ACT II
Scene 19
(On main stage, BECKA SU backs out of hotel followed by JUDGE and MRS. PARKINS—who both carry
a suitcase.)
BECKA (angrily): What do you mean, you’re not stayin’? You’re the only hangin’ judge in
these-here parts; you got a duty to perform!
JUDGE: I’m sorry, my dear, but a family emergency necessitates my immediate departure.
BECKA: Well, what about my “family emergency”? What are you gonna do about that
“Slick” fella and what he done to my cousin?
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JUDGE (severely): Young lady, your case has been dismissed! Now stand back!
BECKA: No; I will not stand back!
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SHERIFF (stepping toward BECKA SU): Better do as he says, ma’am.
BECKA: I will not!
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(SHERIFF shrugs and turns away. BECKA SU grabs gun from SHERIFF’s holster and shoots it in the air.)
[SFX: Bang!]
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(JUDGE and MRS. PARKINS drop suitcases. Mass confusion as all yell or scream and put hands in air.
JED scrambles behind JACK, cowering. JUDGE and MRS. PARKINS stand to the right of BECKA SU.
SHERIFF, JED, and JACK stand to her left. MR. CHANG is inside of mercantile looking through window
with hands up. BECKA SU points gun at JUDGE.)
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JUDGE (quavering): I must remind you, young lady, that . . . shootin’ a judge is a . . . (swallows painfully) . . . hangin’ offense!
(Stage left cast lower hands as BECKA SU talks to JUDGE.)
BECKA (holds gun on JUDGE): I don’t care. If I gotta shoot ya to make you listen, then that’s
what I’m gonna do!
(BECKA whirls gun to her left. Stage left cast jerk hands higher into air, fearfully. JUDGE and MRS.
PARKINS lower hands in relief.)
BECKA: Now y’all gonna listen to me ’cause I’m a witness to a crime! (BECKA turns gun back
to SR. JUDGE and MRS. PARKINS put hands up; others put them down.) There’s a wrong been
done, and I got the right to tell it in a court of law.
SHERIFF (calmly approaches BECKA): Becka Su, give me the gun.
(BECKA whirls gun on SHERIFF. SHERIFF and SL cast jerk hands up; JUDGE and MRS. PARKINS put
hands down.)
Copyright © 1996 by Bette Dale Moore. All print rights administered by Lillenas Publishing Co. All rights reserved. www.lillenasdrama.com.
37
BECKA (waves gun): Not unless you promise that justice will be done.
SHERIFF: That’s what I’m here for. Give me the gun and let the law handle your grievance.
(BECKA turns gun on JUDGE; SR cast hands up, SL hands down.)
BECKA: If I give it back, do I get to testify?
(Gun on SHERIFF; SL cast hands up, SR cast hands down)
SHERIFF: You do.
(Gun on JUDGE; SR hands up, SL hands down)
BECKA: You promise?
(Gun on SHERIFF; SL hands up, SR hands down)
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SHERIFF: I promise. Now give me the gun. (Holds hand out)
(BECKA pauses slightly. Hands move up and down as BECKA SU with gun whirls quickly from side to
side)
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BECKA: Oh . . . (whirls right) oh . . . (whirls left) oh . . . (whirls right) . . . all right. (Reluctantly
hands SHERIFF the gun) But remember, you promised!
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(SHERIFF takes gun; all hands down in relief.)
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JUDGE (beat): Well done, Sheriff! Now if you will kindly lock this woman up with the other
criminals, Mrs. Parkins and I will be on our way.
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BECKA (bristles): Lock me up?! I ain’t no criminal; I’m a witness!
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SHERIFF (soothing): That’s right, you are. O
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(BECKA SU glowers and moves to JUDGE’s table. She sits and props feet up on table. JACK smoothly
steps forward and picks up suitcases.)
JACK: Here, Judge; allow me to take these for you.
