edition 19 November 2010
empower
Empowering TAC clients by sharing stories and information
Maintaining
friendships and
social networks
By Genevieve McMahon, Clinical Neuropsychologist
Friendship is born
at that moment
when one person
says to another:
“What! You too?
Thought I was the
only one.”
— C.S. Lewis
Acquired Brain Injury (or ABI)
is sometimes called ‘the hidden
disability’ and with good reason:
it often results in changes to thinking,
memory, behaviour and emotions
which may not be obvious to the
casual observer. Families can find
themselves living with someone who
thinks and acts in a very different
way to the person they knew before
the injury. The person with the ABI
can also often feel very different
following their injury and realise that
their life is fundamentally changed
from what it was.
One of the challenges often faced by
people who have had an ABI and their
families is that of social isolation: old
friends can be lost and new friends
can be hard to make. Friends and
acquaintances can tire of repetitive
conversations due to memory
problems, or may become wary
following an angry outburst over a
seemingly trivial matter. Even good
friends who have supported the family
through all the ups and downs can
find it hard to understand that some
changes in behaviour are a result of
the brain injury, especially when the
accident was a long time ago and the
person with the injury now looks fine.
• Not being able to drink alcohol due
to medications or reduced
tolerance means feeling excluded
at pubs or parties
• Don’t see workmates any longer
because of inability to return
to previous employment
• Reduced income and increased
expenses means that there is
no money for going out
• The demands of therapy and
doctors appointments mean there
is little time or energy left to keep
up with old friends
• No longer being able to drive
means not being able to get
to social activities
• Embarrassment, shame or fear
of rejection because of physical
or cognitive changes
Reasons behind shrinking social
networks include:
• Feeling that others can’t
understand or are not interested
in the brain injury
• Reduced tolerance to noise and
crowds mean that some social
activities are no longer enjoyable
• Life is so different now, that there
is no longer much in common with
many old friends
continue over page
A simple lunch date is a great way to stay connected with family and friends
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A family united
Some helpful ideas to stay connected
with friends and family include:
• Keep up some social routines
however simple – have a regular
catch up with a particular friend for
coffee, have dinner together as a
family once a week, keep up with
going to church or a social group
if you did before the injury
group meetings, pass on information
brochures, direct them to helpful
websites such as the Brainlink
website (www.brainlink.org.au)
in the park. Go shopping with a
friend at a small shopping strip at
a quiet time of the day rather than
going to a big, busy shopping centre
Our roving Empower reporter
meets
family,
• Take
any chance for a spontaneous
• Let friends
and the
familyinspiring
know what Reid
catch-up
– if you bake a cake, call
they
can
do
to
help
–
often
people
whose lives changed forever
when son Blair acquired aafriend
brain
to come and share it with you
don’t say or do things because they
are is
afraid
of doing
the wrong thing
injury in a car accident. This
their
story.
• Make time for fun and focus on the
• Be as forgiving and open minded
as you can with family and friends.
Don’t assume they will understand
what brain injury means or how
it has affected you or your family
member – others may misinterpret
brain injury related problems,
for example mistaking difficulty
remembering social engagements
for rudeness or disinterest
• Take opportunities to educate friends
and family – talk to them about your
experiences, invite them along
to information sessions or support
• Take opportunities to meet up with
other people who have been in the
same situation – you can learn a
lot from their experiences and you
can often talk about what has
happened to you without feeling
judged or strange
moment – decorate cupcakes with
the kids, enjoy some fresh air at the
park, hunt down a bargain at the
op shop
Remember the most important person
in maintaining friendships and social
networks is you!
(Editor’s note: Headstart is offering
an opportunity to do this. See below).
• Think of other ways of doing things
even if it is not exactly the same as
it was before the injury – if it is too
noisy in the pub to concentrate,
catch up with friends somewhere
quieter like a cafe or at a BBQ area
Giving families a
“Headstart” to reduce
social isolation
The Headstart Team based at the
Monash University Clinical Psychology
Centre runs group sessions with people
with brain injuries and their families to
discuss the common problems people
with a brain injury face and possible
solutions to these problems.
Every group session involves 5 to 7
families, who get together each week
for 12 weeks. In this way families can
learn from each others’ experiences,
knowledge and wisdom to help
improve coping skills and family
functioning. Getting to know and
relate to people who have been
through similar experiences is a great
benefit of the sessions.
Involving the whole group to tackle
common problems using a structured
problem solving approach is also
very effective.
Themes that have been frequently
discussed include coping with social
isolation, looking after yourself in times
of stress and staying connected with
friends and family.
Participants have said the group
sessions allow them to:
• talk in an open and honest way
• feel listened to and less judged than
anywhere else in their community
• feel accepted, have fun and share
a laugh
hEADSTART TEAM
If you and your family would
like further information on
Headway’s group sessions,
please contact Genevieve or
Amber on 03 9501 2428 or
visit www.cpc.monash.org
• make new friends and no longer
feel alone
The Headstart team aims to use this
feedback to provide evidence for a
program which aims to reduce some
of the negative impacts of brain injury
including social isolation.
