Leading With Influence

Leading with Influence
• Influence: what you think you have until you try to use it
(Joan Welsh)
• You cannot antagonize and influence at the same time
(J S Knox)
• People exercise an unconscious selection in being influenced
(T. S. Eliot)
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Influence is...
About power
Political
• The art or science of influencing people
• Politics is who gets what, when and how
• How rival interests are played out
• What naturally happens whenever people
with different goals, interests and
personalities try to work together
About relationships
• Power in organisations is increasingly
‘referent’ – that is, from the followers
• Power that comes externally, from position
or policy, is alright for pushing people
• Power that comes internally, from behaviour
and commitment, is great for pulling people
• “Education is a human right with immense
power to transform” (Kofi Annan)
About behaviour
• It’s not what you know, it’s who you know
(and how you know them...)
• Relationship engages ‘discretionary energy’
• Great things are often done for people
more than reasons
• The time to build a relationship is not when
you need something
• Congruence – what I say and do match
• Modelling key behaviours
• Breaking cycles of unchallenged behaviour
• Courage and commitment are infectious
• Using emotional intelligence to guide
decisions and support for others
• This is the way we’ve agreed to do it and
this is the way I do it myself
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21st Century Leadership
What are the sources of power and authority available to
leaders today?
LEADER
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1
A sweet example
•
I’m your Father, and I am telling you to give your sister one of
your bonbons
•
Eating too many sweets is very bad for you. You’ll understand
why when you get to my age. Now, share some with your
sister
•
You’ll do it for me, won’t you? That’s a good lad. Go on, let
your sister have one. That’s my boy!
•
Sharing is what families do. If we keep things to ourselves,
then we all lose out in the end. Now let Lucy have one. It’s
the right thing to do
•
You can both have some of my sweets. In fact, you take them
and share them between yourselves
•
We’ve talked about this before, so I’ll let you decide. What do
you think you should do?
4
A sweet example
•
I’m your Father, and I am telling you to give your sister one of
your bonbons
•
Eating too many sweets is very bad for you. You’ll understand
why when you get to my age. Now, share some with your
sister
•
You’ll do it for me, won’t you? That’s a good lad. Go on, let
your sister have one. That’s my boy!
•
Sharing is what families do. If we keep things to ourselves,
then we all lose out in the end. Now let Lucy have one. It’s
the right thing to do
•
You can both have some of my sweets. In fact, you take them
and share them between yourselves
•
We’ve talked about this before, so I’ll let you decide. What do
you think you should do?
5
Sources of power and authority
•
•
•
•
•
•
Position / policy
Knowledge and experience
Personality
Moral authority
Behavioural
Relationship
Which do you use? When and why?
6
2
Directions of influence
Seniors (internal and external)
Peers immediate
Peers –
removed / remote
/ external
Reports (direct and ‘dotted’)
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Influence in action
Have
used?
8
A question of influence
Golden Rule:
Do unto others as you would have them do unto you
Platinum Rule:
Do unto others as they would like to be done unto
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3
Objectives for the session
• To consider the ‘four temperaments’ in a work context
• To explore the People Styles at Work model
• To discuss the clues to reading styles/types
• To relate the model to your own current influencing
scenarios and consider how to develop further your
interpersonal versatility
• To reflect on how you could use the model to
enhance your range of influencing skills
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Humours or temperaments
We need to look a lot more closely at
the pros and cons. The information we
have so far is insufficient. I’m not
convinced this is the right decision.
Let’s take it a step at a time and avoid
being hasty... There’s no sense rushing.
Much better to get things right
I want to get started as soon as
possible. If we don’t move quickly,
we’ll miss the boat! I don’t care what
the others think, I’m just going to get
on with it. I want to get some students
signed up as quickly as possible, then
we can plan the details
That’s interesting. Very interesting.
What a well put together set of ideas.
Quite different to Derek’s but equally
useful, I’m sure. Have you seen his
latest paper on student numbers? He’s
so dedicated, you know. Let me hear
how you’ve got on consulting staff
The ‘premiere’ student experience,
that’s what we’re going to offer.
Nothing less. Immersive, inclusive and
inspiring! We are going to reach out to
our target audience and meet them at
the point of need. After hearing our
pitch they’ll be left with a choice of one
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The four elements
We need to look a lot more closely at
the pros and cons. The information we
have so far is insufficient. I’m not
convinced this is the right decision.
Let’s take it a step at a time and avoid
being hasty... There’s no sense rushing.
Much better to get things right
I want to get started as soon as
possible. If we don’t move quickly,
we’ll miss the boat! I don’t care what
the others think, I’m just going to get
on with it. I want to get some students
signed up as quickly as possible, then
we can plan the details
That’s interesting. Very interesting.
What a well put together set of ideas.
Quite different to Derek’s but equally
useful, I’m sure. Have you seen his
latest paper on student numbers? He’s
so dedicated, you know. Let me hear
how you’ve got on consulting staff
The ‘premiere’ student experience,
that’s what we’re going to offer.
