8th Grade Expository Unit
Summative On-Demand Writing
8th Grade Expository Unit
On-Demand Writing
Texts: “Today’s Immigrants” and
“Mexico – Life at the Border”
REMINDER
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Write your response to the writing prompt below.
You many give your writing a title if you like, but it is not necessary.
You may NOT use a dictionary. If you do not know how to spell a word, sound the
word out and do the best you can.
You may either print or write in cursive.
Write clearly! Any erasures or strike-throughs should be as clean as possible.
Writing Task:
Write an essay in which you explain the concerns that exist today in the United
States over illegal and/or legal immigration. Your essay should include an
explanation of the situation and any problems and solutions that come to mind.
To develop your essay, be sure to use specific evidence drawn from articles you
have read – including the articles mentioned above – and/or any prior knowledge
you have acquired on the issue.
CHECKLIST FOR YOUR WRITING
The following checklist will help you do your best work. Make sure you:
_____carefully read the texts and the description of the writing task.
_____develop a clear thesis (claim) related to the writing task.
_____organize your writing with a strong introduction, body and conclusion.
_____use specific details and examples to fully support your ideas.
_____vary your sentences to make your writing interesting to read.
_____check for mistakes in grammar, spelling, punctuation, capitalization, and sentence
formation.
Note: This format is similar to the California High School Exit Exam and meets the following 8th grade
standards: R. 2.2, 2.3; WS 1.1, 1.3, 1.5; WC 1.1-1.6
SDSC Mid-level Expository Unit 8/13/07
8th Grade On-Demand Expository Writing Samples
Looking at what students are doing, and not doing, to inform instruction
Name/
Score
#1
Just to Be
Free
Strengths
Areas to Focus on / Teaching Implications
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Writes in an organized and logical way
Varies sentence structure with proper
conventions
Shows understanding of both articles
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Has a strong, heartfelt opening that
synthesizes the articles and perhaps some
personal feeling/voice. The complicated
issue comes out right away.
Takes risks with some complex sentence
structures
Demonstrates voice
Weaves thesis and ideas throughout
the piece
Crafts word choice deliberately
Sees himself as a writer
Uses conventions creatively
Elaborates in a purposeful way
Enhances intended effect through
repetition and sentence structure
(clauses at the front end of statements).
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#2
Throughout
History
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#3
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A New
Home
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#4
Mexico
Life at
The Border
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#5
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Immigration ƒ
Concerns
The U.S.
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Challenge this student to “bring herself/himself” into
the writing
Help student to work on “showing” along with the
“telling” – elaborating on why it matters – drawing
some conclusions – and cultivating voice along with
the facts
Work with student on providing more evidence to
support the student’s big idea.
Work with student on verb/tense agreement
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Encourage student to revise conclusion for clarity
Look into publishing opportunities for this student
Help student hone his sarcastic edge in other forms of
writing
ƒ Discuss voice and awareness of audience and purpose
when using sarcasm and the importance of backing up
prior knowledge /opinions with
documented facts. Perhaps suggest the student
avoid using numbers or exact percentages if
he/she can’t back it up with evidence
Understands what the reading is about and
knows how to “lift” and “manipulate” the
words
Organizes the given information into
paragraphs
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Use student’s ability to manipulate the language to
focus the student’s revision into a paper that uses
his/her own words
Effectively blends/synthesizes the two
articles with some interpretation.
Uses quotes effectively
Has a fluid style of writing (e.g. “As it is
stated, some issues are)
Speaks to the prompt
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Work with student to develop a more well-defined
and coherent thesis – less broad
Work on voice –With a more clearly defined thesis,
perhaps more of student’s own voice would come
Encourage student to take risks to become more
personally engaged with the topic- what is it he/she
really wants to say about this?
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Writing Sample #1
Just to be Free
One of the largest growing problems in the United States is that of illegal
immigration. Each year, between three and four hundred thousand people attempt to cross
the border between the United States and Mexico illegally. It is not a simple task,
however, to cross this border as there are eleven thousand US Border Patrol agents to
prevent these illegal entries from taking place. This problem of illegal immigration has
led to violence, drug problems, and even numerous counts of murder.
A major problem that is proposed at the border involving immigrants planning to
illegally cross the United States/Mexico border is violence. At the time that the provided
article was written, there were as many as five hundred people murdered along the
border. Many of these were a result of deadly clashes between criminal gangs. Not only
are people being murdered in gang clashes, but are also being killed by children who are
being recruited/paid to smuggle drugs into the US and shoot people. This is not,
unfortunately, the only way that people are being killed when trying to cross the border
illegally. Each year, approximately four hundred people die because they get lost in the
desert or drown in rivers while attempting to cross into the United States. These people
are risking their lives to have a chance in another country that is abundant with
opportunities, which is a very heavy choice for people to need to make.
