6 ▪ WESTMAN THIS WEEK
THE BRANDON SUN ▪ THURSDAY, MAY 4, 2017
Parenting in a world of entitlement
Children are naturally selfcentered. Your young child is
wired to think primarily of
what works best for her, in this
moment. As she grows,
however, she will begin to
learn that she needs to take
other people's feelings and
needs into account. She starts
to understand that she cannot
automatically have everything
she wants, or have things go in
her favour all the time.
Unfortunately, our society
caters to the notion that not
only children, but adults as
well, have the right to get what
they want, when they want it.
As a parent, you may often feel
pressure to give your child
more and more so she will
always be happy. This, of
Shawna Munro
PARENTING
POINTS
Shawna Munro works at the Elspeth
Reid Family Resource Centre, a
facility of Child and Family Services
of Western Manitoba that offers
parenting information and support.
» 255 Ninth St., Brandon
» 204-726-6280
course, is not a good long term
solution.
There are many small ways
that you can avoid falling into
the trap of raising a child with
an unrealistic sense of
entitlement.
Do not give in to a tantrum.
Your young child experiences
many strong emotions, and
often will have difficulty
expressing them appropriately.
When
he
is
feeling
overwhelmed, it is completely
normal and understandable
that he may have a temper
tantrum. When this happens,
you need to keep him safe,
allow it to pass, then comfort
him and move on. However,
if you reward a tantrum by
giving in to your child's
demands, he will come to see
this as an effective way to get
what he wants.
Let
your
child
be
responsible. Try not to fall into
the habit of doing things for
your child that she could do
for herself. Sometimes it may
seem easier and faster to do it
yourself. This way you know
it is done right, and you do not
have to struggle making your
child do something she doesn't
want to do. Other times, you
may simply underestimate
your child's capabilities. Given
the opportunity, she might
surprise you with what she is
able to accomplish.
Give your child ageappropriate chores to help
teach
responsibility
and
independence. Allow your
child to make choices, to make
mistakes, and to solve
problems.
Encourage gratitude. Help
your child think about what he
has rather than what he does
not have. Take time to talk
about all the good things you
and your child have seen and
done throughout the day. Find
ways to give to others, whether
it is donating toys and clothes
that your child no longer needs
or doing something kind for a
friend or someone in need.
Express your gratitude
towards your child. Thank
him when he helps you, and
tell him often how much you
love and appreciate him.
Choose experiences over
material things. Instead of
buying a treat or toy, spend
extra time enjoying an activity
together. Stop to play a little
longer, read an extra story, go
to the park, or include your
child in what you are doing
around the house.
Often, when your child is
asking you for things, what she
really wants is your attention.
When you feel pressured to
give more and do more for
your child than you should,
shift your focus to the long
term effects of your actions. A
child who has everything may
never feel satisfied as long as
there are still other things out
there to be acquired. But
when you give your child
opportunities to learn to be
independent, resilient and
thankful, she will be better
equipped to live a more
balanced life.