DRAMA CLUB SCRIPT
Spring 2015
Monday
8-10s
Capulets: Cas, Aaron,
Montegues: Hugh, Oscar
Hugh: it's such a hot day, I could really do with some gelato
Oscar: Hey look they're some Capulets over there!
Hugh: go on bit your thumb at them, I dare you
Oscar: Alright watch this.
Cas: did you bite your thumb at us, sir
Oscar: is it illegal if I say yes?
Hugh: yes of course it is!
Oscar: I did bite my thumb sir, but not at you sir
All Montagues: you lie!
SWORD FIGHT!
Charo: Stop! Thrice you have disturbed the peace! If it ever happens again that's it!
Everyone walks
Leon looks miserable
Ksenia: Alright misery guts, what's up this time?
Leon: I'm thinking about Rosalind
Ksenia: it was Rosalind last week and the week before! You need cheering up, who knows
where the party is? I know where the party is. Who knows where the party is?
All: Mercuchioooooo
Aaron: where's this party then Mercuchio?
Ksyenia: the Capulet's house
All: what?
Charo: we can't go there we will be killed!
Oscar: Yeah you know the Capulets hate the Montagues
Mercuchio: guys chill out, everything is under control, it is a masked ball, no one is going to
recognise us. Ok?
All: OK
Capulets house
Mercuchio: see Romeo, I told you it would be a good party. you know what you need to do is
start talking to girls, Rosalind is never going to fancy you.
Leon: ok I fancy that one (pointing to Juliet)
(They rhubarb n custard)
Aaron: Pssst dad I wanna talk to you. I think that is Romeo talking to Juliet. He shouldn't be
here I am going to kill him
Lucia: Whoa Tybalt! I've heard that is actually a nice boy. Be calm and relax
(Dancing)
Stop! I'm very old, my feet are tired, I've got blisters on my feet, haven't you all got homes to
go to? It's bed time!!
I'm old I'm very very old
All exit. Sighing.
(The balcony)
Charo: I'm on a balcony. Romeo Romeo wherefore art thou Romeo!
Hugh: shhh she doesn't know this but I'm hiding in a bush... 321 tadaaaaaar
Charo: wow Romeo have long have you been there?
Hugh: never you mind, Juliet I love you and I really want to marry you
Charo: wow you work quickly, ok send me a letter and I might think about it !
(Friar scene)
Oscar: oh hello I'm very sorry I didn't see you there. Now I'm going to take the opportunity
to tell you that as a friar i really like gardening...
look there are some herbs that make you very ill
There are some herbs that smell
There are other herbs that just taste so good.... Gardening is my favourite thing to do when
I'm not... Praying or looking after my mentees like Romeo. Oh talking of Romeo here he
comes.
Hi Romeo are you ok?
Hugh: Oh friar I'm so in love
Oscar: Is it that Rosalind again? She is just never going to fancy you.
Hugh: No no who is that?
Hugh: I'm in love with Juliet!
Oscar: Not Juliet Capulet?
Hugh: Yes, and I want you to marry us!
Oscar: Mmmmmm yeh ok. A marriage between the Montagues and the Capulets may mean
there is less fighting. We shall do it this afternoon.
(Marriage)
Oscar: I now pronounce you husband and wife
Aaron: oi there's Romeo over there, I saw him talking to my cousin Juliet at the party
Lyon: ooooo are you going to bite your thumb at him?
Aaron: no I'm going to do far worse.... Romeo on guard
(Leon steps back)
Hugh: Tybalt it's ok.... Your like a brother from another mother
Aaron: What I don't understand you! Prepare to die!!
Ksenia: Romeoooooooooooooooooooooooo nooooooooooooooooooooooo
Hugh: how very dare you! Pick on someone your own size..... Sorry Mercutio, no offence
Ksenia: none taken
(Tibult dies)
Hugh: oh no what have I done! Time to make a sharp exit.
Charo: what a mess, what has happened here?
Oscar: oh hi sir.... Tybalt killed Mercutio, so Romeo killed Tybalt. He looked really angry
Charo: I've had enough of this. Will someone tell Romeo that he's not welcome in Verona
anymore
Lucia: But sir it's dangerous out there, there is a lot of plague
Charo: I don't care, not my problem any more
All: ooooooooo
Plague scene
Ksenia: This is terrible how could things get so bad, Romeo has killed my cousin and he's
banished will I ever see my husband again.
Aaron: Juliet
Ksenia: Hi Dad
Aaron: you look really upset and I've got just the thing to cheer you up, on Wednesday
you're going to get married to Paris...
Look he perfect for you, he tall, just that little bit older than you and he's really rich
Ksenia: oh Noooo
Aaron: see I told you she'd be happy!
Oscar: Hi Juliet
Ksenia: Hi friar
Oscar: I couldn't help but over hearing, and I have just the solution..
Ksenia: oh thank goodness for that tell me.
Oscar: I've crushed up some herbs. If you drink this you will look dead then I'll send a
message to Romeo so he will find you and you can live happily ever after
Ksenia: Brilliant! What could possibly go wrong!?
(Oscar makes paper aeroplane)
Oscar: Right the last thing I have to do then is send this message..
(Throws plan)
Hugh: oh what's that...? It's probably nothing.
Oscar: oh hi friar John,
Lucia: Good afternoon, hey I wonder if Romeo knows that Juliet has died. I must go and tell
him..
Romeo, I've got some serious news for you! Juliet Is dead!
Hugh: Noooooooooooo!!!!!
Lucia: Sorry, I give you my condolences. Bye. Oh, there's the Capulet family tomb. That's
where Juliet is. So sad.
Hugh: Hello apothecary, hello poison shop owner. I would like some poison that will kill me
Charo: Sorry I can't sell you that, it's illegal
Hugh: but there's so much plague here anyway and I can pay double
Charo: Well business is a bit slow, here but don't tell anyone
Hugh: To Verona!!
(Family tomb)
Hugh: shhh I shouldn't be here this is the Capulet family tomb. And here is Juliet, my love.
Leon: shh I shouldn't be here this is the Capulet family tomb. And here is Juliet, my love.
Hugh: my love
Leon: my love
Hugh: my love
Leon: my love
Hugh: Romeos love
Leon: Romeos love
Hugh: hahahahahahahah
Leon: oh
(Hugh does a delicate step over Juliet, and kills Paris).
Hugh: Juliet, my love. The last thing I have to do is join you in death! 123
(And drinks poison, standing up.... He falls down whilst Juliet gets up)
Ksenia: Ah that was a nice sleep, right only thing to do is to find Romeo. Ah Romeo! The only
thing to do is to join you in death. Oh happy dagger.
Charo: Oh no Romeo and Juliet are dead! I better tell their parents. Montegue,
Lucia: Present
Charo: Capulet
Arran: present
Charo: look
Arron and Luisa gasp.
Oscar puts finger to lip
Oscar: I can't help thinking that this is somehow my fault
All: hmmm
Charo: I have a brilliant solution
All: what?
Charo: we shall build a statue of Romeo and Juliet.
Bow