Copyright © Arts for Youth 2014
Bridgewater, Wednesday, July 23, 2014
Guess the teacher:
Horoscopes with Mr. E
1. The teacher is a boy.
2. He has the same first name as
another teacher.
3. His last name starts with a B.
4. He teaches music workshops.
5. He has brown hair
6. He plays the drums
7. He is 26
Can you guess who this is?
Aries (March 21-April 20):
Unfortunately, everyone will forget
about your birthday. They all have
it in their heads that it is next
month. Fortunately, they will all
give you $100 each!
Taurus (April 21-May 21):
Cheesecake. Just…cheesecake.
Gemini (May 22-June 21):
Whatever you are drinking at 5:46
P.M. is actually grape juice.
Cancer (June 22-July 22): You will
receive a package in the mail from
your great-great grandmother
dated April 19th, 1903.
Leo (July 23-August 22): You will
have a birthday in either July or
August! Whoa, I just read your
mind!
Virgo (August 23-September 23):
If you end up eating lunch today, a
monkey on a starship will appear
in your dreams. You will always
forget about this weird dream,
though.
Libra (September 24-October 23):
You shall find yourself inside a
Ferrari with an elephant smell.
Scorpio: (October 24-November
22): Scorpions will invade your
water system, causing your dog to
eat cat food.
Sagittarius (November 23December 21): You will listen to
Queen because Queen is
awesome.
Capricorn (December 22-January
20): You will find the meaning of
life.
Aquarius (January 21- February
19): A magician will steal your
wallet and turn it into a pigeon.
Pisces (February 20- March 20):
The cats of the neighborhood will
accumulate and start following
you. You might become afraid of
this, but it is a natural occurrence.
By-Blueivy
Breaking News!!!!!
By: Broncosfan101
Today’s breaking news covers all
the lastest news in all sports
entertainment. First, NFL Denver
Broncos sign cornerback Aqib
Talib for a 6 year, 57 million dollar
contract. Next, at WWE
battleground superstar John Cena
defeats Randy Orton, Kane, and
Roman Reigns to retain the WWE
World Heavyweight
Championship. NHL Colorado
Avalanche sign Right Wing
Jarome Iginla to a 3 year, 16
million dollar contract as a free
agent from the Boston Bruins.
Jerome signed with the Avalanche
on his 37th Birthday. NBA
superstar LeBron James leaves
the Miami Heat to go back to his
home town of Cleveland to play for
the Cavaliers. LeBron signed a 2
year, 44 million dollar contract with
the Cavaliers. Finally, NFL
Pittsburgh Steelers sign Running
Back LeGarrette Blount to a 2
year, 3.85 million dollar contract
from free agency. That’s all for
today’s breaking news; tune in
next time for more interesting facts
and news in today’s sports
entertainment.
Newstand: 0¢
Another how to!
How to make. . . .
Your Furby EVIL!
_______________________
You’ll need:
1.) A Furby.
2.) A finger.
_____________________
Take your Furby and put your
finger in its mouth. This will
feed your Furby. Keep feeding
it for ages nonstop. Over
feeding it will cause it to go
absolutely crazy for a few
seconds with its eyes flashing.
Then it will burp, fart, growl, and
get a really deep voice.
_____________________
THIS METHOD REALLY
WORKS!!!!
*WARNING*
Once turned evil your Furby will
NOT turn nice again…..
- Mc Waffles
Mansion for Sale!!!
By:The Great Gatsby
This 199,999-room mansion with a
999 carat gold TV equipped with
200 servants and the best chefs to
cook for you. This product is also
on sale for 10% off and it is
$99,999,999,999,999,999,999!
The best part is it also comes with
a free Lamborghini With a driver
or you can choose a 555 carat
gold limo for free with the
purchase of the mansion.
Someone named Tyrone yellowcat just bought this and he loved it!
So buy this for a one day sale or
lose the chance.
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Top Ten Gatorade Flavors
By: Its Totally Not Ryan
10.Orange
Couldn’t Think Of
Another Flavor =(
9.Green
Apple
Peolple Need To
Taste This
8. Fruit
Punch
Berry.
New Flavor Good
New Taste
7. Rain
Berry.
A Little More Kick To
It
6. Blue
Cherry.
Perfect Flavor For
People That Like
Cherry and Cool
Blue
5. Fruit
Punch.
What Real Fruit
Punch Should Taste
Like
4. Cool
Blue.
Good Regular Taste
What Flavor
Represents
Gatorade
3. Lemon
Lime.
Classic really Thirst
Quenching.
