flying solo with adhd

FLYING SOLO WITH ADHD
E-book by Judy A. MacNamee
I. INTRODUCTION and OUTLINE:
“Flying Solo with ADHD” is my goal for all those struggling with ADHD. This e-book was compiled to
provide steps in empowerment, which then can be transferred into self-confidence and ultimately selfmanagement. Ties to parents’ Executive Functions become stronger and stronger the longer the child
goes without skills such as, self-advocacy and it becomes harder for both parent and child to break away.
I offer this topic multiple times throughout the year in webinars and it is geared to both teens and
parents. I provide steps within a framework and suggestions on how to modify one’s approach in order
to make positive gains. There is no manual for raising an ADHD child. There is also no way one can
determine how ADHD will present itself in certain situations and within certain environments, especially
with the teen years and the hormones partnering right along with the ADHD. Therefore, regard this as a
framework or a guide. There is also no set age group. I work with teens beginning around the age of 12
but depending on each and every child and each and every ADHD brain, will best determine at what age
modifications can be effective.
You, as a parent, know your child better than I, but there are some fundamentals and common threads
that run throughout this e-book that provide a centerpiece from which you can branch off in different
directions to empower your child. You are still the parent; which makes your job even more difficult! It
also takes a little work in stepping back, swallowing your pride and being open to suggestions from
outside your world.
II. DISCOVER
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
How DSM Changes Your World
The Challenges
#4 Keys in Problem Solving Process
Those Scary Behaviors!
THE number #1 skill your child needs to transition to success
II. YOU ARE HERE BECAUSE...the following are just some reasons parents, like you share with me.
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Exhausted trying to just hold it together
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The “helicopter mom” and can’t seem to change it!
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Find you have little or NO time for YOU!
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Feelings of inadequacy
And Is Your Child continues to:
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Struggling in school
All rights and copyright permission held by ADHD CoachConnect LLC 2015
www.adhdcoachconnect
FLYING SOLO WITH ADHD
E-book by Judy A. MacNamee
▪
Be forgetful
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Not be motivated
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Not complete simple chores
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Be totally disorganized
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Start to become defiant
I applaud you for all you do and thank you for downloading this e-book. Let’s get started!
1.
How DSM Changes Your World-DSM stands for the Diagnostic Statistical Manual and is the
governing body of the American Psychology Association. Its importance is understanding the
changes surrounding ADHD. Here are the highlights!
•
Neurodevelopmental Behaviors-ADHD is no longer classified as Behavioral but as a
Neurodevelopmental Behavior.
•
Changes in symptoms-Parents need to know the classifications and how the symptoms
are written; here is a good resource to read: http://psychcentral.com/dsm-5/
2. The Challenges
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There are many challenges facing both the ADHD teen and the parent
At risk behaviors
Parents who are also struggling
Forgetting (yes, forgetting) when parenting that this unique brain can’t always do it all!
Ignorance in the world
Continuance of the stigma of behavioral as the basis
Education systems that are archaic and are built for the non-ADHD brain
Length of time it takes to diagnose and get support docs (IEP/504) into place
Entering college or the world without the skills needed
3. #4 Keys in Problem Solving Process

#1 Key in Problem Solving Process-Understanding ADHD
o ADHD is situational
o ADHD is unique to each
o Executive Function Growth delay
o Co-existing problems/LD
o sleep
o anxiety
o depression
All rights and copyright permission held by ADHD CoachConnect LLC 2015
www.adhdcoachconnect
FLYING SOLO WITH ADHD
E-book by Judy A. MacNamee
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Key #2 Adapt the
Environment
o Make rewards for good behavior much easier to earn than punishment for bad
behavior.
o Have a points charts-visual/kinesthetic
o Don’t remove for bad behavior
o Age dependent: Play time with a friend up to “out with a friend”
o Novelty wears off so must be massaged constantly
o No delayed gratification- they live in the here and NOW!
Key #3 Teach and Apply
o Baby steps
o Be an active part
o Model the behavior you want
o Act, don’t react
Key #4 Make the child an active partner
o Collaborate with your child
o Find out how both of you can do positive behaviors to achieve the goals you both
want
o Keep calm through the bumps; work together to eliminate the frustration,
screaming, etc.
4. The Skills Your Child Needs for Success
 #1 Self-Care Skills
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Wash/care for clothes
Manage money-savings, checking, credit cards
Wake, dress and out the door on time
Send self to bed at reasonable time
 #2 Academic Skills
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Review class notes, assigned readings
Use school resources for understanding
Know how to motivate when in difficult assignments
Studying for tests and quizzes
 #3 SELF ADVOCACY! THE #1 SKILL YOUR CHILD NEEDS FOR SUCCESS!
o
o
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Ability to speak up for themselves
Make their own life decisions
Know their rights and responsibilities
All rights and copyright permission held by ADHD CoachConnect LLC 2015
www.adhdcoachconnect
FLYING SOLO WITH ADHD
E-book by Judy A. MacNamee
o
Have the selfdetermination NOT to rely on your executive
function skills forever.
 What if Your Child...
o Knew their greatest talents
o Understood their strengths and weaknesses
o Knew how and where to get help when needed
The #1 Skill Your Child Needs for Success=SELF ADVOCACY!
 Your child Is Able to...
o
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Describe and explain his/her impairment and understand his/her needs?
Describe and explain his/her testing and the results?
5. It’s a process and takes time to develop, so how does one begin as a parent?
How do I begin?
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o
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Ease Off the “Controls”
If your child is capable of doing a chore and/or skill....why are YOU doing it?
What is your child’s readiness temperature?
Collect Data:
What skills does your teen do only on his/her own
What skills YOU do for them without their request?
Directions or solutions?
Inconsistent or specific in behavior you want?
1 Behavior At a Time
o
o
o
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Choose a Neutral Time
Make sure you have their eyes and attention
Ask your child OPEN questions; not yes/no more details/repeating...the better!
It’s a “collaboration” to solve problems
6. Those OTHER Scary Behaviors!
o Driving
o Substance Abuse
o Suicide Risk
o The Law
o Things are better
You are not alone! Accept Support, Pause...and be proud!
All rights and copyright permission held by ADHD CoachConnect LLC 2015
www.adhdcoachconnect