P2 Writing Workshop
6 February 2015
6.00 – 7.30 p.m.
inspiring a future-ready, anchor-steady community that flourishes and thrives
FAQs
Addressing your needs & concerns
• What are some issues you face when getting
your child/ward to write?
• What do you want to gain from the Writing
Workshop?
FAQs
Key needs & concerns
•
•
•
•
•
Does not know where to start
Construction of proper sentences
Express or describe in more details
Linkage of story in paragraphs
To be more creative in their writing
The Fundamental (1)
Sentence Building
• Use the 5W an 1H to guide you!
The Fundamental (1)
Sentence Building (classroom example)
• Use the 5W an 1H to guide you!
Who
What
• I have a pen.
Who
Adjectives
What
• I have a new blue pen.
Who
Adjectives
What
How
• I have a new blue pen that I bought from the
Where
When
bookshop yesterday.
The Fundamental (1)
Sentence Building (classroom example)
• Use the 5W an 1H to guide you!
Who
How
• I was angry.
Who
How
Who
• I was angry at my sister.
Who
How
Who
Why
• I was angry at my sister because she snatched my
Where
When
book while I was reading at home last night.
The Fundamental (2)
Using Adjectives
• Use as many adjectives and descriptive words
as you can.
– I have a pen
– I have a green pen.
– I have a new green pen.
– I have a new green erasable pen.
– I have a new green erasable pen that I use for
corrections.
The Fundamental (2)
Using Adjectives – Using Your Senses
• Use relevant adjectives and descriptive words:
– Feelings
• The pupils were excited to see Fandi Ahmad in school.
– Size
• The petite teacher needed help to carry the big box.
– Shape
• The square peg could not fit into the round hole.
– Characteristics (Properties)
• The teacher needed help to carry the big heavy box
– Colours
• The man wearing the striped shirt drove off in a blue car.
– Taste
• The dish was delicious.
Hands-on (1)
Sentence Building
• Using the 5Ws & 1H and as many relevant
adjectives and descriptive words as you can,
extend the sentence below with more details.
– I have a car.
The Fundamental (3)
Using adjectives that are NOT common
• Happy, happy, happy till teacher marking NOT
happy
• Angry, angry, angry till teacher marking really
gets angry
The Fundamental (4)
Connectors
• Then, then, then, then, then … the whole story
(e.g. of Making a Healthy Salad)
• Vary the connectors used
–
–
–
–
–
First, Secondly
After that,
Next,
Following that,
Time indicators – At midnight, In the morning,
• Starting sentences with And, Because…….
encouraged
not
Hands-on 2
Using adjectives that are NOT common
• List alternatives to the common adjectives
expressing feelings:
Happy
Angry
Hungry
Beautiful
Afraid
Delighted
furious
starving
pretty
nightmare
Excited
mad
famished
awesome
fear
Beaming
unhappy
craving
nice
spooky
Glad
agitated
greedy
stunning
timid
amused
crossed
empty
classy
doubtful
joy
annoyed
peckished
attractive
anxious
elated
irritated
charming
frozen
frustrated
Gorgeous,
lovely
Trembling with
fear
• Group Sharing
Hands-on 3
Using different connectors and adjectives
• Write a short paragraph to describe your day today using
different connectors and adjectives
I woke up at six in the morning. After taking a bath and having
breakfast, I rushed off to work to avoid the morning rush hour traffic.
When I reached my office, I had a meeting. Next, I had to type an urgent
report for my boss and then, I was off to lunch. Following lunch, I was
very sleepy and managed to catch a nap for about half an hour. In the
afternoon, I had to deal with so much work that I lost track of time.
When the clock struck five, I was dumbfounded and realised that I had
to rush to Westwood Primary. Finally, I reached the school just in time to
attend this wonderful and interesting workshop!