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TAC Wheelchair
Challenge closest
on record
The closest race in the three year
history of the TAC Wheelchair
Challenge took place in May as part
of the Great Ocean Road Marathon.
Geelong’s Richard Colman and
Canberra’s Richard Nicholson raced
neck and neck throughout the 14km
challenge, which started and finished
in Apollo Bay, with Richard Colman
winning by just 4/100th of a second.
The first and only female to finish was
Geelong 18-year-old Jemima Moore.
Nine wheelchair athletes started the
event which has grown in popularity
since its inception in 2008, six
reached the finish line.
TAC Wheelchair Challenge
A jubilant Richard Coleman
On your marks...
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From wheelchair novice
to handcycle champ
Michael Taylor’s journey
“The terrain was difficult – gravel,
gutters, ramps. I kept falling out
of my chair,” he says.
Now, Michael has completed a
six-race aggregate in the National
Hand Cycle Series in Echuca Moama,
and just returned from Canada having
represented Australia in the 2010 UCI
Para-cycling Track and Road World
Championships. He was one of
16 Australian athletes to represent
the country.
The championships are a long way
from a life skills day at Royal Talbot
Rehabilitation Centre, where Michael
first tried hand cycling. He was looking
to try a new sport after a motorcycle
accident in 2003 left him paraplegic.
After one turn at hand cycling, Michael
was hooked.
“I had tried snow skiing, motorbike
riding, and finally, hand cycling. Once
I tried it, I didn’t look back. I enjoy
riding with the other guys. It’s a great
way to share experiences.”
Before his accident, he and his wife
Tina were developing a business and
he was working 13 to 14–hour days.
Michael was returning from a family
holiday when he had the accident.
“I was told about my injuries when I was
in hospital, but I could not remember
what I had been told. I kept waking
up and asking what had happened.”
Accepting that his life would never be
the same was challenging for Michael.
His wife was six months pregnant and
the prospect of being unable to walk
“I had tried snow skiing, motorbike
riding, and finally, hand cycling. Once
I tried it, I didn’t look back. I enjoy riding
with the other guys. It’s a great way
to share experiences.”
Michael in action
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Handcycling in the Victorian countryside
again was daunting. But the support
of fellow patients, who were only too
willing to wheel Michael around the
wards and answer any questions
about treatment, helped put in him the
right frame of mind for recovery.
“The other patients in hospital were
very helpful. They told me stories about
their treatment and took me for strolls
around the ward. They were happy
to talk and answer any questions.”
A move to the rehabilitation centre
and the birth of his daughter provided
further incentive to “learn something
different every day.”
Changing his outlook on life has been
one of Michael’s biggest challenges, but
also one of his biggest motivators.
“I still dwell on things. It’s disappointing
sometimes, but there’s nothing that
can be done. Life’s not over after
you’ve had an accident. It’s just
a different world. The quicker you
accept that, the better off you are.”
Like to learn more about
handcycling or think it might
be the sport for you?
Michael is one of the
organisers for the National
Handcycle Series contact
him on 0418 881 985 or email
[email protected]
visit websites www.
australianhandcycleracing.com
and www.handbikeoz.com
“Being at the Talbot was like another
step forward. I was in there for about
three months and learnt how to get
into a chair, how to sit, how to sit for
periods at a time, how to fall out, and
how to get back in. I also learned how
to get dressed in bed.”
Changing his outlook on life has been
one of Michael’s biggest challenges,
but also one of his biggest motivators.
Michael credits his family and friends’
support for helping him move from an
amateur to a professional hand cyclist.
“The world is still open and it’s a
chance to look outside the box. If you
want to do something, you need to
work out how to get there.”
Handcycling
Australia
Canada bound – A happy Michael Taylor
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Young talent
bounces back
Wheelchair basketballer Jannik Blair
If ever there is a role model for
bouncing back after an accident,
Jannik Blair is your man.
The 18-year-old has achieved many
great things since breaking his back
in a car accident six years ago.
Back in 2002, Jannik was driving his
grandfather’s utility in a dirt paddock
when it flipped and rolled. His friend
was also in the car when the accident
happened. Jannik broke both his back
and wrist, suffered a collapsed lung
and was placed in an induced coma
for a week. He then spent a further
two weeks in rehabilitation.
Cup. But even better than that, he is
now at the University of Missouri on
a partial scholarship that will see him
play in the United States wheelchair
basketball league.
The competition is tough. Jannik will
train each morning to ensure he’s
up to the league’s 48-game season.
Meanwhile, he will study a preengineering degree.
“It’s exciting, but also a little scary. It’s
a whole new world, a whole new life.”
Did the accident change his life?
Of course, but it did not stop him
pursuing his dream of becoming
a successful sportsman.
Wheelchair
basketball
To get involved in wheelchair
basketball contact Wheelchair
Sports Victoria on 03 9473 0133
or visit www.wsv.org.au.
For more information on
the Dandenong Rangers
call Andrew O’Brien on
03 9794 7192 or visit www.
dandenongbasketball.com.au
“I don’t think it was too bad after the
accident. I actually found the
adjustment okay.”
Jannik always “wanted to go further”
in sport while he was at school.