Nothing less. Immersive, inclusive and
inspiring! We are going to reach out to
our target audience and meet them at
the point of need. After hearing our
pitch they’ll be left with a choice of one
Earth
Water
Fire
Air
12
4
Hippocrates and Galen
13
Exquisitely balanced
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People Styles at Work... and beyond
• There are four people styles, none of which is better or worse
than any of the other styles
• Although each person is unique, people of the same style are
similar in important ways
• Each style has potential strengths and weaknesses that aren’t
shared by the other styles
• No style is more or less likely to be a predictor of success or
failure
• The behavioural patterns of each style tend to trigger tension
in people of the other styles
• Getting in sync with the style-based behaviours of the person
you are with helps reduce interpersonal tension, thereby
fostering well-functioning and productive relationships
(Robert Bolton and Dorothy Bolton, 1996)
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5
Focussed on behaviour
This approach to understanding people is distinguished
from many others in that it focuses on behaviour
rather than personality. Behaviour is what a
person does. When using this model, you
concentrate on what you see with your own eyes
and hear with your own ears. How fast does the
person walk? How much does he gesture? How
loudly does he speak? How much inflection does
he use? How much facial animation does he
show? By contrast, one’s personality includes inner
characteristics like beliefs, thoughts, motives, values,
attitudes, feelings, etc. as well as behaviours.
(Robert Bolton and Dorothy Bolton, 1996)
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17
18
Avoiding
TASK
SLOW
R
E
S
P
ANALYTICAL
DRIVER
O
N
S
A S S E R T I V E N E S S
V
E
N
AMIABLE
EXPRESSIVE
E
S
S
Autocratic
FAST
PEOPLE
Attacking
Avoiding
TASK
Autocratic
SLOW
R
E
DRIVER
ANALYTICAL
S
Efficient
Logical
Systematic
Decisive
P
Pragmatic
Thorough
O
Independent
Prudent
Serious
N
Candid
S
A S S E R T I V E N E S S
V
AMIABLE
EXPRESSIVE
E
Cooperative
Persuasive
N
Supportive
Enthusiastic
E
Diplomatic
Outgoing
Patient
Spontaneous
S
Loyal
Fun-loving
S
Acquiescing
Acquiescing
PEOPLE
FAST
Attacking
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Avoiding
TASK
Autocratic
R
E
DRIVER
ANALYTICAL
S Independent → poor
Prudent → indecisive
collaborator
P
Painstaking → nit-picky
Results orientated → impersonal
Task-orientated → impersonal
O Candid → abrasive
Systematic → bureaucratic
N Pragmatic → short-sighted
S
SLOW A S S E R T I V E N E S S FAST
V
E
AMIABLE
EXPRESSIVE
Diplomatic → conflict avoider
N Articulate → poor listener
Cautious → risk averse
Fast-paced
→ impatient
E
Supportive → permissive
Visionary → impractical
People-orientated → inattentive
S Fun-loving → distracting
to task
S
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Acquiescing
PEOPLE
Attacking
The real (received) message
Words 7%
Body Language
55%
Tonality
38%
Albert Mehrabian, 1981
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Reading the clues
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7
TASK
ANALYTICAL
DRIVER
R
E • “I will...”
• “Just do it”
S • Voice – loud and very fast
P • Leans forward
O • Intense eye contact
• Deliberate movements
N • Wants - power
S
SLOW A S S E R T I V E N E S S FAST
V
AMIABLE
EXPRESSIVE
E
• “I feel...”
• “I want...”
N
• “Do tell me your ideas”
• “Let’s do it”
• Voice – quieter and slower
E • Voice – loud and fast
• Leans back
S • Leans forward
• Good eye contact
• Good eye contact
S • Lots of gestures
• Regular gestures
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
“I think...”
“Do it right or not at all”
Voice – quieter and moderate
Leans back
Limited eye contact
Limited gestures
Wants - perfection
• Wants - peace
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• Wants - popularity
PEOPLE
Primary and secondary styles
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Self-assessment inventory
• Your people style is based on other people’s perceptions of you, not
on how you see yourself
• Therefore, in filling out the inventory, read each item from the
standpoint of the way you think other people see you
• Discipline yourself to be as objective as possible. Select those items
that, to the best of your knowledge, reflect the way other people
experience you
• This inventory consists of eighteen pairs of statements. Choose the
statement in each pair that you think most accurately expresses
how other people see you
• Force yourself to make a choice between each of the paired
statements
• Remember, there are no good or bad styles; there are only
differences among people.
(Robert Bolton and Dorothy Bolton, 1996)
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8
Self-assessment inventory
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Reading and flexing
• Adjusting or modifying your
style to match that of another
• Adapt – interpersonal versatility
• Mirror mood of colleague
• Speaking their language
• WMD – words, music and dance
• “When people of two styles don’t get along, the problem
isn’t incompatibility, it’s usually inflexibility” (Bolton &
Bolton)
• “Opposite” styles require most adapting
• Just remember, 75% of the world are not in your quarter
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Just the facts, please
Today, Josh is calling on Mac, a key colleague. As part
of his pre-call planning, Josh has concluded when he
calls on Mac, he will try to focus on details, cover
material slowly and methodically, and know the facts.
