SQUADS #2
CPW20
“9th Grade English”
Learning Intentions - Today, I am going to address these College
Readiness Standards in English:
1. Topic Development in Terms of Purpose and Focus 16-19
2. Conventions of Usage 13-15
3. Word Choice in Terms of Style, Tone, Clarity, and Economy 1315
4. Word Choice in Terms of Style, Tone, Clarity, and Economy 1619
5. Word Choice in Terms of Style, Tone, Clarity, and Economy 2023
6. Sentence Structure and Formation 13-15
7. Conventions of Punctuation 16-19
Success Criteria – I will know I am successful if I can identify the best use
of punctuation, usage, sentence structure, topic purpose, and word
choice.
Topic Development in Terms of Purpose and Focus 16-19
1. She trained for several years to prepare her body for temperatures that
would kill a normal person within eight minutes. In 2002, she swam over a
mile along the coast of Antarctica, wearing only a swimsuit.
The author is considering deleting the underlined words. If so, the sentence
would primarily lose:
A. unnecessary detail
B. helpful biographical background
C. vague specifics
D. helpful details that bolster the facts within the sentence
Answer: D
Rationale: When determining whether or not a part of a sentence should be
deleted, identify the purpose. In this case, we know we can eliminate letter B
and C as the answer because the underlined portion of the sentence is not
biographical and “eight minutes” is not considered “vague specifics.” The
shocking number makes what is being said even more significant because the
swimmer is doing something extreme so it is not unnecessary detail. If the
author deleted “within eight minutes”, the sentence would primarily lose
helpful details that strengthen or reinforce the facts within the sentence.
Conventions of Usage 13-15
2. She has swam the Gulf of Aqaba, the Nile, and the Cook Strait.
A. NO CHANGE
B. swim
C. swum
D. swimming
Answer: C
Rationale: Conjugating the verb “swim” is more difficult than other verbs
because it is considered irregular. We normally just add “ed” to create past
tense and past participle, such as, “She walked” and “She has walked.” Since
“swim” is an irregular verb, it doesn’t follow that same pattern. Instead,
conjugating the verb “swim” is like conjugating the following words: [begin,
began, has begun], [ring, rang, has rung], and [shrink, shrank, has shrunk].
The correct response is the irregular “has swum.”
Word Choice in Terms of Style, Tone, Clarity, and Economy 13-15
3. He eventually opened his own studio in Milan, where he continued
painting portraits. He later was hired to be a theater designer, an architect,
and worked as a sculptor.
A. NO CHANGE.
B. did some sculpting.
C. sculpted occasionally.
D. a sculptor.
Answer: D.
Rationale: To maintain consistent word choice in terms of the style and
economy, the author does not need to add extra “filler” words such as “did
some” or qualify how often the work was done. The author needs to revise
the sentence to stay consistent with “hired to be a theater designer, an
architect, and a sculptor.” The extra words make the sentence awkward.
Word Choice in Terms of Style, Tone, Clarity, and Economy 16-19
4. When Mt. St. Helens erupted, my training as a private pilot paid off.
My editor asked me to write a feature story on the volcano. Only
scientists and reporters were allowed within a ten-mile radius of the
mountain.
A. NO CHANGE
B. radius, consisting of ten miles,
C. measurement of a ten mile radius
D. radius, measuring ten miles
Answer: A.
Rationale: Given the choices, there should be no change made to the
sentence. “Ten-mile” radius is a succinct and clear word choice, whereas
other word choices such as “radius, consisting of ten miles,” are wordy.
Word Choice in Terms of Style, Tone, Clarity, and Economy 20-23
5. Eager to see Mt. St. Helens for himself, my brother Jeff volunteered to
accompany me as an assistant on the flight. He had never flown with
me before, and I look forward at the opportunity to show off my skills.
A. NO CHANGE
B. but I looked forward to the opportunity of showing off my skills.
C. and I looked forward to the opportunity of showing off my skills.
D. nevertheless I anticipated being able to show off my skills.
Answer: C.
Rationale: We can eliminate answer B because the conjunction “but” is not
logical. The word “nevertheless” would imply that the author is saying
something in spite of the fact that his brother had never flown with him
before. We can determine the clearest and most logical conjunction to link
the clauses is “and.” The change that needs to be made is revising the word
choice from “look forward at” to “look forward to.”
Sentence Structure and Formation 13-15
6. Only small electrical or clean hydrogen-powered vehicles will be
permitted in cities, and the energy to run them will come from solar
power plants.
A. NO CHANGE
B. which the energy
C. that the energy
D. the energy
Answer: A.
Rationale: The sentence is correct because it uses the appropriate sentence
structure and formation. The two clauses are connected by the conjunction
“and” which makes sense.
Conventions of Punctuation 16-19
7. We gasped as the hero, confronted ogres.
A. NO CHANGE
B. hero confronted
C. hero confronted,
D. hero – confronted
Answer: B.
Rationale: This sentence needs to be revised so that the comma does not
disturb sentence flow. Options C and D also use incorrect punctuation that
disturbs the sentence flow. The correct answer is B because it deletes the
comma and reads more clearly and logically.