• Group Sharing
The Writing Process
inspiring a future-ready, anchor-steady community that flourishes and thrives
The Language Experience Process - MLEA
Providing the Scaffolding
Providing the language experience
Carrying out the
relevant activity
– Learning
Journey, activity
in school,
reading a story
Brainstorming ideas as a class - recounting
Group discussion
Class writing
eliciting
Group Writing Individual Writing
sentences from
pupils
The Writing Process
INTRODUCTION
Brainstorm
Plan
DEVELOPMENT - BODY
Write
Revise
CONCLUSION
Edit
Publish
Composition Writing
Term 1 Week 3
A Bubble Blowing Adventure
inspiring a future-ready, anchor-steady community that flourishes and thrives
A Bubble Blowing Adventure
Helping words/ phrases
bubble wand
excited
quarrel
burst
terrified
scold
pulling
apologised
BRAINSTORMING
Writing Stimulus
To enhance any writing piece, we will brainstorm
on a related topic before beginning to write…
Topic
• Write about how you felt when you first blew
bubbles
• Use as many adjectives and descriptive words
as you can.
PLAN
• Use the 5W an 1H to guide you to plan your
content for each picture:
• Introduction – Character & setting
• Body – Problem & Solution
• Conclusion – what happened in the end, how
you or the characters felt…
Picture 1
Who: _________________________
When: _________________________
Where:
__________________________
What:
__________________________
It was a bright and cheery day. The leaves on the
trees were rustling in the afternoon breeze. Mary and
Sarah were at the park blowing bubbles. There were four
boys playing at the playground.
Picture 1
I was cleaning my room when
my eyes fell on the broken bubble
wand. Memories of that horrible day
flooded my mind as I recalled what
happened.
“Peiling! Peiling! Let’s go down to the newly built
playground to play on the swings,” shouted Xinyi.
Picture 2
What had happened?
________________________________
________________________________
What were the children doing?
________________________________
________________________________
When the boys saw the bubbles, they were very
excited. The bubbles were like hundreds of little footballs
floating magically in the air. The boys were jumping up and
down trying to catch the bubbles.
The boy in striped shirt asked Mary, “Can I borrow
your bubble wand, please?”
Picture 2
Soon the
bubbles attracted a
group of rowdy boys
who were playing in
the playground.
They came over and
started bursting the
bubbles . . .
While Peiling and Xinyi were
playing excitedly, John and his gang
came to mock at them. They teased
the girls that blowing bubbles was
extremely childish! Peiling and Xinyi
chose to ignore them. John was so
frustrated that he started to burst the
bubbles. The rest of the boys except
Tim saw the fun in bursting the
bubbles and they started to join John.
Tim politely asked to borrow the wand
from Peiling.
Picture 3
Who:
_____________________
Why:
________________________
Feelings of the character:
_________________________
Mary agreed to lend him the bubble wand. When he
was about to blow, suddenly, another boy snatched the
bubble wand! All the boys started to quarrel and fight over
the bubble wand. When they were pulling the bubble
wand, the wand broke! Mary and Sarah were terrified and
burst into tears.
Picture 3
Then to my horror,
the group of rowdy boys
snatching the bubble
wand. The wand broke
into two! I burst into
tears. Soon, a man
appeared.
John quickly snatched the
wand from Tim and scolded him
for betraying the boys! They
started pulling and pushing each
othe and a fight broke out! The
girls were so terrified that they
burst into tears.
Picture 4
What happened in the end?
_________________________
How did the children feel?
_________________________
Mary’s father heard them crying. He ran over
and scolded the boys furiously. The boys felt sorry and
apologised to the girls and each other. They promised
to buy Mary a new bubble wand!
Picture 4
Uncle Raymond,
who was a retired police
officer, saw the whole
scenario and came to
reprimand the boys. He
warned the boys not to fight
again! The boys felt guilty
and they apologised to one
another as well as to the
girls
The man reprimanded
the boys. They were
remorseful. They apologised to
my sister and I. We forgave
them as our father always
reminded us that forgiveness is
very important.
Back in my room, I
smiled to myself. I wiped the
dust off the wand gently. It was
a memorable incident indeed
WRITE / REVISE
Success Criteria
Success Criteria:
1
2
3
4
1. I described the events in order and wrote in
complete sentences.