The United States government and lawmakers are working on laws to prevent this
growing problem from continuing. For example, some Americans have formed groups
called “Minutemen” who volunteer and help out themselves. President George W. Bush,
SDUSD 8th Grade Expository Unit of Study
Writing Sample #1
however, is opposed to these groups and has proposed a program called the guest-worker
program to help control the illegal immigration problem. This program would grant
temporary work permits to many of the illegal Mexicans living in the United States. The
United States lawmakers, however, believe that is not an acceptable solution because it
would reward illegal immigrants for breaking the laws of America. At the current time,
there is no true solution for the problem of illegal immigration but it is hoped that one
will be found soon.
Despite the countless efforts to put an end to the problem of illegal immigration,
no solution has been found. This could be because of the many different opinions on the
subject or simply because this is a very difficult problem to solve. Whatever the reason, it
needs to be resolved because more and more people are losing their lives and are coming
into the United States of America illegally
SDUSD 8th Grade Expository Unit of Study
Writing Sample #2
Immagration: Concerns in the U.S.
The topic of immigration is very contreversial one. There are many concerns in
the U.S.A about illegal imagration. The illegal immagrints are people from other
countries, mainly Mexico, that travel and live in America illegaly. They jump the border
and they use any means necissary to get in America. They can work minimum wage or
less, and generally get jobs other people do not want.
But that is not necisarrilly true. In the article Today’s Immagrints, it is stated that
wages for jobs are low because “there is a supply of cheap labor. If you stop this flow,
wages for those jobs will rise, and legal residents will seek those jobs.” In that same
article, it is also stated that ‘undocumented immagrins’ do not pay taxes. Or at least, they
do not pay state or federal taxes. These issues have got America concerned with what to
do.
Some other issues are, as it is stated in Mexico: Life at the Border, terrorism. The
bad security at the border makes it easy for an illegal immagrint to smuggle a dangerous
thing in America. So what are some solutions to all of these problems?
Well, Bush suggested a guest workers program, This would give the immagrints
permits to temporarly work in America. However, most oppose to this ‘solution’, and it
will not be put into effect. And as for the number of immagrints jumping the border, there
are “Minute men.” These volunteers protect the border as best they can from any illegal
crossing.
SDUSD 8th Grade Expository Unit of Study
Writing Sample #2
So, all in all, there are many concerns in the U.S.A. about immigrants. But, it is
not only a U.S problem. Illegal immagrasion poses problems worldwide. So what are we
going to do about it? We need a solution, before its too late.
SDUSD 8th Grade Expository Unit of Study
Writing Sample #3
A New Home
The problem on illegal immigration, while existant, is blown vastly out of
proportion. Hundreds and hundreds of thousands of Hispanic Central Americans attempt
to migrate into the U.S. and 40,000 of them are minors under 18. People like these will
rest at church shelters, to gather strength before immigrating illegally. The majority of
these people escape Mexico or elsewhere in Central America so they can rid themselves
of poverty or unemployment.
There are indeed some problems formed by immigrants. The government claims
that the Hispanics will bring terrorism to the country. While lawmakers think this is the
biggest concern, it’s really only a minor threat. A larger problem, though not exactly
horrific to the government, is the rash efforts Border Patrol goes in order to keep Central
American citizens out. According to the Mexican government 500 people were murdered
on the border. Despite that most of these are deaths by gangbangers, Border Patrol
doesn’t seem like they could care less. Smugglers also, are present but it seems unlikely
the majority of people bring horrible things into the country. Last, but not least, there is
the issue of employment for these people, and what they will do when they get in the
country.
The problems mentioned in the last paragraph are all there and none of them are
complete lies. However, the government of USA seems to have worked themselves up
into a frenzy over much less of a problem than what they make it out to be. All of their
pandemonium over so-called “terrorism” is 95 percent stupid. The vast majority of
anyone in the entire world has little to no intent of hurting anybody, and any person who
SDUSD 8th Grade Expository Unit of Study
Writing Sample #3
disagrees doesn’t know what they’re talking about. Smuggling is another problem which
hardly ever happens, and everybody goes crazy over almost nothing. Note that while it
does happen, and does exist, there isn’t much chance more than at most one percent of
immigrants pose the slightest threat.
