Sobriety in Stumptown
www.pdxaa.com Portland Area Intergroup April 2015 [email protected]​
825 NE 20th Ave, Portland, OR Volume 8, No. 4 ​
503­223­8569
APRIL NEWS: 4th and 7th Traditions Enlightenment
In Cooperation with Districts 25 and 27
How does your group’s autonomy affect AA as a whole? Does buying non­conference approved literature hurt or help AA as a whole? Where is your money best spent to help the still­suffering alcoholic? These questions and more will be answered at District 25 & 27’s 4th and 7th Tradition workshop. Lunch will be provided. April 25, 2015 ­ 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. Creator Lutheran Church: 13250 SE Sunnyside Rd, Happy Valley, OR 97015 See PDXAA.com/events/ for more information Potluck and Speaker Meeting
Presented by Portland Area Intergroup
The Portland Area Intergroup invites you to a potluck and fundraiser at Unity of Portland (same place as the monthly Portland Area Intergroup meetings). May 02, 2015 at 4 p.m. Unity of Portland: 4524 SE Stark St, Portland, OR 97215 1
See PDXAA.com/events/ for more information April Challenge from the PAI Chair:
Bring a Guest to the Portland Area Intergroup Meeting
Our Portland Area Intergroup Chair, Kathryn S., has issued a challenge to the Portland Area Intergroup: in the next three month, bring a guest. Think amount the amount how much further we could spread the message of PAI if we brought another person with us to hear it.Think about how many people we might be exposing to a level of service they’d never seen ­ warts and all. The person you bring might be your group’s next IGR or the next Corrections chair. Or maybe they’ll just have a better context to help explain an important issue to their group down the road. We’re not responsible for the results, but we are responsible to trying our best. April­June, first Sunday of the month, 7 p.m. Unity of Portland: 4524 SE Stark St, Portland, OR 97215
APRIL STORIES:
Letting-Go Lessons for Us Control Folk
by Barbara E. of Portland, OR One of the most difficult things a sponsor asks of a newcomer is to turn things over to a Higher Power. To let go. Especially if s/he has taken lifetime pride in being super­responsible at home, on the job or in outside activities. Boosting the energy it takes with booze. And not recognizing that many responsibilities belong to others—especially those adept at playing inept. Until the sponsor points out, that is, that failure to let go comes from a death grip on security in a world of uncertainties. (As if security exists.) Belief that no Higher Power will come through. That sponsor may also unmask the controller’s secret delight at things collapsing—at home, on the job, etc.—if they get sick. Or a desperate need to feel important, always fed by being told “what would we do without you.” Or the view that survival must be earned. It’s seen regularly in the program. 2
For instance, how many times has a group secretary held onto that job after a year out of fear the meeting will die? This despite the Group booklet recommending service positions be passed on so that others can stay sober with it. Or how about those with the facility’s key for six months slowly getting resentful at being “stuck” with perpetual opening­up and setup duties? Henry the Plumber’s remedy was using announcement time to get tough and say: “I’m leaving the key on the table. If nobody picks it up, there’ll be no meeting here next week.” It always got picked up. Or how about those regularly bringing cookies or other treats—and no gumption to ask for reimbursement? Resentment when nobody else follows suit usually leads to quitting the meeting and too often, leaving AA. We “meeting starters” are told that once a new group is six month’s old, all service positions (except treasurer) should be distributed to other members so ​
they​
can stay sober. A meeting is either going to “fly or die” and to let go of either fate. Hanging onto service positions beyond reason is a form of big­shotism which the literature warns us about. No one is indispensable in the fellowship of Alcoholics th​
Anonymous or AA would not be celebrating its 80​
year on June 10. Letting go in life on life’s terms runs counter to the outside world’s philosophy that each of us are “masters of our fates,” presumably, therefore, able to control the uncontrollable. Such as: ● Basketball teams ● Traffic
● Practicing alcoholics/addicts ● Jobs/Bosses
● Bus schedules
● Adult Children
● Significant Others Aging
● Sex ● Computers ● Climate Change
● Pet deaths ● People’s ailments/sadness
● Deadlines Now, Mother Nature lets go all the time. Rivers shift courses, depths and widths. El Niño’s strength varies. Ground shifts from earthquakes, tectonic shifts, underwater 3
volcanoes, surface water penetrations, and the like. Too, those who respect Nature, cooperate with her: farmers, mariners, miners, mountain climbers, environmental activists, smoke jumpers. For example, Viking ships were designed to absorb the North Sea’s terrific poundings, but their skippers like those today know the best of them still can be fooled and sink. Miners chip away carefully. Farmers cope with drought, pests, meteorological mischief, and market prices. The rest of humanity seems to think they have the power to ​
influence​
, ​
inspire, ​
and control​
