ONE FLESH -­‐ (The Power of Love and Respect – part 1) Ephesians 5:22-­‐33 (Genesis 2:23-­‐24) And Adam said: "This is now bone of my bones And flesh of my flesh; She shall be called Woman, Because she was taken out of Man." Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. How can two imperfect people, (husband and wife), become “one” in marriage. Men and women are “different.” (eating off one another’s plate; observation: blinkers and parking). The focus of Paul’s exhortation here has more to do with, how to “continue” being “one!” After saying “I do,” how do we keep from saying “I don’t?” Today, we will focus on two aspects of a “biblical” marriage; its significance and prerequisites. SPIRITUAL SIGNIFICANCE: Recently, someone sent me a statement on marriage issued by the Oceanside United Reform Church, in Carlsbad, California; to the U.S. Government. It reads in part: ARTICLE. There are two “basic” reasons why demonic forces seek to “redefine” marriage: (1) Marriage is an expression of the gospel. In the Garden God revealed not only His ordained institution (marriage), but also His “design,” for “biblical marriage”; a union between “one” man and “one” woman! Adam called Eve “woman” – not a “woe” to “man”; but “Woe…Man!” I remember the first time I saw Norma, the whole earth seem to stop! “Woe!” “man!” She still takes my breath away today! Woman – literally means: “womb-­‐man” -­‐ taken out of man’s (Adam’s) side. As the saying goes: “Woman was taken not from man’s head to be over him, nor beneath his feet to be walked on, but from his side, near his heart; that they may walk together, as one!” “Prophetically,” Adam and Eve’s union represented the “gospel” message; through faith in Christ, (the groom), as our “husband redeemer,” we (the church) is made one with God, as the “bride,” of Christ! Thus, your marriage reflects this truth; as a reminder to mankind of the intimacy God desires with us – hence the reason it is constantly under attack; and our need to fortify it! Today the biblical definition of marriage has been “altered” in order to accommodate the sinful lifestyle of mankind. Satan, covertly and overtly, seeks to undermine the message of the gospel; If I can get them to defy God’s message in the Garden, they will reject His message at the cross! By rejecting God’s design (one man/woman) within the institution of marriage, is clearly “rebellion” against God! Jesus said: (Mark 10:9) Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate." SEPARATE – Chorizo: to place a room between, to go away. We have dared to set a room for rebellion between ourselves and God, a room with no view (way) to “eternity.” Make your marriage “count” for Christ, by holding fast to God’s original design, and the truth of His word. (Luke 21:33) Heaven and earth will pass away, but My words will by no means pass away. The second reason: (2) Biblical unions are a threat. Jesus sent the disciples out “two by two.” Often times, within a marriage, you’ll find couples, although under the same roof, living “independently” of one another! Satan knows that “two” is better than “one,” (Eccl. 4:9, 10). If he can keep couples “apart,” he can damage to their marriage and the Kingdom of God. Jesus said: (Luke 11:17) “a house divided cannot stand!” Husbands and wives should be “allies” to one another, rather than “enemies.” “Prayer” is the means by which we should “fight” to assure our attacks are directed at the “right enemy!” It’s always a tragedy when soldiers are killed by “friendly fire!” Movie: “War Room!” An appropriate prayer for your marriage: “Lord, teach us how to fight!” (Ephesians 6:12-­‐13a) “For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this age, against spiritual hosts of wickedness in the heavenly places. Therefore take up the whole armor of God…” The fact that we are in a ‘spiritual war” is the reason why the apostle Paul exhorted the believers in Corinth, to not be “unequally yoked,” with unbelievers, (2 Cor. 6:14-­‐18). However, Paul also instructed, if they are in such a relationship, “stay” in that marriage as a witness to your spouse, (1 Cor. 7:13-­‐
16). SPIRITUAL PREREQUSITES: There are two prerequisites to a successful, Christ-­‐
centered marriage; the “Spirit” and “Submission.” Spirit: (v.18b) “Be filled.” The Greek verb is in the “present tense” meaning: “Keep being filled.” The verb is also “passive” meaning: we do not fill ourselves, but rather “permit” the Spirit to “fill” us! To be “filled” has nothing to do with filling up, like filling a gas tank; but rather, it means: “controlled by.” The Jews (Acts 13:45) were “filled” envy; thus, they were “controlled” by “envy.” If your life (marriage) is filled with suspicion, anger, resentment, selfishness, etc., then your marriage is “controlled” by the same! Apart from the Spirit, every thought will be molded according to what controls you; and will work against God’s plan of “unity” within your marriage! Death to “self” (“I die daily” – 1 Cor. 15:31b), is the means by which you yield control to the Spirit in your marriage. We die so others (our marriage) can live. (2 Corinthians 4:11) For we who live are always delivered to death for Jesus' sake, that the life of Jesus also may be manifested in our mortal flesh. So then death is working in us, but life in you. Your marriage may be on life support today, due to your unwillingness to “die” so that it might live! The second prerequisite is Submission: (v.21) A word to “engaged” Christian couples: “submission begins be you say “I do!” One commentator writes: “The Christian couple must be careful to submit to Christ’s Lordship even before they are married. Unless the couple prays together and sincerely seeks God’s will in His word, their marriage begins on a weak foundation. Sins committed before marriage (“We’re Christians we can get away with this!”) have a way of causing problems after marriage.” (Wiersbe). (Philippians 2:3b) “…but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself.” Our goal should be how to “out serve” one another! A successful marriage begins with “mutual submission,” first toward God. Without reverential fear, respect for Christ, any marriage is susceptible to demonic seduction! I’ve seen marriages which outwardly look like a Norman Rockwell Saturday Evening Post, “portrait,” whose marriage and family was decimated, due to one or both partners, “irreverence” towards the Lord! Submission in accordance with God’s word produces “peace” within our relationships; (ttt) James 3:13-­‐18. Thus, We submit, not because your husband/wife is worthy; but as an act of “worship,” because He is worthy! “But what if…” (Rom. 12:18) as much as depends on you! Next week we will see practically what that looks like within the confines of “biblical” marriage. Keep an “open” heart to the working of the Spirit in your marriage. Openness is essentially the willingness to grow, a distaste for ruts, eagerly standing on top-­‐toe for a better view of what tomorrow brings. A man once bought a new radio, brought it home, placed it on the refrigerator, plugged it in, turned it to WSM in Nashville (home of the Grand Ole Opry), and then pulled all the knobs off! He had already tuned in all he ever wanted or expected to hear. Some marriages are "rutted" and rather dreary because either or both partners have yielded to the tyranny of the inevitable, "what has been will still be." Stay open to newness. Stay open to change. (Grady Nutt, in COMMUNION: reminds us of God’s ultimate desire for us, to be “one” with Him. It is also the means by which we can experience healing in our relationships. At the “cross,” walls can be broken down and two can become “one!” (ttt) Ephesians 2:14-­‐16. Homemade, July, 1990.)