Rarely
Sometimes Most of the
time
All the
time
2. I used past tense when describing the
events.
3. I used connectors to organise the ideas /
events.
4. I used the first person (I, We) and the third
person (he, she, they) correctly.
5. I have written enough sentences ( at least 16
sentences) including details that describe how I
(or the characters ) felt and thought.
Rarely
Sometimes Most of the
time
All the
time
Rarely
Sometimes Most of the
time
All the
time
Rarely
Sometimes Most of the
time
All the
time
6. I spelled the words that I have learnt
correctly, and used spelling strategies for new
words.
Rarely
With
With
limited partial
details details
With most of
the details (at
least 16
sentences)
Sometimes Most of the
time
Very
thoroughly
, in-depth
(at least 16
sentences)
All the
time
EDIT
The Editing Process
• Whole –class guided editing
• Pair editing – using success criteria
• Individual editing - self-check using the success
criteria / composition checklist
EDIT
Success Criteria Checklist
• Exchange your writing piece with your friend
• Use the Success Criteria checklist to help your
partner to improve on his/her writing
• Focus (example): Replace common words with
Star Words
Common Words
Star Words
good
fantastic
bad
terrible
hungry
famished
Composition (50min) – 80 words
Composition Checklist
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
Have at least 3 paragraphs.
Use Interesting beginnings, e.g. a sound or dialogue.
Use correct punctuation – capital letters, full-stop.
Use past tense.
Include adjectives and adverbs.
Have correct spelling.
Include at least one sentence of dialogue.
Read your story once you have finished.
Writing Conventions
• Spacing
– between words
– between punctuation marks and words
• Correct spelling of High Frequency Words,
• Punctuation of dialogue,
• Capitalising on beginnings of sentences and
Proper Nouns (names of people, places etc)
Current Challenges
• Pupils using “Singlish” & everyday speak:
– Sam and John got too impatient….
– I got money…
• Pupils using short forms, SMS & email languages
– OMG, Sara realised…
– The pupils lol when they saw the funny incident.
– Ok, gd
Simple Writing Tips to Remember
1. Spell the numbers (not Math!)
– There were 2 two girls at the playground
2. Give the characters simple names
– Sara and Jan were at the playground…..
3. Expressions of feelings should NOT be limited to
the conclusion
Extension
Stretching pupils in writing….
inspiring a future-ready, anchor-steady community that flourishes and thrives
Beginnings
Introduction
Begin your story in an interesting
and exciting way.
Arouse curiosity with the following
techniques:
Extension (1)
Open with Story Grabbers
a Question
a
Quotation
Personal
feelings
a
Movement
Personal
Experience
Describing
the setting
Introduction – Story Grabbers
a Question
“Why must this always happen to
me?”
a
Quotation
“Blood is thicker than water!” I
muttered to myself …
a
Movement
Crash! My grandfather tumbled down
the staircase.
Introduction – Story Grabbers
Personal
Experience
I was cleaning my room when my eyes fell
on the broken bubble wand. Memories of
that horrible day flooded my mind as I
recalled what happened.
Personal
Feelings
I love my family very much that I will do
anything for them.
Describing
the setting
It was a bright and cheery day. The azure
blue clouds moved gently across the sky
and the leaves on the trees were rustling
in the afternoon breeze.
Extension (2)
Good “Hooks” for stories
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
•
Begin with a “Wow” word …Help! Ouch! Yikes!
Guess what I got to do (where or when) …?
You won’t believe what happened (where or when) …?
You’re never going to believe this!
(When) was the best / worst day of my life?
I was so (feeling word – embarassed, excited, angry)…!
I don’t think I’ve ever been so …(feeling word)…!
The most amazing thing happened (where or when) …?
• What a/an (feeling word – boring, exciting) weekend!
• I love (activity word – reading, soccer, skating)…!
• Have you ever been ……….?
