Intersection’s Identity Guard stopped claiming that “the entire
spectrum of your private information is protected” and instead added more details about the specific services it provides. Once again,
it’s clear acknowledgement that identity theft can be a complicated
mess that can reach well beyond what any monitoring and recovery
service can help you clean up.
Don’t Just Insure, Protect - As nice as the clean up assist may be
from any of those protection companies, it’s better to avoid becoming a victim of identity theft in the first place. While your personal
information is already in too many hands for you to be completely
in control of whether it gets into the hands of an identity thief, there
are proactive methods you can use to reduce your risk.
Secure your paper trail: Keep your financial and medical records
in a secure place, such as a fire proof safe. When it’s time to dispose
of old records that contain your personal data, shred them using a
cross-cut shredder, Adding difficulty to piecing those documents
back together.
Don’t disclose your ID to those that call you: If you receive a
phone call asking for your social security number, get a call back
number and then verify that it’s legitimate by calling the main office
This number is on your paperwork or Google the company name.
Regularly check your credit report: You can obtain a free annual
credit report from each of the three credit bureaus to see if anyone
has opened an account using your info. Check your bank and credit
card statements and contact your bank if something is amiss. While
the major identity protection companies can help, none of them offer failsafe systems to prevent your identity from being stolen. Be
vigilant in monitoring and protecting your identity, on your own or
with the help of an ID protection company.
How Safe Is Your Identity? From: dailyfinance.com Identity Theft protection: Separating Hype from the Real By: Chuck Saletta
WE ONLY DO WELL THE THINGS WE LIKE DOING
HOME IS WHERE TEENAGERS GO TO REFUEL
TEMPTATION EXERCISES OUR FAITH AND TEACHES US TO PRAY
FAITH IS THE SILVER THREAD UPON WHICH THE PEARLS OF GRACE ARE HUNG
9. ART: What artist painted the work titled "Water Lillies"?
10. MUSIC: Who recorded and released the hit song
"Maybellene" in 1955?
(c) 2013 King Features Synd., Inc.
6. Rhoda
7. Berlin
8. Australia
9. Claude Monet
10. Chuck Berry
DON’T BE SO HUMBLE; YOU’RE NOT THAT GREAT
5. LANGUAGE: What is a quidnunc?
6. TELEVISION: Who is Mary's best friend and neighbor in
"The Mary Tyler Moore Show"?
7. HISTORY: Which city hosted the 1936 Summer Olympics?
8. FLAGS: What nation's flag features a Union Jack and a
seven-point star on a blue background?
Answers
1. Canada
2. Ballet
3. Seven
4. Lima
5. Busybody
A LITTLE HELP IS WORTH A GREAT DEAL OF PITY
1. GEOGRAPHY: What is the largest country in area that
borders on only one other country?
2. MOVIES: What art is featured in the movie "The Red
Shoes"?
3. GAMES: How many letters are drawn to begin a game of
"Scrabble"?
4. FOOD: What kind of bean is usually featured in the dish
succotash?
WHEN I FIRST SAW YOU I FELL IN LOVE WITH YOUR SMILE...AND YOU WERE SMILING BECAUSE YOU KNEW I LOVED YOU
IF CATS COULD TALK THEY WOULDN’T
YOU’RE MIDDLE-AGED WHEN ALL YOU EXERCISE IS CAUTION
BREEDING RABBITS IS A HARE RAISING EXPERIENCE
GOD IS SELDOM EARLY BUT NEVER LATE
WHAT WE LOVE TO DO WE FIND TIME TO DO
¥ In 1977, Ken Olson, president, chairman and
founder of Digital Equipment Company,
made the following regrettable statement:
"There is no reason anyone would want a
computer in their home."
¥ Gross fact of the day: Half of the bacteria in the human mouth
haven't even been identified yet by science.
¥ The drug Ivermectin is a broad-spectrum antiparasitic, used
mainly to treat infestations of worms. The people who
have been helped by this medication might be surprised to learn that the drug was developed through
research spurred by a fungus found growing on the
golf shoe of a botanist.
I’VE GOT ALL THE MONEY I’LL EVER NEED; IF I DIE BY 5PM
¥ If you're a centenarian, you might want to consider
moving to New Mexico. In that state, there is a law
declaring that everyone 100 and older is tax-exempt.
¥ Unless you were around on April 17, 1964, you may not be
aware of the hullabaloo caused by the introduction of the Mustang. In Seattle, a truck driver was so distracted by a display of
new Mustangs that he crashed his cement truck through the
window of the dealership. In Chicago, so many people were
trying to crowd into the cars in a showroom that the dealer had
to lock all the vehicle doors. A dealer in New Jersey had only
one Mustang, so he auctioned it off. The winner of the auction
insisted on sleeping in his new car that night, just to
make sure nobody else got it before his check
cleared.
¥ Arizonans take note: Hunting camels is
illegal in your state.
¥ If you're like the hypothetical average
person, your mouth will create 10,000
gallons of saliva over the course of your
lifetime.
***
Thought for the Day: "A pint of sweat saves a gallon of blood."
-- General George S. Patton
(c) 2013 King Features Synd., Inc.
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