2. Ice
Punch.
Different taste still
good
1. Glacier
Freeze.
Refreshing
Famous Birthdays on July 23
-Benjamin Flores Jr., 11 (actor)
-Philip Seymour Hoffman,
47(actor)
-Daniel Radcliffe, 24(actor)
-Gerald Wallace, 31 (NBA player)
-Harold Pee Wee Reese,
94(former MLB player)
-Gary Payton, 45(former
basketball player
-Shawn Thornton, 36 (hockey
player)
-Nomar Garciaparra, 40(former
MLB player)
-Brandon Roy, 29(basketball
player)
BY MR.PATRIOT
15 Food Facts That You Didn't
know by: FuzzyPolkaDot
In
Out
rams
patriots
1. When places like Dunkin
Donuts make donuts, they use the
center of the ring as the
munchkins.
2. Ripe cranberries will bounce like
balls.
3. Consuming a lot dairy might
cause acne.
4. Tea bags were created by
accident, as tea bags were sent
around as samples.
5. A Cinnabon Classic has less
sugar than a 20 oz. bottle of Pepsi.
6. Ranch dressing contains
titanium dioxide, which is used just
to make the dressing appear
whiter.
7. Just one fast food hamburger
alone can contain as many as
1000 different cows.
8. Fruit flavored snack have the
same wax contents used on cars.
9. Bananas, if eaten, can help fight
depression.
10. “SPAM” is really spiced ham.
11. The most popular carrot used
to be purple.
12. Cucumber is one of the most
hydrating foods to eat because it is
96% water.
13. Yams and sweet potatoes are
not the same thing.
14. Peanuts are not nuts, they are
legumes which are edible seeds
that grow in pods like peas and
beans which are also part of this
group.
15. All fruit loop colors have the
same taste.
mtn dew
red bull
Guess the Intern
He is a boy
 He judged the swing
competition
 Last session he wore scary
glasses on Wacky
Wednesday
 It his 2nd year
- Blind Spot
gummy bear gangnam style
war
peace
blue
red
nba
nhl
horse
cow
dallas
texas
captain
sergeant
green
yellow
2001
2002
Jokes
1. What is the laziest part of
the car?
2. How does the ocean greet
the beach?
3. What do you call a fake
noodle?
4. What happens if you eat
yeast and shoe polish?
5. What’s the difference
between a guitar and a fish?
6. What do you call an alligator
in a vest?
7. What do postal workers do
when they’re mad?
8. What is at the end of
everything?
8.
Answers
The Tires
It Waves
Impasta
You will rise and shine
You can’t tuna fish
An Investigator
They stamp their feet
The letter G
9.
- Fluffy Unicorn
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
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Hello, let’s talk about sports.
Hello everybody it’s
BeastModeBruin here with some of
the most breaking news in sports. In
basketball, Lebron James has left
the Miami Heat and gone to the
Cleveland Cavaliers. The Cavaliers
hopefully will have lots of wins from
now on. With Kyrie Irving, Lebron
James, and the developing Andrew
Wiggins they will most likely be a
fantastic team. But Andrew Wiggins
might not stay with Cleveland at all.
The Cavs might trade Andrew
Wiggins, Anthony Bennett, and their
1st round draft pick for Kevin Love.
If Love goes to the Cavs they could
possibly have a BIG 3. I think the
Cavs are doing a good job of
building a championship team.
And for sports at AFY there
was handball with Andrew and
Sarah. We played handball.
Handball is a game where there is a
ball that you try to throw into the
other team’s goal. You can only take
3 steps and then you can shoot or
pass the ball. The team with the
most points at the end of the game
wins. The team I was playing on put
up a fight and put up some points
but couldn’t capitalize with a win.
We lost 6-5. Hopefully we will play
again so my team will be able to get
revenge and end up with a win.
Anyway, that’s all I have for
today. Read my articles every day
for exciting and interesting stories.
Review
By: Tyrone Yellow-Cat
Hello there! I've recently bought my
very own Mansion. If you want to
purchase one of your own they go to
amazon.com and search “Mansion”
There will be a large selection to
choose from, the mansion I bought
includes 199999 rooms! It also
comes with 200 servants that are all
yours. This Mansion is only
$99999999999999999999. How
cheap is that?! In my opinion it’s a
really good deal. Did I mention it
comes with a free Lamborghini?