JUDGE (pleased): Oh, why, that’s right nice of you, Mr. Bliss. (Offers arm to MRS. PARKINS)
Come, Mrs. Parker, we got us a stage to catch.
(MRS. PARKINS takes JUDGE’s arm, they start to exit SL.)
SHERIFF (aside to JED): Did he say Park-er?
JED (confused): I don’t know.
JACK: Deputy, would you be so kind as to put these suitcases in the jail for me? (Gives suitcases to JED)
JED: Yes, sir. (Puts suitcases in the jail)
MRS. PARKINS (turning, indignant): In the jail? What do you think you’re doin’?
Copyright © 1996 by Bette Dale Moore. All print rights administered by Lillenas Publishing Co. All rights reserved. www.lillenasdrama.com.
38
JACK: Just my job . . . making sure that all the witnesses stay in town until the trial’s over.
JUDGE: Now see here, Mr. Bliss! I’m not a witness; I’m the Judge!
JACK: So you say. But you know, Judge, I’ve been doin’ a little research, over the years, and
as far as I can tell, the United States Judicial courts show no record of a Judge Parkins
ever being appointed to serve in Dust Valley.
JUDGE (blusters): Well, you see, it’s very simple . . . I . . .
MRS. PARKINS (interrupts viciously): You have no right to detain us!
JACK (laughs): Oh . . . but you are sadly mistaken. As an official representative of the United States government (all gasp in surprise as JACK whips open lapel of coat to show his
badge) I have every right to detain the both of you.
(SLICK bursts through mercantile door and exclaims with others)
ALL (exclaiming together): He’s a U.S. marshal!
(SLICK returns to mercantile, slams door.)
JED: Gol-ly!
P
(JUDGE and MRS. PARKINS turn to each other in dismay.)
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JACK (turns abruptly): If there are no objections, the defense asks Miss Penelope Perry to return to the stand.
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JED (helpfully): You want I should go fetch her from the mercantile?
JACK: If you would be so kind.
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(JED crosses SL and enters mercantile. JUDGE and MRS. PARKINS nervously exchange looks.)
JACK: Now, Judge, while we’re waiting for Miss Perry, would you mind showing the court
what kind of identification papers you’re carrying? Just take everything out of your
pockets and lay them here on the table.
JUDGE (grumpily): This is highly irregular. But, um, well . . . I have nothing to hide. (Searches
pockets. Takes papers out of inside pocket, lays them on table.) Here are my papers. (Finds
JACK’s card, slaps it on table on word “sir”) Your . . . (glares at JACK, stresses word disdainfully)
card, sir. (Pulls small change out of pants pocket, puts it on table) That there’s mine, remember. I’ll be wantin’ it back. (Fishes car keys out of pocket and dangles them toward audience)
Keys to the . . . (grins at audience) . . . mustang.4 (Tosses keys to JACK. Takes out wallet.) And
my wallet. (Lays it on table) There, that’s all there is.
JACK (picks up JUDGE’s wallet): I assume this is your wallet?
JUDGE: Yes.
4. Contributed by Allen B. Ellis, the original Judge.
Copyright © 1996 by Bette Dale Moore. All print rights administered by Lillenas Publishing Co. All rights reserved. www.lillenasdrama.com.
39
JACK: Now, isn’t this interesting. (Opens wallet and reads deliberately) It says, Judge Parker.
(Lowers wallet and looks at JUDGE) I thought you said your name was Parkins.
BECKA (stands, suspicious): Parker? Why, that’s the same name that Slick fella had. (Demands of JUDGE) Is he kin to you?
MRS. PARKINS (nervously cuts in, facing BECKA SU): Leave him alone; he don’t know nothin’!
(MRS. PARKINS and BECKA SU glare at each other face-to-face. BECKA breaks away and stomps off
SL. JUDGE nervously sits at table while MRS. PARKINS moves upstage and rapidly fans herself. PENELOPE enters from mercantile. JED returns to stand by SHERIFF.)
PENELOPE (imperiously): You called for me, Mr. Bliss?