Josh will not try to excite Mac with creative ideas or
try to rush Mac into making a decision.
For Josh to be most successful, what “kind” of person
will Mac be?
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9
Driver – working with...
DO
DON’T
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
Focus on the present
Be brief and efficient
Get to the bottom line
Speak in terms of shortterm concrete results
• Give them options
• Let them feel in control
• Stress how the Driver will
‘win’ with your proposition
Focus on the long-term
Give too much detail
Be ambiguous
Beat about the bush
Get too personal
Get into a control contest
Back down, however, if you
believe you are right
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Expressive – working with...
DO
DON’T
•
•
•
•
•
• Get straight down to business
• Dwell on details
• Be impatient with side-trips
and creativity
• ‘Nit-pick’
• Be cool and impersonal
• Be too serious
• Talk down to them
• Put down their enthusiasm
and excitement
Focus on the future
Illustrate concepts with stories
Seek their ideas, input
Focus on the big picture
Show personal interest and
involvement
• Stimulate their creative
impulse
• Compliment them
• Stress how the Expressive will
stand out from others
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Amiable – working with...
DO
DON’T
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
Focus on tradition
Be flexible
Be easy and informal
Be personal and personable
Allow time to ‘feel good’
Emphasise a team approach
Talk about your
appreciation of people
• Stress how the Amiable can
be ‘safe’
•
•
•
•
•
Push for too much detail
Press hard to change things
Hurry them
Push for immediate
commitment
Be cool and impersonal
Confront them
Attack
Be dictatorial or autocratic
Show disloyalty
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10
Analytical – working with...
DO
DON’T
• Focus on past, present and
future
• Talk facts
• Show evidence
• Focus on detail and accuracy
• Be logical and well-organised
• Tell them exactly what you will
do and when
• Allow time to ponder
• Stress how the Analytical can
be assured of being ‘right’
• Be vague, inconsistent or
illogical
• Be intolerant of details
• Overlook the past
• Rush things
• Be too personal
• Be overly casual
• Appear to not be serious
• Press for immediate action
• Enthuse before making your
case
31
Influencing scenarios
• What has been happening?
• Style matching –
• Your style?
• Their style?
• How could you flex your approach?
32
Links to other theories
Bolton & Bolton
Driver
Expressive
Amiable
Analytical
Hippocrates/
Galen (370 BC)
Choleric
(Fire)
Sanguine
(Air)
Phlegmatic
(Water)
Melancholic
(Earth)
Plato (340 BC)
Guardian
Artisan
Philosopher
Scientist
Carl Jung
Director
Intuitor
Feeler
Thinker
Myers-Briggs
Extrovert/Thinker Extrovert/Feeler
Introvert/Feeler
Introvert/Thinker
Peter Drucker
Action Man
Front Man
People Man
Thought Man
Red
Yellow
Green
Blue
A A Milne
Rabbit
Tigger
Pooh
Eeyore
Push - Pull
Asserting (push)
Attracting (pull)
Bridging (pull)
Persuading (push)
Colours
(Insights Discovery)
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11
Push and pull behaviours
34
Can the smaller opponent win?
35
Key influencing styles
Push
Other
party
Pull
Objective
36
12
Evidence
Feelings
Logic
Basis of
appeal
Relationship
Precedent
Values
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Push / Pull Influencing Styles
ANALYTICAL
Persuading
PUSH
ENERGY
Making proposals using logic,
facts and rationalised data
Focus on winning minds
Focus on me and my solution
Focus on understanding
DRIVER
Attracting
Bridging
Using inspiration and
imagination, highlighting the
shared picture
Open, receptive, drawing.
Building trust
AMIABLE
Asserting
Driving, controlling, stating
your own expectations and
needs
PULL
ENERGY
Focus on winning hearts
EXPRESSIVE
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Open and hidden influence
Open influence can be seen in:
• Meetings
• Presentations
• Debates and discussions
• Reports and proposals
• Negotiations
• Performance management
• Process management
Hidden influence arises through:
• Changing image or behaviour
• Altering attitude
• Networking
• Non-verbal communication
• Nurturing relationships
• Counselling or mentoring
• Using story, metaphor and
analogy
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Concluding thoughts
• People have one thing in common; they’re all different
• When a relationship is right, details are negotiable;
When tension is high, details become obstacles
• All other things NOT being equal, people will STILL do
business with people they like
(Lee Iacocca, former Chrysler CEO)
• When 2 people meet, there are really 6 people present:
– Each person as seen by themselves
– Each person as seen by the other
– Each person in reality
(William James)
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Making ‘no’ become ‘yes’
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Individual reflection
• What insights have you gained into your own
style/type?
• How could you develop these insights further?
• What opportunities are there for you to use the
People Styles model in your leadership role?
• What is your main influencing challenge? What
clues are there regarding the ‘styles’ involved and
how will you flex your own style in response?
• How will you develop your interpersonal versatility?
• How could you use the model to develop others?
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14
Thank you for listening and
participating
Love others, and be kind to yourself
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