. That they can make someone happy, sad, frightened, or bad instead of recognizing it’s an inside job. Newcomers learn quickly with new­found AA friends that they can’t stop someone from “going back out” or from suicide. Or get someone clean and sober. Or prevent that “permanent solution to a temporary problem.” Forget that old AA adage, “you can lead a horse to water, can’t make it drink, but can make it mighty thirsty.” The experienced 12­stepper knows the “soil” has to be fertile for seeds to grow and that, too, is an inside job. Control efforts in the Big Book involve that stage­managing analogy. It doesn’t have space to preface such a deed to cite other tactics: The whine. The bellow. The nag. The “suggestion.” The guilt trip. Playing victim. Soft­soap. Bribes. But the point is made that such deeds sap energy, stress, and sanity—and breed contempt for our fellow humans in or out of the program. Letting go is the antithesis of control. It has nothing to do with goofing off. It means to resign as the only person able to be a “Keeper of the Flame”—whatever it may be—and turning it over to the ​
real ​
Keeper: a Higher Power. After all, “nothing, absolutely nothing, happens in God’s world by mistake.” If we master letting go and trust that “H.P.” is truly in charge, we’ll sigh with relief when circumstances rip the reins from our death grip; when our best laid plans ​
do​
go awry. When we’re flattened, the body and mind finally get a vacation. If we’re teachable in our th​
4​
steps, we’ll learn about how and why we seize the responsibilities of others. That when we are stretched far beyond our “job description,” our duties get neglected. That the need to control is in direct proportion to fears nobody else is capable. Not even “H.P.” Yet the world does not stop spinning if we loosen that grip and trust that a Higher Power will make things come out right. Besides, letting go is actually exhilarating, rather than feeling like taking a roundhouse 4
to the ego. It provides appreciation of human foibles. (Life is not called a “human comedy” for nothing.) Letting go, makes us give others some slack from our hard­wiring of capability and pride. It fuels fewer resentments about bosses and co­workers. Indeed, in staging a major conference or family event, we may actually enjoy it if we spread the tasks around. We also may recognize that in complex orchestrations, it’s a given that at least three things ​
must​
go wrong for a successful event. Letting go on the job means becoming more resourceful, more energetic, and more open to new ideas. Our creativity is enhanced. We become a worker among workers—and more fun. Physically, letting go means conserving adrenalin and cutting stress to unbelievable levels. It cleans out the medicine cabinet while straightening out our lives. It also does wonders for alleviating the guilt, shame and insecurity we’ve packed around for a lifetime. Those who let go find they have more peace of mind, greater spirituality, a greater connection and trust in “H.P.” in the act of constantly surrendering unnecessary control. They become less afraid of people, places, and things. Instead of pushing against the river of life, they’ve relaxed and bobbed like a cork on it, enjoying the scenery and the trip. They may well live to be 100 in the bargain. Honesty, the Poem
by Rick R. Life wasn't going well for me when I showed up on the scene. But I was ready for the change, whatever that would mean. The life I'd lead was scandalous–I think you get the gist. And to get rigorously honest was the first thing on my list. When practicing this principle, I was brutal from the start. But that sometimes caused reactions, and it wasn't very smart. My wife asked me a question, while trying on some jeans, 5
“Did they make her look extended?” Well, I think you know what I mean. That put me in a quandary, and I knew I had to lie. If life has to be that rigorous, well, I guess I'm gonna die. I told a friend about it and he said, "you got it right.” Kindness trumps the rigorous clause, and you gotta keep it light. He gave a definition and for our purpose, I believe Kind honesty is devoid of all motives to deceive. It gives a little wiggle room and, I don’t think God would mind, if self­righteousness takes a little hit, if only to be kind. I've learned there are few absolutes, and my conscience is my guide, And I must put self­honesty first, when these thing I must decide. Peace of Mind and a Quiet Heart
by Rick R. In my early days of sobriety, in a small group in Los Angeles California, I was hearing a lot of words that were unfamiliar to me, but I didn’t pay much attention since I had bigger fish to fry. I had a drinking problem and everything else took a back seat to that. I was overwhelmed by marital, legal, responsibility, and economic problems. Words like love, patience, spirituality, and forgiveness were foreign to me and I didn’t see how they mattered when all I wanted to do was quit drinking. I stayed close to that group and the members started calling me the fortunate one. At the age of 28, I was the youngest one in that group and it stayed that way for quite a while as drug problems hadn’t evolved enough at the time (1969) to affect the influx of younger members. I felt like the elders of that group took a special interest in me and that endeared me to them in a special way. I was always listening for the magic word that would inspire me and give me a purpose in life and one day it happened. Tears come to my eyes when I recall the memory of the gentle voice of an old farmer named Harlan. As he talked about all of the trials and tribulations in the past, that he had endured, he explained how he had stumbled into 6