JACK (turning): Yes, Miss Penelope, I did. Earlier, you testified that your pocketbook had
been stolen. Is that correct?
PENELOPE (primly): Yes, it is.
JACK: Could you please describe that pocketbook for us?
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(JACK leans forward, hands on table. Unseen by others, he slips PENELOPE’s pocketbook onto table
with other items. Hides it under the JUDGE’s papers.)
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PENELOPE: Certainly. It was dark blue with a dainty red stripe on the side.
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JACK (picking up pocketbook from table): Could this item—taken from the pocket of our esteemed “Judge”—be the missing pocketbook?
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(JUDGE looks at pocketbook, horrified. Opens coat and looks inside, totally bewildered.)
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PENELOPE (gasps): It most assuredly is! (Grabs pocketbook and clutches it to herself. Glares at
JUDGE and moves upstage.)
D
SHERIFF: Well, I’ll be; the Judge is a thief!
JUDGE: No, no; you got it all wrong! I didn’t steal that pocketbook; I’ve been framed! (Points
gavel at JACK) You’re makin’ a big mistake!
JACK: On the contrary, Judge. I am making a . . . calculated error.
JUDGE (totally confused): A what?
(MRS. PARKINS starts stealthily backing away SL. BECKA SU blocks her exit, pushing her back, crossing SR.)
BECKA: You ain’t goin’ nowhere, Mrs. Parkins-Parker-whoever-you-are! Not ’til I get me
some answers.
MRS. PARKINS (shrieks): Clarence! Clarence!
(JUDGE thinks MRS. PARKINS is calling him. Turns to answer as SLICK enters from mercantile with
SARYBETH clinging to his arm. MR. CHANG follows and stands in doorway.)
Copyright © 1996 by Bette Dale Moore. All print rights administered by Lillenas Publishing Co. All rights reserved. www.lillenasdrama.com.
40
JUDGE: Yes, dear?
SLICK: Somebody needin’ some help out here?
JUDGE (whirls at the sound of SLICK’s voice, dismayed): Clarence?
SHERIFF (puzzled—looks from SLICK to MRS. PARKINS): Clarence?
JED (to SHERIFF): Who?
BECKA (pointing at SLICK): You! (Turns to SHERIFF) Sheriff, that’s the man! He’s the scoundrel
that done my cousin wrong! (Rolling up her sleeve) Stand back, Sarybeth; I’m gonna kill
him.
SARYBETH (moves protectively in front of SLICK): No! You can’t kill him, Becka Su! We’re gettin’
married!
BECKA/JUDGE/MRS. PARKINS (together): Married?
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SLICK (grins happily): That’s right . . . married! Me and Sarybeth done bought us some property from Mr. Chang with our little nest egg. We’ve decided to settle down right here in
Dust Valley.
SARYBETH: We sho’ ’nuf have!
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(SLICK and SARYBETH gaze lovingly into each other’s eyes.)
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MR. CHANG: Ah so-desca. Gude ploppety; (holds money up and rubs it between fingers) gude
plice too! Ev’lee-body hoppy!
S
BECKA/JUDGE/MRS. PARKINS (together): Married?
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(All three slump in shock, moaning loudly. MR. CHANG bows and exits into mercantile.)
(JED stands SR to the left of SHERIFF.)
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JED: Sheriff, if the Judge stole Penelope’s pocketbook, does that mean Running Bear didn’t
do it?
SHERIFF: That’s right; he’s innocent, so you’re a free man.
JED: Gol-ly! Does that mean I can leave?
SHERIFF: Yup.
JED: Then I best be helpin’ Running Bear get his trunk back to town. (Starts to exit through
audience) I reckon he’s through loadin’ it up by now.
PENELOPE (overhears): What do you mean by “his trunk”? And what’s he loadin’ it up with?
(JED continues his exit.)
PENELOPE (shrills): Deputy! You come back here and tell me what you’re talkin’ about,
young man!
