The Monk’s Heavy Load
I’ll read one last Buddhist story today to bring August and our month of
stories in the Buddhist tradition to a close. July we focused on stories Jesus
told. Next month we’ll begin with a special look at the stories we tell ourselves
and interfaith minister Reverend David Iobst will join me to share how the
stories he tells himself have changed over the years. The rest of September I
have selected a Lakota tale, a Muslim story and a story from a book of
Kabbalah, the mystic tradition of Judaism. Stories provide us such a rich
resource for understanding more about ourselves and our relationship with
Spirit.
Today’s story is fairly common and I just read it the other night in a totally
unrelated book, “Flying Without Wings” by Arnold Bessier. I highly
recommend the insights of that book on disability. But back to The Monk’s
Heavy Load.
One fine, warm, spring day, two monks—one young and one old—were
traveling to a village far from their monastery to do some trading. In the high
mountains where they lived, there were only small trails between villages, no
roads and few bridges. This spring had been especially warm. Winter’s dense
snow was melting quickly and many streams had become too swollen and
dangerous to cross.
After walking a distance on a rugged, steep trail, the two monks came upon a
fast moving stream where a small, young woman stood timidly on the bank,
afraid to cross. The young monk reminded himself that as part of his religious
training, he had vowed never to touch anyone of the opposite sex. He nodded
to the young woman as he passed her by, lifted his monk’s robe up slightly
and carefully began to negotiate the stream. But to the young monk’s
amazement, the elder monk sped right past him while carrying the young
woman in his arms! When the old monk put her down on the far shore, she
bowed respectfully to him in thanks. Not saying a word in reply, the monk
gave her a bright, broad smile and went on his way with a quick step.
The young monk saw that the elder had continued on without him. With
some effort he finally managed to catch up. But as they walked on, he
considered and considered and reconsidered the old monk’s action back at the
1
stream. With each passing mile his thoughts grew angrier and angrier until,
hours later, he stopped in his tracks, flush with rage.
He shouted and sputtered at the old monk, “You broke your sacred vows! You
were never to touch a woman! How can you forgive yourself? You should not
be allowed back to our monastery!”
Surprised at this outburst, the old monk turned to face him. “I put that
woman down hours ago,” he said. “Have you been carrying her all this time?”
Ah, so which monk had the heavy load?
The affirmations that go with this story are: Delight in mindfulness; notice
your thoughts.
Let me begin with the most obvious metaphor related to the different ages of
the monks. While youth can represent innocence, it often represents
immaturity. Age, on the other hand, represents maturity. Socially we make
assumptions that spiritual maturity arises from an accumulation of
experiences. In many traditions elders are held in high esteem and honored
for the years they have spent on the path of spirituality. In real life we may
find spiritually mature young people who have benefited from an upbringing
that allowed them to be in touch with their higher self. We may find older
people who have lived foolishly as slaves to the material world and remain
totally out of touch with their spirituality. But in this story I believe we find
the simple metaphor that the young monk is immature and the elder monk is
spiritually mature. So, of course, the elder monk represents our Buddha
nature or our Christ nature; the higher self that is our true nature. The
young monk is our ego or outer focused self.
Can you feel the tension rising in the young monk as the story unfolds? Can
you just sense the cogs of judgment turning in his mind as he plays and
replays the elder monk’s contact with the young woman? The fury builds in
the young monk while the elder monk is free to move forward with ease. This
reminds me of two very different situations I encounter in my life.
The first is experiences I have had living with people who forgive themselves
easily. A little too easily, if you ask me! And they NEVER ask me!
2
What happens is someone close to me does something I find very hurtful.
Either I say something about it or they come to the realization what they have
done was hurtful. And they say, “I’m sorry.” And then they walk away and
are totally done with it. They don’t want to talk about it anymore. They don’t
feel they need to do anything more. They don’t appear to want to know how I
feel about it. And I would REALLY like to tell them how I feel about it! I am
not happy! Sorry don’t fix it! What is broken is still broken. Whatcha gonna
do about that?!! Stop. Breathe. . . well what can they really do about that?
What is broken is still going to be broken.