You are gonna love it. It’s gonna
make all your friends jealous. :D
GO TO
Come to unicorn land. At unicorn
land there are roller coasters and
unicorn rides. You can also go to
the unicorn petting zoo to pet and
feed them. When you feed them
cake they poop
out rainbows, if
you feed them
cotton candy their
poop is pink and
purple and it’s
sparkly! There
are all color unicorns purple, green,
orange, red, pink, blue, silver, gold,
and even rainbows. There are also
great food carts and restaurants
such as the unidog, and the yummy
unicorn. But do not worry; there are
bathrooms near all restaurants and
food trucks just in case. It is on a
cloud and there is only one plane in
the whole world to take you there,
so plane tickets are $782 per
person. The hotels are expensive
except the Aloha unicorn. At Aloha
unicorn you pay $20 a night but
there is no pool and it is in the
middle of nowhere. Other hotels are
$40,000-$700,000 a night. You can
also rent houses which are even
more expensive. Every activity you
do is money so we have a bank to
store your money. If you run out of
money you will be thrown off the
cloud. So come to unicorn land to
have a fun and relaxing vacation,
but be sure to bring money or down
the cloud you go!
-Uma Numa
Advice with Blueivy:
Dear Blueivy,
I want to change my name, what
should it be?
-Nameless
Dear Nameless,
You should change your name to
Chicken McFly, It is very classy and
hard to forget.
Dear Blueivy,
Where should I live?
-idontknow
Dear idontknow,
You should live on the Moon. I hear
it is lovely this time of year.
Fun Facts with Me!










A hummingbird weighs less than
a penny
The average American drinks
about 600 sodas a year
A jellyfish is 95% water
You are 1% shorter in the
evening then the morning
It would take 1,000 years to
watch every video on YouTube
A man named Charles
Osborne had the hiccups for
69 years
The tongue is the strongest
muscle in the body
Men are 6 times more likely to
be struck by lightning than
women
Donald Duck comics were
banned from Finland because
he doesn’t wear pants
You are more likely to die
from a falling coconut than a
shark attack
Well, that’s it! So, Goodbye!
-GummyBear847
Banana Crazy
Hey there, I am new to this camp so
I want to see what you think. All day
long I was stuck with a girl that was
addicted to bananas. She is just,
bananas!!! After day 5 I was done. I
told her to stop making a mess of a
bunch of bananas!!! But I found out
that she had all of the bananas for a
reason. She had them because she
has a pet monkey that loves
bananas, but I still didn’t
understand. She then explained that
she gave her monkey a bad banana
so he super-glued them to her and
they have been stuck on for 6
months! I told her to just smoosh the
bananas and they would not be
there anymore. She did that and it
worked!!! She gave me a present
and drove away as fast as she
could. At first I didn't understand but
then I opened the box and there
was an angry monkey with superglue in his hands and a lot of
bananas.
THE END
-NoodleEater
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Advice with Dan AquaPanther:
Kids and Dogs!
Help Wanted
I have heard all about your advice
section so I thought; why not get
some advice from the “pro.” So, I
am having a problem with my dog.
He is never listening to me no
matter how much I bribe him. I
give him everything he wants, all
the new games and such. I take
him out to dinner and get him
whatever he wants all the time. I
keep telling him to sit down, listen,
and for once, stop barking. I have
another dog and it does everything
it is supposed to. It doesn’t even
need a bribe at all. Basically, if you
could give me some advice on my
dog problem please tell me what I
should do with him.
Hey Reader! My pet unicorn
told me I’m not taking care of
her properly. Twinkle HappyFeet would greatly appreciate
your assistance because I
work a busy schedule! You will
get paid $25 per day and owe
me $52 after every two days!
Low, right? I know! You are in
charge of buying Twinkle
Happy-Feet ALL new supplies
and the money will not be
included in your paycheck!
This job is for 8 weeks. I am
going to Hawaii and may never
be back but this WILL affect
your paycheck so don’t worry!
Thanks,
Needy Father
-SenioritaMoustachio
Dear Dan Aqua-Panther,
Dear Needy Father,
I am happy to help you with your
dog problem. First off, by the
description you have been giving
me, your “dog” sounds like a 7
year old kid. So you might want to
check on that. Also, with a kid, you
have to have patience and if
he/she doesn’t listen, you need to
wait a minute and if he/she still
doesn’t listen that is when you
threaten to punish him. So all I can
really tell you is be a lot more
forceful and don’t give your kid
everything he desires. Also stuff
like going out to dinner and buying
new games for him should be
more of a reward. And most of all,
you should probably see a doctor
because you shouldn’t be
confusing a dog with a kid, so go
straight to a doctor.
Thanks for writing,
Dan Aqua-Panther
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