Copyright © 1996 by Bette Dale Moore. All print rights administered by Lillenas Publishing Co. All rights reserved. www.lillenasdrama.com.
41
JED (calls back while exiting through audience): Sorry, ma’am; can’t do that. I been . . . (jumps up
onto rear stage, hat over heart) . . . sworn to secrecy! (JED exits.)
PENELOPE: Ahhhh! (Crossing SR to SHERIFF) Sheriff, I demand to know what’s goin’ on!
SHERIFF: ’Fraid I can’t tell ya, ma’am; ’cause I don’t rightly know.
JACK: I’ll take it from here, Sheriff. This trial isn’t over yet, and I believe there are some witnesses in the audience that still need to testify. (Peering into audience, points) You over
there by Crazy Horse Canyon. Yes, you. Stand up a minute. Thank you. What’s your
name?
WITNESS 1 (AUDIENCE PARTICIPANT 4 stands and gives name.)
JACK: Well, Mister/Miss, isn’t it true that you saw Jed and Running Bear carry that trunk
over to the Blake homestead?
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WITNESS 1 (May ramble along evasively, checking with others at table. Eventually answers positively: “Yes, I did.”)
JACK: I thought so. Did you notice anything unusual about the trunk? Any special kind of
engraving or initials or something.
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JACK: And did you happen to see what those initials were? I
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WITNESS 1 (Confers with those around him; they give several different ideas on what the initials
T
were. Final answer to be: “I believe they were ‘R. B.’”)
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JACK: Thank you kindly. You may sit down. (JN
ACK consults notes.)
O
(WITNESS 1 sits.)
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WITNESS 1 (Final answer to include: “It had some fancy-looking initials engraved on the lid.”)
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PENELOPE (eyes big): R. B.? (Slowly) Was that my Reuben Blake’s trunk in the jail all those
years?
SHERIFF (matter-of-factly): Either that or Running Bear’s.
PENELOPE (indignant): Running Bear’s? Don’t be ridiculous.
JACK: I believe we have another witness over there by Fool’s Gold Gulch. (Points to WITNESS
2) You; yes, you. Stand up there. Don’t you have something to report?
WITNESS 2 (AUDIENCE PARTICIPANT 5 stands from Fool’s Gold Gulch. This witness may be played
straight, hysterically, melodramatically, or with a slight touch of insanity. Required information to include: “I think I saw a murder committed at the Perry place!”)
JUDGE (revives, delighted): A murder? Why, that’s a hangin’ offense for sure!
SHERIFF (to WITNESS 2): Who do ya reckon it was that got themselves killed?
WITNESS 2 (Required information: “I believe it was Miss Maybelle Perry.”)
Copyright © 1996 by Bette Dale Moore. All print rights administered by Lillenas Publishing Co. All rights reserved. www.lillenasdrama.com.
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(WITNESS 2 remains standing.)
PENELOPE: Somebody killed my sister . . . my Maybelle? (Screams and faints)
SARYBETH: Not again!
(General uproar and confusion. SARYBETH rushes to PENELOPE’s side, patting her face. MR. CHANG
brings pillow from mercantile. Starts to put it over PENELOPE’s face. SARYBETH scolds him and puts it
under PENELOPE’s head. MRS. PARKINS viciously gestures to SLICK for him to join her during confusion.)
SLICK (frowning): What?
MRS. PARKINS (hisses): Come here.
(SLICK reluctantly crosses stage right to join MRS. PARKINS. She ad-libs questioning/scolding upstage.)
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JUDGE (banging gavel): Order; order in the court! (Noise subsides)
BECKA (to SHERIFF): Sheriff, can he still be judge if’n he’s a thief?
SHERIFF: Sure. Happens all the time.
BECKA: Well, somehow that don’t seem right.
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SHERIFF: Sorry . . . that’s the way . . .
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(JUDGE interrupts, bellowing at SHERIFF and BECKA SU, pounding gavel.)
JUDGE: Order in the court!