These are the situations in which we judge the other person’s actions, whether
it directly impacts us or not, and we believe we should be in charge of the
extent of the punishment. The young monk says the elder should not be
allowed back into the monastery. It basically comes down to the measure of
suffering we believe is sufficient to balance the pain or harm of the action, in
our opinion. The young monk says, “How can you forgive yourself?” Well,
that is none of my business. No more than it is my business when I wonder,
“How can they live with themselves?” Not my business. I simply have the
choice to hold onto my feelings of anger and pain or not. That is my
business. Not only do we see this playing out in our personal lives, we bring
this judgment to our view of national and world events. What thoughts do we
hold about punishing Jerry Sandusky, the Boston bomber, the wiki leaks
fugitive in Russia now or the leaders in Syria? Do we trust the balance the
Universe provides or do we feel we should be in charge of what happens to
others? Obviously, if we serve on a legal jury, we have responsibilities. If our
role in life is to serve as a judge, we have professional guidelines. Yet often,
we put ourselves in the role of judge and jury and hold on to the judgment we
render in frustration because the punishment is not carried out. Who is
harmed as we hold the rage in us? Who is carrying the heavier burden? And
for that matter, what do we know of the burden the other person carries.
Now this takes us to an interesting place. Did the elder monk do anything to
the younger monk? The first experience I contemplated was really about
situations in which I felt I had personally been harmed. Is the young monk
harmed or simply outraged at what the elder monk had done? This calls up
for me the many demonstrations of healing and compassion that Jesus
performed that broke one of the many “laws” of Jewish tradition. It also calls
3
up Jesus’ contempt for the Pharisees. As Unity co-founder Charles Fillmore
says, Pharisees are those “who observe the letter of the religious law but not
its spirit; lacking in understanding of the Truth”. Jesus was bewildered that
the Pharisees could challenge him for healing, calling it work on the Sabbath.
As if he could withhold compassion and not do what he could do to help
another because of the day of the week it was. He touched the unclean with a
healing touch without remorse that he violated laws of purity that cast out
certain people from the comfort of touch and interaction. The elder monk
could forgive himself because he saw nothing to forgive. He had the
opportunity to be of service and, with a clean heart and a clean mind, he
violated a vow without violating the intention of the vow.
The author Walter Mosley is an African-American writer who sets up
interesting moral situations in contexts that cause the reader to question our
quick judgment of what is right and wrong. Many of us have recently seen the
movie, “The Butler.” We see the justifications the white majority used to make
peace with clearly violent and oppressive actions but in the beginning of the
movie we also see Cecil, who becomes the Butler, break a window and steal
food because he is so hungry. The hotel servant who responds sees the
disparity between those, like the owner, who have so much and give so little
and this hungry young man, willing to work if given a chance. And so the
servant chooses to not see a violation of the law and, although not shown
directly, he lies to the owner. A Pharisee or a young monk, our judging self,
sees only the stealing and lying; is outraged and seeks punishment. An elder
monk, our Buddha nature or Christ nature sees only the desperation of
another human and an opportunity to help. Who is at peace with themselves
and their fellow humans, the young monk or the elder monk?
This story and its affirmation invite us to examine our thoughts on a daily,
hourly or moment to moment basis. Who are we judging? Is judgment a
beneficial use of our thoughts? Discerning or weighing the best action for me
is different than judging if I did right or wrong or if someone else did right or
wrong. If my judgment is a discerning process for my own actions, it is
beneficial. If my judgment is to condemn the actions of myself or others with
an outcome to punish, it is not beneficial. Have I become so focused on the
“letter of the law” that I have abandoned understanding my spiritual nature as
love and compassion in expression?
4
One of my favorite reflective questions is, “Who have I put outside my heart?”
I can maintain appropriate boundaries and still view someone with
compassion. Allowing my heart to remain open to someone is not the same as
allowing them to hurt me. However putting others outside my heart is an
action that affects me more than it affects them.
Think of challenging moments today or last week. What were your thoughts?
Do you still carry those thoughts in this moment? Why? How are they
serving you? Allow yourself to release the need to judge and trust the
balancing energy of the Universe. The Universe is a great teacher. We will
learn what is needed whether we condemn others and ourselves or not. Are
you ready to trust the Universe and let go of judgment? Are you ready to
accept your learning without pain and suffering? Are you ready to be the
expression of Spirit you were created to be? Notice your thoughts.
Namaste.
5