There are several efforts to stop what problems there may be, and some of them
are good ideas, and some well…aren’t. One of the less fantastic plans is that of putting
another 4,000 officers on Border Patrol. All this is going to do is increase the violence on
the border and if someone with a so-called nuclear bomb in their shirt can get past 11,000
officers, another 4,000 is a waste of resources. Another dimwitted idea is that of using
“Minutemen”, volunteers also wanting to place their eyes on the border. Somehow, they
seem to think that they are more important because “they were here first.” Using this
kindergarten playground logic, the Minutemen have come to a consensus that immigrants
are stealing jobs from U.S. citizens. The only idea out there that has potential is,
surprisingly, the President’s. In what is his first half-good idea in five years, he wants to
grant temporary work permits to illegal immigrants.
While George Bush’s idea is a step up from the others, it still isn’t good enough.
Because the “horror and mass hysteria” of immigration never happens, some solutions
are there which the government doesn’t notice because they are blinded by prejudice.
One absolutely novel idea (not really) is treating the immigrants like actual human
beings. There is certainly no means to completely stop any security, taking the
ferociousness down a couple notches wouldn’t hurt. Really, not much is stopping the
government from simply doing a check on immigrants, and then letting them be on their
merry way.
SDUSD 8th Grade Expository Unit of Study
Writing Sample #4
Throughout history, people have come in face with lots of challenges in the
United States in the events of shaping our nation. What our forefather wanted was the
thought that this nation would rise and live on as a place to remind all citizens of
freedom, liberty, and rights that the people have. However, many problems still occur
over the course of history about laws and structures and the meaning of independence
that yet continue to occur today. Now in America, governments was to face with difficult
problems concerning illegal immigrants crossing the border. Although governments and
patrol leaders defied and stop these immigrants, the determination of immigrants still
give them reasons as to why to cross the border.
Today problem that Americans face was illegal immigration of about 300,000 –
400,000 people try to cross border illegally every year. What official notice was that ten
percent are kids under 18 years old trying to cross the border. Their reasons as to why
they chose to escape was to have a better lives and to escape poverty in their homeland.
Teens and adults willing to risked their life to cross the border knowing of the violence
there. Some are recruited to smuggle drugs and while other are paid to shoot people,
violence continue to occur at the border as 400 people die trying to cross border every
years.
SDUSD 8th Grade Expository Unit of Study
Writing Sample #5
Throughout South America Migrants travel up to the U.S. – Mexican Border and
try to cross, hoping to get a job or even a better life here in the U.S. The U.S – Mexico
border stretches about 2000 miles between San Diego, California, and Brownsville,
Texas. Although thousands of Mexicans cross the border everyday many others cross in
illegally everyday at a great risk. About 300,000 to 400,000 people cross the border
illegally each year, and about 10% of these people are minors, which are people under the
age of 18. There is also a shelter, a large mexican city named Reynosa, just south of
McAllen, Texas. About 200 migrants each year stop at this church shelter to rest before
trying to cross the border. Overall, many Mexicans just want a better life in the U.S.
There are many dangers at risk trying to cross the U.S. – Mexican border. There
are about 11,000 U.S. border agents on duty to stop immagrants everyday. The U.s. is
even thinking of adding 4,000 more agents over the next 5 years to help stop immagrants
from crossing over. According to the Mexican government, about 500 people die each
year at the border; most of these deaths are the result of big clashes between violent
gangs. Also, each year there are 400 more deaths because the people trying to cross over
to the U.S. get lost in deserts or drown in rivers. Many mexicans put white crosses along
the border of Tijuana to honor those who died trying to cross the border every year. They
blame this on the lack of security at the border. U.S. lawmakers are also worried about
how the lack of security leaves the U.S. wide open to terrorists threats. Some americans
have even made teams called “Minutemen” who help the border patrol too. But our
president, George W. Bush, opposes these “Minutemen” and call them vigilantes.
SDUSD 8th Grade Expository Unit of Study
Writing Sample #5
Bush has proposed an idea of how to help the illegal immagrints in the U.S. He
proposes a guest worker program that would give temporary work permits to many illegal
Mexican laborers. Apparently about half of the 10 million Mexicans in the U.S. are
considered illegal. Many U.S. lawmakers are against the program who just see it as
rewarding criminal behavior. Although many lawmakers are against the program,
american hotels and restaurants still hire illegal immagrants because they will work for
less money than U.S. standards. Many Mexicans cross the border everyday in hope of a
better job or life, and this program will help them. Apparently, having a good education
in Mexico won’t get as good a job as one in Texas.
SDUSD 8th Grade Expository Unit of Study