by Jane Bouterse
STRANGE
TravelingCompanions
T
eresa rose from the overstuffed
chair in which she was sitting to
greet me as I made my soggy
entrance into our meeting place. I had
never met her before, but I spotted her
immediately among the store’s patrons
simply because of her smile. She moved
Teresa Shope, and
husband, Wendy
(right), enjoy
their children and
grandchildren every
opportunity that is
given to them.
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ALT Magazine
briskly toward me as we spoke each
other’s name in inquiring greetings. She
was good company from the moment I
saw her even though our interview was
about her breast cancer. Teresa Shope is
one of 2.5 million women in North America
diagnosed with breast cancer—aggressive
ductile carcinoma, Stage 2A; sentinel
node biopsy, no lymph involvement.
She has undergone surgery, completed
chemotherapy in July and 3 weeks later
began her radiation. Here I am 9 months
down the road. I’m OK. I mean, don’t I
seem OK? She questions. Hopefully, I’ll
be back to normal. My kids [6 grands, a
son and daughter] and my husband say
I’m never normal. I told ‘em I might go sky
diving on my 60th birthday just because.
My grandkids say, “Oh Nana, you’re so
crazy.”
Maybe so, but 56 year old Teresa will tell
you in a heartbeat that she is one lucky
lady. She discovered the lump which just
appeared one morning in November after
an all clear from her July mammogram.
No one in her family has a history of any
cancer, but the surgeon told me there
was nothing I could have done to get it or
not to get it, she shrugs. I am over 50. If
you have to have cancer, though, breast
cancer is the best one to have. One thing
is for sure: paying attention to her body
has saved her life.
Everyone has just been great, Teresa
admits. She laughs as she tells
grandchildren stories about her hair loss.
Fifteen days after her chemo ended, a
friend came over and shaved her head
to avoid the rush of the 17th day fallout.
Sure enough, on the 17th day what hair
remained fell out like rain. Her 3 year
old grandson, Banks, like her other
grandchildren just accepted her hair loss,
so completely that when a bald friend
came to visit recently, Banks greeted
him with, “Oh, you forgot to put your
people she doesn’t know, but they are
not strangers. Breast cancer binds them in
that exclusive club to which her surgeon
referred. Support is crucial, Teresa
acknowledges. If people don’t come to
you, you seek it out. Many call her for
support because someone has said, “You
need to talk to Teresa.” Honestly, it’s not
as bad as I imagined it would be. God’s
been good to me. Yes, I’ve got cancer.
Yes, things have happened to me. But I
have so much to be thankful for. You worry
about your family. What would they do
without me?
For Teresa, life has changed in many
ways. Priorities now determine how she
will expend her reduced supply of energy.
Things that once seemed so important—
like cleaning her house or vacuuming
her patio—are easily pushed aside to
share some time with her husband or her
children or grandchildren. She and the
grandchildren often took camping trips to
Millwood—just them—and she is looking
forward to getting back and sharing some
of those special programs the kids so
enjoy.
sentence. Many of those changes are
due in large part to the Susan G. Komen
Race for the Cure. The Komen Race for
the Cure Series raises significant funds
and awareness for the fight against
breast cancer, celebrates breast cancer
survivorship, and honors those who have
lost their battle with the disease. In 2008,
Susan G. Komen for the Cure celebrates
the 25th anniversary of the Komen Race
for the Cure, the largest series of 5K runs/
fitness walks in the world, with well over 1
million participants since 2005.
hair on today.” When her 6 year old
granddaughter saw her for the first time
without her wig, Cara Anne observed,
“Nana, I’m not seeing any hair there.”
Well, the hair that is now returning is white
as snow. Maybe a future color…to be
decided.
Throughout her illness, Teresa has grown
to appreciate the importance of friends
and family and the support they provide.
Many, at first, looked at me kinda sad.
Eventually they would work around to
something like “But you look so good and
you’re so happy.”This is just a bump. I’m a
happy person. I’m fine. You can’t just not
talk about it. It’s your life. Occasionally,
I call my sister-in-law to whine a little,
and I talk to Terri (her daughter) a lot.