A.A. and that all the answers were there. But he didn’t understand it until he had a goal to reach for, and the next words that came out of his mouth changed my life forever. He said “All I want from life is peace of mind and a quiet heart.” The next thought that came to me was, what more could a person want? To this day, I still quote Harlan and credit him with the inspiration. He passed away in 2007 being sober 51 years. I have been through the big book and the 12x12 many times and have made a slow but very purposeful attempt to rid my mind of all the tormenting memories and regrets of the past, and as I processed each and every one of them, the more I realize that peace of mind is the natural result 0f living by these principals. Clearing away the wreckage of the past, changing the behaviors that caused that wreckage, and practicing unselfish behaviors, with the help of seasoned veterans like Harlan, I move closer and closer to the promise: “We will comprehend the word serenity and we will know peace.” My books are marked and highlighted over the years as I evolved through the step study meetings or checked out the references to the big book in the Daily Reflections. Recently I have been focusing on the word peace and underlining it, and it is amazing how often it is linked to other words that seem to get more attention. Peace of mind encompasses the spirit of recovery in Alcoholics Anonymous and I will be forever grateful that God saw fit to lead me to this wonderful program. Harlan, rest in peace and thank you for the inspiration. MONTHLY BUSINESS MEETINGS:
For details about monthly business meetings, contact the PAI Office at 503­223­8569. Or send your questions or concerns to​
​
[email protected]​
. nd​
Portland Area Intergroup (PAI​
): Business Meeting, 2​ Monday of every month, 7:00 PM, 4524 SE Stark St. (Unity of Portland), Portland. Portland Deaf Access Committee: ​
Monthly, 2nd Sunday of every month, 6:30, The Alano Club, NW 24th & Kearney. st​
th​
Dist 9​
: 1​
Wed, 6:30 PM, 24​
and Kearney, Portland Dist 10​
: Last Mon, 7:00 PM, 12945 Beaverdam Rd., West Side Service Cntr, Beaverton Dist 11​
: Last Thu, 7:00 PM, “URS” Club, Portland st​
​
Dist 12​
: 1​
Tue, 6:30 PM,​
12x12 Club, 7035 NE Glisan, Portland st​
th​
Dist 15​
: 1​
Wed, 6:45 PM, 710 6​
St., Oregon City 7
st​
th​
Dist 18​
: 1​
Sat, 9:30 AM, 215 N 6​
St., St. Helens st​
Dist 23​
: 1​
Tue, 6:00 PM, Emmanuel Presbyterian, 19200 SW Willamette Dr., West Linn st​
Dist 24​
: 1​
Thu, 6:15 PM, 2800 SE Harrison St., Portland nd​
nd​
Dist 26​
: 2​ Sun, 5:00 PM, St Charles Church, 5310 NE 42​
Ave., Portland st​
Dist 27​
: 1​
Mon, 7:00 PM, 11631 SE Linwood Ave., St. Paul’s Methodist, Milwaukie nd​
Dist 31​
: 2​ Tue, 7:00 PM, 937 NE Jackson School Rd., Hillsboro rd​
Dist 34​
: 3​
Sat, 5:00 PM, 485 Portland Ave., Gladstone nd​
th ​
Dist 35​
: 2​ & 4​
Sat, 7:00 PM, 18926 SW Shaw St., Suite A, Beaverton nd​
Dist 36​
: 2​ Thu, 6:00 PM, 2025 SW Vermont St., Portland nd​
Dist 37​
: 2​
Tue, 6:30 PM, 29775 SW Town Center Loop East, Wilsonville Committee News:
We have several committee positions available. Portland Area Intergroup needs your help.​
Working on a committee is excellent 12th Step service work. If you are interested in being on any Portland Area Intergroup committee, send an email to pdxaa.com with "COMMITTEE INTEREST" in the subject field. Or, just click on ​
Service on the Intergroup website. ​
Intergroup committees carry the message of recovery to the still­suffering alcoholic. ​
Please help yourself and others. Sign up. Thank you. Bridging the Gap (BTG):​
provides a one­time temporary contact for people transitioning from a treatment center to AA meetings. BTG meets the third Monday of each month at 6:30 PM at the Portland Intergroup Office basement, located at 825 NE 20th Ave, Suite 200, Portland. "We Bridge the Gap so alcoholics leaving treatment don't have to walk alone across that scary gap between the beginning of recovery in treatment and the continued recovery in AA.” Please contact the PAI office via phone, 503­223­8569, or email [email protected], if you are interested. AA Hotline: ​
The AA Hotline keeps the Portland phone number for AA active 24 hours a day, every day of the year. The way this is accomplished is by volunteer support. Calls to the AA number placed after Central Office hours and redirected to volunteers’ phones, keeping the volunteer’s number anonymous. A volunteer can elect to go on a 12th Step call or just provide the information the baller needs about meetings. Commitments are generally two times a month. Call the Central Office for more information at 503­223­8569. Corrections:​
​
Corrections is looking for a new chair.​
Our current focus is to carry the AA message to youths in the Multnomah County Detention Center. We need many volunteers to help bring AA meetings to the facility on a regular basis. Please contact the PAI office via phone, 503­223­8569 or email [email protected], if you are interested. Newsletter (​
Sobriety in Stumptown​
): ​
The committee for the very publication you are now reading is looking for members. Send an email of interest to 8
[email protected]. Events:​
The Events Committee needs committee members. Send an email to [email protected]​
for more information. Get Published! Submit your article, poem, artwork, rant, or performance art piece to ​
Sobriety in Stumptown​
. Deadline: 5/01/15 Send articles of 1000 words or fewer to: ​
[email protected]
Step Four
“Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.” Tradition Four
“Each group should be autonomous except in matters affecting other groups or A.A. as a whole.” Serenity Prayer
“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.” ­Reprinted with permission of AA World Services, Inc.
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