Hands-on 4
Writing an introduction using a “story grabber” or “hook”
horror
movie
slept
alone
trembled in
fear
Monster chasing
tossed and
turned
mother
finally
comforted
Hands-on 4
Writing an introduction using a “story grabber” or “hook”
________________________________________________
________________________________________________
________________________________________________
________________________________________________
A Nightmare
________________________________________________
- Picture 1
________________________________________________
________________________________________________
________________________________________________
________________________________________________
Improving content
Using our 5 senses in writing
How writing assignments are graded
Writing
Content
Language
Why pupils struggle with content?
• Lack of vocabulary
• Weak at spelling
• Lack of ideas
• Weak at imagination
• Inability to elaborate
Why pupils struggle with content?
• Lack of vocabulary
• Weak at spelling
• Lack of ideas
• Weak at imagination
• Inability to elaborate
Problem
Pupils only rely on 1 sense - Sight
• All of us have 5 senses (sight, hearing, smell, taste,
touch)
• When pupils look at the pictures, they only write
down what they see.
• Hence, their ability to describe is limited.
Using all our senses in writing
Leading questions you can ask to guide children
5 senses
Sight
Hearing
Taste
Smell
Touch/
feelings
5 Questions
“What do you see?”
“What sounds can you hear?”
“Any tastes?”
“Any smells/aromas?”
“How do the characters feel? Any
sensation?”
Example of relying on sight only
Jane and I were blowing
bubbles. Some boys
started to burst the bubbles.
One boy asked me for
my bubble wand and solution.
Writing down what they see
only makes the content boring
and bland!
Example of using all 5 senses
Jane and I were blowing bubbles.
The bubbles had a soapy smell
(smell). Some of the bubbles had
rainbow colours in the sunlight
(sight).Some boys started to burst
the bubbles. “Pop! Pop! Pop!”
(sound) The bubbles burst. One of
the bubbles popped near my
mouth. It tasted bitter (taste).
“Yucks! (sound)” I cried. One boy
asked me for my bubble wand and
solution rudely. I cried in fear
(touch/feelings).
Key idea: Getting pupils to elaborate
• When pupils engage all 5 senses, they can
imagine more.
• This will boost their content as they will be able to
give vivid descriptions and elaborate on what they
‘see’ from the pictures.
• Constant reinforcement of this strategy trains the
child to be better writers in the long-run.
Extension (3)
Using descriptive vocabulary, idioms, similes etc
• The teacher’s face turned beetroot red …
• Tom’s face was as white as a sheet…
• Johnny felt like he was in seventh heaven
when he saw that he had full marks in his class
test.
• Danny’s mother was furious because he had
forgotten his pocket money for the third time!
• I was drenched from head to toe …
• The girls stood rooted to the ground …
Endings
Conclusion
Good endings give your reader the
feeling he has not wasted his time
reading. Unless the ending is given
in the question itself, think about your
ending before you write it.
“Begin with an end in mind”
1. Relate how events finally turned out
after a series of tense or difficult incidents.
With his usual playful smile on his lips, Steven continued
walking home with a bounce in his steps. His parents
were going to be so happy!
“Everything’s fine now, mom!” he answered happily,
much to Mother’s bemusement. Everything was going
to be just fine.
Back in my room, I smiled to myself. I wiped the dust off
the wand gently. It was a memorable incident indeed
“Never, Never again!” I cried to myself as waves of
remorse engulfed me. I have learnt my lesson.
Links for further tips on Writing
Various Story Starters:
http://www.scholastic.com/teachers/story-starters/
Idea Generation Tool (Cube):
http://www.readwritethink.org/classroomresources/student-interactives/cube-30057.html
Generating Ideas for various Text-Types:
http://www.edu.gov.on.ca/eng/studentsuccess/thin
kliteracy/files/writing.pdf
Acknowledgement
For input & guidance
•
Ms Tracy Tan, Vice-Principal
•
Mrs Adrena Ong, Head of Department / English
Language
•
Ms Yong Lee Min, Head of Department / Talent
Development & Aesthetics
•
Ms Tiey Huay Yong, Senior Teacher
Excerpts used from the composition written by
•
Glendon Gan, 2 Kindness
•
Rainnie Tan Xin Ning, 2 Teamwork
•
William, 2 Diligence
Thank you for
your
attention