To her surprise, Teresa often hears from
My husband has been with me to every
doctor’s appointment. I think we’ve grown
closer. He makes me feel pretty when I’m
not—no hair, bloated from the meds or the
chemo. He has been like a rock.
So many changes have given me
patience. I really pay attention to my
body, and I can be good to myself without
feeling guilty. I can’t do all the things I
once did, so I do what I can and enjoy my
jigsaw puzzles. Now I eat a low fat diet
and walk 3 times each week. I even got on
the treadmill when all I could walk was 2.5.
I actually have a 90% chance the cancer
will not come back.
Race stays in the local community to fund
breast health education and breast cancer
screening and treatment projects.
What a change from even within Teresa’s
memory when any diagnosis of cancer
was considered an automatic death
How the Race Funds are Used
A minimum of twenty-five percent of the
net income from each domestic Affiliate
Race supports the
Komen for the Cure
Award and Research
Grant Programs, which
fund groundbreaking
breast cancer research,
meritorious awards and
educational and scientific
conferences around the
world. Up to seventy-five percent of the
net income from each domestic Affiliate
The American Cancer Society also
provides education and support for breast
cancer victims. Early detection is still the
best medicine. Note the following ACS
guidelines for women who show no breast
cancer symptoms:
•
Women 20 years of age and
older should be aware of benefits
and limitations of Breast Self
Examinations. (NOTE: Although
ACS recently amended their recommendations for monthly selfexaminations, many healthcare
professionals believe strongly in
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BSEs. Teresa saved her life with
her BSE discovery.)
•
Women 29-30 should have a
physical examination of the
breast at least every 3 years performed by a healthcare professional.
•
Women 40 and older should have
a physical examination of the
breast every year performed by a
healthcare professional.
•
Women 40 years of age or older
should receive a screening mammogram every year. (Teresa
noted that in her networking most
women had discovered their cancer via. a mammogram.)
•
Warning signs include changes
in skin texture, color, tenderness, thickening or swelling, size,
shape or symmetry of the breast.
Teresa Shope is exceptional not only
because of her heathy handling of her
medical issues, and the support of her
family and friends but also because of
her attitude. She is obviously one who
is experienced at practicing happiness.
My cup’s always half full, she admits.
Never empty. I’m a pretty happy person.
Grandkids are so much better. You can
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send ‘em home.
According to Phillip Moffit,
teacher and author of Dancing with Life:
Buddhist Insights for Finding Meaning
and Joy in the Face of Suffering, there
are three kinds of happiness. The first
and probably most familiar is the kind
that occurs when the external conditions
in your life are just as you’d like them
to be. The second kind of happiness
arises when life isn’t the way you’d like
it to be, but you feel fine nonetheless.
In this state even when you encounter
an unpleasant person or circumstance
unlike the way you would like it to be you
are not overwhelmed. Teresa says, Pray
hard for those people you don’t like. If
you pray for them hard enough, you really
can’t not like them. This kind of happiness
was essential when her diagnosis
had been confirmed, and she and her
family tearfully and fearfully prepared to
face their uncertain journey. Finally, the
third kind of happiness is when you’re
completely free of attachment to your
wants and desires. There is no “I” in this
state; neither are there boundaries. This
state is not reached without continued
practice. Once you learn that a different
type of happiness is possible, you become
more likely to experience it. Happiness is
not only more pleasant but also healthy
and becomes easier to maintain as it is
chosen and practiced.
Not a very interesting person?—as she
originally declared herself. To the contrary,
Teresa Shope is both interesting and
inspiring. Her traveling companions—
breast cancer and happiness—are indeed
a strange pair, but they assist her in being
a model as a breast cancer patient and
happy person by which all of our lives can
be improved. Certainly, as she continues
on that 5 year path toward her “Cancer
free” destination, we are fortunate to have
crossed her path to join her for a small
part of her journey.
Thanks, Teresa, for allowing us and so
many others to hitch a ride with you. Good
luck!