JACK: Thank you, Judge.
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JUDGE: My pleasure. Proceed.
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JACK (to WITNESS 2): Sir/ma’am, what makes you think Miss Maybelle was murdered?
WITNESS 2 (Required information: “I heard her scream and then saw her abducted from her own
house!”)
(WITNESS 2 sits down. General noise and confusion. SARYBETH fans PENELOPE with her handkerchief.
MRS. PARKINS hauls SLICK to downstage right by his ear.)
MRS. PARKINS (accusing): Did you do it, Clarence?
SLICK (stage whisper): No, Ma; I ain’t no murderer.
MRS. PARKINS (threateningly): Clarence . . . if you’re lying to me again . . . so help me I’ll . . .
(She threatens him with folded fan. SLICK cringes away from impending blow.)
(LILLY enters hurriedly from back of audience.)
LILLY (interrupts, calling): Sheriff! Yoo-hoo, Sheriff! I need to talk to you. Sheriff? (SHERIFF steps
downstage to meet LILLY. LILLY arrives at main stage.) Somethin’ awful happened at the Perry
Copyright © 1996 by Bette Dale Moore. All print rights administered by Lillenas Publishing Co. All rights reserved. www.lillenasdrama.com.
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house. I went there to show Maybelle my new dress and bonnet and . . . (JACK steps forward,
standing to right of SHERIFF.) Oh my. Mr. Bliss! (Smiles) What are you doin’ here?
JACK: Just playing out my hand, Miss Lilly. Just playing out my hand.
LILLY (breathlessly): And what kind of hand have you been dealt today, Mr. Bliss?
JACK (taking LILLY’s hand): Now that you’re here, Miss Lilly; I most assuredly have a full
house.
LILLY: Oh my.
(JACK and LILLY gaze into each other’s eyes.)
SHERIFF (clears throat): ’Scuse me, Miss Lilly; but, uh, what was that you were sayin’ about
the Perry house?
LILLY (answers vaguely, still gazing at JACK): The what?
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SHERIFF (patiently): The . . . (snaps fingers between JACK and LILLY) . . . Perry house.
LILLY (starts): Oh. (Tearing her eyes away from JACK) That’s right, I almost forgot (smiles and
smoothes dress)—I’m a witness, aren’t I? (Importantly) The Perry house has been vandalized, and I found this piece of evidence! (Holds ring up for all to see. JUDGE starts guiltily.)
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JACK (taking ring from LILLY): A wedding ring, Miss Lilly?
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LILLY (smiling coyly): That’s what it be lookin’ like to me. (She bats eyes at JACK, then suddenly
remembers herself.) I found it in Maybelle and Penelope’s livin’ room. According to the
inscription on the inside, it belongs to a Clarence S. Parker.
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SLICK: I didn’t do nothin’! (Hisses) And don’t call me Clarence!
MRS. PARKINS (hauls SLICK downstage by ear): Clarence! You did!
MRS. PARKINS (shrills): I’ll call you by your Christian name any time I feel like it, Mr.
Clarence S. Parker!
(Silence as all eyes turn to MRS. PARKINS and SLICK)
JACK (crosses to SLICK): Well, Mr. Clarence—Slick is it?—Parker . . . according to this witness
(gestures to MRS. PARKINS), it would appear that the ring found at the scene of the crime
belongs to you.
(SARYBETH runs to SLICK and clings to his arm.)
SARYBETH: Slick, is what they’re sayin’ true: is your name really Clarence?
SLICK: Yes, Sarybeth; I was named after my pa.
MRS. PARKINS (warning): Clarence . . .
SLICK (flares): Well, I was, Ma. (MRS. PARKINS angrily moves CS to stand behind JUDGE.) I’m tired
of hidin’ ever’thing. If you and Pa can start over with a new life, so can I.
Copyright © 1996 by Bette Dale Moore. All print rights administered by Lillenas Publishing Co. All rights reserved. www.lillenasdrama.com.
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