He did not let the accident hold
him back. After the accident, he tried
hand cycling, track racing and then
wheelchair basketball.
“Basketball was
the winner. I enjoy
team sports.”
Jannik joined the Victorian under-14
wheelchair basketball team and then
moved into an under-18 side, before
training with the Dandenong Rangers
team. The only way was up with
Jannik receiving an invitation to train
with an Australian wheelchair
basketball men’s squad. This would
see him compete in the under-23
world championships in Paris.
In May this year, he was part of the
‘Australian Rollers’ – a national men’s
wheelchair basketball team that came
third in the 2010 Paralympic World
Jannik represents the Dandenong Rangers
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Steve’s best day
Story by Nia Karahisarlis
Late last year, my brother Steve took
a big step forward and took part in
‘Spring into Shape’. The event was
a 5km walk around the Yarra River
in the CBD.
Steve had set this event as a
rehabilitation goal and he trained three
times a week in the gym in the lead
up to the event.
Steve wasn’t confident that he would
be able to complete the 5km walk,
but he was determined to give it a go.
He had the support of his physician,
Doctor John Olver, his carer, Mekete,
and the physio team at the
Epworth Hospital.
On the day he was surrounded by
many other competitors and was
nervous. The start gun went off and
so did Steve and Mekete. Along the
way there were a few stops but Steve
could see the finish line and wasn’t
going to give up. Other people
walking and running past encouraged
him to keep going. And keep going
he did – all the way to the finish line.
It was an enormous achievement for
Steve as he had to overcome many
physical and mental obstacles to
complete the walk. It was rewarding
and helped build his confidence
toward moving forward in his long
recovery. Steve had a horrific accident
that has changed his life but has not
stopped him from achieving things
and doing the things he wants.
Steve continues to improve and has
continued to do regular events with
his carer. I hope this inspires all who
think, at any stage, that something
is not possible after a serious injury.
This is a true story about someone
who, through determination, achieved
his goal.
Steve and Mekete cross the finish line
In Steve’s words, “It was the best day.”
Steve enjoying the walk
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rtss-(ge
Upcoming events
20
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flyer2:L
ayout 1
28/7/10
4:35 PM
10th a
nnual
Page 1
Time f
or Rem
em
bering
&21
november
Accessibility
Australian
centre
for
ART
contemporary
Bendigo
tramways
Weekend
Road Tra
uma Supp
ort Servic
remembe
es invites
r those w
you to
ho have d
have bee
ied, those
n injured,
who
and the im
our comm
pact on
unity of ro
ad traum
a.
Free entry for people with disabilities and their carer
Chinese
central
museum
Deborah
gold
mine
city
at old
Discovery
museum
Geelong
wool
gum san
chinese
heritage
golden
museum
IMAX
melbourne
gallery of
Victoria
Aquarium
Island
Churchill
Island
Heritage
museum
Phillip
Phillip
KOALA
centre
Conservation
botanic
Road Tra
uma Sup
port Ser
free pro
vices off
fessional
ers
counsellin
to anyone
g and sup
affected
port
by road
Freecall
trauma.
1300 36
7 797
GARDENS
cranbourne
surfworld
SCIENCE
Farm
ROYAL
Island
PENGUIN
parade
Island
You are
invited to
bring a sm
all framed
or other
photo of
symbol of
your love
remembr
d one
ance
Phillip
OLD
Gippstown
sports
se, Melbo
and for fu
rther infor
urne
mation pl
ease cont
act 9877
7922
national
museum
national
12:00pm
Sunday
21 Nove
Queen’s H
mber 20
all, Parlia
10
ment Hou
To RSVP
Immigration
Museum
theatre
melbourne
Centre
melbourne
Centre
dragon
museum
skydeck
Technology
Cottage
treasury
Eureka
Science and
Cooks’
Torquay
works
Wildlife
Proudly sup
ported
wonder
by
land
20 & 21 November
Accessibility Weekend
About Accessibility Weekend
As part of Spinal Cord Injury Awareness
Week, major Victorian tourism
attractions will open their doors for
free to people in wheelchairs and their
carers for Accessibility Weekend.
The initiative aims to showcase venues
who are ‘Doing it Right’ and being
accessible for people in wheelchairs.
About Spinal Cord Injury Awareness Week
Spinal Cord Injury Awareness Week will
take place between 15-21 November
2010. Proudly sponsored by the TAC,
the week is designed to raise
awareness and promote the prevention
of spinal cord injury. This year we have
an extensive program of activities
including Accessibility Weekend.
Please see our website for details:
www.independenceaustralia.com.
About Independence Australia
Independence Australia is a not-forprofit organisation that supports
people with a spinal cord injury or
other physical needs to achieve their
optimal quality of life.
For further information about any
of these activities, visit
www.independenceaustralia.com
or call our Communications
Department on 1300 704 456
or email communications@
independenceaustralia.com
Phone
1300 654 329 or 1800 332 556
(toll free outside the Melbourne metro area)
Monday to Friday 8:30am to 5:30pm
website
Visit www.tac.vic.gov.au
Empower is published three times a year by the Transport Accident
Commission. © Transport Accident Commission, 2010
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